


It’s A Better Place Since You Came Along

by Ashleyparker2815



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Baby Peter Parker, Gen, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Iron Man 1, Iron Man 3, Kid Peter Parker, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker is Tony Stark's Biological Child, Peter gets bit, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Precious Peter Parker, Protective Jarvis (Iron Man movies), Protective Tony Stark, Sad Peter Parker, Separation Anxiety, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-16
Updated: 2020-07-11
Packaged: 2020-10-19 11:28:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 88,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20656496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashleyparker2815/pseuds/Ashleyparker2815
Summary: Tony Stark had never been the type of person to become a father. With all of his drinking, partying, sleeping around and bad habits, he just wasn’t the type to raise a child. That was until he found out he had a son and then everything changed.





	1. Oh my child

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so I had this idea about 10 minutes ago and now I’m writing it because omg I love it!! 
> 
> What you need to know is that Tony isn’t Iron Man yet but he will eventually become Iron Man. This fic will not follow the plot lines of everything that happens in the Iron Man or Avengers movies expect for the fact that Tony will eventually become Iron Man. 
> 
> I’m just gonna kinda go with the flow here and just write so sorry if it might be a little confusing, you can ask me any questions you have at any time:))
> 
> I hope you guys like this

Tony woke up with a hangover. 

His head was killing him and everything felt weird but despite that feeling he still got out of bed and headed straight down for his lab. 

It didn’t even feel like he slept last night at all but he guessed he did sleep at least a few hours considering how awful he feels right now.

Tony could barely remember anything from last night but he guessed that that was a good thing because he knows how he gets when he drinks a lot so he’s thankful that he doesn’t have any memories of that himself. Unless he really messed up then he would like to have that memory but so far Pepper wasn’t at his bedroom door banging on it to wake him up and yell at him for what he did so he counted that as a win. 

Once Tony was in his lab he started to play around with some blue prints he was working on a few weeks ago. He was about to start where he left off last time but he looked up and saw Pepper walking into his lab looking really angry for some reason. 

Maybe he did mess up last night and it just took her longer to get over here. 

Tony held up his hands in surrender “Whatever happened last night can you please not yell at me until I’ve finished at least two cups of coffee?” 

Pepper slammed down a file on his work desk but he paid no attention to it because he was too busy looking at Peppers angry face. 

“Tony, do you have any idea what you’ve done?” Pepper asked firmly. Tony hated when she used that voice on him because he wouldn’t admit it to anyone but it kinda scared him and made him want to listen to her. 

That’s part of the whole reason why he hired her to work for him. He liked what he saw and how she gave off powerful women vibes and that’s what he needed in his life so he hired her as his personal assistant. It had been this way for almost a year now and Pepper has walked into his lab many times with a look similar to this one on her face but it was never this bad before. 

Tony pushed off on his desk a bit so that his chair could move away from Peppers accusing finger that was pointed at him “Look, whatever I did last night I didn’t mean to do it so if you could... not look at me that way, that would be nice” 

Pepper crossed her arms and for a second Tony thought that she was gonna start yelling at him but then her face softened and she put her hand over her face. 

Tony watched her now with some concern of his own. She looked up at him and sunk into a chair that was on the other side of the desk. 

Tony wanted to say something but he didn’t. They just stared at each other for a few seconds before Pepper took a deep breath and spoke. 

“Tony, you’re a dad” Pepper said. 

It took awhile for that statement to process in his mind and when it did he opened his mouth to say something but then shut it. 

He doesn’t remember too much of last night or anything at all for that matter but he knows how sex works and that it would take nine months for a baby to actually be born in order for him to be a dad. 

Pepper saw his confusion so she continued “You know that I’m always dealing with women claiming to be pregnant with your kid but it’s never true. That is until today”

She paused before continuing “I got a call from this lady today, her name is Mary Parker and at first I just thought that she was another woman claiming to be pregnant with your kid but she already had the baby and she didn’t want anything from you, no money, no fame, nothing so I asked her how you guys met and she said that you met at a party about a year back and so I tracked down the guest list for that party and found her name along with your name on it” 

Tony felt like he wasn’t breathing. If everything that Pepper was saying was even close to being true then that means that he was a father and that... that just wasn’t possible. There was no way that he could have a baby. 

Although now that he thinks about it the name Mary Parker does sound familiar. If he remembers correctly then he took an interested in her because she was a scientist and he liked how smart she was. Then they got carried away and went to a hotel room and then...

“She could still be lying” Tony said because even though they did have sex that doesn’t mean that he could be the dad. It could just be really good timing with another guy “How do you know for sure that I’m the dad?” 

“I don’t know for sure and that’s why I told her to bring the baby by the hospital later today where I will be meeting her and we will run some tests to figure out for sure” Pepper explained. She sounded a little bit sad for some reason but Tony chose to ignore it. 

“So... so she already had the baby then?” Tony asked curiously. Pepper nodded. “Is it, you know, a boy or a girl?” 

“It’s a boy” 

Tony looked down and smiled but then he wiped his nose and stood up making sure to wipe the smile off his face as well so Pepper couldn’t see. He had no idea why he even smiled to begin with. 

And there was also no way that this kid was his so he wasn’t that worried. 

“You can either come or stay here” Pepper stood up and got ready to leave “if you choose not to come then I need a urine sample from you to compare to the baby’s” 

There was no way Tony was gonna waste his time in going to the hospital filled with tons of diseases just to find out that a kid that he already knew wasn’t his, wasn’t his. And he really didn’t want to see the girl he hooked up with over nine months ago again. 

“I’ll pass on going” Tony called out to Pepper across the room “Just give me something to pee in” 

Pepper shook her head disapprovingly as she went back upstairs. 

Tony watched her leave and then went back to what he was gonna start working on before Pepper came down and interrupted his work. 

He thought that he would easily get back into his work but he couldn’t seem to stop thinking about Mary Parker and everything that Pepper said to him. If she was right and the test was positive then he would be a dad to a baby boy. Tony imagined what he looked like and what he would be like but then he stopped himself because it was impossible. 

There was just no way that he was a dad. He’s had sex with many many girls and he was always carful. He’s had some pregnancy scares but that’s all they were, scares and nothing more.

Tony gave up trying to work in his lab because he couldn’t focus on anything that he was doing which was ironic because usually he comes down to his lab to help him focus on things but now it was just different. 

Pepper had really put it in his mind that he had a kid and he knew it wasn’t her fault as well as the fact that the kid wasn’t his but he couldn’t stop thinking about it for some odd reason. 

He made his way to his bedroom where he went into the shower to try and feel better because although the headache was going away and wasn’t nearly as bad as it was when he woke up it was still there a bit so he hoped the shower would make it go away. 

After the shower he wrapped a towel around himself and stood in the bathroom mirror as he looked at himself. He thought about the kid that was supposedly his and what he would look like or what a kid would look like if he actually had one. 

Not that he ever would but what Pepper said just really got his mind thinking about things that he’s never thought about before. Things that seemed so impossible and unlikely until today.

Tony opened his bathroom cabinet and pulled out his razor so he could shave his beard that made him look like he hadn’t had a proper shower in weeks. 

There was a light knock on his bathroom door which caused Tony to roll his eyes because there was only one person who that would be. There was only one person who that would always be unless Pepper left him as well. Even if she was just his assistant. 

He opened the bathroom door and smiled at her as he turned back to his mirror to continue rubbing his aftershave on his face. 

“I’m glad you’re finally taking care of yourself” Pepper said then she placed something on the counter. 

“Hey, I take care of myself... when it matters” Tony shrugged because she had him there. He glanced down at the container that she placed on his counter. 

“Pee in it” She told him “I’m leaving in twenty minutes so pee quickly” 

At that she left and Tony was left staring at the container she left behind. 

Tony was about to pick it up so he could pee in it but then he decided to go to the hospital with Pepper. He had nothing else to do today so it wasn’t like he had to cancel plans or anything so it would be fine. 

That way he wouldn’t have to wait for the news that he wasn’t the dad and he could hear it first hand. 

Tony went into his closet and got dressed in some jeans and a T-shirt before grabbing the empty pee container and walking into the living room where Pepper was. 

“Here” Tony handed her the empty container. She took it from him and realized it was empty then looked up at him with a very annoyed look on her face. 

“Tony, I don’t have time for this right now-“

“I’m coming with you so you don’t need my pee” Tony shrugged “Unless you still want it to keep for yourself then in that case I’ll go fill it up-“

Pepper rolled her eyes and placed the empty container in her purse “I would never need that. Are you sure you wanna come?” 

“Yep. I’m driving so let’s go” Tony began walking towards the front door because if he talked about it any longer he would think twice about it and he wouldn’t be coming anymore and he really wanted to come for some odd reason. 

.  
.  
.

They made it to the hospital after the long thirty minute car ride. 

It felt a lot longer than it actually was for Tony because the closer he got the more nervous he felt and he had no idea why! 

He knew what the outcome would be and then he would be going back to his everyday life again. 

Even if there was that slight chance that the kid actually was his son then Tony would still be going back to his everyday life because there was no way he would be taking the baby home with him. 

There were some people in this world that were meant to be parents and others that weren’t supposed to be parents and he was one of those people that weren’t meant to have kids. It just wasn’t written in the stars for him. 

So either way he would return to his normal life. 

Tony parked the car and shut it off. He didn’t realize his hand was shaking until Pepper placed her smaller hand on top of his and squeezed it. 

He looked at her and gave her a small smile before turning away and getting out of the car “Let’s go. No point in keeping the kid waiting” 

Pepper and Tony both walked into the hospital without any words said between the two which was uncommon. There was always talking between the two because Tony was a chatter box and Pepper would never admit it but she liked to listen to Tony talk. 

Pepper walked up to the front desk in the hospital but Tony chose to stay in the far corner just because he didn’t want anyone to notice him but also because he suddenly felt really uncomfortable. 

“We have to wait in room 302” Pepper walked over to Tony and said before she started walking away with him following her. 

“What’s in room 302?” Tony asked. 

“That’s where we’ll be meeting Mary Parker” 

When they arrived on the third floor at room 302, Tony took a calming breath before Pepper opened the door. He wasn’t sure he was ready to see what was behind the door but he didn’t have time to pause because sometimes you gotta just go for things. 

Pepper pushed the door open and walked in but when Tony followed her inside there was no one there. No women. No baby. 

“Where is she?” Tony asked looking around the room like he would find her in a corner or something. 

Pepper sat on the bed and crossed her legs “Be patient, Tony. She’s probably running a little late” 

Tony sat down on the bed next to her “Late? We’re late. She’s probably not even gonna show up at this point” 

Pepper rolled her eyes and gave him a dirty look “I have to deal with you everyday so I’m used to it” 

Tony didn’t have time to answer because the hospital door was being opened and in came Mary Parker. Tony unconsciously held his breath as she stepped into the room pushing a black stroller. 

She looked exactly how Tony remembers her. Light brown curly hair with a youthful looking face and big brown eyes. She looks exactly the same except she looks a little bit more tired than he remembers. It probably has something to do with what’s in the black stroller, Tony guessed. 

Pepper was the first one to step forward to shake her hand “Ms. Parker, so wonderful to meet you” 

“Oh please, call me Mary” Mary smiled at Pepper and then turned to Tony. 

“Nice to see you again, Tony. I hope you’ve been doing well” Mary said nicely to Tony. 

For some reason Tony couldn’t find the words to come out of his mouth so he just stared from Mary to the black stroller. 

Mary watched his eye movements and then pushed the stroller forwards but Tony still couldn’t see anything inside “Would you like to see him?” 

Tony looked at Mary and just nodded without even thinking about it. The words still weren’t forming in his mouth. 

Mary stepped towards the front of the stroller and began undoing some straps before she lifted up a blue blob. 

Tony held his breath again as he looked at what was in Mary’s arms. She walked closer to him and he could make out some tiny feet that had blue socks on them and brown soft looking hair sticking out of his blue and white blanket. Tony didn’t even realize he was smiling as he looked at the baby in Mary’s arms. 

“He’s adorable” Pepper pointed out as she leaned over to get a closer look to the baby. 

“He’s two months old tomorrow” Mary said then she held the baby closer to Tony “Would you like to hold him?” 

Tony looked up from the baby at Mary and spoke for the first time since she got there “Uh, no that’s fine” 

The baby made a sound that sounded like a cry and started moving in Mary’s arms. Tony wanted to reach forward and touch the baby’s small hand that he could now see making a tiny fist but he stopped himself.

From his angle he also couldn’t really see the baby’s face but he wasn’t sure if he wanted to at the moment so he took a step back. 

“He probably needs his diaper changed, do you mind if I change him?” Mary asked looking between Tony and Pepper. 

Tony was about to say that yes he did mind because he really didn’t want to see a naked baby and whatever was in his diaper but Pepper spoke “Not at all”

Mary grabbed a bag from the bottom of the stroller and moved towards the bed where she laid the baby down that was now making these sad whines. Tony looked down at him now that he could see the baby’s face and his heart melted. The baby had the biggest cheeks and looked adorable but he would never admit that out loud. 

Mary began to unwrap the baby from the blanket and once she did that Tony could see how tiny he actually was. He looked like a little doll lying there. 

Mary then pulled off his pants and took off the diaper and Tony was getting ready to look away but there was actually nothing in the diaper so he just guessed it was pee or something. Mary spoke as she started wiping the baby clean and Tony looked away because he felt really uncomfortable. 

“Look, Tony, I know that he’s your kid because I wasn’t with any other guy but you at the time” Mary explained and Tony didn’t understand how she was putting a new diaper on at the same time as she spoke “At the time of us, I was taking a break from my boyfriend and him and I hadn’t had sex for months prior and not until months after but by then I was already pregnant with the baby” 

Mary finished changing the baby and then wrapped him up in the blanket and held him in her arms before turning to Tony. 

“I guess we’ll find out that he’s not mine today because there’s no way” Tony crossed his arms and leaned against the wall getting ready to wait for a doctor to come in and do some testings which wasn’t long because a few minutes later the door was being opened and a red head lady was walking in with a tray. 

“Good afternoon, my name is Dorothy and I’m gonna be taking some blood today” The nurse put some gloves on and started doing stuff on the tray. 

When she turned around she was holding a needle in one hand and something in the other hand “Who’s first?” 

“Let’s just get this over with” Tony walked closer to the nurse and let her guide him to a chair where she took his blood. “Alright, now for the baby” 

Mary placed the baby on the bed and the nurse stepped towards the baby and began taking off his pants so she could get some blood from his leg. As soon as the needle went into the baby, he started crying and Tony hated that sound because it was loud and also because it was really sad. 

“Alright, all done here. I’m gonna go run some test and will be back shortly” The nurse said before she left the room with the blood samples. 

Now all they do is wait. 

“Would you like to hold him, Tony?” Mary asked again as she picked the baby up from the bed. He was still crying but not as much now. 

“Uh, no thanks. I’m probably not the best one to hold a kid” Tony crossed his arms again and leaned against the wall. 

Mary gave him a sad look before turning to Pepper “Would you like to hold him?” 

Peppers face lit up and she held her arms out “Yes, I’d love to” 

Tony watched as Mary transferred the baby from her arms to Peppers and he was watching Peppers face soften as she smiled down at the whining baby in her arms. 

Mary sat next to her and spoke “Whatever the results say, although I already know what they’re gonna say, I can’t keep him” 

This caused both Tony and Pepper to look at her questionably so she continued “I never wanted kids. I’m too invested in my job to be able to give him a proper life so if you don’t take him, Tony, then I’m putting him in the foster system. I know it’s not the best place to send a child but I don’t have any other choice” 

Tony uncrossed his arms and leaned closer to Mary. He didn’t know how to feel about this whole thing but there must be another option because the kid wasn’t his, he knew that and Mary wasn’t gonna take him so either way he would end up in the system and he didn’t want that “Don’t you have any friends or family that would take him?” 

Mary sighed “All my friends already have their own kids or don’t want kids and the only family I have is my mom and dad and I’m not giving them a baby” 

“What about your boyfriend? Doesn’t he have anyone who could take the kid?” Tony asked because there was no way there was no where for the baby to go. 

“My boyfriend doesn’t want anything to do with him, it was hard enough to convince him to not make me get an abortion after he found out” Mary stood up and began pacing in the room. 

“So then you put him in the system,” Tony concluded “If there’s no other choice” 

Tony hated the fact that a kid was being put into the foster system but there was no other choice. It would be best in the long run. 

“You’re the other choice, Tony!” Mary all but screamed at him.

Tony had to take a step back and take a calming breath because how could he be the other choice? How could he even be considered an option? 

“No, I’m not-I’m just not the dad type so this isn’t gonna work” Tony shook his head and held up his hands. There was just no way that he could become a parent. Ever. 

Pepper stood up still holding the baby in her arms and stepped closer to Tony “There are other options, Tony, but let’s just wait and see what the results are before we start to worry” 

“Either way, Pep, I’m not taking that kid home with me, you know the life I live. You know how I am” Tony ran his hands over his face and sighed. 

“Tony-“ 

Tony cut her off though because he wasn’t done yet “I woke up with a fucking hangover!” 

In all their yelling no one noticed the nurse walk into the room holding a piece of paper. Pepper sat back down on the bed and continued to hold the baby in her arms and Tony crossed his arms again. 

He could feel his heart beating extremely fast and it was making him feel sick. He just wanted out of there. 

The nurse stepped forward “I have the results. Usually it takes two to three days but we had them rushed as per Mr. Starks request” 

The nurse stopped before speaking “The blood samples we took from Mr. Stark and the baby were a DNA match. You are the father, Mr. Stark” 

Tony felt his heart stop. 

He wasn’t sure if he heard that correctly because the room suddenly seemed to start spinning and he felt sick. He felt like he was about to faint right there on the spot. 

“-ony! Tony? Are you okay?” Pepper was now in front of him but she wasn’t holding the baby. Maybe he got alcohol poisoning last night and that’s why he’s here. Maybe there is no baby. 

Tony was guided to the hospital bed where he put his head in his hands “I told you you were the father, Tony” 

Mary spoke but Tony couldn’t respond. He took a breath and stood up “I can’t-I can’t be his dad” 

The nurse spoke “The DNA test isn’t wrong, Mr. Stark so you are in fact his dad. Whether or not you want to remain in the child’s life is up to you but you are the dad” 

At that the nurse stepped out of the room and left them there. Mary stepped towards the baby on the bed and moved to put him in the stroller as she spoke “Like I told you, Tony, you’re the dad now it’s up to you to decide if you’re gonna care for him” 

Mary paused and then continued “I’ve already made my decision, I don’t want him so if you don’t then I’m gonna be sending him into the system. That’s up to you” 

Mary finished putting the baby in the stroller then she reached her hand out towards Pepper “It was very nice meeting you and thank you for meeting with me. I would have just sent him into the system but I thought that I should at least give him a chance at meeting his dad” 

At that Mary turned and left. 

Pepper turned to Tony “What are you gonna do?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo I hope you guys liked this:) the next chapter will probably be out tomorrow where we find out what Tony does! 
> 
> Let me know if you guys are confused about anything or have any questions because I know I was a little confusing explaining this


	2. When I’m with you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii guys!!
> 
> Why did I think I posted at least 3 chapters on here when I only posted the first chapter?¿ 
> 
> Oops that’s because I wrote a bunch of chapters but forgot to post

Tony turned to Pepper and he couldn’t seem to get any words out of his mouth. 

He knew what he had to do. 

“I-I can’t keep the baby, Pep, I’m not supposed to be a dad. That’s not fair to the kid” Tony looked at the stroller and then back at Pepper before leaving the room. 

He didn’t know where he was going but he couldn’t stay in that room. 

Pepper put her head in her hand and let out a sigh. She knew that Tony couldn’t be a father to this baby because of his life style and all of his bad habits so she knew he was doing the right thing by leaving so now she had to do the right thing and put the child into the system. 

Pepper hit the call button that was by the phone and waited for someone to walk in. When a nurse finally walked in she explained “I don’t know how the whole process works but I would like to put this child into foster care” 

The nurse looked inside the stroller and nodded her head “Is the child yours?” 

“No. He’s my bosses son. Both the father and the mother don’t want him” Saying that caused Peppers heart to drop but she had to remind herself that this was for the best. 

“Alright then. I’ll get a social worker to get the parents to sign away their rights then he’ll be put into the system” The nurse walked out with the stroller and Pepper went to follow her but she stopped her “You can wait at the front desk” 

Pepper thought that was a bit odd but she started to make her way down to the front receptionists desk. She pulled out her phone and texted Tony. 

Pepper: meet me at the front desk to sign over your rights then we can leave

Tony didn’t text her back but he rarely did so she made her way down to the front desk and was surprised to see Mary already there and signing some papers next to who Pepper guessed was a social worker. 

The same nurse who took the baby away came back with no stroller but now holding the baby in her arms. The baby was awake and was looking around at everything. 

“I sighed away all my rights. Also just so you know I hadn’t named him yet because I couldn’t think of anything” Mary told Pepper as she swung her purse over her shoulder “I hope he goes to a good home, it’s just too bad that that wasn’t Tony or I. Bye” 

And just like that Mary was gone. 

Tony walked in a few seconds later and headed straight for Pepper “What do I need to sign?” 

The social worker spoke for Pepper “Mr. Stark, all you need to sign are these papers here that say you are signing over your rights to the child. Meaning that after you sign these he will be no different than any other child you pass on the streets” 

Tony nodded because he knew what he was doing even if it felt like everything in him was screaming at him not to. 

Tony stepped towards the papers and picked up the pen and was about to sign but the nurse holding the baby spoke up “Can you take him please, I gotta go” 

Tony looked up at the woman who was holding his son in her arms and was trying to hand him over to Tony. The baby was now crying and Tony could fully see his face. He had a really big mouth and a loud voice too. 

“Here, just take him” The nurse said desperately and moved closer to Tony to hand the baby over. 

Tony has never held a baby in his entire life so it was kind of scary to hold his arms out and let the nurse transfer the baby into his arms but once she did that the baby fit just right. 

Like he was supposed to be there. 

Tony looked down at him and moved his arm a bit so that his head was better held and the baby stopped crying a little bit. 

Something in him just seemed right. He didn’t know what it was but holding the baby in his arms... it just felt right. 

Tony looked down at him and made eye contact with the baby... his baby. This baby was his, he made his beautiful baby boy that he was holding in his arms and in that moment he knew what he had to do. 

“I’m not signing anything” Tony said to the social worker and stepped away from the papers “This is my son and I’m not putting him in any foster system” 

Pepper stepped towards Tony “Tony, what are you talking about? What are you doing?” 

Tony held his baby close to him as he spoke “This is my son, Pep, he’s mine and I’m not letting anyone take him from me” 

Tony looked down at his son and saw that he was still looking at Tony with those big brown eyes of his. 

“If that’s what you want, Mr. Stark, then he’s all yours” The social worker put the papers away in a case and then left. 

Pepper stepped towards Tony and the baby “What are you doing, Tony? You can’t possibly be serious right now” 

“What? He’s my son so why should I let anyone else raise him?” Tony held the baby protectively against his chest as he spoke because for some reason the only thing he could think of is protecting the small baby in his arms and keeping him safe. 

“You aren’t capable of taking care of a baby” Pepper said angrily “You can’t possibly raise this child and give him everything he needs” 

That hurt. Tony knew that he wasn’t gonna be the best father but he was gonna try and do everything he can. There was simply no way he was gonna let anyone else raise his kid. 

When Tony didn’t say anything Pepper continued “Babies need lots of love and attention, you can’t just throw money at him when he cries and then he’s gonna want you to be there for him and you actually have to and I know you can’t do that so what are you thinking?!”

Tony looked down at his kid who started to cry so he gently started bouncing him up and down “I may not be the best at first but I want to try. I want to be there for him and I am so you either support me or you’re fired” 

Pepper shook her head “You can’t fire me, Tony. I want you to think about this. He can go to a really nice family who will love and care for him” 

“Yeah and what about when he’s older and he finds out that his real mom and dad didn’t want him?” Tony said with rage “What happens when he finds out who his dad is and that I didn’t want him so I put him in the system, huh what happens then?! I want him! He’s my son and I want him, Pep” 

Pepper listened to what Tony was saying and she saw how passionate he was about this so she nodded “Okay, Tony. If you really want this and if you’re really gonna try then I’m gonna support you” 

Tony relaxed because now that Pepper was gonna support him it would make everything a little bit easier “I’m really gonna try, Pep”

Tony looked down at his baby once again in his arms and couldn’t help but smile. 

He had no idea why he wanted to send his kid into the system not even ten minutes ago but ever since he held his kid in his arms he just knew he had to keep him. He just knew. 

Pepper walked closer towards Tony and his kid and looked down at him “Do you want me to go pick up a car seat so you can take him home?” 

Tony thought about that idea but he wanted to buy the best car seat himself and that would take lots of research so he could just hold his kid in the car and tell Pepper to drive safe. 

“I’m just gonna hold him while you drive” Tony started walking towards the hospital entrance with Pepper following behind him. 

“You know how dangerous that is right? And illegal” Despite What Pepper was saying she still followed Tony out to the car and opened the back door for him to get in. 

“It’s only illegal if we get caught and dangerous if you don’t drive safe. So drive safe” Tony hopped into the back seat and let Pepper close the door for him as he situated himself so that he was in a comfortable position and his baby was safe in his arms.

“Are you sure about this, Tony? I don’t know-“ Tony looked at Pepper from the review mirror and and nodded his head. 

“It’s fine. Just drive” 

The rest of the car ride was spent with Pepper staying under the speed limit and glancing in the mirror every so often to see if Tony and the baby were okay. Tony was too busy staring at his baby boy in his arms to even pay attention to what was going on outside the car that he didn’t even notice that they had got to the house. 

Pepper was the first one out of the car and then opened the back door so Tony could get out with the baby. 

“You put him to sleep?” Pepper asked confused because she was sure the baby would cry the whole way home and also because maybe Tony was good with the baby. 

“Yeah... he’s probably already taking after his dad because he likes cars so much” Tony only looked away from his baby so he could see where he was stepping so he didn’t fall out of his car. Pepper shut the door for him and then began walking up to the house. 

Tony knew he had to order a car seat for his baby but he also knew that the baby also needed a lot of other things so he would be doing that first. 

“I’m gonna go up to my room with him and start ordering some stuff that he needs” Tony said to Pepper once they got inside.

She watched Tony carry his baby up the stairs and the sight was something so new and weird to see. She knew that this whole thing would be temporary because there was no way that Tony could take care of a baby right now. Part of her was just waiting for everything to fall apart and the other part of her was curious to see what would happen. 

Sadly, Pepper knew that a day or two from now Tony would go down to his lab and work for hours at a time while the baby was left with her to look after and Pepper was like Tony in that way, she wasn’t supposed to have kids and she didn’t want to. At least not right now. 

Which is why if and when Tony decides to make her watch the baby she will only do it once and then have a long and hard talk with Tony as to why he can’t keep this child. It just wasn’t the right lifestyle to raise a kid. 

Sure Tony would understand. 

.  
.  
.

Tony got up to his bedroom and looked around the room to see where he would place his kid while he did some research. 

He wanted the baby close to him but he also didn’t want to interrupt his sleep. 

Tony decided that the best place would be on his bed that way he could be close to his baby while he did some research on his computer. 

As soon as Tony places his baby down on his bed and moved to get two pillows to place on either side of him, the baby started to make quiet little whimpers that soon turned into a loud cry. 

“What’s wrong, little guy?” Tony put his hand on the baby’s stomach and gently rubbed it but the baby continued to cry and the cry was only getting louder. 

“Look, there’s no need to cry so you can just stop” Tony ran his hand through his hair because he already didn’t know what to do and he had just brought his baby home. It was so overwhelming. 

Pepper walked into the room and placed her hand on Tony’s shoulder which he flinched at because he didn’t hear her walk in “I don’t know why he’s crying” 

Pepper looked down at the baby on the bed and Tony noticed that her face looked sad “Could be lots of reasons” 

She stepped towards the baby more and then looked up at Tony “He needs a diaper change. And he’s probably hungry” 

Tony shrugged his shoulders and began to panic “Well I don’t have any diapers and what does he eat?” 

Pepper stood up straighter and sighed “Usually babies this young breast feed but since you obviously can’t do that I’ll go get some bottles and some formula. I’ll also buy some diapers” 

Pepper walked out without saying anything else and if Tony was more aware and not fully focused on Peter he would have realized that Pepper was disappointed. 

Once she was gone Tony sat on the bed and moved to pick his baby up in his arms. The baby was now squirming around and when Tony put him back in his arms he could definitely feel the wetness from the diaper. He tried to ignore it as he held his baby boy to try and get him to calm down at least a little bit until Pepper got back from the store. 

.  
.  
.

It was a whole hour of screaming and crying until Pepper got back. 

Tony wasn’t sure how something so small and innocent looking could cry that loud for that long. It was actually kinda amazing. 

“Thank god you’re back. What did you get?” Tony moved his way down to the living room shortly after Pepper left because he felt like it would make it easier for him to deal with his baby but he was wrong. 

Pepper placed the bags on the ground and sat down on the couch as she took out a package of diapers, wipes and creams. 

“I got the smallest size of newborn diapers for him because I wasn’t really sure what size he would be so hopefully these fit” 

Tony sat down on the couch with his baby still in his arms as he looked at the package of diapers “Can you help me?” 

As Pepper was lying a blanket down on the ottoman in front of them and getting everything ready so nodded her head “Of course. Just put him on the blanket” 

Tony did as he was told and watched as Pepper began taking off the baby’s pants and then undoing the diaper straps. When she pulled down the front he had to turn away because it was so nasty to look at! 

“Oh god! How is that even possible?” Tony turned away and said disbelief. The kid was practically the size of his hand so how did he poop that much. 

“Oh stop it, Tony. New born babies poo like this. You did when you were his age” Tony ignored what Pepper said as he tried not to gag and watch what she was doing. 

She was wiping the babies bum and front part with the wipes but there was just so much that she had to use a lot of wipes. Once his bottom was cleaned Tony noticed that it was all red and painful looking. 

“What’s he all red?” Tony asked curiously because he was concerned and wanted to know. 

“He got a diaper rash. That’s why I bought the creams” Thankfully Pepper was prepared. 

Tony looked up at the baby’s face and he wasn’t crying anymore but he looked really miserable and was whimpering every now and then. 

Pepper began applying the cream and pretty soon his whole bottom was white with cream and a new diaper was being put on him. 

Pepper stood up “I’m gonna go wash my hands and get him a bottle” 

“Aren’t you gonna put his pants back on?” Tony looked down at his baby and the pants that were lying next to his head and thought if he should do it himself but he didn’t want to do it wrong and hurt his baby. 

Pepper didn’t answer him and now that no one was touching the baby he started to cry again and this time it was a sad cry that not only hurt Tony’s ears but also his heart. 

Pepper came back shortly after with milk in a baby bottle “Here. Pick him up and feed him this” 

Tony looked between her and the baby before leaning forward and picking him up so that he was cradled in his arms. Pepper handed him the bottle which he took without saying anything and began trying to put it near the baby’s mouth. 

The baby immediately latched on and started sucking on it and Tony was thankful that there was no more crying and also that the baby was finally content with a clean diaper and soon to be a full stomach.

Tony watched him and couldn’t help but smile at his baby. He felt Pepper sit next to him and watch the baby “You have to name him. Mary never named him” 

Tony looked up at Pepper confused because how could Mary not give the kid a name. In a way he was kinda thankful for that because now he was gonna be the one to come up with a name. 

That was also a lot of pressure on him. 

He looked down at his baby and thought “Peter. I like Peter” 

Tony had no idea where that name came from but he just thought that it fit. Tony and Peter. Father and son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like this so far:))) omgggg I have sooooooooo many ideas that I can’t wait to write omgggggg


	3. Make me yours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is out so late:( I’ve been busy reading this really long fic and I couldn’t stop reading enough to concentrate enough on writing. Also because I read another fic and it BROKE my heart, like I’m not over exaggerating or anything, I was dying and I couldn’t breathe I was crying so hard reading that fic good god it was painful. But amazing!!!! 
> 
> Anyways 
> 
> ***read end notes***

That night past by in a blur.

Tony was extremely thankful that it wasn’t the drunk kind of blur where you forget everything you did the night before but that blur where everything is happening all at once and so fact so you don’t really know what’s going on and just follow the flow of things instead. That kind of blur.

Tony has no idea what he would do without Pepper because she had helped him change every one of Peters diapers all night. And by help he means actually changed them while he watched and pretended to be busy passing one wipe after another.

It was okay though because he was learning. He was learning and he had Pepper here to help him who was surprisingly really good at changing Peters diapers.

Tony had meant to start looking online for things like a new car seat and a crib for Peter but he didn’t do that yet because Peter was stealing all of his attention away and every time he left his kids sight Peter would start screaming and kicking his tiny little legs.

Pepper told him that he’s gonna be a singer some day with those lungs.

So now here they were, Pepper trying to wipe Peter’s butt for what seems like the 10th time that night while Peter cried and tried to kick the best he could to get away but he was too tiny to actually go anywhere or actually use force on him to get him to stay and Tony was pretending to be busy handing the wipes one by one over to Pepper.

“You know,” Pepper began as she grabbed another wipe from Tony and continued to wipe Peter’s bum as he cried, “you have to clean his diaper eventually”

Tony didn’t want to do that because it looked really hard and it was just nasty.

“I think you’re doing a pretty good job so far” Tony said as he handed Pepper another wipe.

“Tony, I’m not gonna be here all the time, you know that” She gave Tony a look and then reached for a clean diaper. Tony saw her struggling so he picked one up and handed it to her. “Thanks. As I was saying, Tony, I’m gonna be leaving tomorrow afternoon to go to New York and while I’m gone he’s gonna poop and you can’t wait for me to come back to clean it”

Tony knew she was right. It just scared him.

Something so small and precious was in his hands and it really scared him. He didn’t want to mess up or somehow hurt the baby.

“Next time he needs a diaper change, you’re going to do it and I’m gonna help then you’ll know how for all the other times” Pepper finished putting on Peter’s diaper but didn’t bother putting his pants back on.

“So in ten minutes” Tony laughed. It was just past three in the morning and both of them hadn’t gotten any sleep yet. Only Peter but then he would wake up and cry for something.

“Get used to it” Pepper laughed “He’s gonna be in diapers for the next three years. At least”

Tony sarcastically gave a thumbs up and then sat on the edge of the bed and picked Peter up in his arms so he could give him his bottle. He looked down at Peter as he looked up at him with wide eyes. Tony thought about how he still couldn’t believe that this was his kid. His baby.

He just met him but he knew he would already do anything for him.

Pepper however thought differently. “Tony, if you don’t think you can handle this or you want to turn back now it’s not too late. You still have time”

Tony looked away from Peter and up at Pepper with a confused look on his face. “Pep, what are you talking about?”

Pepper sighed and sat down on the bed next to the father and son. “I’m talking about you and him. If you don’t think you can handle this then you need to call social services tomorrow and let them take him away because if you decide this a year from now or even a month from now then it’s gonna be too late because he would have already gotten attached to you”

Tony didn’t like what she was saying. He could partly understand why she would think he wouldn’t want to do this anymore because he had and still has such bad habits and drinking problems but he wanted this. He wanted Peter and now nothing was going to change that.

“I know why you think that and I gave plenty of reason to think that but I’m really gonna try, Pep. I want this. I want him” Tony looked down at Peter who was looking up at him with tired eyes.

It was a beautiful thing that Tony had never in his life thought that he would ever experience. He was thankful that whatever god out there put his son in his arms like this. He felt oddly content.

That was until he felt Peter fart and then there was a warm feeling under the hand that was holding Peter’s butt. So much for feeling content.

Peter’s face scrunched up and turned red then he started to cry with those loud lungs of his “Um, time for another diaper change”

“I’m gonna go to bed and try and get at least five hours of sleep before I have to fly to New York in the morning” Pepper placed her palm on Peter’s tiny stomach and smiled warmly at him even if he was too busy staring up at Tony still to notice.

“I’d say call me if you need me but I don’t wanna get woken up every other ten minutes so only call me if it’s an emergency”

Tony rolled his eyes towards Pepper but agreed anyways. He knew he would definitely be needing her help throughout the night no matter what because he may be the kids dad but he still had absolutely no idea what he’s doing.

Pepper left and it was just Tony and Peter.

Tony knew he wasn’t gonna be getting any sleep the whole night mainly because of Peter and he wanted to be there for him if his baby needed him or if he started crying but also because even if it wasn’t for Peter, Tony would be getting no sleep at all.

He never really slept much to begin with because he was either spending every waking hour in his lab building new weapons and designs or he was out getting drunk and hooking up with random girls he just met.

Tony placed Peter in the middle of his giant bed and placed two pillows on either side of him so he didn’t roll off. Even though it would have been impossible for Peter to actually roll off even if the two pillows weren’t there because Tony was gonna be there watching him the whole night and also because he wasn’t sure Peter could actually roll anywhere yet.

Peter made a few sounds of what sounded like discomfort but Tony wasn’t really sure so he laid down next to him and put his head on one of the pillows and looked over at his son. Peter was still making those sounds and it sounded like he was about to start crying and Tony didn’t want that so he put his hand over Peter’s stomach gently not really sure what he was doing but whatever he was doing seemed to work because Peter stopped the sounds his was making and continued to sleep.

Too scared to move his hand, Tony stayed in that position practically all night until he was about to fall asleep watching his son but just as he let his eyes slip closed as if on cue Peter started crying.

Tony opened his eyes quickly and jumped a bit startled by the sudden cry from his kid. He looked down at Peter who had his mouth wide open and was crying, more like screaming and Tony wasn’t sure if he needed a diaper change or if he was hungry or any other reason that a baby would cry.

Taking a guess, Tony put his hands under Peter’s butt and the other one he put by his neck so he could support his head as he picked the baby up. Something Pepper warned him about earlier on.

He was about to call for Pepper to come help him but he knew that she wasn’t gonna be here all the time and that she was going to be leaving to go to New York tomorrow and he would be alone with Peter so he had to learn how to care for him by himself.

Thankfully Peter seemed to stop crying and go back to sleep. Tony had no idea what he did but whatever it was the kid liked it. He just picked Peter up and leaned him up against his chest.

Tony continued holding Peter in his arms as he found a more comfortable position where he could lie down and continue to hold Peter on his chest.

The comfortable position didn’t last long, maybe only about thirty minutes before Peter was crying again and this time Tony knew the reason. He could practically feel his diaper filling under his hand and it was disgusting.

Tony held onto Peter and sat up in bed. He laid Peter on the towel that was still there from his diaper change from before as he quickly grabbed a clean diaper, wipes and diaper rash cream.

He tried to go over the steps in his head from what Pepper did when she changed Peter’s diapers. He stood in front of the kid and opened the tabs on the diaper pulling down the front of it. Thankfully there was only pee in there, Tony was not looking forward to the diaper he has to change that has poop in it. Especially baby poop because it was... weird.

Tony lifted up Peter’s legs ignoring his cries as he did so and grabbed a bunch of wipes to begin wiping Peter off. The kids cries only got louder with each wipe so Tony was scared he was doing something wrong and was hurting Peter “I’m sorry, kid. I know it’s awkward having someone wipe your butt”

Peter obviously didn’t answer but he did cry louder. Just as Tony was about to finish wiping and start putting some diaper rash cream on his butt, Peter began peeing and his pee somehow managed to hit Tony in the face and get all down the front of his shirt.

“What? Pete-“ Tony didn’t know what to do or how to stop the kid from peeing on him so he just let him.

After Peter was done peeing all over Tony, Tony sighed because he had to clean Peter again with the wipes but now he was covered in pee himself but he couldn’t leave Peter to go shower and he still didn’t wanna get Pepper.

“I’m gonna put some cream on you now” Tony warned Peter “Are you gonna pee on me again?”

Peter didn’t answer again, obviously but he did continue to cry as Tony rubbed the diaper rash cream all over his bum and front part. After that was done he wiped his hands with a clean wipe and finished putting a new diaper on Peter.

Tony sighed in relief after that was done with.

He quickly cleaned up all the dirty wipes and diaper, making sure Peter was surrounded by pillows so he didn’t roll off as he quickly threw out everything in the bathroom and changed into a new shirt. He washed his hands and face before going back into the bedroom where Peter was still crying.

“You peed on me and I gave you a clean butt” Tony said tiredly as he gently picked Peter back up and held him close “What more do you want?”

Tony sat back down and got into the same position as before and Peter immediately stopped crying and went to sleep again “Oh, I see. You just wanted me to hold you then, is that it?”

It didn’t take long for Tony to fall asleep as well with Peter sleeping on top of him.

.  
.  
.

Pepper was awake before Tony and Peter were which she was surprised about so she went into Tony’s bedroom after getting ready to leave for the airport so she could go to New York but when she opened his bedroom door what she saw was not what she expected to be seeing.

She saw Tony lying straight on his back with Peter on his chest and Tony’s hands were both over Peter’s tiny body protectively.

Peppers heart melted at the sight and she thought that maybe she was wrong. Maybe Tony could actually be a good dad for Peter and could actually do this.

She slowly and quietly walked into his bedroom, hoping that she wouldn’t wake the two boys up because it looked like they were comfortable and she knew that Tony was up with Peter a lot throughout the night because that’s just how it was when you have a newborn baby. 

She was surprised that Tony never woke her up after she left but that didn’t mean she wasn’t happy about it. Not that she didn’t want to be woken up because she wanted her sleep but she because it meant that Tony was trying to do it all on her own which made her extremely happy to see. 

Before she left the bedroom she pressed a gentle hand to Tony’s arm and on Peter’s tiny back. 

She decided to leave a note before she left for the airport. 

Tony, 

Congratulations on your first night with Peter. You did amazing and I believe in you. 

Call me if you need anything but I think you got this. 

-Pepper. 

At that she left the two boys to their sleeping while she boarded the plane. 

.  
.  
.

Tony woke up to slight movement on his chest followed by the beginnings of a cry from Peter. 

Tony slowly opened his eyes and used on of the hands that he kept on Peter all night, well not all night but at least two hours of the night, to rub his eyes. Once his eyesight adjusted to the sun coming in through the windows, he glanced down at Peter who was full on crying now so he sat up, ignoring the way his back was hurting from being in the same position for hours. 

“What is it, bud?” Tony asked tiredly “You hungry?” 

Peter kept crying as his answer and as Tony woke up a little bit more he could feel that Peter definitely needed a diaper change as well as the fact that he was probably hungry. 

Sighing, Tony stood up, still holding onto a crying Peter and walked to the edge of the bed and laid him down on the towel that was still there from before. He really needed to get Peter a changing table. And some other baby stuff. 

Once Peter was out of his arms, Tony stretched himself out quickly, trying to get some blood flow back into his limbs. He grabbed a new diaper already thinking about ordering more because at this rate they were gonna be out of the diaper pack that Pepper bought before lunch time. 

Tony then grabbed the diaper cream and wipes and set up everything so he could start changing Peter. 

For some odd reason Tony could just tell that Peter had something in his diaper this time that was more than just pee and when he undid the tabs on the side and pulled down the front, he was right. 

Tony put a hand up to his nose to block the smell before he got a whiff just on instant but he couldn’t keep it there for long because he had to get to work. 

It was the first time he was changing Peter’s diaper that had more than just pee in it and it was actually kinda hard. Well, considering it’s only the second diaper he’s changed. 

Tony took longer than necessary to get Peter’s butt wiped and cleaned and even longer to put a new diaper back on because he forgot the diaper rash cream and had to take off the clean diaper again and put it on then put back on the clean diaper so it was a lot and Tony really hoped that he wouldn’t have to change Peter’s diaper again for at least another few hours but he knew that was very unlikely if not impossible. 

He made sure Peter had pillows surrounding him as he quickly went to wash his hands just in case Peter managed to roll off but thankfully he didn’t go anywhere by the time Tony came back. 

Peter was still crying though and it hurt Tony to hear because he didn’t know why Peter was crying and it was hard to watch his little boy in pain and because it actually hurt his ears from all the crying. 

Although, just like last night, Once Tony picked Peter up and held him close, he stopped crying almost instantly. 

Tony knew he wasn’t good with Peter and that he still probably shouldn’t be the one to take care of someone so small and fragile and the reason Peter always stopped crying was because he was the only one to actually be there for the kid right now but still, Tony couldn’t help but feel pleased with himself every time it happened. 

“How about we go get you some breakfast?” Tony said to no one in particular. He walked over to his nightstand to grab his phone but he saw a handwritten note on a sticky paper so he picked it up curiously and read it over, smiling to himself when he read who it was from and what it said. 

Tony gently leaned down and pressed a kiss to Peter’s bald baby head. It was the first kiss he has given his son and it hoped there would be many more to come. 

He thought that he could do this and with Peppers help he was pretty confident that he could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I’m going on vacation tomorrow and I’m gonna be gone for awhile so I’m not gonna be writing or posting any chapters in 2-3 weeks :(( 
> 
> I’m gonna miss you guys soooo much but I’ll be back:))
> 
> Ok guys also I’m sooo excited because I don’t wanna spoil anything for this fic but I want to tell you guys so badly what I have planned omg ok I’m not gonna tell you but I want to sooo badly omg I’m so excited to write it but just omg I’m excited


	4. I get lost in your beauty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m backkkk!!! I have so many ideas for this fic and I really want to spend more time on it to write all those ideas:)

At first everything had been going well. 

Tony hadn’t let Peter out of his sight for the whole day which was good because if he did then Peter could have gotten hurt somehow but even if he wanted to leave Peter’s sight, he couldn’t. Peter demanded his attention the whole time and would scream if he so much as left the room that Peter was in. 

It was a good thing though because Peter was keeping him busy and helping him not to think about his alcohol cabinet that was practically calling his name from across the room. 

Tony was an alcoholic. Everyone that knew him knew that. Everyone that knew of him knew that he was in fact an alcoholic but he was trying so hard not to be. He was trying so hard to be better for Peter. 

He knew that he couldn’t drink with Peter around because Peter needed him. But Tony was really struggling and he really wanted just one drink right now. 

Pepper had been gone for a full day now and was gonna be gone for another day and Tony had been with Peter non-stop. With all the crying, diaper changes, feeding and everything else that comes along with a newborn baby, Tony was going crazy. 

Pepper had called Tony first at around 11pm that night to speak to Tony and see how he was doing. Tony was extremely thankful that Pepper called him first because the whole day he wanted to call her and beg her to come back just so he could have a break and drink but he didn’t want Pepper to think that he couldn’t do this because he could do this. Maybe. 

“Hey, Tony! How’s it going?” Pepper asked into the phone. Tony could hear some paper moving in the background so he assumed that she was alone in her office. 

Tony wanted to tell the truth and say that he was actually dying but he didn’t “It’s going well. Pete’s asleep right now so we’re just chilling on the couch” 

“That’s good” Pepper said “Sorry I didn’t call earlier I just got out of a meeting and I’ve been so busy” 

“It’s fine” Tony lied “I was just gonna head to bed soon anyways. At least I’ll try to get some sleep in while he’s still asleep” 

Pepper was silent for a moment that Tony thought she hung up so he checked to see but she was still on the call. When she spoke she sounded sad and happy at the same time. “I’m proud of you, Tony” 

It was nice to hear that but Tony wasn’t so sure what he was doing was anything to be proud about. “Yeah” 

“Alright. I’m gonna go now and I’ll see you two tomorrow night. Good luck” Pepper then hung up the phone and Tony was alone with Peter once again. 

.  
.  
.

Tony didn’t end up going to bed. He didn’t see the point in trying to fall asleep in his bed when he knew Peter would be waking up crying at anytime and needing something from him so he stayed awake for as long as he could, which was a very long time because it wasn’t like Tony could actually fall asleep. 

It had been about four hours since he spoke to Pepper on the phone and he still wasn’t feeling all that tired just yet. His thoughts were running wild and he knew that even if he tried to sleep he wouldn’t be able to do it would be best if he stayed awake so he could at least be there for Peter when his kid needed him. 

The alcohol cabinet in the kitchen was still taunting him and Tony knew that he could not drink right now. No matter how badly he so desperately wanted to. 

Tony tried to think about something else until Peter woke up and needed something so he could distract himself. When I actually want you to wake up, you stay asleep. 

Tony leaned his head back on the couch and pinched his nose with his free hand that wasn’t holding Peter. He was scared that this nagging feeling at the back of his mind was never gonna go away. It wasn’t like he could just give up all the drinking and drugs and girls in one night. The addiction to all these things didn’t just go away in one night. These things took time but now Tony wasn’t so sure he wanted to give everything up. 

It was like he was having mixed emotions now. 

Peter came into his life so suddenly and he was his son. Tony couldn’t explain it but he loved Peter. When he lived at him there was just this… feeling that he got in his chest and his whole body that he just knew he loved Peter and that he would do anything for his son. 

It’s the only reason why he would even consider stopping all his bad habits. He would do it for Peter. 

Peter was going to be staying in his life no matter what. There was no way he was gonna send Peter away to some foster care and have someone else raise his child. No fucking way! 

Tony was gonna do everything in his power to make sure that Peter stays in his life no matter what because he knew he wouldn’t be able to live with himself if Peter was taken away from him and forced to live with someone else. There was no way Tony was gonna risk never seeing his son again. 

Peter made a little cooing noise that he made whenever he was about to poop or start randomly crying for no reason so Tony stood up with his baby in his arms and carried him into his bedroom so he could get ready to change him. 

He knew that he had to get Peter his own room for the house to at least keep all his stuff in but Tony wanted to keep Peter in his bedroom for as long as possible. 

Tony was right. Peter started crying and pooping in his diaper so Tony waited until he was finished doing his business and then set him down on the bed to change him. It was a messy one that stunk but it was over quickly because Tony was getting quite good at this whole diaper changing thing. 

“Shh. Shh, Petey. Go to sleep” Tony whispered into Peter’s ear gently which calmed Peter right down and put him back to sleep after a few minutes. 

Tony picked up his phone and decided to make a call while he was awake. 

He waited for the phone to be answered and once it was he smiled “Hey Rhodes” 

“Tony? Why are you calling me at almost five in the morning?” Rhodey asked into the phone, sounding annoyed and concerned at the same time. 

Tony laughed and cupped Peter’s small head in his much larger hand “I just wanted to see how you are” 

Rhodey sighed but by now he was used to his best friends bullshit so it was no surprise “I’m good, Tony, are you good because clearly not if you’re calling me at five in the morning-“ 

“I have a son” Tony blurted out. 

Rhodey didn’t say anything for a few moments and just like with Pepper on the phone he had to check and see if he had hung up or not but he didn’t so Tony waited for Rhoedy to say something. Anything. 

“You what?” Rhodey asked. He sounded mad but also shocked. 

“I have a son” Tony repeated. 

“You have a son? A son? A child?” Tony nodded his head but realized that Rhodey couldn’t actually see him. 

“Yes. I do” 

“Tony… how do you… are you sure?” Rhodey knew probably better than anyone else in the world that Tony slept around a lot and sometimes with many girls at once but he also knew that for that exact reason his best friend was very careful in using protection if not to prevent a baby but from getting any types of sexual diseases.

“Yeah, I’m sure. He’s mine, Rhodes” Tony was happy that he had a son but his best friend didn’t sound that way. 

“Where is he now? How old is he and who’s the mother, Tony?” Rhodey asked his best friend. He did not expect this call from the man at this time of night. Or at all. 

“He’s here with me sleeping and he’s two months old” Tony told him “I want you to come see him tomorrow and I’ll tell you everything” 

Tony didn’t want to explain everything over the phone and he knew it would be better if Rhodey actually came to meet his son. 

“Tony that’s… wow” Rhoedy sighed “Why is he with you? Are you keeping him?” 

Now it was Tony’s turn to sigh “Just come over tomorrow morning and I’ll tell you everything” 

“Alright, Tony. I’ll see you in a few hours then” 

Tony then hung up the phone and positioned Peter on his chest so that he could at least get some sleep. 

.  
.  
.

Peter let Tony sleep for five full hours before he was waking him up demanding attention as well as in need of a diaper change and to be fed. 

It was a perfect time to get up for Tony anyways because he was expecting Rhodey to come over anytime now. 

Tony quickly changed Peter’s diaper and put him in a blue and white onesie then made sure he was safe in bed so Tony could go brush his teeth and get changed. When he came back out Peter was smiling up at him and Tony had to stop what he was doing to look at his kid and take in his beautiful he is. 

“Hey there, baby boy” Tony cooed and Peter kicked his legs up and made bubbly noises at Tony. “Are you excited to meet someone today” 

Peter only kicked his legs in response so Tony scoped him up in his arms and carried him into the kitchen so he could get a bottle ready for him. 

While Tony was feeding Peter, Rhodey walked into the mansion and slowly walked towards where Tony was sitting on the kitchen stool with Peter in his arms sucking on his bottle. Peter was looking up at Tony with trusting eyes that he didn’t even notice the new human walk into the room. 

“Hey” Tony said once he noticed Rhodey walk into the kitchen. “This is Peter” 

Rhodey looked in awe and was looking at Peter with a soft, gentle face that Tony had never seen on him before. 

“Peter” Rhodey repeated. He walked closer to Tony and looked down at his best friends son “Peter” 

“Yeah. Wanna hold him?” Tony asked. He wouldn’t trust anyone else with Peter but his best friend and Pepper. 

“Um… no. I don’t think… right now. Not right now, I just-“ Rhodey cut himself off as he continued to look down at Peter with a gentle look on his face. 

“What are you thinking?” Tony asked. He couldn’t get a read on his best friend right now and he was confused. 

Rhodey shook his head and looked up at Tony for the first time since he got to the house “I’m thinking that this is impossible. This isn’t your kid, Tony. You don’t have a son” 

Tony wasn’t expecting that from him “Well it is possible, Rhodes because this is my son and he’s here. He’s mine” 

Rhodey looked down at Peter again who was still staring up at Tony with his big brown eyes that did look a lot like his best friends eyes. It just didn’t seem believable because Tony was a playboy, he wasn’t meant to have a kid. 

“How do you know?” 

“Pepper got a call a few days ago and then we went to the hospital and got a paternity test done and it said I was the dad so…” Tony noticed that Peter was done drinking so he moved him on his shoulder so he could pat his back and help him burp “His mother is Mary and I remembered her. I remember sleeping with her about a year ago, Rhodey, I know he’s my son” 

Rhodey seemed to try and process the fact that his best friend, Tony Stark has a kid. “What are you gonna do now? Are you keeping him?” 

Tony rolled his eyes because he knew his friend wouldn’t agree with his choice “Yes. I am and I don’t care what anyone says. This is my son. He’s mine and I’m not sending him off to some fucking foster home so he can be raised by a bunch of degenerates and where I never get to see him again” 

Rhodey could see that from the way Tony was talking about Peter that he really did care for the baby but he wasn’t so sure he was right about wanting to keep him. “Not all foster parents are degenerates, Tony. A lot of them are really great people where Peter could get a proper life and raised by people who will love and care for him” 

Tony saw red. Did his best friend actually just imply that he couldn’t and wouldn’t care and love his own kid. “Are you saying that I won’t love him? That I won’t care for my own fucking son” 

Rhodey held up his hands in surrender because he didn’t really know how to handle this situation. “I’m not saying that-“ 

“Well it sure does sound like you are, Rhodey!” Tony yelled and now it was Peter’s turn to get scared because he started squirming and crying on Tony’s shoulder so Tony brought him back into his arms and held him close to try and get him to calm down. 

“I just don’t want you to be making a big mistake here, Tony because this is a huge deal. This is a baby and you can’t decide to raise him but then a few months down the road or a year or five years down the road you decide you don’t want him anymore because it doesn’t work like that” Rhodey explained but Tony already knew all that “If you can’t do this, raise him then you decide now. Right now” 

“Pepper already told me all this,” Tony sighed “but do you think that after a year or even five years that I’m just gonna give him up. This is my son, Rhodey. His mother didn’t want him because she never wanted kids and neither did I but the difference is that I changed my mind once I laid my eyes on him and held him for the first time. I fell in love with him and I’m never gonna not want him” 

Rhodey could see something different in Tony’s eyes. A good different. 

Tony continued “I’m keeping him and I don’t care what you or Pepper or anyone else thinks of it. I can do this” 

Rhodey saw something in Tony that he never saw before and never expected to ever see in him but he knew that Tony was keeping his son and he could see the love he had for him. “Alright, Tony. If you know you can do this and you want to them I’m gonna support that and I’m gonna be here for you” 

Tony nodded his head thankfully. It was a good feeling to actually have people support him and on board with this so he didn’t feel so alone. 

“I need to go shower because I haven’t had one in over two days so can you watch him while I’m gone?” Tony asked. He normally wouldn’t leave Peter with anyone like this but he trusted Rhodey and he also smelled really bad because Peter threw up on him a few times and he needed a shower. 

Rhodey looked unsure “Um, I don’t know, Tony. I’ve never watched a baby before so-“ 

“All you need to do is hold him for like thirty minutes then I’ll come back and take him from you” Tony explained and made his way over to the couch. “Sit down” 

“What if he cries or needs a diaper change?” Rhodey asked. He wasn’t about to change a diaper just yet. Or ever. 

“I’ll only be thirty minutes so you don’t have to worry about any of that” Tony looked down at Peter who was slowly shutting his eyes “He’s about to fall asleep anyways” 

Rhodey gave in and held out his arms for Tony to place Peter into them. Once Peter was fully in his arms he made a noise but didn’t start crying which both men were grateful for. Rhodey felt how light and small Peter was which was a crazy feeling because he realized that this was in fact his best friends kid. This was Tony’s son. 

“I’ll be right back” Tony told him “You’re doing fine” 

As Tony went to go take a quick shower he felt this weird feeling about leaving his son. Even though it’s only been a few days since Peter came into his life Tony had spent every one of those days with Peter so it was kinda weird to leave him right now. 

Rhodey on the other hand realized how Tony fell in love with Peter. He was so small and precious and something about holding him in your arms made you feel like you were meant to protect him from the world. Like you were meant to protect him from anything that could hurt him. 

It didn’t take long for Peter to notice that it wasn’t his dad who was holding him and in fact some stranger so he started crying. Loud. 

Tony was used to that cry but not Rhodey so he started getting anxious and wanted Tony to come back right now just so Peter could start crying. 

Thankfully it didn’t take long for Tony to come out of the shower and when he did he immediately rushed over to Peter and took him from his best friends arms and held him close to his chest. Peter almost immediately stopped crying and Rhodey thought that that was absolutely amazing for Peter to recognize who his dad was like that. 

Rhodey stood up and patted Tony on the back “Looks like he just wanted his dad” 

Tony didn’t say anything but nod his head. He hid his smile in Peter’s head even though there wasn’t much to hide it because his head was so small and he didn’t have a lot of hair just yet. He’s pretty sure that Rhodey saw his smile but thankfully didn’t say anything. 

“I gotta get going, Tony, but it was nice to meet your son...” Rhodey paused and smiled “that sounds so weird to say. I’m proud of you, Tones” 

“Yeah, Uh, thanks” Tony smiled openly now at his best friend. 

“I’ll try and come by again some time this week” Rhodey called out to Tony before he turned and left. Tony watched him leave but not for long because Peter was stealing his attention again. 

“What’s up, Petey?” Tony asked him not expecting an answer “How about we order you some baby stuff” 

Tony sat down on the couch and placed Peter on his chest so that he was holding him comfortably with one hand and the other hand was controlling the keypad on his computer so he could order a bunch of stuff that he needed for Peter. 

Peter ended up falling asleep as Tony ordered everything that he thought he needed for now. He ordered a bunch of diapers and wipes and diaper rash creams because at the rate he’s going through them right now he’s gonna have to buy a whole diaper store. He bought a bunch of new baby outfits that mostly include baby onesies, pyjamas and soft clothes that Peter will be comfortable in. He also ordered a crib for Tony’s room so he can keep Peter next to his bed at night. A high chair for feeding but Tony didn’t think he would need one just yet because Peter’s still too small. He bought a car seat which took a lot of research to get the best of the best and then the stuff he needed for Peter’s bedroom that he was gonna spend the next week putting together. 

He also ordered more stuff that he saw on baby websites like a changing table and baby swings for Peter. 

Tony could not wait to put together his sons bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So as for right now I’m writing this fic day by day but obviously I’m not gonna write that for the whole fic because that would be about 1000 chapters so for now that’s how it’s gonna go and I’m not quite sure yet but then it’s gonna skip into the future a few months with a few chapters there then skip a few more months or years. I have soooooooo many ideas on what to write when Peter is around 2, 4, 6 and like 9, 14 so I’m really really excited for that!!!


	5. Another chapter in the book

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried so hard to get this out on Friday but I’ve been really busy!!!! Ahhh I got a job and I’m sooo excited omg:) I actually went for the job interview on Friday morning and got it so yaayyy finally!

Tony didn’t want to say that he was proud of himself for building all of Peter’s furniture that got dropped off at his house but he was proud of himself. 

He was able to multitask between watching his two month old son and build a crib at the same time. As well as a changing table, a rocking chair and a bunch of other stuff that required building. 

Some stuff was still too big for Peter to use just yet like the high chair and one of the car seats that Tony accidentally bought instead of the ones that face backwards. 

Tony was sitting in the living room while Peter laid in a swing that Tony built for him, sucking on his pacifier. 

Peter was watching Tony with wide brown eyes like Tony was the most interesting thing in the world. Tony assumed that to Peter, he was the most interesting thing in the world. Since he was the one who was always there for Peter since the day at the hospital. 

Tony paused the other swing that he was building to move closer to Peter and press a kiss to his cheek, causing the baby to giggle. 

“Hi Mr, what are you doing?” Tony asked not expecting an answer. Peter continued to look at him and suck on his pacifier. “Hmmm, that's very interesting. Well, I’m building you another swing, see this one swings from side to side instead of back and forth” 

Tony held the instructions up in front of Peter for him to see but he didn’t pay any attention since he was too busy looking at his dads face. 

“When you’re older you can help me build some stuff” Tony said. He poked Peter in the stomach gently. He loved the way his tiny belly felt. He was so in love with his son it was unreal. 

Tony then got back to working on building Peter’s swing. 

After he was done, which didn’t take that long since he was Tony Stark. He loved building things and he was really good at it. Tony picked up all the plastic and dangerous pieces off the floor so Peter wouldn’t accidentally eat something he shouldn’t. 

Although the only thing Peter was eating right now was milk, or drinking right now, so Tony didn’t think Peter would try and eat something solid but better safe than sorry. 

Tony picked Peter up from his swing and held him so that his tiny body rested on Tony’s chest as he held him with one under his butt and the other on his back for support. He carried Peter into the kitchen to get his bottle ready for lunch time, there wasn’t really lunch time for Peter, more like eating all the time time. 

Just as Tony was about to get his bottle ready, his phone rang so he placed the powdered milk on the counter so he could answer the phone. 

“Hey, Pep” Tony put his phone on speaker so he could make Peter’s bottle before he got moody. 

“How’s it going?” Pepper asked. She was supposed to come back yesterday but she got help up and didn’t know when she was coming back to Miami. 

“Good. I’m making Pete a bottle right now” Tony finished making the bottle for Peter and then grabbed the phone and the bottle in one hand so he could go sit down to feed Peter. 

“That’s good. I can’t wait to see the little guy” Pepper cooed. “So, I have one more meeting to go to then I’ll be on the next flight to Miami so I’ll be there around six or seven tonight” 

Tony sat down and placed Peter so that he was comfortably cradled in his arms as he spoke “Alright, we’re excited to see you, aren’t we, Pete?” 

Peter started to whine so Tony places the bottle in his mouth. Pepper could hear what was going on on the other side of the phone and she smiled. “I’m excited to see him too” 

“Hey! And what about me?” Tony said pretending he was hurt. He kinda was. 

“I’ll see you two soon.” Tony could hear the teasing in Pepper’s voice “Goodbye, Mr. Stark” 

“Bye, Ms. Potts” Tony smiled to himself and hung up the phone, placing it on the couch next to him. 

He lifted Peter up more in his arms so that it would cause less gas in Peter afterwards. Tony liked learning new things every single day with Peter. It was like this new experience for him but he loves it. He loves Peter more than anything in this entire world, the things he would do for Peter and it hasn’t even been a week since his baby boy came into his life. 

Tony wouldn’t want to have it any other way. 

.  
.  
.

By the time Pepper came back, Tony was in the kitchen washing Peter’s bottles while Peter sucked on his pacifier and watched his dad while he swung in his swing that Tony recently built for him. 

Tony found out today that Peter fell asleep in the swing that rocked him side to side but the swing that rocked him back and forth helped him calm down whenever Tony had to put him down for something such as washing his bottles. 

Pepper walked in and saw the scene going down in the kitchen. “What’s going on in here?”

Tony turned around the best he could while he was hands deep in dish soap “Hey, oh, this. Peter’s quite demanding so I had to drag his swing in here while I washed his bottles” 

Pepper took in everything that was going on. Tony Stark is actually washing dishes while his son swings in a new swing that wasn’t there when Pepper left a few days ago. 

She then looked around at all the other new baby stuff that was in the kitchen and living room. She was amazed that Tony did all of this by himself. “You build all this?” 

Tony gave Pepper a fake dirty look “What? You’re surprised that I built a crib?” 

Pepper placed her hands on her hip and eyed Tony “No, I’m surprised you watched Peter and built a crib” 

Tony laughed but just as he was about to say something back to her, she was bending down so she could look at Peter. “Hi, Peter. How are you doing?” 

“He can’t talk yet, you know” Tony told her. She turned around to give him a dirty look but his back was to them. 

“Oh, like you haven’t been talking to him non stop while I was gone” Pepper shot back, playfully. She undid the straps that were holding Peter in a picked him up in her arms. “Hi there, baby boy. Look at you” 

She held Peter up in the air then cradled him close to her chest and leaned against the counter. Tony finished the last bottle then looked over at Pepper and Peter. “Like his outfit? It reminds me of something you’d wear” 

“Are you saying you dressed your son in girl clothes?”

“I’m saying you dress like a boy” 

Pepper looked at Tony with a hurt look on her face so Tony held up his arms in defense “What? I’m sorry! I take that back” 

Pepper eyed Tony for a few more seconds before turning her attention back towards Peter. He was dressed in a white onesie that had a bunch of red cars on it. “Hmm, he looks bigger since I last saw him” 

“What? That was four days ago” Tony eyes Peter now. There was no way he could have grown in four days. Right? “Don’t say that. He can’t get bigger” 

“Babies grow fast, Tony.” Pepper said “Next week he won’t even fit in this onesie” 

Tony went to grab Peter back from Pepper but she moved away “Hey! I haven’t seen him in four days. Let me hold your son” 

“Stop hogging him, he’s mine” Tony shot back. He actually didn’t mind at all that Pepper was holding Peter since it was nice to have her back but also that meant more help. 

Although Tony still loved spending time with just Peter and him. 

They walked towards the living room and sat down on the couch. Pepper sighed happily. She lifted Peter up so that he was laying on the couch between Tony and her as she gently rubbed his stomach. 

“Want to help me paint his bedroom?” Tony asked. He planned on painting it later tonight just because he was dying to get to it. It was so exciting. 

“You’re making him a bedroom?” Pepper looked up from Peter and at Tony confused. 

Tony looked away from her. He turned his attention on Peter and rubbed a gentle hand over his soft brown baby hair. Peter was still pretty much bald but he had some peach fuzz for hair. 

“Yeah, he’s gonna need somewhere to sleep when he’s older” Tony knew he would still be sleeping with Peter in his room for quite some time still so there was no rush but he wanted to settle things and put together his sons bedroom. 

“Did you get everything for his room already?” Pepper asked. 

“Yeah, mostly everything I think” Tony ordered everything that he could think of but he could still build on it if they needed to get something else. 

Pepper smiled lovingly at Tony. “I’d love to help” 

Tony didn’t expect her to actually help since he was always the one with the crazy ideas and the one that would actually carry on with those crazy ideas. Not that putting together his sons room was a crazy idea but Tony just didn’t expect Pepper to help. He was glad she was though. 

Pepper leaned more towards Peter and smelt him. She then looked up at Tony and made a face. 

“He smells” Pepper said. 

Tony looked down at Peter and back up at Pepper. Of course he smelt, he constantly had a diaper on and those things smelt. 

“He probably just needs his diaper change” Tony leaned over and grabbed a diaper from one of the many boxes that were lying around the house “Do you want to do the honours?” 

Pepper rolled her eyes but grabbed the diaper anyways “I don’t think he went poo. When was the last time you gave him a bath?” 

Then the realization hit Tony. He never gave Peter a bath. “Oh shit. Shit. Fuck” 

Pepper was getting concerned now too “What? What’s wrong?” 

Tony stood up and ran his hands through his hair. What the fuck was wrong with him, he thought to himself. He never even considered giving his son a bath. For four days. What the fuck! 

“I never gave Peter a bath” Tony admitted. “Not once. It-it didn’t even cross my mind-“ 

“Hey, relax” Peter started getting scared and whining a bit so Pepper tried to relax Tony “you’re scaring Peter, he can sense that you’re stressed” 

Tony looked down at Peter on the couch and picked him up in his arms. He cradled him to his chest and pressed a kiss to his soft head. “I’m so sorry, Petey. I’m so sorry. I didn’t even give you a bath” 

Pepper stood up as well and placed a comforting hand on Tony’s back “It's not your fault. New parents are trying to get used to things they’ve never done before. Such as give another person a bath” 

Tony looked down at Peter in his arms, he felt horrible for what he did, or what he didn’t do. It wasn’t fair to Peter. This helpless innocent baby boy couldn’t do anything for himself yet and that made Tony sick to his stomach because he was the one that was supposed to watch his baby. He was the one that was supposed to live him and make sure that he was okay and he failed at doing that. He failed his son. It hasn’t even been a full week and he failed his son already. 

Pepper saw that look on Tony’s face so she patted his back again and gave him a gentle smile “Let’s go give him a bath now. It’s honestly okay, Tony. It’s not a big deal” 

Tony didn’t think so “It is a big deal because he smells and he probably has some type of rash or infection all because I forgot to care for him properly” 

Pepper sighed but lead Tony into the bathroom anyways “He does not have an infection and there’s diaper rash creams for that stuff. If he needs it” 

Tony didn’t say anything. They went into his bedroom and then into the bathroom. Tony stood there while Pepper looked around the bathroom for something to use to wash Peter with. She began filling the bath at the right temperature and waited for it to fill up a few inches before placing a towel into the bath on the bath ground. 

Tony watched on confused and then Pepper explained as if she read his thoughts “I put the towel there so that it’s softer on him and he doesn’t slip. I’m gonna go get my shampoo because I use a gentle one that will work for him” 

Tony looked between the bathroom door and the bath “Okay…” 

“Undress him while I’m gone” Pepper said before leaving them. 

Tony placed Peter on the bathroom rug so he could undress him. As soon as Peter’s diaper was off he started crying so Tony picked him up again and held him in his arms until Pepper got back. 

Peter felt even more fragile without any clothes on and it made Tony scared to hold him like this. The only time Peter was fully naked like this was when he was changing his diaper and putting on new clothes but he never picked Peter up like this when he had on nothing, not even a diaper. 

Pepper walked back into the bathroom, much to Tony’s relief. She had baby shampoo as well as more towels. 

“It’s his first bath with you so you should be the one to give it to him” Pepper smiled. She sat down on the bathroom floor next to the bath. “I’m just here for support” 

Tony smiled nervously at her and got onto his knees so he could place Peter in the bath. He held onto his head but slid his hand out from under his butt so he could keep him above the water. 

Pepper grabbed a washcloth, soaking it in the warm water then placing it on Peter’s chest and stomach so he would stay warm. 

Peter made a face of annoyance as if he was about to start screaming but then he relaxed a bit and started moving his hands and legs in the water the best he could. 

“Do you like the water, Petey?” Tony cooed. He moved his hand so that he was holding Peter in a more comfortable position. Peter responded by kicking his legs and arms again. 

Pepper grabbed a new washcloth and soaked it then put some baby soap on it to start washing Peter. She handed it to Tony “I’ll hold his head up while you wash his body” 

They switched positions then Tony slowly started lifting Peter’s arms and legs up one by one so he could clean everywhere before cleaning between his legs, making sure that there were no rashes or anything like that. Thankfully there wasn’t any which was a good thing. 

“I’m gonna gently wash his head a bit and his face” Pepper said which Tony was grateful because he didn’t think he had soft enough hands to do that part of the cleaning. At least not yet. 

Once Tony and Pepper were done cleaning Peter and playing with him a bit in the bath, Pepper pulled out her phone to take a few pictures “Look at me, boys. Peter’s first bath time” 

After pictures were taken, Tony lifted Peter out of the bath and placed him in a towel that Pepper laid out for him. He then wrapped him up the best he could and carried him into his bedroom, placing him on the bed. 

“You now have to order a baby bath and some more baby safe soaps for him,” Pepper said. She sat on the bed next to where Peter was lying down so she could watch Tony get him in his pyjamas, even though all his clothes were pyjamas. 

“I’ll do that tonight because I’m not gonna go another four days without giving my son a bath” Tony said in a joking tone but he was far from joking. 

“He’s probably gonna go a lot longer than that when he’s a teenager without bathing” Pepper joked. She actually didn’t know if that was true or not since she didn’t know a lot about boys, especially teenage ones. 

“I won’t let him do that, even if I have to drag him into a bath myself” The thought of Peter being a teenager was weird to think about. It was many many years away yet at the same time it seemed so close. It also made Tony really happy to think about because this was his son. This was his baby that he was gonna raise. 

Tony couldn’t get the smile off his face even after he unwrapped Peter from the towel and a stream of pee went onto him. 

Pepper immediately started laughing while Tony stood there in shock. He had never had that happen before. He had just gotten peed on. Peter just peed on him! 

As much as it was disgusting, Tony didn’t seem to care because Peter was safe and apparently happy since he was laughing and giggling at the whole ordeal. 

“You think this is funny, Peter? Huh?” Tony joked. Peter was done peeing now but he was still giggling the best he could. By giggling, it was just a little smile that appeared on Peter’s lips and a cute sound that was coming out of him. 

“Well, first time getting peed on then” Pepper teased. “And on the first time you gave him a bath” 

Tony gave her a fake dirty look as he put some diaper rash cream on Peter to prevent any rash from happening and putting on a clean diaper. He then decided on a full on white onesie that had a bee on the butt for Peter’s pyjamas before picking him up and holding him safe in his arms. 

“I’m gonna feed him and get him to sleep then we can start with his bedroom” Tony told Pepper as they made their way into the kitchen. 

Pepper watched Tony multitask while he held Peter with one arm and used the other arm to make him a bottle. She was proud of him for everything he’s done for Peter in these last four days and she couldn’t wait to see how he made her proud with Peter in the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like this!! I really want to spend more time on this fic but it’s hard when I have like 500 other fics so sorry if the updates are off! I’m trying to get a chapter out every Friday! 
> 
> I have a question for you guys: ok so do you want me to write a lot of chapters with Peter as a new born like this and Tony living life with a new born or do you want me to move onto the next stage in Peters life now? I will be making about 1-3 more chapters of new born Peter either way.


	6. I’ll fight for you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii guys:) I have no idea where the time went because I didn’t even realize that the last tile I uploaded was at the beginning of the month!!! Whatttt!! Anyways, I’m also sorry that this chapter is really short but I’m sick right now and I feel awful so the ending of this chapter might be a little wacky, I just wanted to post something:) enjoy

“What colour did you pick out?” Pepper asked Tony as he was changing into an old T-shirt. He had just put Peter in his crib that he had finished building and left the crib outside of Peter’s bedroom so they could still see and hear him if he needed them but he wasn’t in the room that was about to be painted. 

“Yellow” Tony said. He had been deciding on a blue or green that would be perfect for a baby boys room but then Tony thought about the fact that he didn’t want to raise his son making his son think that he had to follow boys typical stereotypes. He wanted Peter to be his own person and if that meant him liking the colour pink, playing with dolls and doing ballet then Tony would be more than happy to support his son. 

Pepper grabbed one of the paint cans from Tony and pried it open with a screwdriver. She looked inside and hummed. “Hmm, I like it. It’s a...gentle colour” 

Tony opened his can with a screwdriver as well and looked inside. “Yeah, do you think he’ll like it when he gets older?” 

Pepper looked over at Tony with a serious look on her face. “I know he’ll love it, Tony, because you were the one who painted his room” 

Tony bit his lip to try and stop the smile that was forming. “I’m not doing it on my own. Take about… twelve percent of the credit” 

“Twelve percent?” Pepper asked, pretending she was mad. “I think that only leaves me now to only paint… twelve percent of the room” 

Tony couldn’t hold back his smile now. “Okay, maybe an argument can be made for let’s say fifty percent. I paint this half and you paint that half. Meet in the middle” 

“Hmm, you have a deal Mr. Stark” Pepper held out her hand for Tony to shake. 

They then got to work on painting Peter’s nursery. At first Tony found it kinda hard to balance out how much paint to put on the wall so it didn’t drip down but he eventually got the hang of it. 

Soon they started talking together about anything and everything, Tony found it almost relaxing if he was being honest. The safety that Pepper provided whenever she was around, amazes Tony. 

He knows that he should be the one to make her feel that way, he wasn’t sure if he did and he was definitely not about to ask but she definitely made him feel that way. Something about her presence was comforting and it always was. 

They’ve known each other for almost a year now and ever since the first day they met she gave Tony that feeling of… safety and comfort. 

It wasn’t until one morning, well one afternoon he woke up from one of his many one night stands feeling like shit. His head was killing him no doubt from all the alcohol he drank the night before and his stomach felt awful but the minute Pepper walked into his bedroom and yelled at him to go to a meeting he felt… better. As if her presence alone was the thing that made him feel better even if she was yelling at him. 

Then after that, Tony started sleeping with more women and drinking more alcohol just so he stopped feeling that way around Pepper. He couldn’t develop feelings for her, so he had to stop that. Even if it meant becoming an alcoholic, but he already was one. 

Tony was interrupted from his thoughts when him and Pepper were meeting at their breaking point of meeting in the middle. He looked over at her and couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across his face. 

He stopped his painting to lean in closer to her, not really knowing what he was planning on doing when Peter let out a loud whine. Tony stood up straighter and looked at his hands to see if he had any paint on him. 

“You go get him,” Pepper pushed him gently towards the door “I’ll finish this bit here” 

Tony pauses and looked at Pepper taking in his beautiful she is before turning around and going to see what was wrong with Peter. 

He looked inside the crib and saw that Peter was making his poop face so he gently picked him up and held him against his chest so he could go change him. 

Tony brought him over to the couch and grabbed a blanket to change him on, he knew he should have changed him on a proper changing mat but he wanted to change him as fast as possible so he could get back to Pepper. 

It wasn’t a very messy poop so Tony didn’t take that long to change him. He picked Peter back up and went back to the nursery to see how Pepper was getting on. 

Pepper was just finishing up by the time Tony walked in. She finished the last strip as she looked at Tony holding his son. “How is he?” 

“He just needed his diaper changed. Looks good in here, although my side looks a lot better” Tony joked, but not really because his side did look a lot better. 

Pepper placed down the paint roller and glared at Tony. “What?! It does not!” 

“What do you think, Pete? Do you like your new bedroom?” Tony asked Peter but obviously didn’t receive an answer. 

Pepper smiled at the two and stepped towards them. She pressed a gentle kiss to Peter’s head and smiled up at Tony then looked at the nursery. “Maybe you’re right. Your side does look better” 

“Oh come on now,” Tony teased “don’t beat yourself up over it. Peter’s gonna love it” 

Pepper slapped him playfully on his arm then leaned into him a bit that sent butterflies into Tony’s stomach. It took everything in him not to put his arm around her. 

“I’m proud of you, you know.” Pepper admitted randomly. “You painted his room and built all his furniture without paying anybody to do it” 

Tony didn’t even consider paying someone to do all that for him just because he is more than capable of doing all that himself. Although now that he thinks about it, he could have easily paid someone to do all this for him, he could also pay someone to watch Peter and take care of him so he doesn’t have to but he doesn’t want that. Tony wants to be there for his son and that includes painting his room yellow and building his cribs and high chairs. 

“Yeah. With your help of course” Tony tried to change the subject so he didn’t get emotional which Pepper knew so she didn’t argue with it. 

“Now all we have to do is wait about a day for the paint to dry before we move all the furniture into his room” Pepper walked out of the nursery with Tony following behind her. 

He was gonna drag the crib into the living room but he decided against it, he could hold Peter while he slept. Besides, Peter likes it better when he’s being held anyways. 

Pepper sat down on the couch and pulled out her phone, Tony knew she was going through her emails which she usually did when she had a free minute. Tony knew it was her job but he still felt annoyed that she wasn’t using her free time to sit and talk with him. 

Tony was content to hold Peter on his chest, feeling his tiny chest rise and fall with each breath he was taking. Tony couldn’t even comprehend how much love he has for Peter even in the few days that he’s known him. 

He was excited for many more memories to come and when Peter was old enough for Tony to teach him a bunch of new things. 

Pepper looked up from her phone and broke Tony out of his thoughts about the future as he looked at his son on his chest. “Tony, we need to talk about something” 

That got Tony’s attention. He looked over at Pepper and noticed the worried look on her face. “About what?” 

“About Obadiah” Pepper started. “We have to tell him about Peter because now that you have a son, you’re not going to be fully invested in the company” 

Tony rolled his eyes. This was nothing new. “Tell Obi that nothing’s gonna change. It’s not like I was fully invested in the company before Peter anyways. Now I have a reason not to be” 

“Tony, you still have to run the company, just talk to Obadiah and discuss things with him” Pepper tried to reason. She knew that Tony was impossible to talk to when it involved him having to get work done. 

“Tell him to come by tomorrow then he can meet Peter and we’ll talk” Tony suggested. He didn’t like the idea of someone coming by to meet Peter unless it was Pepper or Rhodey but he trusts Obadiah so he wouldn’t mind him coming to meet his son. 

.

.

.

“We should put the crib so it’s more against the wall instead of the middle of the room” Tony suggested. He was holding Peter with one arm while he was helping Pepper drag the crib into the nursery. 

Peter wouldn’t be sleeping in here for at least a few more weeks, maybe months but Tony wanted things to be perfect for his son. 

“Well this way we can put his changing table by the window” Pepper argued. She knew how she wanted Tony’s kids nursery to look but Tony had the ugliest design for it ever. 

To be fair both of the adults were annoyed. Peter had woken up over ten times last night demanding things and when Tony had enough of it he dragged Pepper into his bedroom and told her to change the screaming baby so he could go make a fresh bottle. 

“The window?! I don’t want perverts watching me change my son’s diaper outside” Tony hated that idea. Nothing would be going by the window so no one could see in. He didn’t want no one looking at his son. 

“No one can see in, Tony. Well, we’ll just put the changing table here then” Pepper then dragged the table over to the other wall across from the crib. 

After about another hour, Peter’s nursery was done. 

Tony loves it. He couldn’t wait for Peter to be old enough to bring all his toys in here and make a mess of it. 

They finished just in time for Obadiah to walk into the house. 

Pepper went to greet him and bring him into the living room while Tony quickly changed Peter’s diaper and put him in a blue onesie. 

“Hey, Obi! What a pleasant surprise to see you here” Tony greeted as he walked towards the living room with Peter in his arms. Both Pepper’s and Obadiah's heads were facing away from him. 

“What a surprise it was for me to have Pepper call me up saying you requested a meeting with me at your house-” Obadiah stopped talking and his eyes went wide as he turned around and saw Tony walking into the room holding a tiny baby. “What on earth is that?!” 

“Obi, meet Peter. My son” 

“Tony, what? Are you serious or is this some kind of joke?! You can’t have a son!” Obadiah stood up and walked towards Tony, looking at the small baby in his arms. 

“Oh Obi. A little late on the talk where you tell me I can’t raise a kid then I say I can and we fight some more” Tony sighed. “I’ve already had that talk from um, lets see, Pepper and Rhodey” 

“Rhodey knows about this?” Obadiah asked as if he was offended that Rhodey knew before he did. 

“Yep. Jealous? He’s my best friend not you, although you do make a great business partner” Tony shrugged his shoulders and then moved to sit beside Pepper on the couch. 

“I’m more than just your business partner, Tony. We work together and run a multi billion dollar company” Obadiah tried to argue but Tony was getting annoyed. 

“Then for once just… be on my side for something. Pete’s my son and I’m keeping him. I honestly don’t give a fuck what you have to say about it” At what Tony said, Obadiah took a step back, surprised that Tony would even talk to him that way. 

Obadiah stayed silent for a few seconds before speaking. “Alright, Tony. If you think you want to raise a child then go for it, I’ll support you” 

“I know I can raise my child” Tony shot back. He was starting to regret having Obadiah over. 

“Okay. I support your decision” Obadiah then smiled warmly at Tony and moved to sit beside him. “Can I hold him?” 

Tony thought about it for a few seconds but then he slowly and gently placed Peter into Obadiah's arms. Something about leaving Peter in the man's arms made him feel weird and so did Peter because as soon as Peter saw that it wasn’t his dad that was holding him anymore, he started to cry. 

Tony was grateful that Peter started crying since now Tony had an excuse to get Peter out of the man's arms. 

After Peter was back in his dad's arms, he immediately stopped crying so Tony took this as his opportunity to get Obadiah out of his house. “Well, I gotta put my kid to bed so I’ll see you at some point in the next month” 

“Better not be that long, Tony” Obadiah warned but Tony was already making his way upstairs to put Peter to sleep. 

A few minutes later, Pepper walked into the bedroom and sat on the bed. “He’s gone and I have to leave soon too, I have meetings in New York” 

Tony tried not to show that he was upset. He liked having Pepper around, she was also really good with Peter and one of the few people that he trusts with his son. 

“Are you gonna be fine with him alone?” Pepper asked. She knew Tony could do it but she wanted to hear him say it. 

“Always. He’s my kid, Pep” Tony said. Saying that still made him get butterflies in his stomach because he’s a dad. Peter is his son and he couldn’t be more happy about that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m soooo excited to be moving onto the next stage of Peter’s life after this chapter!!! Hmmm what age will we get next?! Edit: I realized I was spelling Obi as Oby so I went and fixed it all, I hope I got it


	7. First steps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii guys!! I’m sorry for taking so long to update, I’ll try to post another chapter next week and this one is probably the shortest chapter I have ever written so I’m sorry for that too but please read end notes:)

Tony has no idea what happened to the time.

He had no idea how his baby was already ten months old. Time was passing by way too quickly. 

He was sitting at the kitchen table while he fed Peter some chopped up apples and thinking about how just a few months ago his baby was too small to sit in his high chair so he had to hold him in his arms and feed him. 

Now, Peter was placing some of the apples in his mouth without the help from Tony. He was missing his mouth by a lot but he was still trying his best. 

“Pete, stop moving your face so I can help you eat” Tony said tiredly. He didn’t remember the last time he got a full night's rest. Peter was supposed to start sleeping through the whole night months ago but he still wasn’t. 

At least two times Peter was waking up in the middle of the night and was crying but won’t stop until Tony picks him up and rocks him back to sleep. 

Tony is convinced that Peter is just playing him and that’s all it is. 

Like now, Peter would rather get the food all over his face as supposed to in his mouth while he found it amusing. 

“All done?” Tony asked. Peter nodded his head and began to clap his hands so Tony grabbed a wet washcloth and quickly wiped Peter’s face and hands clean before unbuckling him from his high chair and lifting him out of it. 

He carried Peter into the living room and placed him on his favourite playmat so he could play with his toys while he cleaned up the kitchen quickly. 

Tony finished as fast as he could so he could go back to hanging out with his boy. He sat down on the couch and half watched Peter, half watched the tv that was playing one of Peter’s favourite cartoons. 

Tony barely registered what was happening on the corner of his eye as Peter used his leg to help him stand up. 

He looked down and felt his eyes widen as he saw his son actually standing up all by himself. Tony could not believe what was happening. 

Peter had been crawling everywhere around the house but he never made any move to stand up and try to walk. Tony tried so hard to help Peter start walking and take his first steps but it never happened. 

Until now. 

“You got this, Petey! Come on!” Tony cheered his son on. He refused to help him because he wanted Peter to take his first steps on his own so it really counts. 

Peter was standing on shaky chubby legs as he continued to grip Tony’s leg for support. He started screaming in excitement as he began bouncing on his legs but he fell onto his butt. 

Tony waited for Peter to start crying but he didn’t. To Tony’s surprise, Peter managed to stand up again. This time he was using the couch for support as Tony moved to stand away from Peter in hopes that Peter would try and walk towards him. 

Tony kneeled by the tv and held out his arms for Peter. “Come to me, Petey. You can do it!” 

Peter looked over at Tony and continued to scream with excitement. He bounced on his chubby legs again but this time he didn’t tumble over. Tony patiently waited for Peter to start moving towards him. 

It took another few minutes but eventually Peter started taking slow and careful steps towards him. Tony felt like crying, he was so happy that his baby was walking. Peter was actually walking and all on his own. 

“You can do it, come on, buddy! Come to daddy, Pete!” Tony continued to say. Peter let go of the couch feeling confident with himself as he took three wobbly steps towards Tony but then lost his balance and fell on his butt with a thud. 

“You did it, baby! You took your first steps!” Tony looked at the smile on his baby’s face and waited for him to get on his hands and knees and start crawling over to him. He wasn’t walking over to him but that would come eventually and Tony just couldn’t believe that Peter took his first steps today. 

Once Peter was in arms reach, Tony picked him up and held his baby in his arms. “My baby boy. Pete, you’re growing up too fast” 

Peter only babbled to him in response as spit fell him his mouth and onto Tony’s lap. Tony could care less about that because Peter has covered him in a lot of other bodily fluids over these last few months although Tony wouldn’t trade it for the world. 

.  
.  
.

Over the next month, Peter stood up on his feet any chance he could get. 

Tony knew that by his first birthday Peter would be walking around everywhere. 

Peter fell on his butt once again but got right back up and continued to try and walk over to Tony who was folding Peter’s clothes on his bed. Peter had been crawling around his bedroom but then seemed to remember that he could actually walk so he stood up on chubby legs and tried to walk over to Tony. 

Tony smiled at his son and noticed that his diaper was extremely full and that was definitely the thing that was throwing his kid off balance. 

He finished folding the rest of Peter’s clean clothes and leaned down to pick his son up and set him on his hip. Peter tried to pull at Tony’s hair but Tony used his other hand to stop Peter from doing that. 

He wasn’t sure why that was Peter’s new thing to do. 

Tony shut the bathroom door and continued to hold Peter in his arms as he started a bath for him. 

Bath time was either Peter’s favourite time or his least favourite thing in the world. That meant that Tony was always so scared about giving his kid a bath because he either had a blast and it was fun or Peter threw a fit and in that case it was not fun. 

Tony was pretty confident that tonight was going to be a fun bath time considering how happy Peter seems right now. 

Tony placed Peter on the bathroom door after he started whining and squirming to be placed down. 

The bath was filled up but Tony didn’t want to place the bath seat in for Peter because he could sit up by himself now plus he would be with him for the whole time anyways. 

“Time for your bath, Pete” Tony said as he picked Peter up and undid his diaper straps before pulling it from between his legs and tossing it in the garage. He then picked Peter up before he could crawl away and sat him down in the bath. 

Peter started splashing around in the water and trying to eat Tony’s hand every time Tony tried to clean his body with a washcloth.

“Don’t eat my hand, Petety” Tony laughed as he poked Peter on his stomach which caused the baby to let out a loud giggle which was Tony favourite sound in the world. 

Tony was rinsing his hands from the baby soap in the bath when Peter slowly and carefully grabbed onto the bathtub edge to stand up. 

Tony looked over at him just in time to watch Peter come to a standing position and started bouncing on his feet while he giggled at Tony. 

“Look at you, Peter! You’re standing up in the bath, buddy!” Tony said excitedly. He held his hand behind Peter’s back just in case he lost his balance because that would not be a pretty fall. 

Peter continued to squeal excitedly but after a few minutes he lost his balance and fell back so Tony caught him and gently lowered his baby back into a sitting position. 

Tony quickly finished up with Peter’s bath time since he could tell that Peter was getting tired and he wanted Peter in a diaper and his pyjamas before he fell asleep in his bath. 

He lifted Peter out and laid him on a towel on the bathroom floor before drying him, wrapping him up and holding him in his arms. Tony carried Peter wrapped up in his towel all the way to his bedroom which wasn’t far from his own room. 

He laid Peter out on his changing table and applied diaper rash cream to him bum and front part before putting a diaper on him. Peter only started whining when Tony began to put his onesie on because Peter absolutely hated wearing clothes but Tony didn’t want him to just be sleeping in his diaper so it was necessary. 

Tony lifted Peter up in his arms and rocked him back and forth gently to help his baby boy fall asleep. 

As he placed Peter in his crib, he ran his thumb along his cheek and couldn’t stop the smile from forming on his face as he looked at his whole world sleeping in front of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys liked this incredibly short chapter. Ok so basically I have this huge idea for when Peter is like 4ish and that’s when this fic is gonna kinda like start following a story but until then there’s gonna be a few more short chapters like these of Peter up to age 4


	8. My baby boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii guys!! I hope everyone had a nice Christmas:) I tried to get a chapter out earlier but I honestly had no idea what to write.

“Peter, what do you want to eat for breakfast?” Tony asked. He was running late for a meeting and Peter was being rather difficult this morning. 

Peter shook his head as he walked into the kitchen and sat on the floor. “No daddy. No wan’”

Tony sighed at his kid and grabbed him some breakfast anyways. Peter would eat whether he wanted to or not. 

Tony was already having a hard day with Peter and out of all days, today was just not the day for Peter to be a ting up like this. Although it was fairly common with the toddler, Tony didn’t want it to happen today. 

Peter had insisted on wearing his pyjamas all day and wouldn’t even let Tony touch him without screaming his lungs out. 

Tony struggled to change Peter’s diaper after he woke him up this morning which resulted in hard kicks to his arm and almost to his face. 

It wasn’t all that hard considering that Peter was basically a two year old now. He was almost two, in less than a month he would be two but it was still extremely frustrating for Tony. 

He had less than an hour to get to his meeting and Tony had no one to watch Peter while he went so he planned on taking Peter to his meeting with him. 

He had no other choice, Pepper was in New York and Rhodey was god knows where in the world and it wasn’t like Tony trusted anyone else with his son. That only left one option open and that option was to take Peter with him to his meeting. 

In his pyjamas. 

Peter walked into the kitchen and lifted his arms up for Tony to pick him up. “Daddy, up.”

Tony lifted the toddler up and placed him in his high chair as he cut up a banana for Peter to eat. When Tony went to roll up his sleeves, Peter screamed at him so Tony immediately let go and took a huge sip out of his coffee. 

He had no time for that right now. 

Tony grabbed Peter’s diaper bag that he only ever used two other times. He hated carrying it but it was necessary for today. 

Tony walked around the living room and started to put a bunch of diapers into Peter’s bag, diaper rash cream, wipes and a bunch of toys for him. He then packed two bottles and his pacifier. 

Tony wished that Peter would let him change him into something that wasn’t his pyjamas that he slept in last night but Tony wasn’t about to make his toddler angry. Peter ran this house at all times but when he was angry, it was a different story. 

“Are you done?” Tony asked his kid who for some reason decided to rub his bananas all over his high chair tray. 

Peter shook his head but Tony didn’t have time to wait for he picked Peter out of his high chair ignoring the screams and kicks as he washed Peter’s hands in the sink and wiping down his face then grabbing the diaper bag and carrying Peter out the door. 

“No, daddy! No!” Peter cried out as he tried to get out of Tony’s hold. 

Tony thought about the first time Peter called him ‘daddy’. It was his first word just a few months ago and he remembers how happy he was when that was all Peter said. 

Now, Peter says a lot of words. ‘No’ being his all time his favourite. He also likes to say ‘bad’ to all of his stuffed animals as he throws them into his playpen that’s in the living room. 

Tony has no idea why Peter does it but he finds it funny and adorable either way. 

Tony was not finding anything that Peter was doing right now adorable. In fact he found it annoying and frustrating and Tony was tempted to smack Peter on the butt but he would never do that. He would never be his father. That was a promise he made to himself in the very beginning. 

“Peter, do you want your bottle?” Tony asked as he tried to get Peter to stop screaming so he could buckle him into the car seat. 

Peter shook his head as he continued to scream and squirm but Tony reached into his diaper bag and pulled out the bottle anyways. He placed it in Peter’s mouth and instantly the crying stopped as Peter started to suck on it instead. 

Tony sighed in relief as he buckled Peter into his car seat and shut the door, getting into the driver's seat and driving to his meeting. 

The car ride was short, only because Tony may have been speeding only slightly to get there on time. He knew this meeting was very important. 

He pulled into the parking lot of the building where the meeting was taking place and shut the car off before going to get Peter out of his car seat. 

Peter threw his empty bottle onto the floor of the car but Tony decided to let that go for now as he undid the buckles and held Peter in his arms. 

“No! Daddy, off!” Peter cried out. Tony was holding him at an awkward angle so Peter was able to slip out of Tony’s hold and run into the parking lot to get away from him and Tony instantly felt his heart drop into his stomach. 

“Peter!” Tony yelled as he chased Peter a few steps before he caught him by the arm and grabbed onto him tightly. “No! We do not run in parking lots like that. That was very bad, Peter. I am very mad at you.”

Tony placed Peter on his hip as he walked back to the car to shut the door and grab the diaper bag. He looked at Peter who had his lip wobbling and tears in his eyes. 

He could not have Peter crying right now. “It’s okay, Peter. Look, daddy’s not mad at you anymore, okay?”

Peter nodded his head but still looked at Tony sadly. 

Tony loved it when Peter learned how to run. He went from crawling to walking to running so fast that Tony barely had time to keep up with him. Life was going by too quickly. 

But right now, Tony would prefer if Peter wouldn’t run around everywhere. Especially since they were in a parking lot where a car wouldn’t be able to see Peter running around as if it was a playground. 

“Daddy mad?” Peter asked before he stuck his thumb in his mouth while Tony walked into the building. 

Tony was mad but not at Peter. Although Peter definitely added to the fact that he has zero patience today, he’s not mad at him. “No, baby. I’m not mad at you but can you behave today?”

Peter nodded his head but Tony knew that he wouldn’t be keeping that agreement because Peter did what he wanted and wouldn’t think twice about telling one of Tony’s business associates to shut up. 

Tony walked into the elevator with Peter on his hip, thankful that they were the only ones in there so he didn’t have to put on his fake smile just yet. 

He could tell that Peter was getting more and more cranky as time was passing so he wanted to try and get Peter to somehow fall asleep somewhere once they were in the meeting. 

The elevator doors opened and Tony walked out as he bounced Peter on his hip a bit to try and calm him down. Tony walked passed the receptionist and gave the man a slight smile and a wave but the man stopped him once he saw Peter in his arms. 

“Mr. Stark, is this your son? Hi baby” The receptionist asked and Tony tried not to roll his eyes. 

No this isn’t my son, it’s just a random kid I picked off the streets. Of course it was his son. 

“Yeah, this is Peter. I’m late for a meeting so I gotta go” Tony said as he already started walking away from the man. Tony opened up the door where everyone was waiting for him at the board meeting and immediately wanted to walk out as soon as all eyes landed on him. 

He was used to all eyes being on him but he didn’t like it when he was with Peter. So Tony quickly walked to the other side of the rectangle table and sat at the end. 

“Mr. Stark, I didn’t know we had another person joining us?” Randy said. Tony hates that man. He always thought he was the best one in the room and he wanted to punch him half the time. 

“Everyone, this is my son Peter. Peter, this is everyone.” Tony introduced the two while he dragged another chair over next to him so he could place Peter in it. 

Peter waved at everyone in the room with the hand that didn’t have his thumb in his mouth. Tony then lifted him off his lap to put him in the chair but Peter let out a loud scream and grabbed onto Tony with both hands so Tony sighed and kept his kid on his lap. 

Thirty minutes into the meeting and Peter was doing well so far. 

Tony had given him his bottle which Peter only took a few sips out of before handing it back to him. Tony could tell that Peter was enjoying watching all the new faces in the room so that seemed to keep him entertained for a bit. 

It was after those thirty minutes that were up when Peter started to get annoyed and want to do something else or move around so Tony grabbed a teddy bear out of the diaper bag and hand it to Peter as he placed Peter on the ground. 

Peter happily sat on one of Tony’s feet and started playing with his teddy bear under the table. 

Randy was in the middle of a speech when Peter stood up and tried to get his daddy’s attention. “Daddy! Daddy! Wan’ up! Daddy!”

Everyone turned to look at Tony, some with soft faces and others were giving him dirty looks. “Shh Peter. Come here.”

Tony lifted Peter up into his arms to place him on his lap but he felt that Peter needed his diaper changed so Tony stood up and grabbed the diaper bag, knowing this was going to happen eventually. 

“Where are you going, Stark?” Randy asked with annoyance to his voice. Tony rolled his eyes at him as he walked out of the room. 

“I’m going to change my kid.” At that, Tony left to go find a bathroom. 

“Daddy whe’e go?” Peter asked curiously. Tony knew his kid loved going on adventures, even if it was in their house. 

“We’re going to go find somewhere cool to change your diaper.” Tony explained with excitement so Peter wouldn’t get mad about his diaper being changed. 

“‘Dare?” Peter pointed to a table in the hallway and Tony shook his head as he passed it. Even though the floor was quiet with barely any people on it, he still didn’t want to change his kid out in the open. 

Tony pushed open the men’s bathroom and went to lay Peter on the changing table, only there was none. 

“What the…” Tony looked in each stall and he couldn’t find a changing table. There wasn’t even enough room on the counter to change Peter. 

Tony looked around the bathroom for anywhere he could change his kid but the only option was the floor and there was no way that Tony was going to do that. 

“Where am I gonna change you, Peter?” Tony asked as he exited the bathroom to find another place. He debated going into the women’s bathroom but decided against that for multiple reasons. 

“I don’ know” Peter said seriously as he looked around. Tony laughed at him because he seemed a lot older right now but the situation didn’t add up and it was funny. “‘Dare!”

Tony looked over to where Peter pointed to and saw an empty board room at the end of the hallway with no one around. The lights were off, with the only light getting in from the window. 

“Good job, Pete. It’s perfect.” Tony walked into the room and shut the door before placing Peter on his feet. “Okay, come here because we gotta be quick. Lay down.” 

Peter hurried over to Tony and was about to lay down but Tony stopped him. “Wait. This floor is dirty too so…”

Tony took off his suit jacket because he didn’t want to change Peter on this dirty floor, even if it was cleaner than the bathroom. 

Peter stepped onto the suit jacket then laid down on it while Tony quickly tugged down his pants and undid his diaper straps. 

“I help” Peter said and tried to sit up to grab the diapers out of the bag but it was only making it harder for Tony. 

“No, Peter. I got this.” Tony pushed Peter’s hands away but he immediately regretted that and now Peter wasn’t gonna let him change him so Tony quickly handed Peter another diaper. “Okay, I need you to open this for me. Can you do that?”

“Yes dada” Tony gently pushed Peter back down and then started to quickly wipe him before putting a new diaper on. Once he was done he tried to grab the diaper from Peter but Peter shook his head. “Mine!”

Tony sighed. He didn’t have time for this right now so he cleaned everything up and picked Peter up in his arms with him still holding the diaper and trying to eat it. Tony was glad it was a clean one. 

He walked back into the board room, this time he ignored all the stares he got as he sat down with Peter in his lab. 

Another hour passed by and Peter was fine to sit on Tony’s lap then to the floor then back up to Tony’s lap again before he started to get cranky so Tony cradled him in his arms as he patted his diapered butt and gave him his bottle. 

Once Peter fell asleep, the meeting ended so Tony stood up with Peter and carried his kid to his car. 

.  
.  
.

Tony was exhausted. 

He had been with Peter for one month straight with no help from anyone and it was really getting to him. He loved his son more than anything else in the world. More than he even thought it was possible to love someone but at some point even he needed a break. 

It didn’t help that Peter didn’t think the same. Peter didn’t seem to want to be away from him for longer than ten seconds. He was going through a really clingy phase and wanted Tony to either be in the same room as him or be carrying him around all the time. 

Pepper had been out of Miami for over a month now so Tony didn’t have anyone else to watch Peter for him to just for even an hour so he could have some ‘me time’. 

Tony was dying to go down to his lab to work on some stuff for Stark Industries but he only did that while Peter was having a nap time and right now, Peter refused to lie down so Tony had to improvise. 

“Wanna come down to the lab with me, baby?” Tony asked Peter who was following him around the house and dragging his teddy bear with him. 

Peter nodded his head and lifted his arms up so Tony picked him up and brought him down to the lab. 

It was hard for Tony to work while watching Peter at the same time because every time he would get invested in his work, he would worry about Peter touching something he shouldn’t and that made him lose his focus every time. 

Tony wished there was a baby monitor that could watch Peter when he couldn’t and not only listen to when Peter cries. Tony knew there were ones like that but he wanted one more advanced. 

As Tony watched Peter lie on his stomach and play with his cars and teddy bears, Tony thought about how Jarvis would watch him when he was just a little bit older than Peter was. 

He wished he had someone like Jarvis to watch Peter. That way he could get his work done and not worry about whether or not Peter was okay because he would know he was. 

That’s when Tony got an idea. 

.  
.  
.

“Boss, Peter is playing in the toilet again.” Jarvis said from the ceiling. 

Tony smiled at the ceiling as if he could actually see his A.I. “Thanks, Jarvis. What would I do without you.”

“I’m sure many amazing things, Boss.” Jarvis responded. 

Tony smiled again as he made his way into the bathroom where he found Peter sticking his hands in the toilet. 

“What do you think you’re doing, Mr?” Tony asked as he scooped the toddler up and started washing his hands in the sink. 

Peter pouted as he looked up at the ceiling. “Bad Jabis!”

Tony shook his head. “He’s not bad, he’s just on my side.” Tony smirked then placed Peter on the floor. “Don’t you be giving me or Jarvis any attitude just because it’s your second birthday tomorrow.” 

Peter crossed his arms at Tony and ran out into the living room as Tony followed him amused. 

Peter had taken an interest to Jarvis just because he was too young to understand that there wasn’t an actual human in the ceiling but rather an A.I that his daddy had invented. 

Tony couldn’t be more proud of himself for creating Jarvis. He was still working on a few things so that he was fully functional but as for right now, he did his job of helping Tony watch his kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so I had this plan to write a bunch of one shots where like Peter said his first word, first steps, first birthday. Basically a bunch of firsts for Peter but I eventually lost motivation to write those plus they would only have been like really really short so right now I have sooooo many more ideas to write for like 4-6 ish year old Peter sooooo I’m so excited and now this fic will start to follow a story so I’m really excited for you guys to read it ahh!!!


	9. How to save a life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year!! I can’t believe it’s the end of a decade and a new one is starting! 2020 ahh!! I wish everyone the best in 2020 and for you guys to accomplish all your goals:) 
> 
> I am spending my New Years by myself in my room writing which is the best way to do it:) haha well for me anyways:) 
> 
> I hope you guys like this chapter! I absolutely love it!! Also this is the first chapter I’m posting in 2020 and I’m so excited for what else I’m going to write!

“Daddy, don’t go! Stay with me!” Peter cried out. He had his arms and legs wrapped around Tony’s right leg as his dad tried to walk towards the front door of their house. 

Peter hated when his daddy left because he hated being without him and now his dad was going to be leaving for so long. 

“I’m only going to be gone for a week, Peter.” Tony sighed and lifted his four year old off the ground and held him on his hip so he could at least walk to his car. 

Happy was waiting for him outside of his house and even though Tony was going to drive himself, he still wanted Happy to drive in a separate car next to him. It was fun to race the man whenever Peter wasn’t in the car with him. 

Peter shoved his face into his father's neck and let out a loud cry. “No! I’m gonna miss you too much, daddy!” 

Tony looked over at Pepper desperately as he walked to his car with the woman following behind them. He patted his son on the back and gave him a kiss to his temple, he had no idea that this would be the last time he would be seeing his son for a very long time. 

“Daddy’s just going to be gone for a week and then I’ll come back and we can go swimming in the pool and watch movies together, sound good?” Tony held his pinky finger up to his sons much smaller one to pinky promise him he’d come home soon. “Pinky promise?”

Peter wiped his tears and held his pinky out. “Pinky promise.”

Tony then placed Peter on his feet and opened up the drivers door. “I’ll see you on Friday, baby. Be good.”

Peter tried to be brave for his daddy because he knew that his daddy didn’t want to leave either and it was hard on him too. He walked over to Pepper and raised his arms up for her. 

She hoisted the toddler onto her hip and they waved bye to Peter’s dad as he drove away. 

Little did any of them know that Tony wouldn’t be coming home. 

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.  
.

On the third day that Tony was gone, Pepper got the phone call. 

She was playing with Peter in the living room when her phone started ringing. That wasn’t odd since her phone was constantly ringing with business calls but as soon as she saw who was calling, her heart dropped into her stomach and she knew it wasn’t good. 

“I’m gonna be right back, Peter. You continue to play with bear.” Pepper patted the four year old on the head and then walked into the kitchen so she could still see Peter but he couldn’t hear her. 

She took a deep breath and answered the phone. “Hello?” 

“Pepper,” Rhodey, Tony’s best friend said into the phone. She knew that something was wrong before he even said it because Rhodey was supposed to be with Tony in Afghanistan selling Stark Industry weapons and if he was calling her then that means… “Tony’s gone.”

Pepper let out a quiet sob and covered a hand over her mouth to try and silence it. She turned away from Peter just in case he looked over at her, she didn’t want him to see. 

“What-what happened?” Pepper asked, she felt broken and numb. Peter’s dad was gone. He was gone and he wasn’t coming back and she now had to tell Tony’s four year old son that. 

“There was an explosion. We couldn’t find his body and we believe he was kidnapped.” Rhodey explained quickly. Pepper wasn’t sure where he was but it sounded like he was in a car or an airplane. “I’m doing everything I can to find him, Pep. There’s a search team out looking for him but there’s no clues as to where they took him. We don’t even know who took him.” 

Pepper heard the innuendo in Rhodey's words but she didn’t want to believe it. Tony was gone. She wouldn’t believe it. 

“What do I tell Peter? Tony’s all he has?” Pepper let out another sob. She knew that Peter had her and Rhodey and even Happy but they weren’t Tony. They weren’t Peter’s best friend who would do anything for him and who loved him more than words can describe. 

“Just… don’t tell him anything yet. Tell him that Tony’s gonna be gone for a little bit longer” Rhodey rushed out. “Look Pep, I have to go but I’ll call you if I get an update on anything.” 

Pepper hung the phone up and placed her head in her hands as she cried silently into them. It felt like her world was crashing down all around her. 

She had to now take care of Tony’s son. The one thing in this world that Tony loves more than anything else, the one thing that he gave up everything for and made him into a better person. Peter. 

“Pepper? What’s wrong?” Peter tugged on Peppers pants and she quickly wiped her tears and smiled down at Tony’s baby. 

“Hi Peter. I thought I told you to stay with your bear?” She tried to smile at Peter but she couldn’t hold back the sob that left her mouth. 

Peter, the sweet, perfect baby that he was, started to wobble his lip meaning that he was about to start crying as well. He always cried whenever her or Tony would show any signs of emotion around him, it wasn’t often for this very reason but it still happened. 

Peter felt so strongly about others and always wanted to know why they were sad and make them feel better by offering them lots of kisses and hugs. Pepper had no idea how Tony raised him to be like that but both adults were proud of him. 

“What’s wrong, Pepper? Why are you crying? Did I do something bad?” Peter asked as he looked up at her with his big brown beautiful eyes. 

Pepper leaned down in front of Peter and cupped his chubby cheeks in her hands. “No, baby. You didn’t do anything wrong.” 

Peter started playing with the buttons on her top. “But-but then why you crying?”

Pepper wasn’t sure she should tell Peter. It was unfair for her to keep this from him but she wasn’t ready to tell him yet and Peter wasn’t ready to hear it. Although, Peppers not sure Peter would ever be ready to hear that he has to live his life without his dad in it with him. 

She stood up and picked Peter up in her arms as she started walking towards the hallway bathroom. She wanted to get Peter ready for bed now so she didn’t have to keep pretending to be okay in front of him. 

“Where we goin’?” Peter asked confused. 

It was still a bit early but that was okay. “We’re going to have bath time early tonight, Peter.” 

As Pepper placed Peter on his feet so she could start the bath, Peter pointed towards the hallway. “But I always have baths in daddy’s bathroom. All my toys are in there.” 

Pepper didn’t look at Peter as she spoke. “Not tonight, Pete.” She wasn’t sure she could step foot in Tony’s bedroom right now. Maybe not ever again. 

Peter stomped his foot and crossed his arms. “No! I wan’ daddy to come back now so he can give me my bath! Not you!” 

Pepper turned away from Peter and covered her hand over her mouth as she tried not to cry. Once she gathered herself enough to trust her voice to talk, she turned around and grabbed Peter by the arm. 

“Please, Peter. Not tonight. You’re gonna have a quick bath and then you’re gonna go to bed.” Pepper knew Peter would listen to her because he was a good kid. He always hated to cause his dad any trouble so he always listened to him. Mostly always, of course Peter was still only four years old. 

The toddler nodded his head and walked closer to Pepper as she tugged down his pants and underwear and then pulled his shirt off his head and helped him into the bath. 

Bath time was always Peter’s favourite time. Him and Tony would always look forward to that time of the day and when it would come, the two would spend more time splashing one another instead of Tony actually washing Peter off. 

Now, Peter barely said a word as he let Pepper wash his body and then pull him out of the tub and wrapped him in a towel. 

She walked with him to his bedroom and pulled out dinosaur pyjamas for Peter to wear. As Pepper was helping Peter step into his pants, he sighed. “I miss daddy. When is it Friday yet?” 

Pepper focused on getting Tony’s child dressed and then helped him into the bed. “Sleep good, Peter.” 

Peter didn’t understand why Pepper was being so mean to him. Maybe it was because he didn’t eat all of his fruits at dinner time. But that wouldn’t make any sense because she was still happy even after he didn’t finish his fruits. 

He must have done something wrong after that. He didn’t know what he did but he felt bad that he did it. He was such a bad boy and now his daddy was going to be mad at him on Friday. 

Peter sighed and turned over in his bed. He wished daddy could have given him bath time tonight because Pepper was fun but she just didn’t understand how to make bath time fun like daddy. Peter just wants his daddy. 

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.  
.

As soon as Pepper put Peter to bed, she went into her bedroom and into the bathroom to cry. She tried her best not to be loud but she didn’t think that Peter would have heard her anyways. 

She didn’t know what to do. 

She was supposed to take care of Tony’s son for a week then Tony would come home and she would go back to work but now Tony wasn’t coming home and she didn’t know what to do about that. 

Peter was number one priority so she would stay with him as long as necessary but it would eventually come to a point in time when she would have to tell Peter that his daddy isn’t coming home to him. She refused to give up hope but that’s all she could think of. 

Pepper wasn’t sure if she would now be the one to raise Peter. She wasn’t sure if she was ready to do that alone. She knows that Peter needs Tony. 

Pepper continued to cry well into the night. 

She didn’t stop no matter how hard she tried. She couldn’t even remember the last time she cried so hard, not even when she found out that her best friend had drowned and tragically passed away. 

This was different. Tony was… Tony wasn’t her best friend but at the same time he was. She wasn’t sure what Tony was to her but he was something more than a best friend even if they hadn’t even kissed before. 

She always thought that Tony would try to make a move on her and try to get her in his bed but he never did. At first she was offended that Tony didn’t want to sleep with her, as if she wasn’t good enough but she then learned that Tony didn’t want to sleep with her because he didn’t want to lose what they already had. 

Besides from all the flirting that went both ways, their… friendship was innocent. 

It consisted of Tony and her staying up late after Peter goes to bed either making a mess of the kitchen together while Pepper tries and fails to teach Tony how to cook or them watching movies together on the couch. 

She smiled at the memories and then let out a sob because that’s all they were now, memories. 

Memories of Tony lifting Peter up when he runs into his arms and hugging him with so much love. Tears ran down Peppers face as she thought about how Peter was now living in a world without his dad. 

She placed her head into her hands and cried into them until way after the sun came up. 

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.  
.

Four days have passed by before Pepper had to tell Peter that his dad won’t be coming home. 

She hadn’t received any phone calls from Rhodey to tell her that they had found Tony alive and healthy and that they were bringing him home now. She had partly been expecting to get that phone call because this just doesn't seem real. It couldn’t be real. 

How is Peter going to grow up without a father. 

It’s not fair to him. It’s not fair to Pepper or to anyone who knows Tony. How are they expected to live life now without him. 

It was just past seven in the morning on Friday, the day Tony was supposed to be coming home but now Pepper had to tell Peter the truth. She knew she should have told the child four days ago but she just couldn’t. 

As Pepper sat on the couch with her head in her hands, she listened to Peter running upstairs as he most likely attempted to get dressed on his own and fell onto the floor. 

The tears left her eyes before she even got the chance to tell Peter. 

That’s when the front door opened and Pepper stood up. She quickly walked towards the door and saw Rhodey. He was shaking his head and Pepper let out another sob and wrapped her arms around herself. Tony was supposed to be with Rhodey right now. 

She didn’t know why she thought it was Tony at the door. It was stupid of her to think that. 

Rhodey tried to hug her but she didn’t let him. “Pepper, I did everything I could. I couldn’t find him. I’m not gonna give up though.” 

Pepper nodded her head and then heard more loud banging upstairs. “I-I didn’t tell Peter yet. I don’t know how- how to tell him that his dad isn’t coming home.” 

“I’ll tell him with you.” Rhodey put his arm around Pepper and guided her over to the couch and soon there was the sound of little feet running on the floor. 

“Daddy? Where’s daddy, Uncle Rhodey?” Peter asked as he ran into the living room and started looking around the room for his dad. 

He was dressed in grey track pants that were on backwards and his top was inside out. Tony always dressed Peter so he hadn’t learned how to do it himself properly just yet. 

Rhodey patted the couch seat between him and Pepper. “We need to talk to you, Peter. Come sit down.” 

Peter’s smile dropped as he walked towards the two adults. Rhodey picked him up and sat him between the two of them as Peter’s lip started to wobble. “Am I in trouble?”

Rhodey shook his head. “No, buddy. You’re not in trouble but we need to tell you something about your dad.”

Peter sat up on his knees and looked excitedly at Rhodey with so much hope in his eyes. “Daddy’s coming home today because it’s Friday. He pinky promised me.” 

Pepper let out another sob and Peter turned towards her then back at Rhodey again. “Peppers sad but I dunno why.”

Rhodey placed his hand on Peter’s knee. “Peter, your dad isn’t going to be coming home today.” 

Peter looked a mixture of confused and worried. “Oh. Well then daddy’s gonna come home tomorrow.” 

Rhodey shook his head and hated how happy and hopeful Peter sounded. “No, buddy. Your dad isn’t going to be coming home again.” 

Peter didn’t understand. Why was Uncle Rhodey saying that his daddy wasn’t going to be coming home? His daddy pinky promised him. 

“But… but daddy pinky promised me he’s coming home. So he is.” Peter tried to argue but Rhodey kept shaking his head and looking at him sadly. 

“No, Peter. It’s not that simple.” Rhodey had no idea how to tell Peter this. He needed his best friend here but if his best friend was here then he wouldn’t have to have this conversation. “Your dad is lost somewhere but no one knows where he is.” 

Peter’s eyebrows scrunched together as he tried to imagine why his dad was gone. “Just like hide and go seek?” 

“Yeah, just like hide and go seek but your dads a really good hider and so no one can find him.” Rhodey explained to the four year old the best he could. 

Peter got up from the couch and smiled at Rhodey. “Daddy’s not even good at hide and seek! He always bad at hiding just so I find him. I can help!”

Peppers heart was breaking while she listened to Peter trying to understand why his dad wasn’t coming back. She made eye contact with Rhodey then looked back at Peter who had a smile on his face. 

“No, bud. It’s not that easy.” Rhodey said again. He would say it as many times as he had to to get Peter to understand. Tony would want him to make his kid understand why he wasn’t coming back. 

Peter’s face fell as he played with his hands. A nervous habit that he started after Tony first asked him why his expensive watch was in the toilet. 

The adults waited for it to process in Peter’s brain for a few seconds. Peter looked up at Rhodey with his lip wobbling and tears in his eyes. “So daddy’s not coming home today? Or tomorrow?” 

Rhodey sadly nodded his head. He watched the tears fall out of the toddlers eyes and he let out a sad sob but he was still trying to hold it in. 

“Is-is daddy coming home ever?” Peter asked sadly as he lifted his tiny fists up to his eyes. 

Rhodey shook his head. “We don’t know for sure yet, Peter. He’s still missing.” 

Peter’s whole body shook and then he let out a loud cry followed by many more. He lifted his arms up to Pepper and she immediately took the distraught toddler in her arms and cradled him in her lap as he cried loudly. 

Rhodey grabbed onto Peter’s leg gently, wishing so badly that Tony was here. 

“Is-is it ‘cause I-I bad?” Peter cried out as he continued to shake. 

“No, Peter.” Rhodey felt his heart breaking. Where was his best friend?

Pepper moved Peter so that his head was on her shoulder as she held his bum and his back. “No, baby. That’s not why. It’s not your fault, Peter. Your daddy wouldn’t want you to blame yourself.” 

“I wan’- I wan’ daddy. Give me my daddy.” Peter begged. He just wanted to be in his daddy’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh I hope you guys liked that! The next few chapters now are going to follow this story for a bit:) I’ve written so much of it and I love it sooo much ahh! Ok so I 100% agree that Pepper shouldn’t have waited that long to tell Peter but she didn’t want to give up hope and make Peter lose his hope.


	10. I wanna be wherever you are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hii guys:) I’m so excited to post this ahhhh!! I made myself cry while writing this omgg:( mainly because I was listening to sad songs. I’ll give you a list of the songs I was listening to while writing most of this and the next few chapters: 
> 
> Where does the good go by Tegan and Sara 
> 
> You can’t stop the girl by Bebe Rexha 
> 
> Home by Aron Wright
> 
> I will be there by Odessa 
> 
> Grace by Kate Havenevik
> 
> Anyways those are just some songs that I love and made me cry while writing this! I hope you guys like ittt

Pepper ended up carrying Peter up to his bed after he cried himself to sleep in her arms. 

She placed the toddler into his bed, tucking him under the blankets and turning on his night light before she left the room. She checked the time and saw that it was just passed nine in the morning. It was way too early for Peter to be sleeping but she knew that he tired himself out by crying so hard. 

His nap time was at twelve but she wasn’t so sure he would be having that today. 

Pepper walked downstairs and sat across from Rhodey on the couch. 

Neither of them said anything for a few minutes. Both were thinking about what was going to happen next. With Peter. With Tony. How to live life now without Tony in it. 

Rhodey spoke up after a few minutes of silence. “I’m not gonna stop looking for him.”

Pepper didn’t say anything. 

“There has to be something that we missed.” Rhodey continued but Pepper was shaking her head. 

“And what if he’s already dead? What-what if you come across his body?” Pepper asked with fear in her voice. She didn’t want to receive that phone call. 

“Let’s cross that bridge when we come to it.” Rhodey stood up and started walking towards the door. “I’m gonna go. I’ll call you if I find out anything.” 

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.  
.

Pepper received no calls from Rhodey for two weeks. 

She did receive lots of flowers and chocolates to the house. She only got through about ten cards before she tossed everything into a box. 

She didn’t want to read anymore condolence cards. She couldn’t read anymore. 

The flowers were slowly dying on the table and the chocolates were left untouched. 

That scared Pepper the most because she knew that Peter knew that the chocolates were there and yet they still remained untouched. 

The house was quiet. 

What was supposed to be a loud house full of laughter was now quiet. So quiet. Too quiet. 

Pepper felt like she had cried out all her tears because every time she cried, nothing came out. 

Peter on the other hand, didn’t seem to ever run out of tears. He was either crying loudly and refused to be comforted by Pepper or he would cry silently as to not bother Pepper but she would always hold him until he fell asleep in her arms from pure exhaustion. 

Pepper checked the time and saw that it was just past ten at night. Peter didn’t have a bedtime anymore because his sleep schedule was so messed up so she didn’t bother to get him to bed at eight o’clock anymore. 

She still had to get him to bed eventually though so Pepper stood up from the kitchen table and walked over to where Peter was sitting on the living room floor and staring at his toys but he wasn’t playing with them. 

He hadn’t played with them in over a week. 

“Peter, it’s time for your bath and then bed.” Pepper said. Peter usually listened to everything Pepper said and followed her instructions like a robot. 

She knew absolutely no child should be listening to a grownup the way Peter does but she knows that Peter is normal child. 

This is why she is surprised when Peter doesn’t make any move to get up. 

“Peter, now please.” Pepper had no patience left. She had nothing. She felt numb and listening to Peter cry for his daddy every day was killing her. 

Peter looked up at Pepper with an angry look on his face. She noticed that he looked a lot older than he should. 

“It’s my birthday tomorrow and daddy isn’t here.” Peter said monotune. He had no emotion to his voice at all and that terrified Pepper. 

She knew it was Peter’s fifth birthday tomorrow. Him and Tony had been counting down the days for the last four months because as soon as Peter turned five he would be old enough to go to the science museum with his daddy. 

Tony promised he would take him on his fifth birthday and now that wasn’t going to be happening anymore. 

Peter turned back to his toys and continued to stare at them. 

Pepper sat on the couch behind Peter and cried silently. No tears fell out of her eyes but that didn’t mean that the sadness left as well. 

A few minutes passed... or hours, Pepper wasn’t sure. She stood up and grabbed Peter by the underarms as she picked the toddler up and held him on her hip. 

This was his last day being a toddler and Tony wouldn’t get to be there for that. After he turns five he will no longer be a toddler. 

Pepper carried Peter into the bathroom and placed him on the floor because he went dead weight in her arms and made her do all the work. 

She ran the bath for him, not filling it up all the way because it would be a quick one. She knew if Tony was here then it would have been a very fun and special bath that would have ended in lots of giggles and a soaked bathroom. 

While the bath was filling up, she tugged down Peter’s pants and his underwear. “Can you stand up so I can take off your shirt, Peter?” 

Peter shook his head as he looked at Pepper with a blank expression on his face. 

She sighed as she pulled Peter onto her lap and got the shirt off of him while he stayed a dead weight. Pepper had to hold his head up so it didn’t bend his neck at an odd angle. 

She lifted Peter up and placed him in the bath but as soon as she did, Peter continued to stay boneless. 

“Peter, this isn’t funny. Sit up so I can bathe you.” Pepper said firmly. She wasn’t going to yell at Peter but she wanted to. 

Pepper tried to get Peter to sit up and suddenly Peter moved away from her grip and let out a loud sob. “No! I don’ wanna take a bath! I wan’ daddy! I wan’ daddy!”

“I know. I know, baby. Your daddy’s looking down on you right now.” Pepper said before she had the chance to really think about what she was saying. 

Peter’s stopped crying and looked at her. “Is my daddy in heaven?”

Pepper covered her mouth with her hand. She didn’t know what to say. She was sure that Tony was dead. 

It’s been three weeks and there’s been no leads or anything on Tony. It was as if he had just vanished off the face of the earth. 

“I don’t know, baby.” Pepper caressed his cheek but Peter moved away from the contact which he had been doing recently. Peter was never one to deny physical comfort but she didn’t blame him right now. 

Peter looked at his hands as he was in deep thought. He then looked up at Pepper. “Well, if my daddy’s in heaven then I want to go to heaven too so I can see daddy again and give him a hug.” 

Peppers heart dropped into her stomach. “No. No, Peter. Don’t say that. Your daddy wouldn’t want a hug from you if it meant you had to go to heaven to give him one.” 

Peter’s lip wobbled and more tears fell out of his eyes. “But I miss him. And I wan’ see him again.”

Pepper felt a tear fall down her own cheek. She wiped it away out of shook since she hadn’t cried tears in a week. 

“I miss him too, baby. It’s okay, I’m here.” Pepper knew it wasn’t okay. Nothing was okay anymore. 

Peter continued to cry while Pepper quickly washed his body and lifted him out of the tub. She wrapped the toddler in a towel and carried him into his bedroom where she laid him on his bed as she grabbed some clean pyjamas to put on him. 

Peter kicked the towel off of him and curled into a ball on his bed. It was his birthday tomorrow and his daddy wasn’t even there to give him a birthday cuddle. 

He didn’t understand why daddy couldn’t just come back home to him and give him a hug. It wasn’t fair. All the other boys and girls had their daddy’s to hold and hug them but Peter didn’t have a daddy anymore. 

His best friend was gone. 

Peter let out a quiet whimper as Pepper turned around and tried to get Peter dressed into his pants. 

“Please, Peter. It’s bedtime. You need a lot of rest since you’re going to be a whole year older tomorrow.” Pepper tried to say excitedly but that didn’t turn out since she was breaking inside. 

“No! I don’ wan’ to turn five anymore! I wan’ stay four so daddy can still come home!” Peter cried out and kicked his legs in the air. 

Pepper didn’t know what he meant by that but at the same time she understood him. 

“Please, baby. Your Daddy would want you to put your pyjamas on.” Pepper tried to grab Peter’s ankle but he kicked his legs and tried to crawl away from her so Pepper sighed in defeat. 

“Daddy pinky promised me he would take me to da science m-museum.” Peter let out a loud cry. “I wan’ him!”

Pepper leaned her back against Peter’s bed as she listened to Peter cry himself to sleep just like he did every single night. Once he was asleep, she dressed him in his pyjama pants but left his top off as to not wake the toddler. 

Pepper left his bedroom and went to her own room so she could cry herself to sleep. 

.  
.  
.

The next day Pepper woke up to her alarm going off. She had no idea she even set an alarm and when she went to shut it off on her phone, it wasn’t turning off. 

“What the-” Pepper sat up in bed and realized that the sound wasn’t coming from her phone. It was coming from… the ceiling. 

“Jarvis? What is that?” Pepper asked confused as she got out of bed. 

“Boss has programmed me to play a birthday tune for Peter as soon as he wakes up on his birthday.” Jarvis explained but Pepper was immediately getting out of bed and running to Peter’s bedroom. “Turn it off, Jarvis! Turn it off!”

Pepper didn’t want Peter to think that Tony was home. She ran across the hallway to Peter’s bedroom and opened the door. 

Peter was sitting up in bed with his shirt off and rubbing his eyes. He looked over at Pepper confused and then started crying. 

“I don’ wan’ turn five without daddy here! He’s supposed to be here! I wan’ him!” Peter cried out. He sat up in bed and his chest was heaving so Pepper quickly kneeled in front of him and grabbed him so that he was in her arms. 

“It’s okay, baby. It’s okay. Just breathe. In and out.” Pepper looked down at Peter and saw that he was turning blue from lack of oxygen getting into his brain so she quickly stood up and carried the child downstairs and outside so he could get some fresh air. 

Pepper walked over to the pool chairs and sat down in one of them while she continued to rock Peter back and forth. His colour was coming back and he was now crying which Pepper saw as a good sign so she continued to rock him back and forth. 

She wasn’t sure how long they were outside for but when she walked back into the house with Peter on her hip, Happy and Rhodey were standing in the kitchen looking like they wanted to be anywhere but here. 

“Happy fifth birthday, Peter.” Rhodey said. Peter shoved his face in Peppers neck and let out a whimper. Pepper looked over at the two men and shook her head. 

She then carried Peter back upstairs to his bedroom so she could get him dressed for the day. 

“How about this, a blue top with red pants?” Pepper suggested but Peter shook his head. 

“No. I don’ wan’ turn five. Only when dada comes home.” Peter crossed his arms over his bare chest. 

Pepper wasn’t going to argue with Peter all day. She stood up and grabbed Peter so that he was lying on the floor and pulled down his pyjama pants while she tried to wrestle him into his underwear. 

“No! No! No!” Peter cried and kicked his feet out at her. 

There was a knock at the door before the door was being pushed open. Pepper looked over at the door to see Rhodey walking in. 

“How’s it going in here? Want me to get him dressed?” Rhodey asked as Pepper was already standing up and leaving him to it. 

Rhodey sat down in front of Peter and grabbed his underwear so he could dress him. Peter was hiccuping as he watched Rhodey. 

When he tried to put Peter’s legs through his underwear, Peter kicked him. 

“No! I don’ wan’ turn five!” Peter cried out. 

Rhodey nodded his head. “I totally understand you. Turning five comes with great responsibility.” Rhodey then turned to look at Peter again. “Want me to tell you a story?” 

Peter nodded his head. “Daddy tells me stories.”

“Well, this one is about your daddy. And you.” Rhodey wasn’t sure if Peter would want to talk about his dad right now but the way his eyes lit up, Rhodey knew it would be perfect to talk to him about Tony. “It was your very first birthday and your dad was so excited because he got you this really cool new teddy bear. He wrapped it up in a box and everything. He took a bunch of pictures of you in front of the box just waiting for you to open it but you didn’t.” 

Peter get out a small giggle at the story. Rhodey continued. “He tried so hard to get you to open your present but all you cared about was what was behind the camera. Do you know who that was?”

“Daddy!” Peter said excitedly and then his lip started wobbling and his tiny fists rubbed his eyes as tears fell out. “I wan’-I wan’ daddy for this birthday too.” 

Rhodey sighed. He hated watching Tony’s kid suffering like this. “Me too, bud. How about we try to have fun anyways, okay? We can eat cake while you open your presents.” 

Peter shook his head but it went unnoticed by Uncle Rhodey as he helped Peter get dressed into his birthday outfit that he didn’t even want. 

Rhodey lifted him up and carried him downstairs where there were balloons and streamers everywhere. Normally Peter would have been so happy and jumping around everywhere in the balloons but today wasn’t a normal day. Nothing was normal anymore. 

“Happy Birthday, Peter.” Happy said from where he was sitting at the kitchen table where there was a bunch of presents on it and a decorated Birthday table cloth. Peter shoved his face into Rhodey’s shoulder. 

“Sit down with Happy, bud.” Rhodey placed Peter in the chair next to Happy and Peter immediately climbed into the man’s lap and laid his back against his chest. 

Peter didn’t understand why everyone was trying to act happy without daddy here. It didn’t make any sense and Peter hated it. 

He tried to shut his eyes and picture his daddy sitting in front of him with a giant smile on his face and for a split second Peter felt content but when he opened his eyes the seat in front of him was empty. 

The sadness washed over Peter again and he just wanted to sit in his bedroom but then Pepper walked over holding the cake followed by Rhodey setting up a video camera across from him. 

“Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Happy-” 

Peter started trying to get out of Happys arms as he stood up. “No! No! I don’ wan’ to turn five! I wan’ daddy here!” Daddy!”

Happy struggled to hold Peter in his arms as Peter started kicking and screaming for them to stop. Everyone stopped singing and Rhodey stepped forward to grab Peter from Happy but Peter only started kicking harder once he was in his arms as well. 

“No! No-ooo!” Peter threw his head back in Rhodey’s arms as the man held Peter with his arm around his stomach so he didn’t lose his grip but that didn’t help because Peter wouldn’t stop fighting. 

Pepper knew this was a bad idea. She just wanted to give Peter a birthday party because no kid should ever go without one but she knew Peter didn’t want to celebrate his birthday unless Tony was here and she knew he wouldn’t be coming home again so birthdays just might be ruined for Peter forever. 

“Okay. Come here.” Pepper grabbed Peter out of Rhodey’s arms and tried to rock him back and forth but he was still crying loudly. “We don’t have to celebrate your birthday. How about we go do something else. What do you wanna do?” 

Peter pulled his face away from Peppers neck and started hiccuping “I wan’ daddy.” 

Pepper looked at the two males in the room and then started walking into the living room. “Shut the camera off.” 

As the camera shut off, the last thing that was heard was Peter crying for his dad. 

.  
.  
.

“He’s not doing well, Pep.” Happy pointed out as they watched Peter sit on the living room floor and drink his juice from his sippy cup. Pepper had put a cartoon on for him but Peter didn’t look like he was watching it. 

Pepper glared at Happy. “I know that, Happy. You don’t think I do? I listen to him cry himself to sleep every single night while he cries for Tony and there’s nothing I can do about it.” 

Everyone was silent for a few seconds before Happy spoke up. “It’s been three weeks, almost a month and Tony’s still not home. I think it might be time to tell Peter that Tony’s… dead.” 

“We don’t know that for sure.” Rhodey said. He knew there was only a very very slight chance that Tony would be coming home but he wouldn’t stop looking until he found him alive or found his body. 

“It’s very likely. I think it’s best we tell Peter” Happy tried to say but Pepper left the kitchen and went to go sit with Peter so Happy turned to Rhodey. “His kid still thinks that’s he’s coming home. At least this way we can start moving on and Peter can process the fact that he’s never going to see his dad again.” 

Rhodey knew Happy was right. It’ll be hard for Peter at first but it was time that he come to terms with that. He just didn’t want Peter to grow up in a world without his dad. 

He would do everything in his power to protect Peter but he knew that no one would ever love and protect Peter the way that Tony did. The way that Tony was supposed to for the rest of his life. 

“I’m not gonna stop looking for him. I’m taking a bunch of men out in three days and we’re going back to the place he may have been taken.” Rhodey didn’t want to give up hope. Not yet. 

Happy sighed. “So we just have Peter keep hoping and wondering if his dad is dead or if he’s alive and gonna come home? I’m not saying today, but we need to tell him so he can start to process it.” 

Rhodey didn’t like that idea but he knew that they had to tell Peter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A toddler is a child that are ages 1-4 but some ppl think it’s 1-3 and there’s no actual right answer it’s just opinion I guess and in my opinion it’s 1-4 so basically Tony missed out on Peter being a toddler for the last few weeks:( 
> 
> Also I literally forgot how the birthday song went so I had to look it up haha


	11. I wish I was there to make the pain go away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hii guys:) I’m back with another heart breaking chapter:( I’m sorry there’s so many chapters like this, I promise some happy and cuddles will be coming soon but I had this idea for so long and I wanted to put all my ideas down so... lots of chapters:) 
> 
> I hope you guys like this:)

Tony’s chest was aching. 

He was used to the constant ache in his chest ever since the explosion that went off but today it was really bad for some reason. As always, Tony ignored the pain the best he could since there was nothing he could do about it. 

That wasn’t even the worst pain of all. 

The worst pain was missing his son. Tony thought about Peter every second of everyday. Peter was all he thought about. 

He’s sure that if it wasn’t for Peter, he would have given up a long time ago and wouldn’t have fought so hard to stay alive. 

But he didn’t want to die. Sometimes he wished he could die just so the constant pain and fear would all go away but then he thought about seeing his son one day. 

Even if he could see Peter one last time just to give him a goodbye hug and tell him that Peter’s going to be okay without him, that was all he needed. 

Of course Tony would love to raise his son and teach him so many new things, he didn’t see as that was possible. As much as he dreamt about getting to hold his son one last time and tell him how much he loves him, Tony didn’t think that was ever going to happen. 

He wasn’t sure how long he’s been in this cave for but he knows it’s been well over a week. 

Him and Yinsen have been working non stop to build the Jericho missile but Tony had another idea in plan. 

It was cold and dark down there and Tony’s hands were freezing all the time which made it extra hard to work since his hands would always clamp up. 

Yinsen and him had been working for over sixteen hours when the doors were opening violently. A group of men walked in holding Stark Industry guns but Tony was used to seeing that by now. 

He was used to this whole process. 

The man would bust in and would start shouting at them to build faster and ask for updates which Yinsen would translate over to them. 

Tony was sure that the leader spoke English but he chose not to just to be more intimidating to Tony. Tony didn’t really care anymore. 

The bald one started speaking to Yinsen. “Yah kab kiya jaega?” 

Yinsen looked over at Tony as he spoke. “Ham abhee bhee kaam kar rahe hain” 

“Mujhe ek din de do!” The bald one spoke again. Tony had some idea what they were saying since they came here almost every day and demanded answers. 

“Main nahin jaanata ki yah kis din hai” Yinsen looked over at Tony again as he spoke and Tony wondered if they were talking about him. 

“Yah das hai!” 

Yinsen looked down at the floor and then the leader was grabbing him by the face. “Mujhe yah chaahie!”

Tony watched the leader let go of Yinsens face and he waited until they all left before putting his hands down and going to stand in front of Yinsen. “What did they say?” 

Yinsen sat down on the broken stool that was at their workstation. “They said they want the missile done, Stark.” 

Tony sat down on one of the chairs and sighed. “By when? Did they give you a date? How are we supposed to know when to get it done by if we don’t even know what day it is today?” 

“It’s August tenth, Stark.” Yinsen stood up and walked over to their other work station. 

Tony felt his heart beating in his chest as if it was going to explode and that was very possible so he tried to take a few breaths to try and stop that from happening. 

August 10. August 10. Peter’s birthday. He was missing his sons birthday. 

“Are you okay, Stark?” Yinsen asked concerned, seeing as Tony was having some difficulty breathing. 

Tony placed one hand over his chest and held his other hand up to Yinsen. “Yeah. Yeah. Just… give me a minute.” 

Tony thought about Peter and what he would be doing today. It was his fifth birthday and he wasn’t even there for it. He pinky promised him that he would take him to the science museum seeing as though he was finally old enough to go. Now, that wasn’t going to happen and Tony felt sick. 

He was missing his baby’s birthday. 

Tony took a few breaths in to try and calm himself down then he looked over at Yinsen who was watching him with wide eyes. 

“Remember-remember how I told you I didn’t have any family?” Tony said. He told Yinsen when they first met that he didn’t have anything. He didn’t know who he could trust and he had to keep his son safe. 

Now, Tony knew he could trust Yinsen and he wanted to talk about his son. 

“Yes, Stark.” 

Tony ran his hands through his hair as he walked closer to Yinsen and sat down. “I lied. I have a son and today's his birthday.” 

Yinsen nodded in understanding. “And you’re here.” 

Tony nodded. “I’m here.” 

It was silent for a few minutes so Tony thought the conversation was over but then Yinsen spoke again. “How old is your son, Stark?” 

Tony was about to say four but then he corrected himself last second. “He’s five.” 

“So then I was wrong,” Yinsen weakly smiled at him. “You are a man that has everything.” 

Tony didn’t say anything. He thought about his kid and what Peter would be doing right now. 

Tony pinky promised Peter he would come home so he was going to do everything in his power to get home to him. 

.  
.  
.

“Peter please eat something?” Pepper begged the child. It was six in the morning and Peter was going to his first day of Senior Kindergarten. 

Peter loved school and used to talk about it all the time with Tony and how he was so excited to be going back to kindergarten in September but now he wasn’t even talking anymore. 

It was Peter’s first day of Senior Kindergarten but also it’s been exactly a month today since Tony went missing. 

It was only six in the morning and a Pepper was already done with the day. 

Peter woke up screaming from a nightmare so she had to calm him down which took longer than usual. After that, Peter refused to be comforted or touched by her so Pepper had to slowly encourage Peter to get dressed on his own. 

It took a lot of talking and encouragement but Peter got himself dressed in a white long sleeved shirt with a blue dinosaur on the front and black jeans that had dinosaurs on the back pockets. 

Now, Pepper was trying to get Peter to eat his breakfast but Peter wasn’t even looking at it. He sat with his arms crossed on the chair and was looking out the window with his thumb in his mouth. 

Pepper noticed this habit that Peter got back into and it frustrated her. Peter shouldn’t be sucking his thumb but here he was and Pepper didn’t want to tell Peter no so she let him. 

“No. Not gonna.” Peter crossed his arms over his chest and Pepper sighed. 

Over the past month since Tony’s been gone, Peter went from a happy and sweet child to an angry, sad and developed a horrible attitude. Pepper didn’t blame him at all, the boy just lost his father and now had to learn to live life without someone who was supposed to be in his life forever. 

“Okay. Let’s get your shoes and jacket on then.” Pepper said but Peter still made no move to get up. Pepper was all too familiar with this so she grabbed Peter’s shoes and new jacket and brought it over to him. 

Peter just watched her as he sucked on his thumb. She quickly put his shoes on him and jacket before lifting the child onto her hip and carrying him to the car with his backpack. 

Pepper was silent as she buckled Peter into his car seat and then drove to his school. 

She would have to talk to Peter’s kindergarten teacher about what’s going on in his life but she’s sure that as soon as she learns Peter’s last name is Stark then she will already know. 

The car ride to the elementary school was spent in silence and when Pepper parked the car and tried to unbuckle Peter from his car seat, he started screaming and crying. 

“No! No, don’ wan’ go to school! I wan’ stay with you!” Peter cried out and tried to grab onto Peppers arm but she stopped him. 

“You’re gonna have so much fun at school, Peter. You’re gonna make so many new friends and then I’ll pick you up right after school.” Pepper picked Peter up and held him on her hip as he continued to scream and cry. She thought that this should be Tony’s job. He should be the one taking Peter to his first day of Senior Kindergarten but instead it was her. 

“No! Please! No!” Peter cried. He stopped kicking and squirming and let himself go boneless in Peppers hold. 

Pepper walked into the classroom where there were more kids crying on their first day of school. It wasn’t any different from the way Peter was crying but at the same time it was. 

These children were crying for their mothers and fathers not to leave them for a few hours while Peter was crying just to be in his dad's arms one last time. 

The teacher walked over to Pepper, having recognized her. Pepper had already emailed the school about what was going on and that she would need to talk to Peter’s teacher. 

She walked up to the two and leaned down so that she was closer to Peter’s level as he laid on the floor and cried. “Hello, Peter. It’s so nice to meet you. My name is Ms. Robbins and I’m so excited to have you in my class this year.” 

Peter only looked at the blonde women and cried harder. 

Pepper handed Peter’s backpack to the teacher. “He didn’t want to eat breakfast so I packed him some extra snacks. Can I also talk to you for a second?” 

“Of course” Ms. Robbins said as they stepped away from Peter crying on the floor to have some privacy. “I heard about what happened on the news and I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t even understand how hard it is for Peter but I’ll do my best to help him through this.” 

Pepper nodded her head. She had mixed emotions whenever people would send their condolences. Part of her was grateful for it but the other part wanted to punch them for implying that Tony was dead. 

“It’s been really hard on Peter. I think he just needs to get out of the house and it’s a good time for him to start school,” Pepper paused and looked over at Peter who was now sucking his thumb on the floor. “I don’t know how he will be today but if it gets too much then call me and I’ll come and get him.” 

“Of course. I’m sure Peter will be fine but I’ll call you if that is needed.” Ms. Robbins smiled warmly at Pepper before the two walked back over to Peter. 

Pepper leaned down and pulled Peter to his feet, thankfully he stayed standing up. “I’m going to go now, Peter. I’ll pick you up after school at three.” Pepper waited for Peter to start crying or something but he didn’t do anything which surprised her. She could never predict what Peter’s going to do next. “Ms. Robbins here is going to spend the day with you, okay?”

Peter looked up at the teacher and lifted his arms up to her but the teacher held out her hand instead. “How about we walk into the classroom together?”

“No-ooo!” Peter sank back down to the floor as he started crying again. 

“I got this, Ms. Potts. We’ll be okay.” The teacher said to Pepper who slowly nodded and then left. 

Pepper hated leaving Peter like that but she couldn’t take it anymore. As soon as she got into the car, she broke down. 

“No! I wan’ go home!” Peter begged as he continued to cry. The new girl who had blonde hair smiled at him as she picked him up under the arms and carried him over to where they were a bunch of other boys and girls sitting on a carpet while another girl read them a book. 

“Do you want to sit with me or on the carpet?” Ms. Robbins asked Peter. 

“I wan’ stay with you.” Peter said so she sat down with him in her lap as the teacher read a book to the class. 

After about an hour, Peter calmed down enough and once snack time started, Peter was sitting at a table with a bunch of other kids but he wasn’t talking to any of them. 

Both of the kindergarten teachers watched Peter from a distance. “That is Tony Stark's kid, right?” 

Ms. Robbins nodded. “Yeah. Poor thing. I can’t imagine losing your father at such a young age.” 

She then went and sat next to Peter who was rolling his muffin into a ball on the table. “Hey, Peter. How about you eat your food instead of playing with it?” 

Peter kept rolling his food ball. “I wan’ daddy.” 

The teacher sighed. “I know, sweetie. But your daddy would want you to eat your food.” 

Peter shook his head. “No. Daddy says I don’ hafta if I don’ wanna.” 

Ms. Robbins didn’t want to correct the child about his recently deceased father so she stood up and left him to it. 

After snack time was over, the whole kindergarten class gathered around on the carpet and everyone was taking turns one by one to talk about themselves. 

Peter sat down by himself in the corner, away from all the other students as he watched with wide eyes and put his thumb in his mouth to suck on. 

All the kids went up one by one and talked about themselves which included their favourite food and if they had any pets at home. Some of the kids would mention something about their mom and dad and Ms. Robbins would immediately look at Peter but he didn’t even seem to be paying attention. 

Once all the kids went up, it was Peter’s turn. “Peter, it’s your turn to share something about yourself.” 

Peter shook his head. Ms. Debby, the other teacher sighed. “All the children went up, Peter. You should too.” 

Peter then took his thumb out of his mouth and walked to the center of the circle, which wasn’t really a circle anymore. 

“You can introduce yourself and say a few things about you.” The teacher explained as Peter stood there shyly. 

“My name is Peter Stark and my daddy’s my bestest friend in the whole wide world.” Peter made wide arm gestures but then stopped. “But now my daddy’s in heaven so I can’t give him hugs no more.” 

Both of the teachers were heart broken by what Peter was saying and they were going to tell Peter that he didn’t have to talk anymore but one of the kids spoke up. 

“Why is your daddy in heaven? My daddy’s at work.” A four year old boy with long blonde hair asked. 

Peter shrugged his shoulders. “Because Uncle Rhodey said Daddy was playing hide and seek but he was so good at it and no one find him so then he died.” 

“But why?” Another kid asked so Ms. Robbins stood up and got all the kids attention. 

“How about we all go find a seat at a table so we can do some math.” All the kids ran up to go find a seat while Peter walked slowly at sat by himself at a table. 

“Peter, you should go sit with some of your friends.” Ms. Robbins asked but Peter shook his head. 

“No. I don’ have any friends.” Peter said then continued to draw on his math problem sheet. Ms. Robbins watched him for a few minutes before asking what he was drawing. 

“What are you drawing, Peter?” 

Peter put his red marker down started to point to the picture. “That’s me and my daddy holding hands and laughing together. I don’ get to see him no more so I draw him now.” 

“That’s a really beautiful drawing, Peter.” Ms. Robbins pulled Peter in for a hug as she tried her best to hold in her tears. 

The rest of the day ended up passing by fairly quickly and Pepper was one of the firsts to pick their child up from school. 

Peter ran into her arms and she immediately picked him up and placed him on her hip. “Hi baby. How was your first day?” 

Peter didn’t answer her as he shoved his face into her neck. 

.  
.  
.

It was bath time and Pepper was washing Peter’s hair while he sat there and stared at the water. 

Peter barely said anything about school and every time Pepper would ask him, he would simply shrug his shoulders. She gave up on trying to get him to open up. 

“Pepper, why do all the other kids get to have a mommy and a daddy and I don’ have any?” Peter asked as he looked up at her with his big brown eyes that he got from Tony. 

“Well, Peter,” Pepper tried to think about what to say. Every time Peter spoke of his dad, her heart would shatter just a little bit more and she didn’t know how much longer she could deal with it. “When you were just two months old, your daddy met you for the very first time.” 

Peter nodded his head, he’s heard the story a million times but he loved to hear it again and again because it always reminded him just how much his daddy loves him. 

“Can you tell me the story again? Just the way daddy does it.” Peter asked. 

Pepper hated how Peter spoke about Tony as if he was still around. She nodded her head anyways. 

“Well, your mommy loved you a lot but not as much as your daddy did. Your mommy wanted you to live a happy life but she wasn’t able to give you that life so she called your daddy who didn’t even know you existed until that day,” Pepper paused because she saw the bright smile on Peter’s face. 

“And daddy loved me right when he first held me, right?” Peter asked with excitement. Pepper knew Peter knew the story so well he could tell it himself and he has but she knew Peter needed to hear it tonight. 

“That’s right, baby. As soon as your dad held you in his arms he said ‘this is my baby and no ones going to take him away from me’” Pepper made her voice go deeper to try and sound like Tony but it was a complete fail. 

Peter looked down sadly. “But now somebody took my daddy away from me.” 

Pepper cupped Peter’s cheek in her hand and looked at him sadly. 

“My daddy’s in heaven while everyone else’s daddy’s get to be at work.” Peter said sadly. Pepper was going to ask Peter who told him that but then she guessed it was from today at school. 

“He’s very happy in heaven, Peter. I bet you he’s watching you right now and is thinking about how much he loves you.” Pepper grabbed the rinse cup to rinse Peter’s hair out. 

Peter didn’t say a word for the rest of the night but Pepper had to listen to him cry himself to sleep for yet another night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo that language that was in there that wasn’t in English, that was Hindi and I just want to say right now, I don’t speak Hindi, I just used google translate for it so it might be wrong and to someone who actually speaks Hindi, sorry if it’s wrong. I also looked it up plus from the movie and stuff but like it said that the language that the bald leader was speaking to tony and Yinsen in was Hindi but I’m also not 100% so oops 
> 
> Alsooo ahhh poor Peter and Tony’s pinky promise that gets broken:( 
> 
> The next chapter will be out on Thursday:)


	12. You’re like a falling star

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m writing a future chapter for this fic but I haven’t been able to find the time to write it so I’m like ahhh it’s so frustrating

Pepper woke up early since she couldn’t sleep. 

Her head was killing her from all the sleepless nights and all the crying. Pepper was exhausted and just needed to forget about life for a little bit but she couldn’t do that. She had to take care of Tony’s son. 

It has been a month and a half, six weeks since Tony’s been gone and each day was getting harder and harder. 

Pepper thought of the quote that said, time heals all pain but not this pain. 

Grief doesn’t get better over time, you just get used to the pain until it’s just like a numbness that’s there. 

Bearable at times and other times, not so much. 

Each day was getting harder and harder because it was another day that was going by where Peter would ask for his dad and another day where Tony wasn’t coming home. 

Pepper could see that every single day was getting harder for Peter as well. He wasn’t eating unless Pepper sat him on her lab and forcefully fed him. He wasn’t talking anymore unless he was asking for stories about his daddy or asking for his daddy. 

She could see and feel that Peter was losing a lot of weight. He had always been a small kid who had a hard time gaining weight which was totally okay and normal but that was before. Now, Peter is way underweight and it is scaring Pepper but she’s having a hard time getting Peter to eat anything healthy that’s not goldfish or gummies. 

Pepper checked the time and saw that it was six in the morning. It was Friday so hopefully the weekend will be a little bit better than how the week went. 

She went to Peter’s bedroom to wake him up but as she got closer she heard whispering in his bedroom. 

At first Pepper thought that Rhodey or Happy were in his bedroom but she thought that would be odd considering they would have called first. 

She pushed the door open and looked around but she didn’t see anyone but Peter who was sitting crossed legged on his bedroom floor, facing the wall with his back to her. 

Pepper silently watched him. 

“That one was too nasty. I like the red one,” Peter whispered and then held up one of his toy cups. “It’s my favourite colour too.” 

Peter started giggling and nodding his head. “Okay. I’ll get it for you.” 

Pepper watched him turn around and start crawling towards his bed but then he saw her and sat up on his knees. “Peter? What are you doing?”

Peter looked back towards where he was talking to the wall and then looked up at Pepper. “I’m talking to daddy.” 

“What?” Pepper wasn’t sure if she heard that correctly but her heart was beating heavily in her chest. 

“Talking to daddy. He says he wants the red cup so I’m getting it for him.” Peter explained like it was the most normal thing. 

Pepper didn’t know what to do. She looked up to where Peter was just talking to the wall and then looked down at Peter who was still looking up at her with wide eyes. 

“Daddy’s not there, baby. Who are you talking to?” Pepper leaned down and asked the child but Peter looked back over to the wall and then stood up. 

“Yes he was! You scared him away!” Peter yelled and then started hitting Pepper as he cried. “He was here and now it’s not ‘cause you scared him ‘way!” 

Pepper grabbed Peter’s small wrists and held him. “Peter, stop. We don’t hit people. Your daddy wasn’t there, baby. Okay?” 

Peter looked back at the wall and shook his head. “He’s not there now! He was! I was talkin’ to him!”

Pepper pulled Peter into his arms and hugged him closely to her chest as he cried on her. 

.  
.  
.

Peter was sitting by himself in his classroom as he played with the LEGO blocks that were there. 

He wished his daddy would come back so he could talk to him again. Peter was so excited to see him after so long of not seeing him. 

Peter turned around and looked at all the other kids in his kindergarten classroom as they all played together and laughed. Peter wished he could play with them but that seemed like too much work. He only wanted to play with daddy. 

Peter made eye contact with his teacher and then looked away and continued to play with his LEGO blocks. 

Another kid who Peter didn’t like came and sat next to him. Peter didn’t like how the boy always picked his nose and then ate it. It was disgusting. 

“I want the blue toy.” The boy said as he grabbed the blue block from him. 

Peter didn’t say anything. He wanted to hit the nose picker on his head but then he remembered what Pepper told him this morning about not hitting people. 

Instead he kicked the boy in the leg. “That’s my block! Give it back!” 

“No! It’s mine now and you can’t make me!” The boy said and as he made a move to run away, Peter stood up and jumped on him as he started hitting him. 

Ms. Robbins pulled Peter off of the child while the other teacher tried to calm down the now sobbing boy. Peter stuck his tongue out at him. 

“Peter, that was very rude and very unacceptable. We do not do that. Say sorry.” Ms. Robbins said but Peter shook his head and crossed his arms. 

“No! Daddy told me to do it!” Peter yelled and tried to run away but his teacher had a tight grip on him. 

“No, Peter. Your daddy didn’t tell you to do that because that wasn’t a good thing to do.” Both teachers shared worried looks with each other. 

“Uh huh. He did! Daddy said to!” Peter stomped his foot again and tried to get out of his teachers hold and she let him go. 

Peter ran into the corner of the classroom and sat down with his legs up to his chest. Why did no one believe him that daddy was with him? People are so stupid!

Peter looked behind him and thankfully, no one was watching him. When he turned back around his daddy was there. 

“Hi daddy. That boy took my blue block. Now-now I don’ have it no more.” Peter straightened his legs in front of him to get more comfortable. 

“Yeah, that’s what I say too.” Peter nodded his head and continued to talk to his daddy for a little bit longer but then he felt something wet under him. 

Peter looked down and saw that his pants were all wet. 

He stood up to go tell his teacher by tugging on her shirt to get her attention. “Ms. Ms. Ms”

Ms. Robbins looked down at Peter and then her eyes softened at the sight. “Why didn’t you tell me you needed to go pee, Peter?”

Peter shrugged his shoulders and looked down. He didn’t even know he needed to go pee. It just slipped out on accident. 

“If you just told me then you wouldn’t have had an accident.” Ms. Robbins explained as she went to get Peter’s change of clothes from his cubby. 

Peter crossed his arms over his chest as he followed her. “Daddy told me to.” 

Ms. Robbins stopped walking and turned to look at Peter. She leaned down in front of him. “Peter, your daddy isn’t here so how could he have told you?” 

Peter felt his eyes tearing up. “He is here! He was until you scared him away! I hate you now!”

Peter ran away to the far corner of the classroom again and curled into a ball. 

“Peter, let’s go get you changed out of these clothes now.” His teacher said but as soon as she went to grab Peter, he started screaming and kicking her so she couldn’t touch him. 

Ms. Robbins stood up and immediately went to the phone to call Pepper. 

It took Pepper thirty minutes to get to the school. Ms. Robbins greeted her at the door. “Peter wet his pants and he refuses to let me change him. He also started fighting with another child today and I think he thinks his dad is here. He’s talking to him as if he’s here.” 

Pepper felt her heart racing. It was the same thing as this morning. “He uh, I caught him doing the same thing this morning.” Pepper said then took the clean clothes from the teacher and walked over to where Peter was hiding under one of the craft tables. 

“Peter, what’s going on?” Pepper asked but Peter immediately crawled out from under the table and threw himself into Peppers arms as he cried loudly. 

She stood up with Tony’s baby in her arms. “Can I change him in this bathroom here?” Pepper pointed to the bathroom and the teacher nodded so Pepper walked in and shut the door. 

“Peter, I’m gonna change you and then we’re gonna go home? You need to let go of me for a second.” Peter whimpered but let go of Pepper anyways. 

She tugged down Peter’s pants and his underwear then held onto his arm to balance him as he stepped out of the wet clothes. 

“Step into this, baby.” Pepper held out Peter’s underwear for him but he wasn’t stepping into it. She looked up at him and saw that he was crying silently. “Oh baby.” 

“I miss daddy.” Peter cried out and sank into Peppers arms. She patted his back and held him close. That’s all she could do now but she knew it wasn’t enough. It would never be enough. 

“I know. I know. Let’s get you dressed and then when we go home you can watch whatever you want.” Pepper helped Peter into his underwear and pants and put all his dirty clothes into the bag and stood up with him in her arms. There was no need to put his shoes on since she would be carrying him to the car and then into the house. 

She carried Peter out of the classroom and to the car. After the car ride, Pepper carried Peter into the house and immediately went upstairs to give Peter a bath in the bathroom so that he wasn’t sitting with the urine on his skin. 

The whole bath time, Peter was quiet and stared straight ahead as if he was in a trance. Pepper would have been terrified at that but she was used to it by now and she wasn’t sure what scared her more. 

The fact that Peter was doing it or the normalcy of it. 

Pepper lifted Peter out of the bath and wrapped a towel around his shoulders as she lead him into his bedroom. “Do you want to take a nap, Peter?” 

Peter slowly nodded his head and rubbed his eyes which Pepper was relieved at. She didn’t want to have to deal with Peter being so out of it right now. Hopefully he wakes up after his nap in a better mood. 

She dressed him in his pyjamas and then went to place him in his bed but Peter shook his head. “Wan’ sleep with daddy.” 

Pepper sighed. “I know, baby, but you know you can’t do that.” 

Peter puffed out a whimper and continued to rub at his eyes. “Wan’ him.” 

“How about you sleep in your own bed and think about him so you have happy thoughts?” Pepper suggested and pulled the blankets back so Peter could climb in. It took some force but he eventually was lying in his bed and Pepper was running her fingers through his hair to get him to fall asleep, something Tony did to calm his baby down. 

It didn’t take long for Peter to fall asleep and for Pepper to leave the room but Peter didn’t stay asleep for very long. 

He woke up because his pants were all wet and it was really uncomfortable. Peter sat up in bed and threw the blankets off of him so he get away from his now cold and wet bed. 

Peter didn’t mean to pee in his bed and it hadn’t happened for a long time, his daddy always said that he was such a quick learner when he was getting potty trained which made Peter proud. 

He pulled off his wet pyjama pants and went to go look for daddy. 

Peter slowly snuck out of his bedroom and had to crawl across the floor to get to daddy’s bedroom at the end of the hallway so Pepper wouldn’t see him. 

Once Peter made it to his daddy’s bedroom, he stood up and pushed the doors open. 

Pepper didn’t want him going in there anymore and he never knew why. Daddy always let him go in his bedroom whenever he wanted to and he wanted to now so he didn’t see why he couldn’t. 

As Peter stepped in, he felt a shiver run up his body. It felt… different. He didn’t know why it felt different because it was still daddy’s room. His bed was still unmade just like how he left it when he left that one day. 

Peter didn’t care that it felt different, he wanted to climb up onto daddy’s bed and go to sleep with him. Peter ran over to the giant bed in the middle of the room and tried to climb up but he was having trouble since it was too high up. His daddy always helped him climb up so Peter had to get up another way. 

He walked over to the other side of the bed, the side daddy slept on. He lifted his arms up and tried to climb up by using the nightstand table as leverage. 

“Daddy up.” Peter said as he got on the bed. He looked around but daddy wasn’t on the bed either. Peter sat down and sighed. “Daddy.” 

Peter fell backwards onto the bed and started humming to himself. He didn’t think he was being loud so when Pepper stood at the door, he was surprised. 

“What are you doing, Peter?” Pepper asked and she sounded mad. 

Peter sat up and crawled to the headboard of the bed as he tried to crawl under the blankets so Pepper couldn’t get to him but he didn’t get the chance to get very far since Pepper was grabbing him by the ankles and pulling him down to the edge of the bed. 

“You know you are not allowed in here, Peter!” Pepper hated walking into Tony’s bedroom. It was cold and eerie. 

Peter tried to rip his hand from out of Peppers hold as she dragged him out of the room. “No! I am allowed! Daddy said so!” 

Pepper lost it. She couldn’t deal with this anymore. She stopped walking abruptly and leaned down so she was at Peter’s height. “Your dad is dead, Peter. He’s not coming back and he didn’t tell you to go into his bedroom so stop it.” 

Peter burst into tears and threw himself to the ground so Pepper sighed, picked the screaming child up and carried him to his bedroom. 

“No! Daddy is coming home to me! No!” Peter cried out and once he was placed on his bedroom floor he started kicking his legs out. 

“Where’s your pants?” Pepper asked, having no patience right now. 

Peter ignored her which she was expecting so she went to grab his pants off his bed but she saw that it was wet. “Did you wet the bed, Peter?” 

“No! I wan’ daddy!” Peter tried to move himself closer to the bed so he could kick it but he gave up halfway and continued to cry. 

Pepper started to take the wet sheets off of the bed. She should have expected this sooner from Peter. He was struggling with the loss of his father at such a young age so she should have expected this to start happening. 

She just hoped that day time and bedtime wetting didn’t become a common reoccurrence. 

After putting all of Peter’s sheets into a pile by the door to deal with later, she walked into his bathroom and grabbed the package of baby wipes from on top of toilet and carried it over to Peter. 

Pepper grabbed two wipes out and quickly wiped Peter’s legs and privates to prevent a rash from starting. 

Peter tried to kick his legs at her but she didn’t let him. He clearly wasn’t happy with it but Pepper wasn’t going to argue with Peter right now. 

After that was done. She grabbed clean pyjama pants and tried to get them on Peter but he wasn’t cooperating and it was harder than the wipes. 

“Peter. Stop. If you want to come downstairs then you put these pants on.” Pepper warned but Peter tried to kick her again so she sighed and gave up. 

Standing up, Pepper placed the pyjama pants on the dresser for Peter to put on if he wanted to come downstairs. She then left the bedroom, leaving a crying Peter behind her. 

.  
.  
.

Pepper was looking at a photo album from when Peter was two years old. 

She traced over Tony’s face as if she could feel every single detail on him. A tear fell from her eye just as she looked up to see Peter standing in front of her. 

His face was red from all the crying and he stood holding the pyjama pants in one hand as he let out a puff of air. 

“Daddy always helps me.” Peter said as he stepped forwards and held out the pyjama pants for Pepper to help him get them on. 

“It’s okay, I’ll help you until you learn how.” Peter nodded his head as he stepped into his pants and Pepper pulled them up. 

Once they were on, he climbed onto the couch and looked at what Pepper was looking at with a curious look on his face. 

He smiled so widely as he pointed to a picture. “That’s my Daddy!” 

“That’s right, Peter. And do you know who this little person is?” Peter crawled onto Pepper’s lap so his back was resting against her chest and he held the photo album on his lap. 

“That’s baby Peter!” Peter explained excitedly. 

The picture was taken a day before Peter’s second birthday. He was sitting on Tony’s lap while Tony sat on the couch that they were currently sitting on. Tony had the brightest smile on his face as he looked at his son with so much admiration. 

Peter flipped the page over and continued to look at all the pictures of him and his daddy. He traced his tiny finger over his dads face carefully as if he was trying to embed it in his mind forever what Tony looked like. 

Pepper wondered if Peter would remember Tony by the time he’s older or if he’ll only remember his dad from these pictures and the stories people told of him. 

She knew that Peter will forever hold this emptiness in him at the loss of his father. He may not feel it right now but she knows that as he gets older, he will feel it in his heart, a piece that’s not there anymore because his dad no longer is. 

Silent tears fell from Peppers eyes as she wrapped her arms around Peter’s stomach. He pointed to another picture of him and Tony. 

“Look! Daddy.” Peter said. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to the picture of Tony. 

The picture was of Tony and Peter just two months before he left. 

Peter was on Tony’s hip wearing a swimsuit with his hair slicked back as he smiled at the camera. Tony was dressed in his own swimsuit since they had spent that whole day in the pool together but Tony wasn’t looking at the camera because his attention was on his son. Tony’s hand was still in midair from just pushing Peter’s hair back as both of them laughed loudly at the action. 

Pepper remembers that day vividly. 

She remembers how happy everyone was. How happy Peter was. 

Pepper felt Peter shake against her and then he started crying. “I-I miss daddy. And-and I-I wan’ him.” 

Pepper grabbed the photo album and placed it on the couch beside the two of them so she could turn Peter around on her lap. 

“I know you do, baby. I know you do.” Was all she said. It was all she could say to him. 

She knew the one thing Peter wanted wasn’t possible for him to have so all she could do was hold Peter tight and hope that Tony was watching over them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My heart is broken:( poor baby Peter


	13. I’m begging you for more time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another sad chapter:( a happy one is coming soon tho:)

Another week had passed and Pepper wasn’t sure how much longer so could go on like this for. 

Peter wasn’t the same child he was the day Tony left. He was quiet and angry. He lashed out a lot which still surprised Pepper every time since she wasn’t used to Peter behaving like that. 

Rhodey had called once and it wasn’t good news but it wasn’t the worst news that she had been dreading every single time the phone rang. 

He had said that there was still no sign of Tony and they still had no lead. She knew he couldn’t spend the rest of his life looking for Tony with no hope or any idea as to what happened or where he went so now it was only a matter of time before the search stopped. 

Pepper wasn’t sure what phone call she was dreading the most, the one where Rhodey calls to tell her that they can no longer look for Peter’s father or the one where they found Peter’s father's body. 

In a way, Pepper hoped that every time Rhodey called, if it had to be bad news she wanted that bad news to be that Tony’s body was found. She knew she was a horrible person for thinking and wanting that but she wanted to start really grieving and start trying to move on. 

The not knowing whether he’s dead or alive is what is really killing her and slowly breaking her down piece by piece. She’s not sure how much longer she can go. 

Now, Pepper has to get Peter to wear a pull-up to bed because he won’t stop wetting the bed. It’s happening every single night and sometimes multiple times in the night time for the past week. 

He’s having daytime accidents at school and occasionally at home and Pepper knows that it’s because Peter is still so young and he lost is father and doesn’t know how to deal with the lost. 

He’s still talking to Tony as if Tony is here and it scares Pepper more than anything. 

She knows that young children and animals can see ghosts and spirits when adults can’t and she’s not sure if Peter is actually seeing Tony or if Peter just thinks he can see his father. A way to help him cope with his dad not being there for him. 

Pepper leaned against Peter’s bedroom door to gather her thoughts before she walks into his bedroom and explains to him what he has to wear for now on. She’s not sure how long he’s going to have to wear pull-ups for but she needs him to wear them because she can’t keep changing his bed sheets every hour of the night and packing a whole backpack full of clothes. 

“Hi Peter. What are you doing?” Pepper asked as she sat on the floor next to Peter and placed the package next to her. 

Peter didn’t bother to look up at her. He was sitting, facing the wall with his back to her. “I’m playing with bear.” 

Pepper nodded her head. She watched him for a few seconds then tapped his shoulder. “Can you turn to me please?” 

Peter turned to face her with wide eyes. He looked down at the package next to Pepper so she opened it and pulled one out to explain to Peter. “You have to wear these for a bit, okay baby?” 

Peter looked at the pull-up then crossed his arms and shook his head. “No. I’m a big boy.” 

“I know you are, Pete, but you have to wear these because you’re having too many accidents, baby. This way you can sleep through the night and you don’t have to change your clothes in the day so many times.” Pepper explained slowly to him and waited for it to process in Peter’s brain. 

She could tell that he was either too tired to argue back or he just didn’t care anymore because he was nodding his head. “Okay. Then we go watch a movie?” 

Pepper shook her head sadly. “Not tonight, baby. You have school tomorrow, remember?” 

Peter didn’t say anything else so Pepper took that as her cue to help Peter take his clothes off and put his pull-up on. 

She dressed him in his pyjamas and helped him brush his teeth before she tucked him into bed. She was grateful that he was extra tired tonight since most nights aren’t so easy. 

Peter watched Pepper leave the room so he could get back up out of bed. He was tired but he didn’t want to sleep without saying goodnight to daddy first. 

As soon as his bedroom door was shut, Peter threw the blankets off of him and ran to his bedroom window. 

He could see the stars in the sky as they overlooked his bedroom, looking down on him. Peter giggled and started dancing in his bedroom with the stars so they could watch him. 

He continued on dancing and giggling before getting dizzy and falling to his butt on his bedroom floor. Peter laughed at himself and lifted his legs up in the air as he continued on giggling. 

Peter knew that his daddy was watching and dancing with him from all the way up in the stars. Pepper said daddy went to heaven and everyone else was saying that too and heaven was in the stars. 

Peter crawled over to the window and grabbed his pillow so he could fall asleep as close to his daddy as he could. 

.  
.  
.

Pepper had to meet with Obadiah Stane to talk about the future of Stark Industries in less than an hour and she still wasn’t even close to ready yet. 

When she went to wake Peter up and get him ready for school, she was surprised to find him sleeping on the floor by the window. 

She kneeled down and caressed his cheek. “Wake up, Peter. Come on, baby.” 

Peter moaned and rolled over then he sat up and rubbed his eyes as he yawned. “Hi baby. Did you sleep well on the floor?” 

Peter nodded his head and pointed to the window. “I s’eep with daddy.” 

Peppers heart broke. She was selfishly glad that she didn’t have to take care of Peter today. She desperately needed a break from everything. 

“We have to be quick today because I have to go to a meeting.” Pepper said as she tugged Peter’s shirt off his head and then pulled his pants down. As she pulled the pull-up off of Peter, she noticed that it was full. “Aren’t you glad that you slept through the night, Peter? No accidents.” 

Peter nodded his head, still half asleep. He didn’t really care about waking up with a wet bed all the time. His daddy wasn’t here anymore and he didn’t know why he just didn’t know how to hold in his pee anymore. 

“Go pick out an outfit to wear.” Pepper told him as she went into the bathroom to throw out the used pull-ups and grab some wipes. Peter was taking too long to pick out his clothes so she wiped him down while he was trying to find his pants. 

“Hey! No! Don’ like!” Peter yelled and went to kick Pepper. The wipe was cold and Pepper was never as gentle as daddy used to be. 

Pepper sighed. “Peter. I have to clean you and I don’t have time for this.” Pepper continued doing what she was doing even with Peter whining about it. “Look, all done.” 

“I hate you!” Peter screamed and ran to his corner where he curled into a ball. Pepper sighed. She didn’t have time for this but she wasn’t surprised Peter was acting out. 

She ignored him as she grabbed grey track pants and a blue sweater that had a picture of a duck on the front. She then grabbed a fresh pull-up and walked over to Peter. 

“Peter, come on. I told you that I have a meeting to go to.” Pepper saw Peter’s eyes and he wasn’t crying which meant he was just doing this because he didn’t know how to control his sadness or anger sometimes. “I need you to help me, baby.” 

“Wan’ Daddy. Please.” Peter said broken-hearted. 

She nodded then held out his pull-up. “I know, baby, but Uncle Rhodey will be here soon and he can tell you a story about daddy if you come get dressed.” 

Peter sadly nodded as he stood up in front of Pepper and let her dress him. Peter loved hearing stories about Tony no matter what the story was about. 

Pepper thinks it’s because he’s trying to remember his dad since he’s having a hard time trying to remember him on his own. He doesn’t have many memories to go off of and so Peter likes to take other people’s memories and Rhodey has known Tony the longest out of everyone. Ever since Tony was fifteen and Rhodey was nineteen in college. 

Although Peter loved the stories that had him in it since he most likely never remembered that particular memory. 

Pepper was getting his socks on when she spoke. “Remember Peter, if you need to go pee, you tell your teacher and you go. This pull-up is just to stop an accident from happening. Do you understand?” 

Peter nodded his head but he didn’t understand. He wasn’t really listening to Pepper because he saw daddy standing by his window. 

He bounced excitedly on his feet as he waited for Pepper to leave. He tried not to talk to daddy when Pepper was around since she always looked at him funny. Peter thinks it’s because she doesn’t see daddy and she’s mad that he does. Oh well. Daddy must like him the best then. 

After Pepper kissed him on the forehead, she left the room and Peter immediately ran over to the window to talk to daddy.

She was grateful that Rhodey was coming to take Peter to school otherwise she wouldn’t have been able to meet with Obadiah on time. 

Pepper was also grateful for Obadiah because he had been the one to take care of the company with Tony gone. She was lucky to have him. 

“Is Peter still upstairs?” Rhodey asked as he walked into the kitchen and saw Pepper trying to get Peter’s backpack together while attempting to put her heels on. 

“Yes! And I’m leaving his backpack on the table.” Pepper said before she quickly left the mansion, leaving Rhodey with Peter. 

Rhodey watched her leave then headed upstairs to get Peter ready for school.

“Daddy! Daddy! I don’ see you for like ever!” Peter said and fell onto the ground dramatically. He lifted his feet up and started kicking the wall. “Yeah! Do you like ‘em? Peppoo put ‘dem on me!”

Peter continued to giggle and talk to his daddy for a little bit longer but then his bedroom door was opening.

He looked over and saw Uncle Rhodey but then when he looked back at the window, daddy was gone and now he wasn’t happy anymore. Peter crossed his arms and turned away from Rhodey. 

“Hi Peter. I’m gonna take you to school now. Are you ready?” Rhodey asked but Peter turned around to face him. 

“You hafta tell me a daddy story first.” Peter pointed out and stood up so Rhodey could see that he was talking business. 

Rhodey seemed to think about a story for a few seconds but then he sighed. There wasn’t enough time for a story right now. “I’ll tell you a story in the car on the way to school, okay?” 

Peter didn’t like that idea but he wanted a daddy story so he agreed and lifted his arms up for Rhodey to pick him up. Once he was in Rhodey’s arms, the man felt Peter’s bum and it felt weird. He pulled back his pants and saw the pull-up. He knew Peter was potty trained. Tony worked very hard to get him potty trained so why was he wearing a pull-up. “What’s this, bud? Did you put this on or did Pepper?” 

Peter wrapped his arms around Uncle Rhodey’s neck. “Pepper did. He says it ‘cause I pee lots.” 

Rhodey wasn’t sure if that was the truth. He hadn’t heard anything about it from Pepper but he didn’t ask anymore questions to Peter. 

It was easy to get Peter in his car seat since a story was promised. As soon as Rhodey was behind the wheel and started driving, Peter reminded him. “Daddy story now please!”

“Okay. Okay. Let me think for a second,” Rhodey was going to tell a story about when Tony was only fifteen but those weren’t the best ones. He wanted to tell his kid a story that showed how much Tony loved his son. “Okay, I have one.” 

Peter stuck his thumb in his mouth as he waited for the story. 

“Well, this was when you were just four months old.” Rhodey began and Peter listened intently. “Your dad carried you around the house everywhere. He only put you down if he needed to change your smelly diaper or give you a bath. Otherwise, he was always always holding you in his arms. Well one day, your dad had to take a phone call and you were sound asleep on his chest. He didn’t want to wake you so he handed you over to me and went to take the call. Can you guess what happened after that?” 

Peter shook his head with his thumb still in his mouth. Rhodey continued. “You started crying so loudly. As soon as your dad left, you started crying and crying for him,” 

Rhodey paused his story. He planned on telling this story because it was really cute and it just showed everyone how inseparable Tony and Peter used to be but now, saying it out loud, it sounded sad. That was because it was the same situation they were in right now. Tony was gone and Peter didn’t know what to do. No one was able to calm him down. 

Peter whined and kicked his feet on the seat in front of him when Rhodey stopped talking. 

“Okay. Okay, I’m sorry. Where was I? So after your dad left to talk on the phone, um, you wouldn’t stop crying and no one could calm you down but as soon as Tony heard you crying, he immediately came and once he held you in his arms again you stopped crying.” 

Rhodey finished the story, having regretted choosing that one. He looked at Peter in the rearview mirror and watched as he took his thumb out of his mouth and rubbed his eyes. 

“Well-well why don’ daddy come now? I still cryin’ but he no comin’” Peter’s chest started heaving heavily as he rubbed his eyes. 

“I don’t know, Peter. Your dad loves you so much wherever he is.” Rhodey explained. He hated seeing Peter like this. It was harder than not finding Tony no matter how hard he looks. 

“But where is he?” Peter asked innocently. 

Rhodey shook his head. He had absolutely no idea. “I don’t know, buddy. I wish I did.” 

“Me too.” Peter let out a loud sigh. “Is daddy in the stars?” Peter asked. 

“In the stars?” Rhodey looked at Peter confused. He didn’t know what that meant. 

Peter nodded as if it made perfect sense. “Yeah. Daddy’s in heaven which isn’t on the ground so he goes in the stars.” 

Rhodey knew that Peter doesn’t understand death. There’s no way for him to make Peter understand it at his age and it’s just something that he’s going to have to grow up with over time. 

He just didn’t want to give Peter that life. A life without a father. It wasn’t fair to him. 

When Rhodey looked at Peter again, he had his thumb back in his mouth and was looking outside of the car window with a sad look on his face. A look no five year old should have. 

.  
.  
.

Peter was exhausted. 

His eyes were starting to hurt him from staying awake so long but he didn’t want to go to sleep. 

His class was being so loud and the teachers were giving timeout to everyone who wasn’t listening to them but Peter didn’t have to worry about that since he always listened. He stayed in his corner and didn’t talk to anyone. 

A loud bang was heard so Peter turned around and saw a kid standing on the table with a broom in his hand. The other kids were laughing with him as he hit the teacher every time she came close to him. 

Peter didn’t think it was funny because the kid was being bad. It wasn’t fair. The kid was a bad boy and his daddy still got to hug him but Peter was a good boy and his daddy didn’t get to hug him no more. 

He crossed his arms and kicked the wall that was in front of him. It wasn’t fair. Nothing was fair and he hated everything. 

Peter felt someone grab his shoulder then he looked up and saw one of his classmates, Ally. She was annoying and was always bragging about her ugly green shoes that light up. 

“Why are you always in the corner?” Ally asked and Peter hated her a little bit more. 

“I can do what I wan’!” Peter declared and crossed his arms over his chest. 

“Ally, leave Peter alone and come here.” Mr. Robbins called her over but when Peter turned around he saw that his teacher was walking over to him. “Let’s go pee, Peter.” 

When she grabbed Peter’s hand he ripped it out of her grasp. “No! Don’ need to!” 

“Peter. You have to try. Come on.” Ms. Robbins lifted him up by the underarms and then Ally started laughing at him. 

“Peter is wearing a diaper! He’s a baby! Only babies wear diapers!” Ally screamed and pointed to him while Peter kicked to try and get out of his teachers hold. 

“Ally! Stop it! We don’t call people babies. Please go sit on the red chair for fifteen minutes.” Ms. Robbins yelled and picked Peter up so that he was on her hip. Peter laid his head on her shoulder and continued to cry. He wished his daddy was here so he could punch the girl. He hated her. 

Once inside the bathroom, Peter was placed on his feet and he barely had time to register his pants and pull-up being pulled down as he was lifted onto the toilet seat. 

“No! I don’ needa go! No!” Peter hated his teacher now too. She was being rude and he was telling her no but she still made him go pee. He didn’t want to go. 

When he tried to get off the toilet seat, his teacher pushed him back on so Peter started screaming. He wasn’t going to let someone force him to do something he doesn’t want to do. 

“No! No! I don’ Wanna!” Peter cried out and screamed at the top of his lungs. He knew Ms. Robbins was saying something to him but he wasn’t listening. He didn’t care. 

Peter sat off of the toilet seat and went to run out of the bathroom but before he could, his teacher stopped him and pulled his pull-up and pants back up. 

He immediately ran to his corner and continued to cry while his teacher made a phone call to Pepper. 

No one spoke to Peter until Pepper came to pick him up which Peter immediately ran into her arms and he was placed on her hip. He pointed to his teacher and cried. “She’s mean! I hate her!” 

“Peter. No. That’s not nice.” Pepper gave an apologetic look towards Ms. Robbins as she lifted Peter’s pointing arm down. “What happened?”

“I’m sorry but Peter started freaking out. I took him to the bathroom to go pee but he refused to sit on the toilet seat and then started freaking out.” The teacher explained and looked at Peter sadly. “I’m sorry Peter.” 

Peter didn’t respond. He put his head on Peppers shoulder and wrapped his arms around her neck. 

“Thank you for calling me.” Pepper thanked and was handed Peter’s backpack as she carried him to the car. 

He clung to her and started whimpering brokenly. Pepper wondered if he even knew he was doing it anymore or if it just came naturally since he was so used to it by now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Peter is violent now haha he thinks Tony would punch the girl who laughed at him aww


	14. To hold you in my arms again, is like coming up for air

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What we’ve been waiting for! I’m so excited:)   
Also I bought this water filter thing and I’m so excited to stop using plastic bottles so I can use that:) plus it’s cool!

Weeks had passed and Pepper had lost track of how long it’s been. 

Her under eye circles were permanently on her and no matter how much sleep she got they just seemed to be getting worse but that wasn’t a problem compared to what else was happening in her life. 

Peter was becoming very aggressive and didn’t let anyone touch him or even talk to him sometimes unless you could tell him a story about Tony. That also meant that Peter didn’t talk to anyone that didn’t know Tony since they couldn’t offer him anything. 

Pepper was sitting outside of Peter’s bedroom door for the last hour as she drank her now cold cup of coffee. 

She could hear him talking to someone inside his bedroom and had been for the last hour. She had an idea who Peter thought he was talking to. 

It was Friday morning but Peter wasn’t going to go to school today. He also didn’t go yesterday but it was better this way since he was having a hard time in school. 

Pepper took a few breaths of air before she stood up and walked into Peter’s bedroom. 

Peter immediately looked at her and then ran over to the corner of his bedroom so he could hide from her. She knew that this time she couldn’t let Peter win. He was five years old and she was letting him overpower her. 

“Peter. Please. I have to change you otherwise you’ll get a rash.” Pepper explained and sat down on the carpet. She grabbed a pull-up out of the box and the wipes. 

“No. Don’ wan’ to.” Peter shook his head. He wished Pepper could just leave him alone so he could continue to play by himself. 

She sighed. It’s been over two hours since Peter needed a change and if she waited any longer then Peter would get a diaper rash and she definitely didn’t want to deal with that. 

“Peter. Now, I’m not playing with you.” Pepper warned and when Peter still made no move to get up, she stood up and walked over to Peter, ignoring his screaming. 

She carried him over to where she was going to change him and struggled to hold him down as she pulled his pants and pull-up off. She was ready to tie his arms and legs together so she could change him without getting kicked in the face. 

Peter tried to roll onto his stomach to get away from her but she held his ankles so he couldn’t. She managed to wipe him clean but Peter didn’t stop his kicking and screaming and so she gave up on trying to put the new pull-up on. 

“Peter! Stop! You have to stop it.” Pepper pleaded. She was close to tears. Actually, she was surprised she lasted this long without crying. She was exhausted both mentally and physically. 

Peter mumbled something that she wasn’t sure since she couldn’t understand what he was saying between his cries and sad hiccuping. 

She let go of his legs and watched him crawl into the corner again before she stood up and went into the bathroom in the hallway to cry. 

This whole situation was exhausting and she knew Peter didn’t know any better but she just wished he did so this could be a little bit easier on her. 

She immediately felt selfish for thinking that. 

Peter’s dad was gone and he didn’t know how to handle the loss so he was acting out and here she was wishing for him to behave just so it would be easier on her. She was a horrible person. 

Pepper sank down to her knees and bit her hand so she didn’t make a sound as she cried. After a few minutes, she stood up and looked in the mirror. 

Her face was pale with the only colour being her under eye circles. Her eyes were puffy and red from all the crying that she had been doing. 

Just then, her phone rang in her pocket so she quickly pulled it out and saw that it was Rhodey calling. Her heart skipped a few beats as she pressed answer and slowly bringing the phone up to her ear. 

She knew when Rhodey called it either meant good news or bad news and it hasn’t been good news yet so she bet on it being more bad news. She just prayed to whatever was out there that it wasn’t the call. 

“Hello?” Pepper spoke into the phone. Her voice sounded exhausted. 

“Pepper.” Rhodey spoke like he just came up for air. “I think we found him.” 

Pepper covered her hand over her mouth as a sob escaped from her. She tried to speak but no words left her mouth. 

“There was an explosion and we believe it’s because of him.” Rhodey paused and Pepper heard a loud engine in the background before he continued again. “We’re going to go check it out right now but I don’t know what to expect.” 

Pepper nodded her head. “O-okay. So… Tony could be alive? He could be alive.” 

“I don’t know.” Rhodey sounded hopeful but hope was a scary thing. “I don’t want you to get your hopes up.” 

“Okay. What do I tell Peter?” Pepper asked. She prayed so badly that Tony was okay and alive. 

“Don’t tell Peter anything. Not yet. Not until I have some news, I don’t want to crush him if this turns bad. He’ll never come back from that.” Rhodey paused and Pepper heard loud voices in the background. “I gotta go, Pep. I’ll call you as soon as I hear something.” 

Rhodey hung up the phone before Pepper had the chance to say anything else. 

She braced her hands on the bathroom counter and looked into her own eyes. She prayed so hard that Rhodey found Tony alive. 

Pleasepleaseplease was replaying in her head like a mantra as she walked back into Peter’s bedroom to put his pull-up back on. 

She walked in and saw him playing with his bear again as if he hadn’t just screamed as if Pepper was going to throw him out of the window. 

She decided to sit with Peter and talk with him before she put him in a bad mood again. Peter looked up at her and his face immediately scrunched up as he let out a loud whine. 

“What are you playing, Peter?” She asked him. Peter looked unsure of everything. It looked like he knew it was a trap but he still wanted to play so he settled on explaining to her. 

“My bear. He’s my friend.” Peter said as he lifted his bear up and hugged him tightly. He put his bear down and picked up a dragon and handed it to Pepper. “‘Dis for you.”

“Hmm thank you. He’s very pretty.” Pepper observed and hugged the dragon to her chest like Peter just did. 

They ended up playing for over an hour together. Peter barely smiled the whole time and Pepper noticed that he separated all of the toys in his room from each other. Where there used to be a huge pile of toys on the floor, now all those toys were spread out so that they weren’t near each other. 

Pepper had asked Peter why he did that but Peter had said they did it themselves and he was adamant that they did even after she said they didn’t do she gave up on that. 

Peter didn’t eat dinner no matter how hard Pepper tried to get him to eat. She sat him on her lap and tried to feed him but after three bites, he was done so she put him to bed. 

Pepper was well aware that Peter was losing weight. Too much weight but she couldn’t do anything, he wouldn’t eat no matter what she did. 

That worry along with everything else that was going on had Pepper sitting on the couch at five in the morning instead of in bed. 

She was exhausted but at this point the exhaustion was bearable since she was so used to it. She stayed up and waited. For anything. For a miracle. For Rhodey to call her and tell her that Tony was alive and okay but she knew that wasn’t going to happen. 

An explosion was an explosion and that meant people died. Tony died. If he wasn’t already dead. 

Her mind raced with hundreds of scenarios playing in her head but was soon stopped by her phone ringing on the coffee table in front of her. 

This is it. Pepper picked up the phone and held it to her ear as she stood up and unconsciously held her breath. 

“We got him.” Rhodey said into the phone. “We got him, Pepper. Tony’s alive.” 

Pepper let out a loud sob as she fell to her knees and cried. It was a happy cry which was so different in comparison to how she would cry before. 

“You got him? You got him.” Pepper cried out. She felt her heart racing in her chest and she wasn’t sure if she was even awake. Maybe she was dreaming?

Rhodey broke her away from her thoughts. “Yes. Yes, I have him. We’re on a plane, he’s getting checked out but we’ll be landing at the private airport in three hours.” 

“Okay. Oh my god. Thank you, Rhodey. Thank you. We’ll be there.” Pepper cried out and hung the phone up. She cried loudly to herself, not caring if she woke Peter since she would be doing that now anyways. 

She stood on shaky legs and quickly made it to Peter’s bedroom before throwing open the bedroom door and turning on the bedroom light. 

“Peter. Baby. Wake up.” Pepper kneeled by his bed and gently shook him awake. She couldn’t get the smile off her face and she had to wipe away a tear that rolled down her cheek. 

Peter let out a whine and rolled over in bed. He opened his eyes while he rubbed them and looked at Pepper. 

“Your daddy’s coming home, Peter.” Pepper cried out but she was happy. She was so happy. 

Peter sat up in bed and she rubbed his back. “Daddy?” 

She nodded. “Yeah, baby. Daddy’s coming home. Uncle Rhodey found him. He’s coming home to you Peter. We gotta go to the airport to get him.” 

A huge smile broke across Peter’s face and then his face scrunched up and he started crying. He reached his arms out for Pepper and she grabbed him off his bed and into her arms. 

“Aren’t you happy, baby?” Pepper asked and Peter nodded his head. 

“Y-yeah. I wan’ daddy.” Peter cried out and started hiccuping. 

For once Pepper could give Peter what he had so badly wanted this entire time. “Let’s go get your daddy.” 

Peter continued to cry on Peppers shoulder. She knew it was because he was feeling so many emotions at once and he didn’t know how to react to it. 

She grabbed a pair of socks and shoes as she sat him on the floor to put those on for him. She didn’t want to change him out of his pyjamas since she wanted to leave right now. 

On the way out of the mansion, she put a warmer sweater on Peter and walked out to the car with him where Happy was already waiting. 

The car ride to the airport was silent except for Peter asking every minute if they were there yet. He stopped crying but he was still breathing very heavily. 

Once Happy pulled up to the private airport runway, he parked the car and Peter was already aggressively trying to take his car seat buckles off. 

“Out! Wan’ out!” Peter whined desperately and pointed out the window. 

“The plane hasn’t even landed yet, baby.” Pepper told him but she still undid the car seat buckles and let him climb out of his seat. 

As she got out of the car, she was worried that Peter would start running around but as soon as he climbed out, he looked around and lifted his arms up to her so she placed him on his hip. 

Peter, Happy and Pepper all walked towards where there was a group of people waiting on the tarmac. There was an Ambulance close by which scared Pepper since she didn’t know anything about what happened or where he was this whole time. 

All of a sudden there was a loud noise heard and when she looked up, Pepper could see the plane coming in for a landing. She smiled and pointed up in the sky to show Peter. 

“Look Peter. Here comes your dad.” Peter bounced on her hip and clapped his hands together as he looked up in the sky at the plane. 

It felt like an eternity before the plane was landing and the hatch door was opening. Pepper unconsciously held her breath. 

This was the moment that she has been hoping and praying for the day she found out that Tony wouldn’t be coming home that Friday. This moment was it. 

Peter started kicking his legs in anticipation as the hatch door opened fully and you could make out two silhouettes of what would have to be Rhodey and Tony. 

The light shone down on them and Peppers eyes landed on Tony the same time Peter’s must have because he screamed and kicked his legs to be put down. 

“Daddy! Daddy!” Peter cried out. As soon as his feet hit the ground he made a beeline towards Tony, almost tripping over his feet and falling on his face while doing so. 

Tony walked out of the plane, his eyes immediately started looking for his son waiting for him. He hadn’t seen or held his son for over three months and he missed him like a drug. 

The plane ride was the worst. He couldn’t stop moving around and counting down the hours until he could hold his son in his arms in real life and not just on those lucky nights where he dreamt about holding Peter. 

Tony’s eyes immediately landed on Peter in Peppers arms and it was like they made eye contact at the same time because Peter was out of Peppers arms and running at full speed towards him. 

He couldn’t wait any longer. Tony had to hold Peter and he had to hold him now. 

“Daddy! Daddy!” God he missed that sound. 

Tony kneeled down just in time for Peter to crash into him. Tony felt like he could finally breathe. Like holding Peter in his arms again after so long was like a breath of fresh air. 

Peter was practically climbing on him as he tried to press his body as close to his as possible. Tony wrapped the arm that wasn’t currently in an arm brace around his son. His son. God how he missed him. 

“Daddy. Daddy.” Peter whimpered out and Tony held him even closer. 

“I’m here, baby. Daddy’s here now. I’m here.” Tony said into Peter’s hair. He took a huge sniff because he missed his kids smell. He missed everything about him so fucking much. 

As soon as Peter heard his dad's voice after months of nothing, he let out a loud sob and tried to climb into Tony’s arms even more. 

Tony used his free arm to place it under Peter’s butt so he could hold him and stand with him safety in his arms where he was meant to be. 

Tony knew that Peter would cling onto him either way but he still tried to hold his kid closer to himself. He would never let him go. Never again. 

Tony walked over to Pepper and smiled weakly at her. “He missed you so much.” 

Tony smiled then leaned his head into Peter’s curls. “What about you? Did you miss me?” 

Pepper only smiled at him. He would have hugged her if he wasn’t holding his kid in his one free arm. Well maybe not since he would probably use that arm to hug Peter closer to himself. 

Happy led them to the car and Tony climbed in first, ignoring Peter’s car seat so he could hold Peter in his arms. Pepper slid in after him and put her seatbelt on. 

“Take us to the hospital, Happy.” Pepper told Happy as he started the car then turned to Tony once she saw that Tony wasn’t putting Peter in his car seat and didn’t plan on it. “And Tony, put Peter in his car seat.” Pepper told him but Tony shook his head. 

“No and no. Take me to the press conference, Hap. But first, I want an American cheeseburger. And Peter stays with me.” Tony pressed a kiss to Peter’s head. The first kiss in over three months. 

“Tony-” Pepper warned but was cut off. 

“No. I’ve been in captivity for three months. There are two things I want, an American cheeseburger and… to hold my son. Drive Happy.” Tony held Peter closer to himself and when he hand touched his butt he felt something oddly familiar to something he knew Peter didn’t need anymore. 

Tony pulled back the elastic on Peter’s pyjama pants and saw that he was wearing a diaper. “Why is Peter wearing a diaper?” Tony asked Pepper and looked over at her. 

She looked at him sadly. “Tony. It’s been… hard. Peter has been wetting his pants in the nighttime and in the day, so this was the only option.” 

Tony only nodded his head. He knew he had it bad in that cave in Afghanistan and he always knew it was bad at home as well so he wasn’t surprised that Peter had to go back to wearing diapers. He just wasn’t excited to hear everything else that happened with his kid while he was gone. 

Peter pulled his face out of Tony’s chest and looked at him with a pout. It was the first time Tony was seeing his face in over three months and he couldn’t stop himself from grabbing the side of his face and really look at him. He missed Peter so fucking much. 

Peter leaned into the touch even as he pouted. “Not diapers. Pull-ups.” 

Tony smiled, a genuine true smile. “Oh I understand now, Peter. Pull-ups. Not diapers.” 

Peter nodded his head and laid himself back on Tony’s chest. Tony never thought he would hold his son in his arms again. 

Happy pulled up to the drive through window and started ordering Tony’s order, he knew what the man always got. “Peter? Pepper?” Happy asked. 

Tony spoke for them. “Peter will have a kiddie cheeseburger with extra pickles and Pepper will have-”

“No Tony. I don’t want anything.” Pepper stopped him. Tony glared at her but she eyed him so he sighed. 

When they got their burgers, Tony hated having to leave Peter’s hold for a quick second as he unwrapped his burger and took a huge bite. He gestured Peter’s burger to him but Peter shook his head and Tony turned to Pepper. 

Then it hit him. Since when has he ever turned to someone else to get them to help him with his son. As much as it hurt him, Pepper knew Peter better than he knew him. 

“He doesn’t eat anything anymore.” Pepper whispered to him. 

Tony felt like he got slapped in the face. His kid didn’t eat anything anymore because he was so sad and hurt and he had been gone. 

He gestured his own burger to Peter’s mouth, knowing that Peter always ate his own food instead of his. “Want a bite, baby?” 

Peter looked at the burger before shaking his head. “No. Wan’ you.” 

Tony could have cried in relief. He was terrified that while he was gone Peter would learn how to pronounce his ‘Ts’ when he would say ‘want’ and ‘don’t’ and he’s so glad that Peter didn’t learn how just yet. 

“I’m here, Peter. I’m here.” Peter whimpered against his chest and Tony held him just a little bit tighter. 

When they arrived at the press conference building, Pepper got out first and Tony shoved the last piece of his burger in his mouth before grabbing Peter and climbing out of the car. 

Flashes started going off and Peter shoved his face in his neck like he always did when the cameras were around. 

Obadiah walked up to Tony. “Tony! I’m so glad you’re back and you’re okay! Want me to take the kid?” 

Tony heard the whimper that escaped Peter’s mouth and Tony held him tighter. “Nope. My kid stays with me.” 

Tony would make this announcement short and simple so he could go home and be with his baby.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to make peter jump up and down in excitement but I didn’t think that would have been realistic. Pepper told him his dad is coming home after months of ppl telling him he was dead and in heaven so I don’t think he would have known how to process that. It would have been different for the excitement part if she told him he was going to the park type thing


	15. I’m sorry to hear that

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii guys:) I love writing this fic sooo much and I’m so excited to write the upcoming chapters but I don’t have any time to write which suckkkssss but I hope you guys like this:))

Tony knew that Obadiah was mad at him. 

Mad was an understatement but Tony didn’t give a shit. 

He was going to be home with his son in less than five minutes and all he wanted to do was hold Peter and never let go. 

Happy dropped them off and Tony immediately followed Pepper out of the car and raced to the front door with his kid. Tony opened the door by typing in the password but it wasn’t working so he turned to Pepper confused. “Let me in. Why can’t I get in?” 

“I had to change the password because Peter kept running outside.” Pepper explained and typed in the new password. 

Tony walked in and looked around. 

It seemed… different. There weren’t any toys by the front door like there always was since Peter liked to push his trucks on the floor. It just seemed dark. 

“Welcome home, Boss.” Jarvis said and Tony smiled. He missed his AI. “I calculated your return home being very slim. It was-”

“Okay, Jarvis. Enough.” Tony waved him off and walked into the living room. He sat down on the couch and let go of Peter for a second so he could take that stupid arm brace off. He didn’t need it anyways. 

Tony looked at Peter as he was seated on his lap with a leg on either side of Tony’s. He tried to see if Peter looked different. If he looked older. 

Maybe he did but his brain wouldn’t let him notice it because he didn’t want to miss out on his kid growing up. 

“I missed you so much, Peter.” Tony admitted as he placed his hands on Peter’s hips to press another kiss to his cheek. 

“I missed you too daddy.” Peter giggled with Tony kissing his face which caused him to do it more. 

Pepper walked over to the two and smiled. It’s been so long since she’s heard Peter giggle like that. Too long. 

“Peter needs to get changed since it’s been awhile since I last changed him.” Pepper told Tony then sat down on the couch since she knew that Tony would happily go change his kid. 

“Yeah! I got it. I’ll do it.” Tony stood up with a groan and placed Peter on the floor then grabbed his hand and started walking with him up to his bedroom. 

When they got to the top of the stairs, Peter started tugging Tony towards his bedroom but Tony was trying to go to his own bedroom where Peter always took his baths, went to the bathroom and everything else. 

“Where are you going, baby? My bathroom is this way.” Tony tried to pull Peter his way but Peter shook his head. 

“No. Pepper says no goin’ in your room so I don’.” Peter explained and yanked on Tony’s hand. It was a hard and aggressive yank that Peter had never done before. He was always so gentle and loving. 

“Well… how about we go into your bathroom tonight to take your bath then tomorrow night we can go into my bathroom?” Tony suggested a Peter lead him towards his own bedroom. 

“No. I hate baths.” Peter said then let go of Tony’s hand and raised his arms up to be picked up. “Wan’ up, daddy.” 

As Tony picked Peter up and held him with one hand under his butt and the other on his back, he thought about what Peter had just said. He hates baths. Since when did his son hate baths? That was their favourite time of the day and they always had so much fun at bath time. 

Peter looked at him and Tony looked at him back so they were both staring at each other. Tony wasn’t sure what Peter was thinking but Tony was thinking about everything that he missed. 

He missed his son's fifth birthday. Peter now hates baths. He’s aggressive. What else?

Tony also noticed how Peter looks… different. He doesn’t necessarily look older but he still looks different. He’s a lot more skinnier which Tony wants to immediately fix and he has huge dark bags under his eyes that shouldn’t be on a four year old… a five year old. 

There’s also this sadness in Peter’s eyes. It looks like there’s nothing in them. Just emptiness and Tony hates seeing that. 

Peter places his hands on Tony’s face and concentrated on him. “Everyone said you’re dead.” 

Okay. Tony was not expecting that but he supposed he should have. “I’m here now, baby. I’m not dead.” 

Peter let’s go of Tony’s face and wraps his skinny arms around Tony’s neck. “Yeah. I knowd that.” 

Tony laughs weakly. “You knew that, buddy.” 

Peter only nods so Tony carries him into the bathroom and looks around for his pull-ups or wipes. He finds them next to the door and then tries to set Peter on his feet but Peter wraps his arms and legs around Tony tighter and lets out a loud whine. “No! No leave.” 

“I’m not leaving again, baby. I just need to change you.” Tony used one hand to lean down and pick up a pack of wipes and kick the box of pull-ups into the bedroom. 

He sat down on the floor and waited for Peter to loosen his grip on him. Once he did, Tony laid him down in front of him and got some strong flashbacks to baby Peter. 

He remembers all the times when Peter was still in diapers and he laid him on the floor in this very same position and same spot so he could change his diaper. Tony would always be the one to change Peter no matter how nasty it was because he wanted to do everything for his son and not hand him off to someone else the minute things get hard. 

Tony pulled down Peter’s pants and tossed them to the side. He paused and looked at Peter’s face who was watching him with his thumb in his mouth. 

“I love you so much, Peter. I missed you so much.” Tony felt a tear slide down his cheek and he waited for Peter to get up and wipe it away like he always did on the rare occasions that Tony cried in front of him. Although no tiny hands were wiping his face. 

He looked at Peter who was looking at him but he couldn’t stop himself from leaning down and pressing a kiss to his son's cheek. Peter giggled which made Tony let out another tear. He missed that sound so fucking much. 

“Daddy,” Peter giggled out so Tony stopped and sat back up. 

Tony then went to upstrap the pull-up and pull it out from under Peter. He tossed it to the side and grabbed a wipe so he could start wiping Peter. “How did this happen, bud?” Tony asked him. 

“I wen’ pee.” Peter explained innocently and Tony laughed. 

He was referring to Peter wearing diapers again after he spent so long trying to potty train him when he was almost three. Tony knows how it happened but he was just thinking out loud. 

“Lift your legs up,” Tony instructed then finished wiping and grabbed a clean pull-up. “What do you want to do after, baby?” 

Peter took his thumb out of his mouth and let out a sigh as he pointed to Tony. “Wan’ to stay with you, daddy. Miss you.” 

“I’m not leaving you ever again, Peter. I’m staying right here with you.” Tony put the pull-up on Peter and then lifted him into his arms to press more kisses to his face. He even missed Peter’s smell so goddamn much. 

“I miss you.” Peter felt like he could finally breathe now that daddy was back but it almost didn’t feel real. Like he was going to wake up and Pepper would be there to calm him down while daddy was nowhere to be seen. 

Peter decided that he just couldn’t wake up again and if that meant not going to sleep then so be it. 

.  
.  
.

It was a lazy day. A boring day. 

Just the way Tony and Peter liked it. Tony has been praying to a god he didn’t believe in to have just one more of these days with his baby boy and now he has got to have a million more. 

He carried Peter everywhere with him. It was hard to put him down when he spent three whole months without his child in his arms and he didn’t want to ever feel that emptiness ever again. 

Tony was still getting used to being home. Home. It was such a weird thing. The mansion didn’t even really feel like home. Being with Peter felt like home. 

Although it was still hard for him. The fridge had so much food yet nothing looked appealing and so when Pepper made some chicken, mashed potatoes and corn, Tony didn’t want it and neither did Peter. 

He knew what it was like to look at food and feel sick at just the thought of eating it so Tony would let it slide for tonight. It was his first day back so he didn’t want or feel like pushing Peter or even himself to eat anything at that moment. 

Tony looked down at his kid in his arms and hugged him tightly to his chest, ignoring the sharp pain that ran through his body at the shrapnel in his chest and slowly making his way into his heart. He shifted uncomfortably and then made brief eye contact with Pepper who was looking at him with some hidden message in her eyes. Tony looked away. 

“I’m taking Peter to bed.” Tony announced to Pepper and moved to stand up with Peter still in his arms but Peter threw his head back at the sentence and let out a scream. 

“No! No bed! No sleep!” Peter cling onto Tony impossibly tighter but Tony liked the embrace. He was only as strong as a five years old could be so it was like a tight hug to Tony. 

“Do you want to sleep with daddy then?” Tony asked. He didn’t plan on letting Peter out of his sight for one second. He also didn’t plan on sleeping at all but he would sit in his bed with Peter so his baby could get some sleep. 

Peter seemed to weigh out the pros and cons before nodding his head. “I stay with you but no sleepin’.” 

“I’ll do whatever you want.” Tony kissed Peter’s head again as he left Pepper and started walking up the stairs to his bedroom. He knew he should acknowledge Pepper but doing that meant talking about what happened to him, what he did and where he was this whole time. It also meant talking about what Peter did, how he was and the reason he’s back in pull-ups again. He didn’t want to talk about all that right now. 

Tony walked into his bedroom and set Peter on his bed. “No, daddy. Hold me.” 

Tony smiled. “I’m going to. I have to change the dirty sheets. I can see that they haven’t been changed in three months.” 

Peter stood up on the bed and started to take the bedding off with his daddy. Tony’s arm was still hurting him a lot. There was a dull ache as he lifted it to get the bedding off the bed but it was nothing compared to the pain in his chest. 

He wanted to go down to his lab and run some tests on himself as well as work on some other stuff that he had in mind. Although his first priority at that moment was Peter. It would always be Peter. 

Once the bedding was off, a Pepper walked in with clean bed sheets to help the two boys out. When Peter saw Pepper walk into the bedroom, he stood on the bed and pointed a finger at her. “No! Go ‘way! It’s just me and my daddy in here! Not you!” 

Tony wasn’t expecting that from Peter at all. “Peter. That wasn’t very nice. Say sorry.” 

Pepper didn’t look surprised by Peter’s outburst which scared Tony since that meant that she was used to him acting that way. 

“No! You aren’t nice for leaving me! I hate you!” Peter turned to Tony to yell at him. If Tony’s heart wasn’t already broken he knew it would have been after that. 

“Peter. Enough.” Pepper budded in and grabbed Peter’s arm to drag him off the bed. “If you can’t be nice to your daddy then you’re coming with me.” 

“No! No-o! Off of me! Daddy, help!” Peter cried out and tried to reach for Tony so he reached forward and grabbed his kid out of Peppers arms. He hugged his kid to his chest tightly, not wanting to let go of him. 

He was exhausted and he knew that Peter was exhausted as well so he would have to get both himself and Peter to sleep after he gets Peter settled down. “It’s okay. We’re okay.” Tony told Pepper so she could leave the two alone. 

“How about we finish making the bed and then we get some sleep? Sound good?” Tony asked Peter. He put him on the floor and watched as Peter shoved his thumb in his mouth, nodding his head. 

Tony did most of the work by putting on new sheets, pillowcases and putting the comforter onto the bed. Peter immediately lifted his arms up to Tony so he could be placed on the bed. Tony climbed into after him and got under the blankets. 

He let out a content sigh. Peter was safe and in his arms. He was safe. He wasn’t in the cave in Afghanistan anymore. 

Tony doesn’t even remember the last time he got a decent good night's rest. It’s been longer than three months but he knows he’s not gonna be getting that tonight. He will stay for as long as Peter needs him to stay. 

Peter crawled onto Tony’s chest. They were stomach to stomach with Peter’s legs stretched out over Tony’s but only reaching to about his knees. Peter looked up at his daddy with his big brown eyes. “Why’d you leave me, daddy? I missed you so much.” 

Tony gently cupped Peter’s cheek. “I missed you too, baby. I didn’t want to leave you and I’m sorry.” 

Peter went to rest his head on Tony’s chest. “I’ll always hate you for leaving me.” 

Tony felt a sharp sting of pain shoot through his chest before Peter even laid his head down over his new addition to his body. When Peter’s head rested over his arc reactor, Tony flinched the same time Peter flinched. 

Tony held his breath as Peter snapped his head up and looked at Tony’s chest offended. He tried to put his head back down again but then his head snapped right back up. 

Confused, Peter sat up on Tony with a leg on either side of him so he could investigate what was going on with his sleeping spot. “What that?” 

Tony sat up a bit, holding Peter by his back so he didn’t fall off of him. Peter tried to lift his shirt up but when Tony didn’t let him, he tried to look down the top of his shirt. “Daddy stop. Let me see.” 

“No, Pete.” Tony didn’t want to scare his kid. The scars would heal a bit but they were still really bad. 

“What happened, daddy?” Peter asked in a small voice.

“Daddy got hurt while he was gone.” Tony explained. He wasn’t sure how else to explain to his five year old son what happened to him. Maybe one day when he’s older, like when he’s twenty years old. 

Peter’s bottom lip started to wobble. “Daddy’s hurt? What happened?” 

“Well, my heart isn’t as strong as it used to be, baby. It got hurt three months ago.” Tony explained. Peter lifted up his shirt and pointed to his heart. 

“My heart got hurt three months ago too.” Peter explained so innocently that Tony has to hold back the urge to pull Peter into his arms. 

“I know, baby. I’m sorry.” 

“But… if your heart is hurt then that means that you can’t love me anymore.” The five year old explained sadly as a tear fell down his cheek. 

Tony started shaking his head. “No. No baby, that’s not true, daddy will always love you with every single thing I have. Always.” 

“Okay. That makes me feel happy.” Peter stuck his thumb back in his mouth and moved down a bit so that he could rest his head just under the arc reactor. 

Tony rested his head against his pillow and waited for Peter to drift off into a deep sleep. It took a lot longer than Tony was used to, usually his kid sleeps really well and is out in minutes but it took Peter a good hour to fully fall asleep. Tony found comfort in Peter’s chest rising and falling. 

After lying there with his kid for over two hours, Tony started to get anxious so he carefully picked Peter up and placed him on the bed next to him so he wasn’t attached to his kid anymore. He hated not being in arm reach with his baby after three months of not seeing him but he couldn’t sleep and he needed to move around. 

So Tony quietly left the bedroom and made his way downstairs where Pepper was sitting on the couch with her laptop on her lap. He tried to see what she was doing on there but he found that he didn’t really care. He was more focused on Pepper herself. 

He sat down next to her, close but not touching. “Peter’s sleeping. I’m guessing that he doesn’t sleep for long anymore.” 

Pepper didn’t look surprised that he was there. She closed her computer to give Tony her full attention. She shook her head. “No. He doesn’t.” 

There was silence between the two for a few seconds before Tony spoke. “So how bad was it?” 

Pepper turned her full body toward him and leaned back. Tony saw that she looked like she wanted to cry but he assumed that she got really good at holding that in over the past three months for his kids sake. “Bad. I didn’t-I didn’t think you were coming back, Tony. I thought you were dead.” 

Tony nodded. He assumed as much. 

She continued. “At first I had hoped that you were coming back but as the days passed by, I lost all hope and-and it was hard. It was so hard and Peter… he didn’t know how to cope. I-I had to tell him that-that… that you went to heaven just so he could start moving on. So we all could start moving on.” 

Tony nodded along. He knew that they would eventually move on without him. They had to so he wasn’t mad at Pepper for telling his kid that he was dead. 

“Peter, he… I was giving him a bath one day and he wanted you there. He missed you so much and he didn’t understand why all the other kids could get hugs from their dads but he couldn’t.” Pepper paused so she could push her tears back. “He-he wanted to go to heaven just to see you and-and I just broke down after I put him to bed. He didn’t understand.” 

Tony knew there was more. That there was three months worth of horrible stories about Peter and three months worth of trauma that might have changed Peter for the rest of his life. 

“Thank you. For taking care of him.” Tony didn’t look at her when he spoke but he would be forever grateful for Pepper for taking care of his baby when he wasn’t able to. 

“Yeah. He was the only one that kept me sane.” Pepper laughed sadly then looked at Tony with red rimmed eyes. “What happened to you?” 

Tony flinched. He didn’t know what Pepper knew, the gory details of it and he wasn’t sure he would ever tell her all of it. 

“What do you know?” He asked. They would start there. 

“I-I know that you were kidnapped. Rhodey told me that just before you landed. I know you were found in the middle of a desert after spending three months in a cave.” Pepper paused. “That’s all I know.” 

“That’s basically it then.” That was all Pepper needed to know. He wouldn’t go into the details of his three months and how his hands were constantly shaking from the cold. How he barely ate enough to survive and the torture, the water boarding on top of the arc reactor in his chest that felt like he was going to drop dead from that alone at any second. 

“Tony, tell me. I need to know.” Peppers' voice broke and she tried to reach for him but he moved away from her. 

“Please. I know there’s something big that you’re not telling me.” Pepper asked pleadingly. 

Tony closed his eyes and sighed. He was exhausted. Mentally and physically. 

He lifted up the bottom of his shirt until it reached the top of his chest, revealing the hole in the middle of his chest where the arc reactor was. The area around it was still red with dried up blood and some new blood. A lot of the scars were visible still but Tony wasn’t sure that they would ever go away. 

Now that he had access to a clean environment, a somewhat healthy diet and medical attention, he could heal around the edges just a bit but that’s it. 

“Oh my god.” Pepper whispered and leaned closer to look at it. Tony watched her closely. He knew that she wouldn’t touch him but she was getting too close for his liking so he dropped his shirt and shuffled away from her a bit. “Tony.” 

He looked at her, not knowing what to say. 

“It’s a part of me now. I’d be dead without it.” 

“Does Peter know? Did he see?” She asked, scared of the answer. 

Tony nodded. He didn’t want to ever tell Peter but he had no choice when Peter climbed on top of him. “Yeah. He found it when he was lying on top of me.” 

“Was he scared?” She asked. 

“No. No. He wasn’t. I don’t think anything will scare him now.” Tony laughed weakly. Peter went through something that no five year old should ever have to go through. 

As if on cue, Peter appeared next to the couch holding his teddy bear tightly against his chest. “Daddy. You left me again.” 

Tony held out his arms for Peter and waited for his baby to immediately run over to him so Tony pulled him off the floor and onto his lap. “I’m here, baby.” 

Peter stuck his thumb in his mouth and closed his eyes, pushing his face into Tony’s chest. He hummed in contentment as Tony patted his butt like he used to do when Peter was a baby. 

“Let’s go back up.” Tony kissed Peter on the forehead as he stood with Peter cradled in his arms. 

He carried Peter back upstairs to his bedroom and adjusted Peter so that he was holding him with one arm then with the other arm he grabbed a pull-up from Peter’s diaper box and then grabbed the wipes. 

As Tony walked over to his bed and laid Peter on his back, he thought about the diaper era with Peter. He didn’t miss it with all the poop he had to clean up but he wasn’t all that different now since he still wipes Peter’s bum after he went poop but at least he did that in the toilet. 

Tony needed to do some research on how to potty train a four… wait five year old. 

He tugged off Peter’s pyjama pants and pulled off his pull-up just as Peter woke up. “No. Wan’ it on. No daddy.” 

Tony hushed him. “I will but I have to put a clean one on you so you can sleep.” 

Peter whined and watched Tony when Pepper walked into the room. She sat on the bed next to Peter who ignored her because he was still focused on his dad. Tony began wiping Peter as he looked at her, waiting for her to speak. 

“I um, I was doing some research and I spoke to a child specialist and she told me that this is temporary.” Pepper spoke as if she was reading Tony’s mind. “Peter will eventually stop wetting himself and won’t need his pull-ups anymore. He just needs to get used to you being back now.” 

Tony grabbed the clean pull-up and nodded then sat on the edge of the bed so that Peter was lying between them. “So I don’t have to potty train him again then.” He laughed sadly. 

Peter sat up and tried to reach for his dad but Tony held him down so he could quickly put his pull-up on. “Wait Petey. Daddy needs to put this on you first.” 

Peter waited for Tony to put the pull-up on him then he lifted his arms up so Tony lifted his baby in his arms and rocked him side to side. 

Pepper got up and left without saying a word but Tony was glad that she was gone so he could be alone with his son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys liked that:) it was fun to write


	16. To let my heart feel how it feels

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii guys!!! It’s been so long but I’m here with a short chapter ahhh read the end notes to understand:)

Tony had been awake for hours by the time Peter woke up. 

He knew he wasn’t gonna be able to sleep so it wasn’t a surprise to him when he actually tried to fall asleep but wasn’t able to. His mind was racing with thoughts about Peter. Everything was always about Peter which he usually didn’t mind but now he had to deal with his kid who had to deal with his dad's death but then his dad came back to him. 

Tony rolled over on the bed and looked at his kid. Peter was sleeping on his stomach with his butt up in the air which was his usual sleeping position and Tony hoped that Peter never grew out of it because it was the cutest thing. 

But now here he was, sitting at the kitchen counter at eight in the morning when Jarvis announced that Peter was awake and in distress. 

Tony immediately stopped what he was doing and made his way to his bedroom where he found Peter sitting up in the middle of his giant bed and crying loudly. His hair was all over the place and sticking up at every angle from the way he was sleeping but once Peter saw Tony he immediately lifted his arms up for his daddy and started whining. 

“Daddy. Daddy up.” Peter cried out as Tony walked around the bed and pulled his son into his arms. He pressed a bunch of kisses to the side of his face and bounced him on his hip to try and get him to calm down. 

“I’m here now, Pete. Just breathe. I’m here, baby.” Tony whispered into his ear. He walked around his bedroom, opening up the blinds so that the sunlight could brighten up the room. 

“N- no. I-I wake up and-and you not here, daddy.” Peter only cried harder and it hit Tony; Peter was terrified of not being with him. 

“I know, baby, and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left you, I just went into the kitchen.” Tony explained to his kid who was now hiccuping sadly. 

Peter wrapped his arms around Tony’s neck tightly and shoved his wet face into Tony’s shoulder. Tony patted his back all the way to Peter’s bedroom so Tony could change him into some clothes for the day and a new pull-up. 

Tony placed Peter on his feet and grabbed some track pants out of Peter’s dresser and a blue dinosaur top. “Come lay down in front of me, Petey.” 

Peter grabbed one of his teddy bears and laid down in front of Tony as he looked up at his father. “I missed you so much, daddy. I cried for you every night.” 

That broke Tony’s heart. When he was in the Afghanistan cave, he often thought about what Peter was doing and how he was basically coping with his father’s death. 

“I know, baby. I missed you too.” Tony said sadly then pulled off Peter’s pants and his wet pull-up. He grabbed the wipes and wiped Peter clean then helped him into a standing position and helped him step into his clean pull-up. 

“Daddy?” Peter asked. 

“Yeah, baby?” Tony finished pulling the pull-up into Peter’s waist and grabbed his pants. 

“Can we eat pancakes with chocolate chips for breakfast?” Peter asked with a giggle. 

Tony missed his baby boy so freaking much. He reached forward and pulled Peter closer to him so he could press a bunch of kisses to his face. “I love you so much, Peter.” 

“Daddy! Stop! Tickles!” Peter giggled out so Tony let him go and picked his pants back up. “No pants, daddy. Take my shirt off too.” 

“You have to wear your pants, baby. What if someone comes by and sees you in your underwear?” Tony poked Peter in the stomach after he took off his pyjama top. 

Peter shook his head. “S’not underwear, daddy. It’s my pull-ups.” 

“Oh okay. I’m sorry for calling them something else then.” Tony said jokingly and smiled at his kid who had his hands on his hip and was looking at him. 

“It’s okay, daddy. I forgive you.” 

“So,” Tony held out the pants one more time. “Pants or no pants today?” 

Peter smacked the track pants in Tony’s hand. “No pants! And no top either!” 

Tony wasn’t about to argue with Peter over something ridiculous. He hasn’t seen his kid for over three months so he has the right to do whatever he wants with Peter and Peter can do whatever he wants as well. 

He stood up and held his arms out for Peter who lifted his arms up so Tony could hold him on his hip. “Off to the kitchen we go!” 

Tony sat Peter down on the counter and started taking out all the cooking ingredients that they would need for the pancakes. “Don’ forget chocolate chips, daddy.” 

“Oh don’t worry. We can’t forget those now can we.” Tony placed the giant bag of chocolate chips in front of Peter who was squatting down on the counter top and practically drooling onto the bag. “Can you take a handful out and drop it in the bowl for me, please?” 

Peter did as he was told and helped his daddy with the rest of the ingredients but Tony did the actual cooking part while Peter got out the butter and syrup. 

Soon enough, the chocolate chip pancakes were ready so the two of them sat down at the kitchen table and began eating. 

Once they were done eating and Tony washed Peter’s face, hands and chest, they moved to the living room and were playing with Peter’s trains when the doorbell went off. 

“Who’s there Jar?” Tony asked. He knew no one that he didn’t know wasn’t allowed on the property without him knowing so it had to be someone that he did know. 

“It is Obadiah Stane, Sir.” Jarvis answered and Tony rolled his eyes. He kept putting the man off and then the guy came to his house. Unbelievable. 

“Let him in.” Tony said then looked at Peter who was crawling closer to him. “It’s okay, baby. Stay here.” 

“No! I come with you.” Peter demanded and stood up with Tony, immediately reaching for his hand. 

Tony held Peter’s hand in his and walked to the front entrance where Obadiah had walked in. Peter was hiding behind his legs as he spoke to the man. Tony always kept Peter out of his business so Obadiah had only met Peter a handful of times. 

“What brings you to my lovely home, Obi?” Tony asked, keeping a distance away from Obadiah because he could tell Peter was scared of the unfamiliar man. 

“Tony, I’ve been calling you. Is your phone broken?” Obadiah asked but Tony knew he already knew the answer to that question so he didn’t speak. Instead, Obadiah started walking closer to Tony and Peter started whining and lifting his arms up for his dad so Tony leaned down and placed Peter on his hip. “I see your little one is here. I didn’t expect him to be.” 

Obadiah looked at Peter in Tony’s arms and waved at him but Peter stuck his tongue out at the man. “You suck! Go ‘way!” 

Tony placed his hand over Peter’s head. “Peter. That’s not nice.” 

“Listen to your dad, little one. How about you go play with your toys while I have a chat with your daddy? Okay?” Obadiah tried to offer but Peter shook his head and started screaming when the man reached out to touch Tony’s arm. “Okay. Relax.” 

“Don’ touch my daddy! Go ‘way!” Peter yelled at the man again and wrapped his arms around Tony’s neck. 

“Pretty brave for someone who's wearing a diaper.” Obadiah said and Tony was about to speak up but Peter beat him to it. 

“It’s pull-up and not diaper!” Peter yelled at him and Tony decided to put an end to this. Peter had become very aggressive since he’s been gone. 

“Enough. Obi, get out. I don’t know if you’ve heard but I’ve just spent the last three months away from my son so you need to leave.” Tony was walking towards Obadiah to push him out but the man held his hands up. 

“Wait, Tony. I came here to talk to you about that. Can we talk without your bodyguard?” Obadiah asked with some desperation to his voice that Tony would have pointed out if it was any other situation. 

“Fine. Give me five minutes.” Tony said then walked over to Peter’s playroom and shut the door. 

“What you doin’, Daddy?” Peter asked as Tony set him down on the mini couch in the playroom. 

The playroom had rainbow walls that Peter helped paint when he was three. The floor was all play mats so Peter could play comfortably on them. The whole ground was covered in toys; cars, teddy bears, bouncy balls, giant LEGO pieces and a bunch of other things. 

It was still pretty tidy and Tony knew that he cleaned it up before he left three months ago and barely nothing moved so he knew that Peter didn’t come in there at all while he was gone. 

“I’m going to go talk to Obadiah for a few minutes but I don’t want you there because it’s big people talk so you’re gonna stay here and play with yours toys until I come and get you, okay?” Tony really hoped Peter wouldn’t put up much of a fight. 

“No daddy! I stay with you!” Peter bounced up and down on the couch. 

“Yes Peter. Daddy will be back. Stay here.” Tony stood you and went to walk out of the playroom after Peter threw himself onto the floor and let out a loud scream. Tony had never seen that behaviour from Peter before. 

He walked back out into the hallway where Obadiah was still waiting for him. Tony wanted to get this conversation over with quickly. 

“Tony Tony Tony.” Obadiah started and Tony wanted to slap him already. “What were you thinking? We’re a weapon manufacturer. We make weapons, what do you think is going to happen now?” 

“Look, it’s my name on the side of the building so it’s my say in this and my say only.” Tony just wanted to get back to his kid, he didn’t want to be having this conversation with Obadiah because he knew Obadiah wouldn’t agree with his decision. 

“What we do keeps the wound from falling into chaos, Tony.” Obadiah tries to explain but Tony knew otherwise. 

“Not based on what I saw.” Obadiah didn’t say anything and continued to stare at him as he stepped closer. “We’re not doing a good enough job. We can do better, we’re gonna do something else.” 

“Oh, like what?” Obadiah asked and put his hands on his hip. “You want us to make baby bottles? How about some pull-ups for your kid?” 

Tony ignored that last comment. “I think we should take another look into arc reactor technology.” 

Obadiah laughed and shook his head. “Oh come on. The arc reactor? That’s a publicity stunt.” 

“It works.” 

Obadiah shook his head. “Yeah, as a science protect. Maybe you can save the idea for when your kids in high school. Get him an A plus. We knew it was a dead end from the start, right?” 

Tony felt the pain in his chest. “Hm, maybe.” 

“We haven’t had a breakthrough with that in what, thirty years.” Obadiah asked but Tony knew Obadiah already knew and that he was waiting for him to bring it up. 

“That’s what they say.” Tony eyed him. “Could you have a lousier poker face. Come on, just tell me, who told you?” 

“never mind who told me. Just show me.” Obadiah asked impatiently. 

“Rhodey? Rhodey or Pepper?” Tony asked, he assumed it was Rhodey. 

“Show me.” Obadiah gestured towards his chest. 

“Okay. Rhodey then.” Tony guessed then started undoing his shirt buttons. He opened his top and showed his arc reactor to Obadiah whose eyes lit up as soon as they landed on it. 

He moved closer to Tony and grabbed his shirt while he laughed as if all he saw was how he could use the arc reactor for his own selfishness. 

“It works.” Tony told him. 

“Listen to me. Tony.” Obadiah put his arm around him and brought Tony closer to him making Tony feel incredibly uncomfortable. “We’re a team. There’s nothing we can’t do if we stick together. Like your father and I.” 

Tony pulled away from him and resisted the urge to sigh. “I’m sorry I didn’t give you a heads up.” 

“Tony-” 

“I gotta get back to my kid and you gotta go.” Tony began walking back to the playroom. 

“Tony, just lay low for a bit.” Obadiah tried and when he saw that Tony wasn’t going to budge, he started walking towards the exit. 

“Drive safe.” Tony watched Obadiah leave before he opened the door to Peter’s playroom. 

Peter was sitting on the tiny couch that was in the playroom and stood up to run into Tony’s arms once he saw his dad. “Daddy! Is Obi gone?” 

Tony lifted his kid into his arms once Peter was in reach and he set him on his hip. “Yeah, baby. He’s gone.” 

Peter crossed his arms over his chest and stuck his bottom lip out as Tony turned to leave the playroom with Peter. “Good. I no like him. Daddy, where we goin’?” 

Tony walked up the stairs in the mansion and held Peter with his other arm. “We’re gonna get you dressed and then you’re gonna come with daddy on a little road trip.” 

Peter excitedly clapped his hands together. He loved going on road trips with his daddy. It was always so much fun and then he would fall asleep in his car seat and his daddy would carry him to bed. 

Tony placed Peter on the floor and sat on his knees so he could get Peter dressed into some track pants and a sweater. Tony helped Peter put his shirt on but he paused before putting his pants on. “Do you need to go pee first?” 

Peter nodded. “I go in my pull-up.” 

“No, you don’t need to wear your pull-up if you’re gonna go pee in it on purpose. It’s just for accidents.” Tony told Peter and felt the front to see if it was full. He knew Peter started to need pull-ups after he went missing and it was just a matter of time before he was comfortable enough to start wearing underwear again but now Peter was using his pull-up out of laziness rather than for accidents.” 

Tony stood up and gently guided Peter into the bathroom. He pulled down his pull-up and lifted Peter onto the toilet. “No! Don’ need to pee! I tell you that, daddy!” 

Tony kneeled down in front of him. “I don’t like that tone of voice, Peter. It’s not very nice and it’s not how you talk to your daddy.” 

Peter stuck out his bottom lip. “I don’ need to pee, daddy.” 

Tony stared at him for a few seconds and then started taking the dry pull-up off of Peter’s ankles. “Okay so you don’t need this for our car ride then-” 

Peter kicked his legs. “No! Nooo! Mine!” 

“Okay. There’s no need to scream, just go pee in the toilet and we can go.” Tony told him again and then heard the sound of Peter peeing so he sighed with relief, he didn’t understand how Peter could be so difficult at times. 

After Peter was done, Tony lifted him off the toilet and pulled his pull-up back up. “Go put your pants on and then we can go.” 

Peter ran into his bedroom and sat on the floor so he could put his pants on while Tony grabbed one of Peter’s backpacks and tossed in a bunch of pull-ups and wipes. 

Once Peter got his pants on, he tugged on Tony’s jeans. “Where we goin’, daddy?” 

“It’s a surprise. You ready?” Tony asked, swinging the bag onto his shoulder. 

“Wait! I wan’ to grab my toys.” Peter rushed to the corner of his bedroom and grabbed two teddy bears and a fire truck then walked back over to Tony. 

“Okay. Let’s go.” Tony said and then the two of them walked downstairs. Tony put Peter’s shoes on his feet and had to convince him to let go of his toys so he could put his jacket on. 

Tony did the same and then they were going outside. “I wan’ climb into my car seat myself, daddy.” 

Tony opened Peter’s car door and waited for him to climb in. He tossed the diaper bag in the backseat and buckled Peter up then they were on their way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made Peter hate Obadiah because young children can sense when someone is evil or have really bad intentions for example old Obi!! 
> 
> Anyways, I took so long to update this fic because I’ve been waiting for Iron Man 1 to come in the mail since I ordered it like a month ago but it’s still not here!! I know the nail is slow with everything going on and I just wanted to re watch the movie since the next few chapters are gonna be based on iron man 1 but it didn’t come yet


	17. Loneliness unfolds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry it’s been so long since I updated:( I feel so bad but I’ve had really bad writers block for this fic and I’m really focusing on my other fics right now

Peter was starting to get bored, Tony could tell. 

They had been in the car for over an hour nonstop since they didn’t have to stop for a potty break or anything. Peter always loved car rides and was content to play with his toys and look out of the window to watch all the cars pass by but even a car ride lover eventually gets bored of sitting in the car for so long. 

Especially if that person is a five year old child. 

“Daddy, when are we gonna stop? I’m bored.” Peter whined, kicking the back of Tony’s seat in the process. 

Ever since he came back from Afghanistan, Tony felt like he didn’t truly come back. 

Everything just felt so different like he was living a life that wasn’t his anymore. He felt like he needed to do something different with his life, shutting down his weapons manufacturing was the first thing on his list which he did. Even if Obadiah was angry at him for that. 

He didn’t care, it was his company after all. 

“Ten more minutes, Pete. We’re almost there.” Tony answered Peter. 

He knew he was a horrible father for bringing Peter to the store to buy a bunch of materials to build his own suit but he didn’t want to let Peter out of his sight and he knew Peter felt the same way about him so it was a win-win situation. Kind of. Pepper obviously wouldn’t approve and would bite his head off if she found out what he was doing with Peter but she wasn’t there and he was. 

Tony glanced back at his five year old son in the back seat and smiled. He told himself he was doing all of this for Peter. So his son didn’t grow up with a father as a murderer but deep down he knew he was doing this for himself. 

So he could do right within himself. 

Once they got to the store, Tony parked the car and got out, opening up Peter’s back door so he could unbuckle Peter from his car seat and lift him into his arms. 

“Daddy, where are we?” Peter asked, wrapping his arm around Tony’s back as he sat on his father's hip. 

Tony knew a lot of attention would be on them. He hasn’t been in the public since he got back from that cave but he didn’t feel like hiding away for the rest of his life. 

Plus it wasn’t fair to Peter. Tony was already keeping him home from school and had no intention of bringing him back any time soon. He was keeping his kid by his side. 

“We’re going to go shopping for a few things.” Tony answered him. 

“Can I get a new toy?” Peter asked excitedly but Tony shook his head as he placed Peter into the shopping cart seat, grateful that his kid still fits in there. 

“No, Pete. It’s not that kind of store.” There were already a bunch of people staring at them and taking pictures and videos but both Starks ignored it. 

Sadly, Peter was used to it and so was Tony. So after Tony bought him a doughnut, bagel and a chocolate milk from the mini cafe in the store, they were on their way. 

Tony bought it for him so Peter would stay calm and have something to do while he shops around. It was keeping him occupied which Tony was happy about. 

“Do you want a bite, daddy?” Peter asked, holding out his doughnut for Tony. 

“Sure, Pete.” Tony bit into it and hummed. It was really good. 

Tony continued to get everything that he needed, ignoring everyone who tried to come up to him to ask for a picture or an autograph. 

They were in and out of the store in only an hour which was good because the faster they could get home, the faster Tony could go to work. 

Peter ended up falling asleep halfway on the drive home which Tony was grateful for because he didn’t want to have to worry about having to entertain Peter when they got home since his mind was focused somewhere else. 

Tony knew he was a horrible father. He knew he was because Peter spent three months without his father, he celebrated his fifth birthday without him and now Tony was throwing him into his room to sleep while he went and did what he wanted to do. 

It was unfair to Peter and Tony knew that but he couldn’t help it. 

He carried Peter up to his room right after they got home and pressed a kiss to his son's face. “Sleep good, baby. JARVIS, let me know if he wakes up and needs me.” 

“Yes, sir.” JARVIS responded and then Tony got to work. 

He didn’t know how long he was in his lab for. He was trying to build his own design his way based off of mark one. He had a lot more to work with now and he didn’t have a gun pointed at his head to work. 

He did have the guilt weighing on his shoulders for not being there for his kid which was much worse in some ways. 

Tony continued to work through the guilt because he was doing this for his son. He was going to make the world a better place that didn’t have weapons in his name killing innocent people. 

He had been working on his new Arc Reactor so it wasn’t the old one he had in the cave and all he had to do was switch the old one out for the new but he needed help for that. He didn’t want Peter coming down into the lab especially since it was so messy because he couldn’t have his kid getting hurt. 

After many hours, Tony heard JARVIS speaking up, putting his music on pause. Tony was going to tell him that he was working and not to turn down his music but then he remembered his kid and wanted to punch himself for losing track of time. 

“Fuck. Time JAR?” Tony asked as he put away what he was working on and went to wipe his hands and an old rag that was a T-shirt at some point. 

“It is currently six in the evening. Young Peter has been awake since 3:45pm but has been playing in his bedroom.” JARVIS informed him as he left his lab and made his way upstairs to Peter’s bedroom. 

Peter was walking down the stairs and met Tony halfway. “Daddy. I missed you but JARBIS say you were workin’.” 

Tony felt horrible. He lifted his kid up into his arms and immediately felt that his pull-up was full and then realized that he hadn’t changed him in over six hours. He was a horrible father. 

“I’m sorry, baby. Daddy was so busy. How about we get you into a clean pull-up and then we’ll cook some dinner together?” Tony asked his kid and Peter nodded excitedly. 

Tony placed Peter on his feet in his bedroom and sat down on the ground. He grabbed a clean pull-up and wipes and patted the ground for Peter to lay down. 

“I was playin’ with my teddy bears, daddy. We had a tea party.” Peter explained as he laid down on the ground. Tony tugged his pants off and tossed them into the corner. 

He saw how full Peter’s pull-up was and felt horrible. “Oh yeah. That sounds like a lot of fun. Next time daddy will join you guys.” Tony undid the straps on the sides and dropped the pull-up to the side. “When are we gonna get rid of these, Petey. I know you don’t need them anymore.” 

Peter shook his head. “I do. I need them.” 

Tony shook his head as he grabbed a wipe and pushed Peter’s knees to his stomach. “No, how about we don’t put another one on until you go to sleep? Does that sound fun? You can eat your dinner with underwear on.” 

Peter shook his head. “No. Wan’ pull-up.” 

Tony grabbed a new wipe to clean Peter’s front part and sighed. “Nope. No pull-up until bedtime.” 

Peter let out a loud scream and went to kick Tony but Tony grabbed his ankle. “You do not kick daddy. Are you gonna stay in your room all night then?” 

Peter shook his head with a pout. “No!” 

“Then no pull-up. You’re a big boy.” Tony leaned back and opened Peter’s dresser to grab out a pair of underwear even as Peter started crying. He held them up for Peter to see but Peter’s face was scrunched up as he cried loudly. 

Tony grabbed Peter’s feet and put them through one hole at a time then pulled the underwear up on his hips and stood up. He grabbed the dirty pull-up to throw it into the garbage and wash his hands. 

Peter was pulling down the front of his underwear when he walked back into the room so Tony leaned down and pulled them back up then lifted his crying kid into his arms to go downstairs to get dinner started. 

“Are you gonna stop crying and help me cook dinner or continue to cry and sit on the steps?” Tony asked him, giving him his only options. 

Peter tugged on his underwear. “Pull-up!” 

“No. No pull-ups until bedtime. Pick your option or I’m picking for you.” Tony told him again but Peter threw his head back and continued to cry louder so Tony walked over to the steps and put Peter on them. 

Peter screamed as Tony walked away but Tony ignored him. He felt horrible and he hated how he didn’t even know who his kid was anymore. Peter never cried so hard unless he had to leave to go somewhere and now Peter was crying for no reason. 

Tony didn’t feel like cooking anything so he boiled some water and threw some pasta in then got some fruit and copped it up. 

After a few minutes, Peter’s crying was coming to a stop so he raced over to Tony and lifted his arms up for the man. 

“Daddy. Daddy up.” Peter begged and Tony couldn’t resist his kid so he lifted Peter up and put him on his hip. 

“Are you happy now?” Tony asked him then kissed Peter’s chubby cheek. 

Peter wiped the stray tears off his cheeks and nodded his head silently. He placed his head on Tony’s shoulder and closed his eyes since all that crying made him exhausted. 

Tony could tell Peter was exhausted especially after the day he had with all the running around, being without his dad and a huge temper tantrum. He felt guilty for being happy that he got to put Peter to sleep early since all he wanted to do was go down to his lab to finish working. 

“Do you wanna stir the pot for me?” Tony asked and handed the spoon to Peter. 

“Yeah. I can do it.” Peter took the wooden spoon from Tony and started to stir the pasta in the water while Tony made sure to hold the handle just in case. 

“Good job, Pete. You’re doing so well.” Tony praised him and then took the spoon from him. “I’m gonna put you on the ground now so I can stir empty the pot so can you put the fruit on the table?” 

Tony placed Peter on the floor and handed him the plate of fruits. “Yeah! I do that.” 

Tony made quick work of putting the pasta into the strainer and then he served it on two plates with some butter and parmesan cheese. 

“Mmm I’m hungry, daddy.” Peter licked his lips at the sight of the food coming to the table and picked up his fork to eat it. 

Tony sat down next to his kid. “Is it yummy? You helped me cook it so it must be delicious.” 

Peter blew on it. “It’s hot so we gotta blow.” 

Tony smiled at his kid. He missed out on that for three whole months. 

After dinner Tony raced Peter upstairs and into the bathroom for bath time. “I’m going to your bathroom, daddy.” 

“I’ll race you there so you better run.” Tony said to him and took off down the hall but he of course let Peter run ahead of him. 

“I win! I’m so fast!” Peter cheered. 

“Let’s see how fast you are at taking off all your clothes.” Tony told him and then plugged the plug into the bath and set it to Peter’s bath temperature. 

“I’m stuck.” Peter was half caught in his shirt which made Tony laugh as he helped Peter get unstuck. “Boo!” Peter grinned once he was free. 

“Ah! You scared me you little monkey.” Tony playfully tickled Peter on his stomach which he received a bunch of giggles out of his kid that made him smile. “Alright, hop in.” 

Peter’s favourite time of the day used to be bath time but that isn’t the case anymore. He isn’t a huge fan of it now and Tony knows that’s because he was away for three months and wasn’t there to give Peter his baths and it’s just not the same anymore. 

It wasn’t hair washing night but Tony helped Peter clean his face and the rest of his body. 

“Daddy, look. I put the cloth on my chest and it sticks.” Peter placed the wet face cloth on his chest and then let go and looked up at Tony proudly. 

“That’s so cool. You’re magic.” Tony tapped Peter on the nose. “Alright, it’s time for bed now so let’s get you out and dried off.” 

Tony reached for the plug but instead of standing up for Tony to lift him out of the tub, Peter laid down on his stomach and pretended to swim. 

“Come, baby. It’s time.” Tony reached into the tub and lifted his kid up, careful not to drop him on his face. He stood Peter up on the bathroom mat and immediately wrapped him up in a towel then started drying him off. “Mmm look at you. So cute I could just eat you up.” 

Peter giggled at his dad and moved his head away from Tony’s mouth. “No! You can’t eat me because then there’s gonna be nothin left!” 

“Alright. Fine. Maybe later then.” Tony kissed Peter on the cheek instead and then Peter was giggling out of his towel and running out of the bathroom to go to his bedroom. 

Tony stood up to follow him into his bedroom and laughed at his naked butt running down the hall. Peter was already digging in his pull-up box by the time Tony rounded the corner and into the bedroom. 

“My pull-ups, Daddy.” Peter said and held out two pairs. 

Tony sat himself down on the floor and took one from Peter. “But you don’t need two. That’s too much.” 

Peter giggled at his dad like he always did whenever Tony said something. Tony helped Peter into his pull-up then waited for him to get his pyjamas on while he waited on Peter’s bed. 

“I put my pyjama shirt on all by myself, daddy. Look!” Peter exclaimed excitedly and walked closer to Tony to point to himself. 

“Woah. Good job.” Tony reached forward to grab Peter by the arm so he could pull him into bed. “I got you.” 

“Ah Daddy.” Peter started laughing uncontrollably but it was time to relax now so Tony quickly placed him in his bed and covered him with his blankets. 

“Shh, it’s time to sleep. Shut those beautiful eyes until tomorrow morning.” Tony whispered as he ran his hand over Peter’s face to get him to relax. 

Peter shifted his body so he was facing his dad. His breathing started to even out as he relaxed more and more. 

“I love you so much my baby.” Tony whispered and leaned down to press a kiss on Peter’s forehead. He didn’t expect Peter to respond so he was surprised when he did. 

“I love you too, daddy.” Peter said quietly before he drifted off into dreamland. 

Tony carefully stood as to not wake his kid up. He shut the lamp off but kept the nightlight on and made sure that the door was open a crack so he could hear if Peter needed him even though he knew JARVIS would let him know. 

Tony quietly walked downstairs but almost had a heart attack once he saw Pepper standing in the middle of the living room. “Oh fuck. You scared me. What are you doing here?” 

Pepper glared angrily at him. “I came to check on you and Peter. I called you ten times and you didn’t answer. Where’s Peter?” 

Tony walked into the kitchen to get himself a cup of coffee before heading downstairs. “I just put him to sleep.” 

Pepper checked her watch and looked back up at Tony. “It’s almost ten at night, Tony. And you’re just putting him to sleep?” 

“Yes. Keep your voice down or you’ll wake him up.” Tony turned around to watch her match towards him. “Woah. Are you gonna hit me or something?” 

“I want to.” Pepper said seriously. “It’s ten and he’s five years old. You need to be more responsible and put him to bed earlier.” 

Tony rolled his eyes. “He had a long nap today.” 

“How long?” Pepper asked, annoyed at him. 

Tony shrugged. “I can't remember. It’s not important-” 

“JARVIS, how long was Peter’s nap today?” Pepper asked with no patience in her voice. 

Tony was scared of the response. 

“Peter slept for three hours and twelve minutes today.” JARVIS informed Pepper then Tony muttered, ‘traitor’. Pepper smacked him on the arm and hard. 

“Ow. What was that for?” Tony grabbed his arm where it was stinging. He turned to glare at her. 

“Three hours? Are you crazy? Toddlers don’t even sleep that long.” Pepper slammed the stack of papers she had in her arm on the kitchen table and Tony really hoped he didn’t have to sign anything. 

“We had a long day.” Tony tried to make an excuse but he knew it was because he was a lazy father. 

“Oh please. That’s no excuse.” Pepper sighed and ran a hand down her face. “Peter has missed over a week of school so when do you plan on sending him back?” 

Tony didn’t think about that. Was never an option? He wanted to keep his kid with him all the time. “Uh… I don’t know. Next question.” 

“No. Not next question. Peter needs to go back to school and start a routine for the two of you so he can start to adjust and get better.” Pepper told him. Tony knew she was referring to the pull-ups and separation anxiety. 

“I don’t know, Pep. I really don’t know. I need some time to think about it.” It was Tony’s turn to run a hand down his face stressfully. 

“Okay. That’s okay but I need you to think about it and talk to him.” Pepper told him. “Is he still wearing pull-ups?” 

Tony sighed. “Yeah. I took them away from him today for like three hours and he didn’t have any accidents but he didn’t use the toilet either. He also threw a temper tantrum because he didn’t want to wear his underwear.” 

Pepper nodded in understanding. “It’s because he’s used to them now and it’s convenient for him because he doesn’t have to get up and go to the bathroom to go pee but you need to stop him from wearing them during the day now before it gets worse and he gets too dependent on them.” 

Tony sighed again. He didn’t even think about that. Peter was definitely showing signs of being dependent on the pull-ups today. He needed to stop that. 

Just not right now. 

“You’re right. I will put both those things at the top of my to-do list but I need to get to work now. I’m very busy.” Tony grabbed his coffee and went to talk away but Pepper grabbed his hand to stop him from going anywhere. 

“We’re not done yet-” 

Tony cut her off to look at her hand. “Hey. You have really tiny hands. Yes. It’s perfect. Just what I need. Come with me.” 

Tony took a sip of his coffee and pulled Pepper to follow him downstairs to his lab. 

“Tony. Tony, what are you doing? Where are we going?” Pepper asked annoyed but somewhat curious. 

“You’ll see.” Was all Tony said and then dragged Pepper down into his lab so she could help him change his Arc Reactor since he didn’t have anyone else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so we all know what happens at the end, Pepper goes down to Tony’s lab and helps him change the arc reactor like in iron man 1 
> 
> I put up to 21 chapters because so far that’s how many are gonna be left but give or take one or two chapters:)


	18. The last golden egg

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii guys:) this chapter isn’t edited so oops if you see any mistakes, hopefully there isn’t a lot

Tony was down in his lab once again. 

Pepper was currently furious at him since he was spending all his time in his lab and Peter was extremely fussy which meant that Pepper had to deal with it. 

Tony was only showing his face for the occasional dinner time and every bath and bedtime but Peter was extremely fussy at that point after being denied access to his dad all day for three days straight. 

Pepper was working on basically potty training Peter again by having hour long arguments with him and then wrestling him into underwear but he kept having accidents because he was too distraught that his daddy didn’t want to see him. 

Pepper carried Peter down one day on her hip to the lab to drag Tony upstairs. “We’re gonna go see daddy.” Peter said happily and carried down the box wrapped in brown paper. 

“Yeah, Petey. We’re gonna tell him to get his butt upstairs.” Pepper explained as she walked down the stairs to the lab. 

Peter held the wrapped box close to his chest, excited to give it to his dad but even more excited to see his dad. 

Pepper typed in the code and pushed the door open. She spotted Tony in the corner with a metal contraption wrapped around his arm. “What are you doing? I thought you were done with making weapons?” 

“I am. This is different. It’s a flight stabilizer.” Tony explained and did a double take when he saw that Pepper was holding his son in her arms. 

“Daddy! Me and Pepper brought you a present!” Peter held the wrapped box out with his arms to show his dad. “Look, daddy.” 

“I’ll see it later, baby. Daddy’s very busy so Pep can you bring my kid back upstairs?” Tony asked her and tried to concentrate again. 

Peter stuck out his bottom lip in a pout. Pepper looked at Tony angrily but he wasn’t even looking at them. She took the box from Peter and placed it on the desk on a pile of magazines. 

She looked back up at Tony and heard the thing in his arm start to buzz. “Are you sure that’s safe?” 

“Yeah. Totally safe.” Tony set his feet into a better stance to prepare. 

Pepper watched as the thing lit up and then it was blasting Tony back into the wall and blowing up the light. Her and Peter both screamed but she quickly turned around to shield Peter from anything that might hurt him. 

After the blast was done and the light fell, Pepper let Peter slide to the floor but she still held him close. Tony was groaning and standing up so once she saw that he was okay, she lost it on him. 

“Get upstairs right now! I don’t care what you’re doing but it is not safe! Get upstairs! Now!” Pepper yelled at him and then picked Peter up and rushed out of the lab. 

Tony watched Pepper storm off with his kid. He took the flight stabilizer off his arm and unattached from it then he stepped over the mess he made to make his way upstairs. 

He really screwed up. He could have hurt his kid and now Pepper was pissed at him but he knew it was built up anger from him staying down in his lab for the past few days. 

He did not want to deal with her and he especially didn’t want to deal with his son. 

Tony walked up the stairs slowly to try and delay what he was about to walk into. When he got to the top of the stairs, Peter was standing there with his arms crossed and his face scrunched up. 

Tony went to go pick him up but Peter pushed his hands away from him which hurt Tony. His own kid didn’t even want him. 

“No! You’re a bad daddy. You don’ love me no more.” Peter yelled at him and it hurt Tony more than anything has ever hurt him. The words stung deep because Tony knew it was true. He just didn’t think that Peter believed it to be true and now that he knew his kid knew it was true, he was broken. 

“Please, baby. I love you so much. Daddy loves you more than you think is possible.” Tony kneeled down to Peter’s level to say to him but Peter shook his head. 

“Not true. You don’ wan’ see me. Ever.” Peter crossed his arms over his chest again and stuck out his bottom lip. 

Tony tried to hug Peter again but Peter was pushing him away. He fought his kid until he got his hands under Peter’s armpits and then he lifted him up and set him on his hip. 

“Daddy loves you. I need you to know that and it’s okay if you don’t love me anymore.” Tony said to Peter but Peter was shaking his head aggressively. 

“No! No, daddy. I love you like the stars love the moon and-and that makes me sad now.” Peter rubbed his eyes as a few years slipped out so Tony used his hand to wipe the tears away. 

“Okay, baby. I’m glad you still love me. But I’ll always always love you more.” Tony kissed Peter’s temple and smiled when he saw his kids smile. “Hey, I can feel that you’re wearing your underwear. Good job, baby.” 

Peter smiled shyly and laid his head on Tony’s shoulder. 

Pepper cleared her throat. “Can I talk to you, Tony?” 

Tony was about to make up an excuse as to why he can’t talk to her but then Peter was lifting his head off his shoulder and speaking. “Daddy, I need to go poo poo now.” 

Saved by the bell. “Okay, Petey. Let’s go. Sorry, Pep. Another time.” 

Tony carried Peter to the bathroom down the hall and placed Peter on the ground so he could put the potty seat on the toilet. He lifted Peter up once he got his pants and underwear down and then sat down on the stool to wait for Peter to finish. 

“What you doin’ downstairs?” Peter asked him. Tony still didn’t understand how Peter could have a conversation with him while he was going poop but he was used to it. 

“Uh, I’m just building some stuff. Much too dangerous for you to see just yet. Maybe when you’re older.” Tony told him but then Peter was doing his business so he waited for him to finish to wipe. 

“All done.” Peter announced so Tony stood up and grabbed some toilet paper and wiped his kid’s backside. “I like it when you wipe my butt, daddy. Pepper’s too hard because she just doesn’t have a bum like me and you.” 

Tony busted out laughing at that. “What? Yes she does, Pete. Everyone has a bum.” 

Peter shook his head. “But Pepper’s a girl and she has different boy parts than me and you.” 

Tony couldn’t stop laughing. He lifted Peter up off the toilet and flushed it then moved to wash his hands as he spoke. “Pepper has girl parts, Petey. But she has a butt.” 

“But she doesn’t have a pee pee.” Peter explained and reached down to grab himself so Tony rolled his eyes at his kid. 

“She does have a pee pee but you have a penis.” Tony could not believe he was having this conversation with his five year old. “Pull up your pants and come wash your hands.” 

Peter did as he was told and then he was following his dad out of the bath chanting bum over and over again. Tony’s smile dropped when he saw Pepper. She was sitting on the kitchen chairs and waiting for Tony. 

Tony put his hand over Peter’s head. “Pete, can you go play in the playroom while I talk to Pepper?” 

Peter shook his head and lifted his arms up towards his dad. “No. I wanna stay with you, daddy. Lift me up.” 

“I know, baby, but daddy has to talk to Pepper.” Tony gently pushed Peter off towards the playroom so Peter reluctantly walked away. 

Tony turned to Pepper and went to go sit down. “Peter says you wipe his butt too hard.” 

Pepper smiled softly but then dropped her smile. “Maybe if you were here then I wouldn’t have to do that. Plus he’s old enough to wipe his own butt but ever since you… left, he doesn’t like to do things by himself anymore.” 

Tony noticed that. He stopped wiping Peter’s butt about a month after he turned four. Now things were different though. 

“Tony,” Pepper said sadly. “you need to stop hiding yourself away downstairs. You were gone for three months and it was… hard to say the least but I was here for Peter day after day, night after night and I feel like you’re back in that cave all over again.” 

Tony froze. No. He wasn’t in that cold cave. He was in his house in Malibu with his son and Pepper. 

Pepper continued, completely oblivious to Tony’s panic. “You hide yourself away in that lab doing god knows what when you should be with your son. Peter needs you.” 

Tony put his head in his hands. He knew that. He knew that but he couldn’t stop now. He just couldn’t. 

.  
.  
.

Tony was playing with Peter in his playroom while he sent Pepper down to his office to receive some shipment orders from his files. 

He had been in the playroom for the last thirty minutes so he was waiting for a call or text from Pepper to let him know that she got it and that she was on her way back so when he heard the phone ringing in the living room, he stood up to go answer it. 

“Stay here, Pete. I’ll be right back.” Tony told him and went to leave the room. He heard the phone ringing on the couch so he made his way over and picked it up, answering it and putting it to his ear. 

There was a loud ringing in his ears, almost deafening and then he felt absolutely nothing. His body went dead on the couch, his head falling to the side and his heart beating ten times faster in his chest. 

He felt someone catch his head before it hit the couch and then the phone was being taken out of his hands followed by a voice that he’s known almost his whole life. 

“Breathe.” Obadiah said as he gently laid Tony down. “Easy. Easy.” He held up a device in his hand and showed Tony before turning it off. “You remember this one, right?” 

“It’s a shame the government didn’t approve. There’s so many applications regarding short term paralysis.” Obadiah let go of Tony and walked around to the other side of the couch so he was standing in front of Tony. 

All Tony could think about was Peter and how he was defenceless to fight for his kid. 

Obadiah grabbed his face so he could turn his head, forcing Tony to look at him. He took out the ear plugs and spoke, “Ah, Tony.” 

“When I Uh, ordered the hit on you,” Obadiah spoke and Tony felt his heart beating even faster in his chest. This man was the reason that Peter had to suffer without his dad for three months. “I was worried that I was killing the golden goose.” 

Tony could see Obadiah grabbing something from a briefcase. 

“I Uh, I did take Peter into consideration just so you know.” Obadiah said. Tony wanted to punch him for saying his son's name. “How he would have to grow up in this crazy world without a father. But… he isn’t important now is he? He’s just some five year old who's gonna get in the way.” 

Tony tried to speak. He wanted to kill this man for saying that about his son. 

Obadiah smiled and held the contraption above his Arc Reactor but then Peter ran out. 

“Daddy? Where did you go?” Peter ran over to them on the couch and looked up at Obadiah. “Go ‘way. Me and my daddy plain’.” 

Tony wanted Peter to leave. No. Peter can’t be here right now. 

Obadiah looked down at Peter and grinned. “That’s not going to happen, little one.” 

Peter looked away from Obadiah and looked over at Tony then his face dropped along with Tony’s heart. He jumped onto Tony’s lap and grabbed his face. “Daddy? Daddy?! What’s wrong? What’s wrong, daddy?” 

Tony tried to reassure him that everything was going to be okay but he couldn’t. Peter. Run. 

“Say goodbye to your daddy, Peter.” Obadiah said and then grabbed Peter by the arm to lift him off of Tony’s lap. 

Peter let out a blood curdling scream and tried to get Obadiah to let go of him. “No! Daddy! Help me!” 

Obadiah dropped Peter onto the floor and made his way back over to Tony to finish what he came there to do but Peter had other plans. 

“Don’ touch my daddy! Go ‘way.” Peter jumped back onto Tony’s lap and tried to shake him. “Daddy. Daddy, why won’t you hold me? Daddy!” 

Obadiah grabbed Peter’s wrist but Peter moved his head forward to bite him. Hard. Tony knew how badly those little teeth could hurt and when Peter bites him he doesn’t try to hurt him. 

“Ah fuck! Get the hell out of here.” Obadiah grabbed Peter by the upper arm and ripped him off of Tony’s lap then started dragging the screaming five year old towards the playroom. 

Obadiah threw Peter into the room and slapped the door, locking it so Peter couldn’t get out. 

Tony could hear and see the whole thing and as much as it hurt him to see Peter get thrown into the playroom, he knew he was safe in there now. Unless Obadiah went after Peter after he’s done with him. 

Peter fell back onto his playmat and saw the door slam shut but he was standing up and yelling, “JARBIS! Open the door!” 

The door opened and Peter ran out and ran to hit Obadiah but his hits obviously didn’t hurt the older man. Obadiah looked down at him and went to go throw Peter into the room again. 

“JARVIS, keep the door shut.” Obadiah yelled and threw Peter into the room one more time. 

“I do not take orders from you.” JARVIS responded. 

Obadiah clenched his jaw and marched into the playroom. Tony watched the whole thing and felt his heart drop. Nonononono. 

Peter screamed when he saw the big man try to grab him but he quickly moved out of the way and ran for the playroom door. “JARBIS, close the door!” Peter yelled once he was outside. 

The playroom door was closing and locking behind him, leaving Obadiah locked in there. 

Tony could not believe what he was seeing. His five year old outsmarted an old man. He could have cheered in joy if he wasn’t still paralyzed. 

Peter ran over to Tony and crawled back onto his lap. “Daddy. I’m scared. Why won’t you move? Daddy, please!” 

Obadiah started to kick the door down and Tony could see that in a few minutes he would get out. He tried to tell Peter to run but he still couldn’t talk. 

Peter was shaking and crying on his lap and desperately trying to get Tony to move. “Daddy. He’s gonna come. I’m scared. Please, daddy. Daddy.” 

Peter shoved his face into Tony’s chest and cried while Obadiah finished kicking down the door. Peter flinched violently against him but Tony couldn’t do anything but watch as the man pulled his son from him and held him down with one hand as he grabbed the contraption and held it above Tony’s Arc Reactor. 

Tony wasn’t going to survive that but he needed to because he needed Peter to be okay. 

“There it is, the last golden egg.” Obadiah took out his Arc Reactor and ripped it from his chest while Peter screamed and cried under his heavy hand. 

Tony watched as Obadiah let go of Peter to put his Arc Reactor in the briefcase and then he was standing up and straightening himself up. “I hate to involve Pepper in this. I would have preferred if she lived.” 

Tony wanted to scream. Not Pepper. He just needed Obadiah to leave without touching his kid so when he heard Obadiah walk out of the back door where he came from, he could have sighed in relief but instead he couldn’t breathe. 

Peter sat up after a few seconds and climbed back onto Tony’s lap. Tony could start to feel his hands and feet a bit but he still couldn’t talk or move all that much. 

He needed to get to the Arc Reactor in his lab. 

“Daddy.” Peter whispered, tears pouring down his face. “Why won’t you move?” 

Tony struggled to sit up and then he fell onto the floor while Peter let out a scream and climbed off the couch to try and help his dad. 

“Stop! You’re scaring me, daddy. Stop it!” Peter cried while Tony struggled to crawl across the floor towards the elevator that led into the lab. 

Tony hated hearing Peter scream and cry especially since it was because of him. 

He managed to get into the elevator and Peter must have known where he was trying to go so he pressed the button for the lab and bent down to touch Tony’s head. 

“Daddy. I’m scared. Why you crawling?” Peter cried out, begging for his dad to stand up and stop scaring him like he was. 

Tony wanted some badly to talk and comfort Peter but he couldn’t do anything but struggle to pull himself across the ground since more than half of his body was numb and he couldn’t do much of anything but focus on staying alive for his kid. 

The elevator doors opened so Tony started to half drag himself across the floor to get to his Arc Reactor. Peter was following him the whole time and crying next to him, scared out of his mind as he watched Tony crawl across the lab floor. 

“Daddy. Please. Stop.” Peter cried out. Sitting himself down on the floor and crying into his legs that he pulled to his chest. 

Tony had to ignore him. As much as it hurt him to do so. He pulled himself up on a bin of tools to try and reach for the case but that took up all of his energy so he collapsed onto the floor. 

Peter screamed and immediately stood up to get to Tony.

“Peter.” Tony barely managed to get out. 

Tears were streaming down Peter’s face as he looked at Tony and then looked up at the case where the Arc Reactor was. He stood up to grab it off the table and handed it to Tony. “Is this what you want, daddy? I get it for you.” 

Tony felt relief wash over him. Thank you. He took it from Peter’s hand and smashed it on the ground, shattering the glass. Peter screamed at the sudden action but that was okay since Tony would be able to hold his son soon. 

He lifted up his shirt and put the new Arc Reactor in and felt himself start to breathe properly. His heart was beating in rhythm now and soon he’d be able to comfort his kid. 

“Daddy. Daddy, are you okay now? Please, daddy. Peter sat himself down on Tony’s lap and grabbed onto the front of his shirt, begging his dad to give him some kind of much needed comfort. 

After a few minutes, Tony could feel himself start to come to life again. He felt his arms and legs and his heart was pumping blood throughout his body again. He managed to lift his arms up and wrap them around Peter’s small, shaking frame. 

“Peter. It’s okay. I’m okay now.” Tony whispered to his son who lifted his head up and looked at Tony with sad, terrified eyes. 

“Daddy. I’m so scared. You not movin’. I don’ like that.” Peter lifted his hand up to wipe the tears off his face but Tony stopped him and did it for him. 

Suddenly, there was a loud bang and then someone was running down the stairs to the lab. Tony felt his heart speed up. He hugged Peter closer to himself. 

“Daddy.” Peter said in fear. 

“It’s okay, baby. Daddy will keep you safe.” Tony would take that promise to the grave with him. 

“Tony? Tony?” It was Rhodey. Tony relaxed. His best friend stepped over the glass and found him leaning against the work table with Peter on top of him. “Oh god, Tony?” 

“It’s Obadiah. Where’s Pepper?” Tony grabbed onto Peter with one hand and used his other hand for Rhodey to help him stand up. 

“We know. Pepper’s about to arrest him with five agents.” Rhodey checked Tony and Peter over to make sure that they were okay but Tony was grabbing him. 

“No. No, that’s not gonna be enough.” Tony knew what he had to do but he couldn’t take Peter with him. “I need you to watch Peter. I have to go get Pepper.” 

“Daddy, no. Don’ leave me. No daddy!” Peter begged. Tony kneeled down to cup his son’s wet cheek. “Please no.” 

“Daddy loves you so much. Always remember that.” Tony pressed a kiss to Peter’s forehead and stood up, hating hearing his kid’s cries as he walked away from him. 

“No! Daddy please don’ leave me!” Peter cried and tried to run to his dad but Rhodey stopped him and picked him up. “Daddy!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys liked that chapter. I’ve added more chapters to this fic just because i ended up writing more than I expected for one part so yea


	19. I will love you with every single thing I have

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hii guys!! I didn’t edit this chapter because I was just too lazy to do I hope there isn’t many mistakes

If Peter was clingy before, that was nothing compared to how clingy he was now. 

It had been a few days since Obadiah tried to kill Tony and kill Pepper as well. Tony thought he was going to die and part of him was okay with that. He knew Rhodey had Peter and would keep him safe and he knew that Pepper would take care of his son for him. 

He would miss out on Peter’s entire life and never get to see him accomplish any more of his accomplishments or teach him how to ride a bike or drive a car, all things that a parent should do, he wasn’t going to be able to do and as hard as it was for him, he was at peace because he knew Peter would be okay. 

Now that he’s back and gets to hold his kid in his arms again, Tony doesn’t know how he was ever at peace with dying when he has a beautiful boy at home that he gets to take care of and love him with every single thing he has. 

It had been over two weeks since Peter had gone to school so that was something that Tony was going to work on with Peter. 

To say Tony was scared to send his kid to school was an understatement. He was terrified of not having his kid under the same roof as him and having him just a few steps away. 

He also knew that that was a huge reason why Peter was scared to go back to school. It was because Peter was sensing Tony’s fear and he saw that as if he should be scared too. 

Tony felt horrible but he knew Peter had to go back and that is why Tony is staring at his son sleeping in his bed next to him and mentally preparing himself to get Peter ready for school. 

Pepper was downstairs for emotional support but she said that she wanted Tony to do it all on his own and that it was important that he did it by himself. 

He decided to just go for it. “Pete, it’s time to wake up, buddy. It’s time for school.” 

Peter groaned and rolled onto his stomach. 

One step at a time, Tony thought. Wake Peter up. Get him dressed and fed. Get him in the car and then to school. 

Then repeat those steps every day for the next thirteen years. 

“Wake up, Pete. Pepper’s making pancakes for breakfast and we have to get down before she eats them all.” Tony said in a sing-song voice. 

Peter rolled back onto his back and opened his eyes so he could look at Tony. “I still tired. No school.” 

“You can sleep during nap time today at school. Get your butt up.” Tony pulled the blankets from off of Peter and got off the bed so he could go to the bottom of the bed and pull Peter by his feet. “Ready?” 

Peter nodded his head so Tony pulled him down the bed and then scooped him into his arms. It was an old school morning ritual that they used to do to wake Peter up a bit so he isn’t so cranky but it didn’t seem to be working now. 

Tony lifted Peter into his arms and carried him into Peter’s bedroom. Peter laid his head on Tony’s shoulder and wrapped his arms around him. “Don’ Wanna go to school, daddy.” 

Tony sighed. He didn’t want Peter to leave either. “It’ll be so much fun. You get to see all of your friends and colour me some pictures.” Tony tried to make himself sound enthusiastic but he knew he just sounded tired and stressed. 

Peter shook his head into Tony’s shoulder but didn’t say anything which Tony knew was because Peter was still really tired. Tony sat down on the floor and laid Peter down in front of him. 

He saw Peter rubbing his eyes with his face screwed up so he knew that it was only a matter of time before the waterworks started. 

Tony pulled Peter’s pyjama pants off of him and undid the wet pull-up, tossing it to the side for now. 

When Tony went to wipe Peter clean, Peter pushed his hands away. “No. Cold. Don’ like it.” 

“I’m almost done, Pete. Almost.” Tony made quick work of wiping Peter clean and then moved to the side to allow Peter access to his dresser so he could pick out his own clothes. 

The pull-up box was hidden so Peter didn’t see it and demanded that he wear one during the day which seemed to be working well so far. 

At night time, after a bath, Tony will let Peter grab his nighttime pull-up but then the box was taken away from him so the next morning Peter doesn’t see it and ask for one which has worked really well so far. 

Tony hoped that it worked that morning as well. 

“What do you want to wear today, Pete. It’s kinda cold out so I think some nice comfy track pants with a thick sweater.” Tony suggested to Peter who was still laying on the ground. “Come, Pete. You get to pick your outfit.” 

Peter shook his leg and grabbed onto his foot. Tony sighed. “Okay. So do you want me to pick your outfit for you?” 

Peter nodded his head so Tony quickly grabbed underwear, socks, grey track pants, a blue short sleeve top and a zip up red sweater. He went to go out the underwear on Peter but that’s when the tears started. 

“No! No, wan’ pull-up. My pull-up.” Peter cried and looked around the room for it but he didn’t see it so he sat up and tried to crawl over to his bathroom but Tony grabbed his ankle and pulled him back. “Nooo!” 

“Yes, Peter. You need to get dressed for school.” Tony pulled Peter onto his lap and struggled to get Peter’s underwear on since he was kicking and screaming and squirming in his lap. 

Tony managed to get it on and then he got Peter’s pants and shirt on. Socks and sweater would be after breakfast. 

Tony lifted Peter up in one arm and carried the rest of his clothes in his other hand while he went downstairs where Pepper was sitting on the kitchen stool. 

Tony put the clothes onto the counter and sat down with Peter in his lap to get some food in him. “Peter, stop crying. You need to relax.” 

Peter continued to squirm and cry in his arms which was annoying for Tony and painful for his ears. “Peter. Stop it.” 

Tony turned Peter around on his lap and held him up so Peter could look at him face to face. Peter looked at Tony and tried to wipe the tears off his face while he tried to stop crying. 

“I-I sorry, daddy.” Peter reached for Tony so Tony let Peter hug him for a little bit. 

“It’s okay. You need to eat now, baby.” Tony told Peter and gently pried him off his chest so he could eat. “Pepper made it and you know how Pepper gets when you don’t eat her food.” 

Peter didn’t laugh or show Tony that he even heard at all so Tony handed Peter his fork and waited patiently until Peter was done. 

Tony knew that they were going to be at least an hour late for school at the rate they were going. He tried to wake up earlier to get Peter up earlier so they had more time for temper tantrums but they were still behind. 

“Daddy has to put your shoes on, Peter. Stop.” Tony attempted to put Peter’s shoes on but he wouldn’t stop squirming so Tony gave up. That would be his teacher’s problem. 

He lifted Peter up and grabbed his backpack from Pepper. “Are you not coming?” 

“I have a meeting to get to in thirty minutes, Tony. I told you this.” Pepper said, annoyed. 

Tony had no idea about that meeting. “Oh. Oh, yeah. Right. Okay. I’ll see you later then.” 

Tony said to Pepper and then he was putting Peter into the car, ignoring his crying and his screaming. Tony felt horrible. He wanted Peter to go back to being his happy self but now he was five and all he wanted was his pull-ups and for Tony to hold him. 

Peter had continued to whimper the whole drive to the school which broke Tony’s heart. He tried to say something to him and start a conversation but Peter refused to talk to him which was a surprise from the four year old Peter that Tony knew. 

By the time they got to school, they were just over an hour late which wasn’t that bad in Tony’s opinion after the morning they had. 

He was desperate to get back and to work in his lab until he had to go pick Peter up from school. 

Tony parked the car and opened up Peter’s back door. “Come, baby.” Tony said as he unbuckled the car seat straps and held his arms out for Peter but Peter crossed his arms and shook his head. 

Tony sighed. “You get to see all your cry and your teachers. They all miss you so much.” 

Peter shook his head again so Tony reached into the car and picked Peter up which immediately had Peter screaming bloody murder. “Please, Peter. Be good for daddy.” 

Peter didn’t listen or simply didn’t hear Tony because of how loud he was crying. “Don’ wan’ go! Nooo, daddy! No!” 

Tony carried Petet into the kindergarten entrance of the school with Peter in one hand and his shoes and backpack in the other hand. 

One of the teachers opened the door and smiled widely at Peter. “Good morning, Peter. We all missed you so much.” 

Peter tried to hit her. “No!” 

“Peter. That’s not nice.” Tony warned him and kneeled down to say goodbye to his son. This was hard for him too much he knew it had to be done. “Daddy’s gonna go now but I’ll pick you up after school.” 

Peter shook his head and tried to climb into Tony’s arms. “No. No, don’ go. Don’ leave me! Please, daddy. Nooo!” 

Tony’s heart was breaking. He gave Peter a long hug and pulled away, cupping Peter’s face. “Daddy has to go back home now but I’ll see you soon and you can tell me about all the fun you had.” 

Peter was shaking his head. “No. Stay with me. Stay.” 

Tony pressed a long kiss to Peter’s head and then stood up to speak to Peter’s teacher. “Here’s his backpack. He refused to put his shoes on this morning so here are those. Uh, I packed extra underwear and pants just in case he has an accident but he should be fine.” 

Peter was desperately trying to grab onto his leg and pull himself up as Tony spoke to his teacher. He ran his hands through Peter’s hair to try and calm him but it wasn’t working. 

“Daddy. Up! I wan’ up. Don’ leave me! Daddy!” Peter cried out to him and that was it for Tony. 

He wanted to join Peter in crying right there. Was it too late to cancel the day and bring Peter home with him? He wanted to do that so badly but he knew he couldn’t. 

“Peter, I love you and I’ll see you soon. Be good, okay?” With that, Tony turned and left, leaving his kid while he was begging for him. 

Tony knew he was a horrible father and this just proves it. 

.  
.  
.

Tony had completely lost track of time and that is why he forgot to pick Peter up from school. 

After he dropped Peter off, he had a silent drive home, alone with his thoughts which was nice because it helped to clear his mind a bit. 

Then when he got home, he immediately ran down to his lab and started to work on his suit. He had a bunch of improvements to make that he learned when he was fighting Obadiah. 

He was already on Mark three when Pepper called him, furious. 

“To what do I owe the pleasure?” Tony said into the phone that he put on speaker so he could continue to tinker away with his armour. 

“Tony. Do you have any idea what time it is? I get a call from Peter’s school saying that no one was there to pick him up at three thirty! His school ends at three and where are you?!” Pepper yelled into the phone, burning with rage. 

Tony felt his heart drop. Fuck. He dropped his tool and picked up his phone to see that it was 3:43pm. Fuck fuck fuck. 

“Oh fuck. No. I’m coming. Are you there now?” Tony asked in a rush as he left his lab and ran up the stairs. 

“I’m here now, I stepped outside and I would have brought him home but he refuses to leave with anyone but you.” Pepper explained to him and Tony felt like complete and utter shit. 

“Okay. I’m coming. Tell him I’m coming.” Tony jumped into his car and floored it. “I lost track of time. I was in the lab.” 

Pepper laughed annoyed and then the phone hung up on the other end. Tony drove faster. 

.  
.  
.

“Where’s my Daddy?” Peter asked his teacher. All the other kids were leaving and the bell had rung a long time ago but he still wasn’t being picked up yet. 

His teacher patted his head. “He’s coming soon, Peter. Let’s go finish your drawing.” 

Peter shook his head. “He gonna come now?” 

His teacher sighed and shrugged. “I don’t know. Soon. Let’s go sit and wait for him.” 

Peter took his teachers hand and joined the other kids at the colouring table. He wanted his dad. All the other kids had already left but the left over kids that stayed extra late were the only ones there now. 

He kept glancing at the door to see if his dad was coming but it was never him. He watched his teacher step outside to make a call while she kept glancing over at him and then a few minutes later Pepper was showing up. 

Peter got up and ran over to her, lifting his arms up. “Pepper! Where’s daddy? He said he gon’ pick me up.” 

Pepper sighed. “I know but now I’m gonna take you home instead, okay?” 

Peter frowned and shook his head, kicking his legs to be put down which Pepper did. “No. I wan’ daddy to pick me up. Daddy only.” 

“I don’t know what your daddy is up to so how about we go home and yell at him?” Pepper suggested but Peter crossed his arms and shook his head. 

“No! Bring daddy here. I wan’ my daddy and only my daddy. Not you. I don’ leave with you.” Peter said and then ran off to go sit in the corner on the beanbag chair to wait stubbornly for his daddy. 

Pepper watched Peter run off. He knew Peter took after Tony’s stubbornness meaning that Peter will not leave unless Tony comes. She stepped outside to make a call. 

Less than fifteen minutes later, Tony was rushing into the kindergarten classroom, looking extremely stressed but Pepper didn’t care because she planned on giving him so much shit later. 

“Where is he?” Tony asked, looking around the room. 

Peter spotted him and his face broke out in a smile before he was making his way over to his dad and opening his arms up to be lifted up. 

Tony picked Peter up as soon as Peter was in reach and he hugged his kid to his chest. “Hi baby. I’m so sorry I’m late.” 

“Daddy, you came. I missed you and-and I thought you weren’t gonna come, daddy.” Peter said as he hugged Tony tightly and laid his head on Tony’s shoulder. 

“I know, I’m so sorry. How about we go home and we can do whatever you want until dinner and bath time? Does that sound fun?” Tony suggested and Peter nodded excitedly then hugged Tony back tighter. 

He began walking out of the classroom with Pepper in tow carrying Peter’s backpack. She handed Tony his backpack and gave Tony a dirty look. 

He looked away. “Thanks for coming. I got him tonight so you don’t have to come by.” 

Pepper shook her head. “Oh I’m coming. After Peter goes to bed, me and you are gonna have a little talk.” 

Tony was not looking forward to that. 

He carried Peter to his car and buckled him into his car seat, feeling like the most shitest father in the world. 

Tony got into the driver's seat, started the car and pulled away. He looked back at Peter in his car seat who was looking out the window. His eyes were still red and puffy no doubt from all the crying that he had done before Tony got there. 

Tony hated himself but he needed to know if Peter hated him too. “Baby? Do you still love me after I forgot to pick you up?” 

Peter looked at his dad in the rearview mirror with a confused expression on his face. “You forgot to pick me up?”

Tony was silent for a few seconds. He assumed that Peter just thought that he had been stuck in traffic or he was late for other reasons. “Yeah. I’m so sorry but I was just working in my lab.” 

Peter didn’t show that he was sad or angry or anything. “Oh. Well, I don’ like it when you workin’ in the lab but I still love you, daddy. So much.” 

Despite the situation, Tony smiled a genuine smile. “I love you too, Peter.” 

Later that night, Tony had prolonged Peter’s bedtime just because he didn’t want to have that talk with Pepper since he knew that she was going to rip his head off. 

He was in the process of getting Peter dressed for bed after bath time when Pepper walked into the five year olds bedroom. “Hi Pepper. Daddy’s helpin’ me.” 

“I can see that, Peter.” Pepper smiled at the boy and Tony ignored her presence. 

“Step into it, Pete.” Tony held Peter’s beloved pull-up out for him and helped Peter get it on and then he let Peter put his pyjama shirt and pants on himself while he got Peter’s bed ready. 

Pepper left the room after that, leaving Tony to put Peter to sleep but Tony ignored her presence the whole time. 

“Daddy, can you do the spider thing on my belly?” Peter asked as he crawled into bed and let Tony tuck him in. He shifted so that he could face his dad. 

Tony brushed the curls out of Peter’s face. “Of course, Pete. Lift your shirt up and let me see that belly of yours.” 

Peter giggled and did as he was told so Tony started to make Spider actions gently over his son's belly. After a few minutes of doing that, Peter’s eyes started to close so Tony put his shirt down and covered him up with the blankets. He knew Peter was exhausted after today. 

“Goodnight, Pete. Have good dreams.” Tony whispered into Peter’s ear before pressing a kiss to his forehead and reluctantly leaving Peter’s bedroom. 

Tony did not want to have a talk with Pepper. He would never actually admit it but he was scared of her. She was a very powerful woman and he didn’t stand a chance against her. 

He walked down the stairs and saw her sitting on the couch in the living room. After making awkward eye contact with her, Tony looked away and went into the kitchen to make himself a coffee but Pepper was standing up and making her way towards him. 

“What are you doing?” She asked, annoyed and mad. 

“I’m making myself a coffee.” Tony simply said. 

“Stop. It’s nine at night. You’re gonna make yourself a coffee so you can go downstairs and work in the lab again and then forget to take Peter to school.” Pepper turned the coffee maker off and grabbed the cup out of Tony's hands. “After we talk, you are going up to bed to be refreshed for Peter tomorrow.” 

Tony didn’t say anything. He would love to do that but it wasn’t that simple. He needed to go down to his lab. 

“What is wrong with you, Tony? You are acting like you don’t have a kid. You’re working down in your lab 24/7 and Peter is suffering because of it.” Pepper yelled in a whispered tone. “You give more attention to your lab than you do to your own kid.” 

That hurt to hear but Tony knew it was the truth. “I can't exactly bring Peter down there with me. It’s dangerous.” 

Pepper eyed him. “Are you serious right now? Are you actually serious? I’m telling you to stop going down to that lab of yours and be a father to your son.” 

“I’m trying. It’s hard to raise a kid while trying to protect people that my weapons had put in danger. I’m trying… I’m trying to fix my mistakes.” Tony rubbed his eyes. He was so tired. 

“What’s done is done. Peter needs his dad right now. I was playing the part of daddy and Pepper while you were gone and I was prepared to spend the rest of my life doing that because I thought you were dead and now you’re back and I still feel like I’m playing daddy and Pepper.” Pepper was close to tears, Tony could see that but he didn’t say anything about it.

He sighed and looked away. “I know. And I’m trying but it’s hard.” 

“It’s not hard, Tony.” Pepper sounded desperate. “You just need to be there for your kid and stop going down to the lab all. The. Time.” 

Tony shook his heads. He couldn’t do that. “It’s not that easy.” 

“But it is. You’re making it harder.” Pepper said. No one said anything for a few long seconds but then Pepper spoke again. “Are you really choosing Iron Man over Peter?” 

Tony felt like he got slapped across the face. “No. Never. Peter comes first all the time but I can do both.” 

Pepper shook her head sadly. “Can you though, Tony? For how long until it starts to effect Peter?” 

Tony looked away. He had a coffee maker in his lab so he didn’t need to stay up there anymore. “I’m going down to my lab. Leave me alone.” 

Pepper watched Tony go back down to his lab. She didn’t know how much longer this could keep up before Peter starts to get affected but she didn’t want to find out. 

Tony went down to his lab but he didn’t do much. 

He was thinking about what Pepper had said to him. He didn’t put Peter second and he never would. Peter was his baby and he would do absolutely anything for him. 

He sighed because he was sitting in his lab and not with his son. 

.  
.  
.

Over the next week it was the same thing. Although Tony had remembered to pick Peter up every single day from school and put him to bed at a reasonable hour, he had been spending all the other time in the lab. 

Staying awake for over seventy hours at a time. He would turn the tv on and put out some food for Peter and then disappear into his lab for hours on end. 

He could see that Peter was not happy with him at all. The five year old was irritable and angry, throwing his sippy cups and toys and hitting Tony no matter what he did. The daytime wetting had started again so Tony had kept Peter home from school today so he could keep Peter in a pull-up. 

That didn’t mean that he was around Peter all the time either but Peter was used to it. The five year old would play by himself in his playroom and the only time Tony would go up was to change Peter or see if he needed more food or anything else. 

It had been almost five hours since Tony had last checked on Peter but that was okay since JARVIS was watching him and there’s no better babysitter for Peter than JARVIS. 

Pepper walked into the mansion expecting to find Tony getting ready to put Peter to bed since it was already eight at night but what she found made her blood boil. 

Peter was still wide awake and playing in his playroom while Tony was nowhere to be found. 

“Peter, where’s your daddy?” Pepper asked the five year old who was playing with his teddy bears and making them have a tea party with him. He looked over at Pepper and pointed. 

“He’s downstairs.” Peter answered then went back to his toys. 

Pepper sighed. She walked into the playroom and sat down next to Peter. “Has daddy been in his lab all day?” 

Peter nodded. “He’s down there all the time. All the hours.” 

“Do you want him to be playing with you instead?” Pepper asked, already knowing the answer. 

Peter nodded and rubbed at his eyes. “Uh huh. But he doesn’t like me no more. He likes Iron Man now.” 

Pepper knew that Tony loved Peter more than anything and it would kill him to hear what Peter just said but right now, Tony was in fact picking Iron Man over his son and Peter was starting to know that as well. 

Pepper cupped the child’s face. “How about we go pack an overnight bag and you come spend the night at my apartment with me?” 

Peter rubbed at his eyes again and nodded. “But is daddy gon’ stay here?” 

“Yeah. He’s not welcome. Just us two.” Pepper stood up and pulled Peter to his feet. 

“Yeah. Because daddy’s bad. He’s a bad boy.” Peter said and Pepper had to hold back from laughing too hard. 

The two of them went upstairs to go pack Peter an overnight bag, packing way more toys than actual clothing. Peter had only been to Pepper’s apartment once back before Tony had gotten kidnapped for three months. He only came to welcome her to the new house with homemade cookies that him and Tony made. 

Pepper then picked Peter up along with his bag and went downstairs so they could say goodbye to Tony. “Let’s go say bye bye to daddy. We’ll see him when he starts behaving, right?” 

Peter gave a sharp nod. “Right.” 

Pepper walked down the stairs leading to the lab and knocked on the glass door. Tony was working on something on his work desk but Pepper paid money attention to it. 

Tony was looking up a few seconds later and looking at them confused. He walked over to the door to unlock it even though Pepper already knew the code, she just didn’t plan on going inside the lab with Peter. 

“What are you doing here, Pep?” Tony asked, confused. He looked at Peter who had his arms wrapped around Pepper and his head on her shoulder. 

“We’re here to say goodbye. I’m taking Peter to my apartment until you learn how to be a father.” Pepper said bluntly. 

Tony felt like he got slapped across the face. “What? Taking him? You can’t just take my kid.” 

Pepper turned and started walking back up the stairs at that. “It’s what I’m doing, Tony. You’re down in that lab all day and all night, Peter’s back in pull-ups, urs last his bedtime, want me to keep going?” 

Pepper began walking towards the front door with Peter while Tony followed them. “Wait. Wait, stop. Stop.” 

Pepper stopped walking and turned around to glare at Tony. Tony looked like a mess but she didn’t expect any less from him at this point. “I’m trying, Pep. Please.” Tony held his arms out for Peter and Peter immediately reached out to be held by his dad but Pepper didn’t let him go. “Come here, Peter.” 

“Stop it, Tony. The thing is you’re not, you’re not trying at all and Peter can see that.” Pepper turned to leave again while Tony chased them outside. “So until you can learn to act like the dad you are, I will be taking Peter. We can set up a time for you to see him.” 

“No. Absolutely not. You’re not taking my son, Pepper. I’m not setting up a time to see my own kid, hand him to me.” Tony was not letting Pepper take his kid. He had just gotten his kid back and now Peter was being taken away from him again. 

Not a chance. Although he didn’t understand why he wasn’t fighting harder. 

Pepper buckled Peter up into his car seat in her car and then she tossed his bag into the other seat and shut the door. “Go back into that house, get some sleep and call me when you are ready to act like a father. Because right now Peter thinks that you don’t love him anymore because you love Iron Man now and to be pretty honest with you, Tony, I think that’s the truth.” 

Tony didn’t say anything. He watched as Pepper got into the car and started it. All he could do was stare at the back seat window that was tinted so all he could see was his reflection and he hated it so much. 

He didn’t do anything to stop Pepper from driving away with his son. Once they were out of sight, he went back into his house and down to his lab but he just sat there. 

He knew that he loved Peter more than anything and Iron Man was… it was definitely a distraction from what happened to him and trying to deal with the ptsd from it all. 

That didn’t necessarily mean he was a bad father, did it? He didn’t know. Over the past week he had been with Peter for a total of hours that he could probably count on both hands and that wasn’t good. He had been giving more attention to his freaking suits. 

He didn’t know if he wanted to stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys liked that. So I think there’s gonna be 4 more chapters left in this series


	20. I’ll love you forever and ever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is super short and I’m sorry for that but I just wanted to get to the point and move onto the next part so I hope you guys like this

It had been a full day since Tony had seen his kid. 

It had been hard but he knew it was necessary to be away from him so he could figure some things out. Even though he knew that one day wasn’t going to fix all of his problems or make him be a dad that was actually present in his kids life, that one day made him realize a lot. 

He missed his son and he needed to hold him in his arms and that was enough to want to stop being down in the lab so much. It wasn’t fair to Peter and it was definitely starting to take a toll on his body as well. 

So after sleeping for sixteen hours, having a long shower and eating a decent meal, Tony was feeling a lot better. 

He was making his way up to Pepper’s apartment floor, having no idea why he was feeling so nervous. Peter was his son so he didn’t know why he felt nervous to see him. 

He knocked on the door and waited awkwardly, holding the brand new stuffed bear that he bought for Peter on his way over. He waited a few seconds before the door was being opened by Pepper. 

“Uh hi, I’m just here to pick my kid up for the night.” Tony said with some heat behind the words. He had been allowed after practically begging Pepper on the phone to take his son back. She agreed but Peter was to spend one day with him and that’s all. From 20am one day to 10am the next day. 

She stepped aside to let him in and then Tony heard the sound of light footsteps charging at him. Peter rounded the corner and then screamed excitedly and charged at Tony. 

“Daddy! Daddy!” Peter yelled and ran into his daddy’s arms. Tony lifted him up in the air and hugged his baby to his chest. 

“I missed you so much, Petey.” Tony hugged Peter tightly, just enjoying that he had his baby in his arms and that Peter didn’t hate him. 

On the way over, he was so scared that Peter would refuse to hug him or want to come home with him but apparently that wasn’t the case and he was worried for nothing. 

“You ready to go home?” Tony asked Peter after Peter pulled away from him to look at his face. 

“Forever?” Peter asked. He placed both hands on Tony’s cheeks to gently cup his face. 

“Well, maybe just for one night right now. Let’s go.” Tony pressed a kiss to Peter’s cheek and then they were heading out. 

“Bye bye Pepper. I see you later.” Peter waved bye to Pepper but Tony ignored her. She took his kid away from him. 

“Bye Peter. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Pepper watched the two leave and then shut the door. 

Tony had his kid back and that’s all that mattered. It was a Saturday so he had all day to hang out with his kid. 

.  
.  
.

Today had been a fun day. Tony and Peter had played in the playroom basically the whole day. Peter had learned how to count up to one hundred which Tony wasn’t aware of. 

It made him really think about the important life milestones that he’s missing out on. Peter was an extremely smart kid, Tony knew that most five years olds weren’t counting to 100 but his kid was a genius. 

The only thing was that Tony missed out on that. Peter was growing up and he wasn’t there to watch it happen by choice. 

Tony was getting Peter ready for bed, feeling like it was a lifetime ago that he had done it even though it was just two nights ago. Peter was putting his pyjama pants on by himself when he paused and looked up at Tony. 

“Daddy?” 

“Yeah, baby?” 

“Um… do you still love me? Or-or just sometimes?” Peter asked in a quiet voice and it broke Tony’s heart. He made Peter think that he didn’t love him. What a father he was. 

“No, Peter. Don’t you ever think that. I still love you, baby. I always will love you. I love you so much that it hurts sometimes and I want to hold you in my arms forever but it’s just… it’s hard for daddy sometimes because I was away from you for so long and so much happened in those three months.” Tony tried to explain to Peter. He knew that Peter was trying to process everything so he waited while Peter thought about it. 

“Well, then why do you always play with Iron Man? I want to play with you too but you always down there.” Peter flopped just hand onto the floor to prove how annoyed he was. “I don’ like it.” 

“I know. I know you don’t like it and I’m trying to be better. For you. I want to be a better daddy for you, Peter. I know it’s hard but I am trying.” Tony said to Peter. He needed to be better for his kid. 

Peter sighed dramatically. “I know. I just miss you this much,” Peter spread his arms out to show Tony just how much he missed his dad. 

Tony spread his own arms out to beat Peter, “Well, this is how much I miss you.” 

Peter used that opportunity to go into his dad’s send and hug him. “I love you, daddy. So much.” 

“I love you too, baby. So so much.” Tony squeezed Peter back and then helped him finish getting dressed and then he carried him over to his bed and tucked him in. 

“Daddy, can you read me a bedtime story like before?” Peter asked Tony, rolling onto his side so he could fade his dad. 

“Sure, Pete. I’ll read whatever you want me too.” Tony pressed a kiss to Peter’s cheek. 

For the first time in a long time, Tony didn’t go down to his lab after Peter was asleep. 

.  
.  
.

The next morning was a weird morning. 

Tony didn’t want Peter to leave him again but after he put Peter to sleep the night before, Tony had laid awake in his bed and had really thought about it. 

As much as he hated not having his kid with him, he knew that it was necessary for Pepper to take Peter from him while he figures out his life. It was a temporary situation that Tony was trying to end because he wanted Peter to stay with him at all times. 

So Tony was trying to do better. Even though Peter wouldn’t be with him this week, he was going to limit his lab time so he could actually be a dad. 

Peter however didn’t understand why Tony was sending him back to Pepper’s. “But I want to stay with you, daddy. I like bath times with you better than with Pepper.” 

Tony sighed as he packed another overnight bag for Peter so he had more clothes at Pepper’s apartment. “I know you do, Pete. I like them too but remember I told you how I’m trying to be better?” Peter nodded his head so Tony continued. “Yeah well, as much as it sucks, this is part of it.” 

Peter stuck out his bottom lip in a pout. “This sucks. I’m gonna miss you so much again.” 

Tony cupped Peter’s cheeks. “I’m gonna miss you even more my baby boy. And remember that I love you so so much. More than anything in this whole entire world.” 

Peter’s eyes went wide. “Woah. That’s a lot.” 

Tony nodded. “Yep. It’s true. Now let’s go see Pepper again.” 

It continued the same way for the next week and the week after that. Tony saw Peter everyday for a few hours after school, sometimes he would surprise Peter and pick him up. He also would take Peter every Saturday night till Sunday but it was important for Tony to have some alone time to be alone with his thoughts and how to cope with his life now as Iron Man and a father. 

Tony was forever grateful for Pepper. He honestly had absolutely no idea where he would be without her. Pepper had realized before he even did that Peter was struggling and being affected by Tony’s old habits. 

That is over with now. 

Tony doesn’t want to go back to that. He knows he has a kid and that it’s his responsibility to be there for Peter and to raise him, no one else. Although a little help every once and while is nice too. 

Tony pulled his car up to the driveway and turned it off. Peter was practically vibrating with excitement at being back at home after having gone so long without going home. 

“Hurry up, daddy. I wan’ out.” Peter demanded as Tony got out of the car. 

“I’m coming. I’m coming.” Tony couldn’t keep the smile off his face as he unbuckled Peter from his car seat and lifted him out, pressing a bunch of kisses to his face. “Mm so cute. My baby.” 

Peter giggled and tried to move his face away. “Scratchy face. Scratchy face.” 

Tony laughed at his kid and put him on his feet to watch him run up to the front door. “What do you want to do first, Pete?” Tony asked as he opened the door. 

Peter ran inside as he excitedly yelled, “Go play in my playroom like you promised before!” 

Tony followed after his kid. “Okay. I’m coming.” 

The two of them made their way into Peter’s playroom. Peter sat himself down on the floor and started to get all his toys out that he missed so much. 

Tony couldn’t help himself because he just needed to hold Peter in his arms and never let him go. He grabbed Peter and sat down, pulling Peter close to his chest. “I love you so much, Peter. Do you know that?” 

Peter giggled at his dad. “Yeah. I know that. I love you too, daddy.” 

Tony kissed Peter on the temple and hugged him tighter because as long as Peter knew he loved him, he knew he was doing a great job at being Peter’s dad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony is a good father. He was just struggling a lot with PTSD and he needed Pepper to take peter away from him so he could make himself better!


	21. I need you to stay safe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii guys! I’m getting my kitten sooonnn!! I’m so excited!!

“Tony? Is somebody there?” Pepper asked after she threw their bags over the upstairs railing and walked down the stairs. 

“Yeah it’s an… old friend.” Tony stepped outside of his suit. “That I used to know… barely.” 

Maya pulled on Tony’s arm to get his attention. Look, I need your help.” 

“Wha-what for? Why now.” Tony asked, confused. He didn’t know why someone he met years ago was showing up at his house. 

Maya sighed. “Because I read the papers and frantically, I don’t think you’ll last the week-” 

“I’ll be fine.” Tony reassured her but he wasn’t so sure. There was only so much JARVIS could do to protect them after he gave his home address to the world. 

Pepper stepped out from behind the giant bear and walked towards them. “I’m sorry. With Happy in the hospital, I didn’t think we were expecting guests.” 

“We’re not… she came here, I don’t-” 

Pepper cut Tony off. “We’re going out of town. Get ready.” 

“Okay, no. We’ve been through this-” 

“Yep! Immediately and indefinitely.” Pepper said to him and Tony three his arms up with a sigh of annoyance. 

“No. No way. We’re not going.” 

“Great idea. I’ll get your bags.” Maya agreed with Pepper and went to go grab the bags but Tony didn’t want her touching their stuff. They were staying. 

“No. That is a horrible idea.” Tony pointed a finger up at her. “Please don’t touch her bags.” 

“Tony, this is how normal people behave. We have to-” Pepper tried to explain to Tony but he was cutting her off. 

“I can’t protect you and Peter out there!” Tony knew they had to stay put. They couldn’t go anywhere right now. 

Maya was cutting the both of them off now. “Um… is that normal?” 

Tony and Pepper both looked up to see her pointing to the giant bunny. “Sadly yes.” Pepper said. 

“Yes this is normal! It’s a big bunny, relax about it!” Tony didn’t know why he was yelling but he was annoyed at the situation. 

Pepper turned to him. “Okay. Calm down.” 

“I got it for you. Peter likes it better and it's your gift.” Tony said to Pepper, gesturing to the bunny blocking the stairway. 

“Of course Peter likes it more. He’s eight year’s old.” Pepper tried to say to Tony but then Peter was running down the stairs and calling for his dad. 

“Dad? Daddy? Pepper said we had to leave- oh. Who are you?” Peter ran down the stairs and manoeuvred his way around the giant bunny then stopped at the bottom of the stairs at seeing the new person in his house. 

“She’s just a friend. Come here, Pete.” Tony held his arm out for Peter and pulled his son close to his side. 

“Dad? Are we really leaving?” Peter asked, looking up at Tony with his wide eyes behind his glasses. 

Tony ran a hand through his hair. “We’re gonna-” 

“Um, guys? Should we be worried about that?” Maya asked, pointing to the news on the tv screen. 

Tony let go of Peter and took a step forward to look at what was showing on the tv. Before he even had the chance to react, the window was breaking and an explosion was going off, sending all four of them flying backwards. 

Tony watched it happen as if the whole thing was happening in slow motion. His eyes landed on Peter who was being thrown back from the impact of the explosion and Tony knew right then and there that Peter’s small and delicate body wouldn’t survive the hit on impact so without even thinking, Tony tapped on his watch and had his suit wrapping around Peter’s body in only seconds. 

The next thing Tony felt was the air get knocked out of him as he slammed into the wall and landed on the floor. He took in a painful breath and sat up. “Peter. Where’s Peter?” 

The suit was lying on it’s back and Tony knew that Peter was way too small to properly operate it. Peter wouldn’t even be able to stand up on the suit since his legs wouldn’t be able to reach the ground so he would be sitting uncomfortably on the piece between the legs. 

Tony crawled over to his suit and tapped on the side to get the faceplate to open up. When it did, he sighed at the sight even though his heart was breaking to hear Peter crying. 

“Peter. It’s okay. Are you hurt?” Tony ran a hand over Peter’s face and took off his glasses that were now broken. 

“D-daddy! I want out!” Peter cried and attempted to lift his arms up in the suit. 

Tony tapped on the chest piece of the suit and immediately lifted Peter out of it once it opened up. He pulled Peter onto his lap and ran a hand over his body quickly to feel if he was okay. 

He was aware of the continuous explosions going off around them so he had to get Peter and Pepper out of there. 

“Tony! Peter!” Pepper yelled from where she was sitting up on the ground and holding onto her head. 

Tony tapped onto his watch again and sent the suit flying over to Pepper so she could get Peter out of there. He watched the suit wrap around her, keeping her safe but he still had Peter in his arms. 

Tony stood up, picking Peter up with him but then getting knocked over by another explosion going off. 

“Pepper! You have to get Peter out of here!” Tony yelled and stood up again. He managed to stand up fully and hoist Peter more into his arms. 

“Daddy! I’m scared! I don’t want to die, daddy.” Peter cried into Tony’s shoulder, wrapping his arms around Tony’s neck. 

Tony’s heart broke. He would not let that happen. “You’re not going to die. I promise you.” 

Tony went to walk over to Pepper but he was thrown back to the ground once again. Peter was lying on top of his chest and Tony opened his eyes just in time to see the ceiling break apart and about to fall on them but then Pepper was over them and holding her arm up in the suit to protect them. 

“I got you.” She said, the faceplate opening up to reveal her face. 

“Get Peter out.” Tony told her and grabbed under Peter’s armpits to lift him up again. 

Pepper stood up and held her arms out to Tony to take his child but the floor started to break apart, separating the two of them. 

“Tony?” Pepper asked, desperately.

Tony felt Peter cranking his neck to look at the floor breaking apart and their side slowly falling down. He held onto his dad tighter and cried harder. 

“Daddy. I know you say I’m a brave boy but… I’m not very brave now.” Peter cried into Tony’s shoulder and tried to wrap his legs around his dad's waist but that was really hard to do with the way Tony was holding onto his bottom. 

Tony wanted to reassure Peter but they only had a matter of seconds. “Pepper! I’m gonna throw Peter to you! Get ready to catch him!” 

Peter heard what was about to happen and shook his head violently. “No! No! Don’t throw me! No!” 

“I have to, Peter. You need to let me go!” Tony told Peter desperately and ignored the cry of fear that left his son's mouth. 

Tony waited for Pepper to get ready to catch his precious cargo before he was grabbing Peter between his legs and on his chest to get ready to launch him. 

“No! Daddy! Don’t!” Peter screamed desperately and tried to get out of Tony’s hold. 

Tony ignored him and took a few steps to get some momentum before he was throwing his son over to Pepper like he was launching a football. 

Pepper caught Peter easily and held him in one of the Iron Man arms. Peter was reaching desperately for his dad like his life depended on it. 

“Get Peter out!” Tony yelled and tried to wave her away. The house was about to go down at any moment. 

“What about you?!” Pepper yelled.

“I’ll go around! Get Peter out! Now!” Tony watched Pepper turn around and ran towards the front door that was now unrecognizable. 

He ran over to the side and grabbed onto a metal bar hanging from the ceiling. His house that held so many memories of his son and him was getting destroyed. 

Tony didn’t have time to think about that though since he was now having to dodge bullets. 

“Sir, Peter and Pepper are clear of the structure.” JARVIS announced to him so Tony held his arm out and hoped his suit reached him on time. 

Outside, Pepper placed Peter onto the floor and seconds later the suit was being pulled off of her. She knew that Tony was calling the suit back to him so she knew that Tony was okay. For now. 

Peter tried to run back into the house, screaming. “Daddy! No! I need to get him. Give him back!” 

Pepper grabbed onto Peter’s wrist and pulled him back. “No. It’s too dangerous. He has his suit now. He’s going to be okay.” Please let him be okay. Peter can’t lose his dad again. 

Peter screamed and fought against Pepper to get to Tony but Pepper held the eight year old tightly in her arms so Peter wouldn’t run into the house that was currently falling apart piece by piece. 

It broke her heart to watch. 

Peter was born and raised in that house, so many memories that were not and always will be memories because the house wasn’t going to be standing in just a few more minutes. 

“DADDY!” Peter screamed as loud as he could and desperately reached out for the house. “My daddy!” 

Pepper felt the tears run down her cheeks as she silently cried. “Peter, he’s okay. It’s okay.” 

Peter didn’t hear Pepper on top of all his messy crying and screaming so Pepper just stuck to holding him tightly in her arms to try and comfort him and keep him from getting injured. 

She didn’t believe in god but she prayed to whatever was out there to make sure that Tony comes home to Peter this time. 

Peter didn’t stop trying to get out of Peppers arms until the firefighters and police showed up. Then he calmed down a bit and went deadweight in Pepper’s hold. 

She was kneeling on the ground, facing what once was their house. She held Tony’s child in her arms and rocked him side to side. 

Peter was sobbing into her chest and clenching her shirt desperately in his tiny fist. Peter was completely oblivious to everything happening around him now and Pepper zones it out as well. 

“Please don’t let daddy be gone again. Not again. Please.” Peter begged desperately but Pepper wasn’t sure if the child was talking to her or not. 

She continued to hold him until someone was talking to them. She looked up to see two officers looking down at the two of them with a sad look on their faces. Pepper looked away. She didn’t want to be looked at like that again. 

“Ma’am, we would like to ask you some questions.” One of the officers said. 

She didn’t want to talk to anyone. 

“Ms. Potts. We need to ask you some questions.” The other one said, a bit desperately. 

Pepper let go of Peter to stand up. She wiped her eyes and looked at both of the officers. “You see this kid here? I’m all he has left right now so no, you don’t need to talk to me.” 

Peter stood up as well and was lifting his arms up for Pepper desperately. Pepper hadn’t picked Peter up in a few months. She picked him up when Tony, Peter and her would sometimes play fight so she would pick Peter up then but that’s about it. 

It wasn’t that he was heavy, he was actually very light but Tony was always the one who picked Peter up now. But now Tony wasn’t there so she had to comfort the eight year old. 

Pepper lifted Peter up by his underarms and put her hands under his butt to support him in his arms. She felt Peter wrap his arms around her neck and lay his head on her shoulder with a sigh. 

“Do-do you think d-daddy is okay? I’m so s-s-scared.” Peter sobbed out and it broke Pepper’s heart to hear the kid that she grew to think of as her own over the years say. 

She didn’t know the answer to that question. It was like when Tony was in Afghanistan all over again and it terrified her so much to think that Tony might be coming back this time. 

“I… I don’t know, Peter. I don’t know.” Pepper admitted honestly. She didn’t know if maybe she should be the one to lie to the child so he had hope but if this isn’t another Afghanistan situation then she didn’t want to give Peter that false hope. 

The truth was that the house was gone and so was Tony. She didn’t want to think about his body at the bottom of the ocean but that was all that she could think about. 

She let out a sob that she had been holding in which triggered Peter to let out a sob of his own then the two continued to cling onto each other as if their life depended on it, and in a way it did. 

“I j-just need him to be okay, Pepper.” Peter cried out, brokenly. “I don’-don’t want to lose my daddy again.” 

Pepper just continued to hold Peter. She didn’t know what to say to make him feel better so she just held him. 

She didn’t know how long she was holding Peter for while she ignored all the people moving around them. She eventually put Peter down and sat herself down on the side of what used to be the walkway up to the house but was now a pile of concrete. 

Peter wiped the now dried tears off his face and he walked over to one of his daddy’s Iron Man helmets. He knew he wasn’t ever allowed to touch anything that belonged down in the lab without his father’s permission or presence but the sad truth was that Tony wasn’t there. 

So Peter walked over to the helmet and bent down to pick it up. It was a lot heavier than he expected so he had to hold it on his stomach to get a good grip. He looked down at it and tried to imagine his dad with him. 

It was the closest thing that he had to a father at that moment. 

That was when Peter looked more carefully at the helmet and saw a blinking red light inside of it. He looked inside more carefully then turned to run to Pepper. 

“Pepper. Look.” Peter ran over to Pepper and handed her the helmet. “It’s a blinking red light. What is that?” 

Pepper took the helmet from his hand and held it up to her face. She then put it over her head and saw a scan that verified it was her before a message started playing. 

As soon as she heard Tony’s voice, she started crying but happy tears this time because that meant that he was alive. Peter’s dad was alive. 

“Pepper it’s me. I’ve got a lot of apologies to make and not enough time to make them.” Tony’s voice rang through her ears. “I want to start off with saying that I’m sorry for putting you and Peter in harm's way. It was stupid and selfish of me. I need you to keep Peter safe now. I know… I know this is horrible timing with it being Christmas right around the corner and… I stole a poncho. Off an Indian. And, I can’t come home. Not yet. I love you. Tell Peter I love him more than anything and that I’ll find my way back to you guys soon.” 

Tony’s voice stopped and Pepper let out a sob then pulled the helmet off her head. She looked at Peter who was watching her with wide, watery eyes. 

She nodded her head and smiled at him. “He’s alive. Your daddy’s alive, Peter.” 

Peter broke down and collapsed in Peppers arms to cry tears of relief. He was mumbling something incoherent but Pepper just continued to rock him back and forth. 

Maya walked up to them and looked down at them. “Pepper. Can we talk? I need you to listen to what I have to say.” 

Pepper stood up and pulled Peter up with her. “What makes you think I’m interested in anything you have to say?” 

Maya glanced down at Peter and then looked back up at Pepper. “Look, I know some things and I think it’d really benefit you if you knew them too so… can we go somewhere safe to talk?” 

Pepper held Peter closer to herself. She had to keep a promise to Tony to protect his kid but she needed to know what Maya wanted to tell her. 

“Alright. We’ll take my car.” Pepper said and walked over to where her car was parked a bit down the driveway. 

Peter grabbed onto her hand and tried to keep up with her walking so fast. “Wait, Pepper. What about daddy?” 

Pepper opened the back door and leaned down so she was face to face with Peter. “Shh, it’s okay. Get into your car seat.” 

Peter climbed into the car and did up his seat belt then reached over to grab one of his teddy bears that he must have left in the car from before. He hugged it to his chest and watched as Pepper shut his door and walked to the front driver’s seat. 

Pepper got into the car and started to drive away. It was a few minutes before she started to speak. “Why were you at the house tonight?” 

“I needed to talk to Tony about something important.” Maya answered. 

“What was so important that you had to speak to Tony?” Pepper asked. She glanced in the rearview mirror and saw Peter hugging his bear to his chest and looking out the window. 

Maya hesitated. “I think that my boss is working for the Mandarin. So if you still want to talk about it then I guess we get ourselves some place safe.” 

Pepper spared a long glance at Maya. She didn’t know what was going on but she had to get to the bottom of it so that’s how she found herself pulling into the parking lot of a motel at one in the morning. 

“Pepper. I’m tired and I want daddy.” Peter whined when Pepper opened his back seat door and helped him out of the car. She knew it was way past the child’s bedtime and that he was exhausted both mentally and physically. 

“I know. We’re going to stay here for the night and then we’ll see what we can do tomorrow.” Pepper reassured him and grabbed onto his hand to lead him into the motel room. 

She glanced at Maya who was sitting on the bed to wait for Pepper. “Just give me a few minutes to get him settled.” 

Maya nodded then Pepper took Peter into the bathroom. “Do you need to go pee before you try and get some sleep?” 

Peter hugged his bear tighter to his chest. “When are we gonna see daddy, Pepper?” 

Pepper sighed and kneeled down to be closer to Peter’s height. “Not yet. I’m sorry but I don’t know when exactly.” 

Peter whimpered. “I wanna go home. All my toys and my bedroom are all gone now. We don’t have a home anymore.” 

Pepper nodded. She was heartbroken over the fact that the house where Peter was raised was gone in under ten minutes. 

“It’s okay. Once your dad comes back then we’ll get a new home where we will make more memories.” Pepper reassured him once again. 

“O-okay. But… but I don’t have any pyjamas. Or my toothbrush.” Peter said sadly and stuck out his bottom lip in a pout. 

“That’s okay. How about you sleep in your comfy track pants and your cool red shirt? That looks super comfy. Is it?” Pepper faked her excitement for Peter. 

Peter shrugged and nodded his head. “I guess so. I’ll just go pee and then I’ll go to bed.” 

“Alright. I’ll tuck you and bear in and I’ll be here the whole time.” Pepper stood up and ruffled his hair then left the bathroom, leaving the door open a crack behind her. 

She ran her hand last through her hair and paced near the bathroom door while she waited for Peter to finish up. 

“I’m all done, Pepper.” Peter announced and glanced over at Maya as Pepper led him over to the other bed and pulled back the blankets. 

Peter climbed in and hugged his bear while Pepper tucked him in so he shut his eyes and tried to think about his dad and when he was going to see him again and how he was going to give him the biggest hug and kiss and then smack him for scaring him like that. 

The next thing Peter knew, he woke up to a loud bang and Pepper screaming. 

“Peter! Run! Go-” Pepper was cut off by the guy lifting her up by her neck against the wall. 

Peter stood up in his bed and he screamed. “Nooo! Let her go! Get off!” 

The man ignored him and continued to hold Pepper up as she struggled. 

Peter glared at the man and screamed at the top of his lungs which he knew was loud because it even hurt his ears. His dad always told him he had the lungs of an Opera singer. Whatever that meant. 

“Shut up!” The man yelled at him but Peter didn’t stop. The man then let go of Pepper and went to grab Peter but Peter tried to kick him and jump off the bed only the man grabbed him by the ankles and pulled him down in front of him. 

“Killian!” Maya yelled. “Stop it! You’re scaring him!” 

The man who was holding Peter down, turned to look at Maya. “What? You’ve gone soft on me?” 

“He’s just a kid.” 

Killian turned towards Peter again and glared down at him. “He’s Stark’s kid.” 

Peter was screaming and trying to kick and squirm to get out of the bad guys hold but he couldn’t. All of the sudden, Pepper got up and punched Killian on the side of the face which caused him to stumble back a bit. 

It gave Peter just enough time to roll onto his stomach and crawl away. He got off the bed and ran over to Pepper’s side. “Pepper! I’m scared!” 

Killian turned towards the two and wiped the blood from his lip. “I deserved that. Now you need to come with me, Pepper. I’m so sorry I had to involve you.” 

Peter hugged Pepper tighter. “Stay away from us.” 

Killian shook his head and reached forward to grab a screaming Peter then lifted him up on his hip. He looked at Peter and smiled. “Cute kid. What can I say, Stark is a good looking man and has those good looking genes.” 

Peter didn’t mean to but he was so scared and just wanted his dad so when he felt the warm wetness start to leak into his underwear and onto his pants, he froze and let out a whimper. 

It took a few seconds for Killian to feel the wetness and when he did, he immediately dropped Peter onto the floor. “What the fuck. Nasty. You just peed on me! That’s why I’d never have kids. Filthy. All of them.” 

Peter stood there frozen. He didn’t mean to have an accident but it was the scary man’s fault for scaring him. 

“Alright. Take her. Let’s go.” Killian pointed around Pepper and said but Peter screamed again. Killian then turned around and looked at Peter. “Do you know someone’s number to come and get you because I’m not taking you with us?” 

Peter didn’t answer him. 

Killian turned towards Pepper who was pulling out her phone and handing it to Peter. “Call Happy. Happy will come and get you. I want-” 

Killian knocked Pepper out after that so Peter screamed again and crawled onto the bed to hide under the blankets where he was hopefully safe. 

Peter didn’t know how long it took for him to gain enough courage to crawl out from the blankets and peek an eye out. After seeing nothing, he reached for the phone that was on the bed and crawled back under the blankets. 

He unlocked Pepper’s phone and found Happy’s number then pressed call. 

He answered on the second ring. “Pepper. What is going on? Where are you?” 

Peter started crying even harder. “Happy. Help me. Daddy’s gone and the bad man took Pepper away!” 

“Woah. Hey, slow down, kid. Where are you?” Happy asked into the phone. 

Peter tried to stop crying but he couldn’t. “I-I don’ know! I’m scared. Pepper’s gone because he took her!” 

“I’m coming, Peter. I’ll be there in twenty minutes, just stay on the phone with me.” Happy ordered him and Peter tried to suck in a shaky breath. 

“I want my daddy!” Peter sobbed out and kept repeating the same thing over and over again until Happy arrived twenty minutes later. 

Peter peeked an eye out of the blankets and once he saw it was Happy, he got out of the blankets and ran over to the man. “Happy! Pepper’s gone.” 

Happy awkwardly hugged Tony’s kid and looked around the room. “It’s okay. It’s gonna be okay. Let’s get going.” 

Peter hesitated and looked down at his wet track pants. “I peed myself. I’m sorry. I was just scared and the bad man picked me up and I didn’t want him to and-” 

“Peter. It’s okay but we have to leave now.” Happy had already noticed the wetness on Peter’s pants but he wasn’t a babysitter so it wasn’t his job to clean that up, it was his job to get Tony’s kid somewhere safe. 

Happy grabbed Peter’s car seat out of Pepper’s car that was there and buckled Peter up into his own car and then he was driving to his apartment since he didn’t know where else to go. 

“Happy? Where are we going? We have to help Pepper.” Peter told him desperately from the backseat. 

“We’re going to go to my apartment until I know what the hell is going on.” Happy told the boy and prepared himself for the millions of questions that followed all the way to his apartment. 

He got Peter upstairs safety and then he had to help him with his pants. 

“When am I gonna see daddy again, Happy?” Peter asked while Happy dug in some drawers of an empty bedroom that just had one bed and one dresser in it. 

“I don’t know, kid. Right now, you need to change and sleep while I figure out what is going on.” Happy pulled out underwear, track pants and a shirt. 

“That’s girl underwear, Happy. I’m a boy.” Peter scrunched up his face at the girl underwear he was looking at. 

“They’re my seven year old nieces and I don’t have any nephews.” Happy said and held out the clothes for Peter. 

Peter grabbed the track pants that were grey and the purple shirt. “That’s okay. Dad once brought me girl clothes on accident and I wore them to school.” 

Happy grumbled. “I remember him telling me.” 

Peter nodded his head and pulled down his pants and underwear that was stuck to it then kicked them off. “Where do I put this?” 

“Jeez kid. Give me a warning before you change.” Happy averted his eyes and went to walk away. Tony once tried to force him to change Peter’s diaper when he was two and Happy ran. No way was he doing that. 

“What? I’m not doing anything wrong.” Peter went to follow Happy but Happy stopped him. “Daddy always stays with me when I get my pyjamas on.” 

“Well I’m not your dad, kid.” Happy said but then immediately felt bad about it. “Hey, you’ll see him soon. Get changed and I’ll make you a hot chocolate.” 

Peter wiped the tears from his eyes and pulled the track pants on, forgetting about the underwear since he didn’t want those on. He then took off his shirt and put the new one on and walked out into the hallway where Happy was outside, leaning against the wall and waiting for him. 

After Happy made him hot chocolate, Peter was starting to feel extremely tired. He barely registered as Happy led him into the same bedroom as before a tuck him in. 

It wasn’t the same as his dad or Pepper but at least he knew he was safe now. 

He went to bed thinking about his daddy and Pepper holding him in their arms again. 

.  
.  
.

The next time Peter woke up, it was to voices coming from outside the room he was in. 

Peter barely had time to register the night before and what happened because he knew that voice. 

Peter jumped off the bed and opened the door then made a run for it towards the voice. He spotted his dad standing next to the kitchen counter and just dad was spotting him and holding his arms out. 

“Daddy! Daddy.” Peter ran to cross the distance between the two. Tony lifted his baby into his arms and stood up. 

“Oh Peter. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry. I’m so glad you're okay. I was so scared. I love you so much my baby.” Tony squeezed Peter, probably a bit too tight but he didn’t care. He needed to hold his baby boy. 

Peter cried happy tears into his dad's neck. “I love you. I-I was so s-scared, daddy. I didn’t want you to be gone again.” 

Tony shook his head. “I’m not. I’m here. I’m okay, baby.” 

Peter pulled back to look at his dad’s face. “Pepper, the bad man took her and then I had an accident because he scared me so much and then Happy cake and gave me girl clothes.” 

Tony smiled but he felt his eyes tearing up. “I can see that. I thought I had a little boy and not a little girl-” 

Peter groaned and tried to give Tony a dirty look but he just looked like a puppy. “Hey. That’s rude.” 

Tony leaned forward to press a kiss to his baby’s nose. “I’m just teasing. But look, Pepper’s here too.” 

Peter snapped his head over to look at Pepper with wide eyes. “Pepper! You’re okay. I was so scared.” 

Pepper wiped the tears off her face and joined in on the hug. “I know. I’m here, Peter. Your daddy saved me.” Pepper pressed a kiss to Peter’s cheek and smiled over at Tony. “He always does.” 

Tony wrapped his arm around Pepper so Peter was sitting on his hip between the two of them now. “And I always will save you two.” Tony promised because that was a promise he would do anything to keep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhh two more chapters left and then this fic is over! I hope you guys liked that chapter and that it didn’t feel that rushed but we all know what happens in iron man 3 and I didn’t want to rewrite what we already knew. I’m also excited that this was the last time (kinda) of me writing something based off on the movies because I like to do my own thing and find it hard to follow a plot


	22. Out of the darkness comes a light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter gets bit by the spider

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii guys!!! Ahhhh there’s one more chapter left! I planned on writing the last chapter today but I got distracted and now I’m feeling really tired so I probably won’t write it today

“Do you want me to pick you up after your trip or are you going over to Ned’s house again?” Tony asked Peter from where he was leaning against the boys bedroom door and watched Peter shove everything into his backpack. 

“Uh…” Peter was distracted. He woke up late and he was going on a field trip to a new science exhibit that just opened up. “Ned’s mom is picking us up then we’re going to his house after for a bit.” 

Tony nodded his head and pulled out his phone to check the time. Peter had to leave in five minutes or he’d be late for his trip. “Alright. Text me if you need me.” 

Peter swung his backpack over his shoulder and grabbed his glasses off of his nightstand to put them on and ran past his dad to meet Happy in the garage who was probably getting impatient having to wait for him for so long. “I will! Bye dad!” 

“Uh Uh Uh, busy boy.” Tony stopped Peter. “Aren’t you forgetting something?” 

Peter stopped running and rolled his eyes playfully as he ran back to his dad to give him a hug goodbye. “Bye dad. I’ll text you throughout the day.” 

Tony hugged his now fourteen year old son against his chest and pressed a kiss to the top of his apple scented curls. “Hope you’re not too old to hug me goodbye still.” 

Peter pulled away from his dad even as he spoke, “Never. I love you.” 

“ I love you too.” Tony replied and with that, Peter was gone. 

Tony walked back into Peter’s bedroom to grab his dirty clothes so he could do some laundry and get started on some housework before he went to some meetings then busied himself in his lab for the rest of the day until Peter came home. 

He loved the fact that Peter had made a best friend who seemed to share the same interests as him. It was nice to watch Peter get so excited to go over to Ned’s house to watch movies or play with their legos but Tony had to admit that a selfish part of him was a bit sad that Peter was no longer his little shadow. 

Of course Peter still attached himself to Tony’s hip occasionally but it was starting to become a lot less often now. His baby boy was getting older and there was nothing he could do about that but come along for the ride.

Peter hadn’t been sleeping with him as much anymore which Tony sadly missed just a bit. He loved having Peter close to him and hearing his steady breathing when he slept and the way Peter would unconsciously cuddle up to him in his sleep. 

He missed it but it was down to about once or twice a month now. 

As hard as it was for Tony to watch his little boy turn into a little man, he was just grateful that he got to call himself Peter’s dad and that he was proud to say that he raised that beautiful brown eyed child. 

After they made the decision to move to New York a month before Peter turned fourteen, Peter had adjusted very well. That was only two months ago and Peter had already made a best friend in that short amount of time and now the two boys were inseparable. 

It was nice to see his kid so happy. Not that Peter wasn’t happy before, he had always been such a happy boy just with some strong separation anxiety from his dad for a lot of reasons. 

.  
.  
.

“I’m telling you, Peter, they have actual reptiles and mammals there. As well as other species. Who knows.” Ned shrugged and leaned against the sticky school bus seat to look at his best friend who was practically vibrating with excitement next to him. 

“No way. None of that was mentioned on the trip form.” Peter crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes at his best friend. 

“I’m being serious. It’s not my fault you barely looked at the trip form.” Ned sat you straighter and crossed his own arms. 

“Actually I didn’t even read the trip form.” Peter told him, a bit cheeky. “My dad did.” 

Ned rolled his eyes. “Whatever dude. I’ll just have to prove it to you when we get there.” 

Peter uncrossed his arms. “Fine. But I know I’m right.” 

When the bus pulled up to the new science exhibit, all the grade nines got out of the bus and got into a straight line to do a headcount and for the tour guide to give them all a day pass to be allowed into the building. 

Peter was beyond excited. 

He loved science. He grew up with Tony Stark as his dad and the man was always doing one thing or the other that involved science so he was excited to learn new stuff and go back home to tell his dad all about his day. 

The day had been going well for the most part. It was nothing like Peter had expected it to be on the inside but so far, he was right. 

They hadn’t come across any sort of live animals at all. Peter was excited because he won their argument but he was a little bummed out that he didn’t get to see some cool looking reptiles or something so when Peter and Ned trailed behind their tour group just a bit and came across a door that read do not enter, Peter immediately wanted to go inside. 

Ned gently nudged into him. “I dare you to go inside.” 

Peter thought about his dad’s reaction to him finding out that his kid had done something bad and most likely dangerous and how disappointed his dad would be. “No. I don’t want to get in trouble.” 

“Peter, literally no one is looking at us.” Ned whispered to him and nudged him closer. “Come on, Peter. I want to see what’s inside.” 

Peter sighed. He wanted to make Ned happy but he was a bit scared of getting in trouble. “Fine. You stand on guard just in case someone comes.” 

Ned smiled happily and Peter felt his heart start to speed up. He was scared but he already said yes. Peter walked towards the door and turned the handle then pushed, it opened. 

“Okay. I’m just gonna quickly look inside and come back out.” Peter told Ned and pushed the door open a little bit more. It was dark inside and he couldn’t see anything so he walked into the room a little bit more and let go of the door. 

It slammed shut behind him which caused him to jump and bang into something hard that rattled. The lights must have been motion sensored because they turned on right away and no one was in the room with him. 

Peter looked back at the door and saw that it slammed shut behind him. He just wanted to get out of there now so he went to try and open the door again but his eye caught sight of a cage. 

He turned to look inside and jumped back once a snake with two heads hissed at him. “Ah. What the heck.” Peter looked closer at the snake and a shiver ran up his spine. Ned was right. This place was freaky. 

Peter backed up a bit more and bumped into something else so he quickly turned around and saw a glass cage but there was no top on it which scared him a bit. 

When he looked in closer, he saw a black and white rat but it looked like they had… been stitched together. He looked away immediately because he felt bad for those rats who were obviously suffering. 

He wanted out of there now. 

Peter walked around the rat cage and bumped into another cage but this time he accidentally knocked the top off and watched it fall onto the floor, shattering into a million pieces. 

Peter was frozen on the spot. The sound was loud and it made some of the creatures in the room start to move in their cages which scared Peter. 

He went to jump over the glass when he felt something sharp burn his wrist. At first he thought a small piece of glass had gotten into his skin but when he lifted up his arm and looked down, his heart dropped. 

A spider, about the size of a dime, was crawling over his wrist. 

Peter squealed and slapped the spider off. He didn’t know where the spider went but Peter quickly got out of there because he didn’t care anymore. 

He rushed over to the door and opened it up, practically running straight into Ned. 

“Peter. Are you okay? You were in there for like, five minutes, man.” Ned asked him and Peter nodded his head. 

“Y-yeah. You were right.” Peter gasped out and pulled Ned so they could join the group. “There was like a rat. With another rat stuck to it. And-and a snake with two heads.” 

“What?! No way. I knew it.” Ned cheered. “I knew I was right.” 

Peter nodded. “Yeah. And there was this sp-” 

Peter cut himself off. He lifted up his arm and saw that there was a big red bump on his wrist with the skin all red and blotchy around it. Then, as if seeing the bump, all the pain suddenly hit him. 

His wrist was burning him. Like that one time he accidentally poured the kettle water onto his finger when he tried to make hot chocolate for him and his dad a few years ago. He had cried and his dad had carried him into his bathroom to take care of him. 

“What?” Ned asked, pulling Peter from his thoughts. 

Peter put his hand down. “W-what? Uh, nothing. Let’s catch up to the group.” 

For the rest of their time there, the pain would come and go but it was bearable. He kept looking at his wrist and saw that the bump was slowly going down until there was nothing there and no proof that he had gotten bit by that thing. 

Once the bump was gone, the pain was mostly gone too so Peter stopped worrying about it. 

His class grabbed their bags and belongings at the front and it was when they were loading onto the bus when a sudden wave of pain hit Peter. 

He grabbed onto his stomach the best he could by wrapping an arm around himself because an extremely sharp pain hit him all at once and it wasn’t like anything he had ever experienced before. 

Tears burned his eyes but then just like that, the pain was gone so Peter stood up straighter and looked around. Everyone was too busy getting onto the bus to worry about him so Peter swung his bag over his shoulders and walked behind Ned onto the bus. 

“So my mom is gonna pick us up and she said she’ll take us to McDonald’s. Then we can go back to my house and build my new lego set that I got… are you even listening to me?” Ned asked him and leaned closer to examine Peter’s face more. “You’re sweating. And you look really pale.” 

Peter shook his head but the motion made him feel sick. “M’fine. Uh, just a little car sick.” 

“But… the bus hasn’t even started yet, Peter.” Ned sat back a bit with a chuckle. 

Peter shut his eyes. He felt like he was going to vomit and shit his pants all at the same time and he preferred to do neither but if he was going to do one, he’d much rather vomit. He kept swallowing his saliva to hopefully stop the potential vomit from making an appearance. 

Ned continued to talk to him throughout the bus ride but Peter tooned him out until Ned eventually gave up talking and went on his phone. 

The bus’s smell as well as the noise and the bumps were making him feel sick and he just wanted his dad at this point. He wasn’t necessarily in pain but he was uncomfortable and he wanted a bathroom. Desperately. 

He wanted his dad’s bathroom back at home and not Ned’s bathroom. Peter opened his eyes and squinted at the bright light. He pulled his phone out of his pocket with shaky hands and opened up his dad's messages. 

“Uh, Ned.” Peter began and looked down at his phone. “I um… I don’t f-feel good. I’m just gonna text my dad to pick me up.” 

Ned turned to him. “What? But we had this planned all week. Please Peter.” 

Peter sighed. “I can’t. I feel like m’gonna be sick.” 

Ned frowned. “Oh. Are you okay? Maybe you ate something bad at lunch.” 

Peter didn’t answer. He started typing. 

Peter: Can you pick me up at my school? I feel sick

Peter put his head back but he felt his phone vibrate with a text right away. 

Dad: Of course, buddy. I’ll meet you at your school. Does your stomach hurt? 

Peter didn’t text his dad back. He put his phone back into his pocket and shut his eyes. It felt like hours but it was only thirty minutes when they arrived back at the school. 

Peter tried to push his way to the front to get off the bus but he was exhausted and dizzy so he got pushed around by other students. Peter finally got control of his body and walked down the steps of the bus. He paused and pushed his glasses up his face but his vision was blurry. 

He managed to make out his dad’s car parked on the side of the school so he quickly made his way over there. He opened the car door and threw himself down into the passenger seat then reached an arm out for his dad. 

“Peter. You’re white as a ghost. What happened?” Tony knew something was wrong as soon as he got a non descriptive text from Peter but he expected him to feel nauseous or have a headache, not this. Peter looked ill.

“Feel like vomiting. And…” Peter whimpered and now that he knew his dad was here to take care of him, he let the tears fall. He hated throwing up. He hadn’t thrown up since he was ten but when he did, he bawled his eyes out. 

Tony understood what Peter meant so he started the car and pulled out of the school parking lot so he could get home as soon as possible. “Does your stomach hurt?” 

Peter leaned his head against the cool window and whimpered. What didn’t hurt? His whole body felt like it was aching. 

“Okay. Just close your eyes. We’ll be home soon.” Tony reached a hand over and squeezed Peter’s thigh but Peter violently flinched. Tony pulled his hand away as if he had been burnt and felt fear run through him. 

Peter had never flinched from him like that. Or anyone for that matter. His kid loved physical affection so to think that Peter was now flinching because someone had hurt and taken advantage of his son, had Tony’s blood boiling. 

He didn’t touch Peter until they got home. He raced over to the passenger seat and opened the door, grabbing Peter’s backpack for him. “Can you stand? Do you want me to carry you, Pete?” 

Peter whimpered but shook his head. “No. I feel…” 

“It’s okay if you throw up. It’s okay, baby.” Tony helped Peter out of the car and slammed the door shut behind them but that had Peter flinching again and whimpering. “I’m sorry.” 

Peter’s head was spinning. 

He followed his dad into the elevator and he wanted his dad to touch him and comfort him but it physically hurt. It felt like his skin was on fire and his head was killing him as well as his stomach. 

“It’s okay, baby. It’ll be okay.” Tony reassured him again and it was then that Peter realized that he had been whimpering this whole time. 

He tried to stop but everything hurt so much. 

“Do you want to go into my room or yours?” Tony asked him once they got up the stairs. 

Peter didn’t answer but instead he headed towards his dad’s bedroom so Tony led him into the bathroom. “Do you need help?” 

Peter didn’t answer again as he dropped to his knees in front of the toilet and gagged but nothing came up. 

It hurt Tony to see his son in so much pain and he couldn’t do anything but watch. “Try and let it up. It’s okay. It’s okay, my baby.” 

Peter let out a sob and gagged again into the toilet but nothing came up. Tony grabbed a washcloth and soaked it with cool water then rinsed it out and walked over to Peter, kneeling down next to him. 

Peter was leaning against the toilet seat with watery eyes looking up at Tony. Tony felt his heart break at the sight. Peter was so small and in pain and it killed Tony to see. 

“Dad.” Peter whispered. 

“I’m here. I’m gonna put this cloth on your face to wipe you down and make you feel better, okay?” Peter didn’t say anything so Tony went ahead and started to wipe Peter down but Peter violently flinched again and lifted his head up. 

“Ow.” Peter cried out, looking at Tony like he had just punched him. 

“I’m sorry, baby. I’m sorry.” Tony put the cloth down and went to rub Peter’s back but he hesitated. He knew that Peter had a fear of throwing up and it was always hard on him but he still loved to be taken care of and he loved the physical affection that came with being sick so Tony didn’t understand why Peter was refusing any contact right now. 

“It hurts, dad.” Peter cried out and lifted his head off the toilet seat to look at his dad. “It hurts, daddy. Please.” 

Tony hadn’t heard Peter call him that in months. 

It made him want to jump into action faster and help his son, to take all his pain away but he didn’t know what to do or what was wrong with his kid. 

“What hurts, baby? You have to tell me so I can help you.” Tony reached out to brush Peter’s sweaty curls off his face but when he did that, Peter whimpered and moved his head away. 

“Everything!” Peter screamed out which was followed by a violent coughing session into the toilet bowl. Peter’s body tensed up before he was throwing up into the toilet. 

Tony looked at the vomit you try and see what Peter ate that got him this sick. All he could make out was his lucky charm cereal and some other stuff so it had to have been what they gave him for lunch or an awful germ he caught. 

“I’m gonna run very quickly to grab a thermometer.” Tony stood up but Peter was weakly reaching for him. 

“Don’ leave. Please.” Peter begged him which was followed by Peter vomiting into the toilet again. 

Tony was torn between quickly running off to grab the thermometer that he kept in the kitchen or staying with his kid but after Peter had looked at him with his big brown eyes, Tony couldn’t leave his kid. 

He grabbed the face cloth from the bathroom counter and wiped Peter’s mouth and chin to get the vomit off. “It’s okay. Let it all out. You’ll feel better soon. You just need to get it all out.” 

Peter continued to whimper and occasionally sob against the toilet bowl with Tony reassuring him and telling him that it’s all going to be okay but deep down, Tony felt like something wasn’t right. 

He always had a sixth sense when it came to Peter. He always knew when something was wrong with his kid before he was even aware of the issue. 

Tony’s parental concern was always right. 

Which was why he was absolutely terrified that something was really wrong with his kid. 

Although Peter seemed to calm down a bit, Tony still had that nagging feeling at the back of his mind but he ignored it for now. Peter was a little bit more alert and wasn’t crying out of pain anymore. 

“Do you want to go into your bedroom and try and rest a bit, bud?” Tony asked him and Peter whimpered again. 

“Your room.” 

“Okay. Let’s get you there then I’m gonna run and grab the thermometer quickly.” Tony helped Peter stand up and catch his balance. He waited for Peter to tumble over but it didn’t happen and Peter didn’t seem like he was in any pain so Tony hoped that Peter went through the worst of it. 

“I’m hot.” Peter said once he was lying down on the bed and Tony tried to cover him with the blankets after taking off his shoes that had been on the whole time. 

“I’ll get you another face cloth, baby.” Tony walked into the bathroom and approached the bed. Peter looked extremely sick. His face was pale and he was sweating profusely. 

Peter tugged on his jeans and Tony understood the silent request. He placed the cold cloth on Peter’s forehead but Peter whimpered and weakly pushed his hands away. 

Tony put the cloth down for now and unbuttoned Peter’s jeans so he could pull the uncomfortable material off his sick son. He tossed the jeans onto the floor and could feel the heat radiating off of Peter’s legs. 

“Do you want your shirt off too, baby?” Tony asked but Peter shook his head and tried to pull the blankets onto him. “No. You’re too hot. It’s not good. You need to cool down first, Pete.” 

Peter whimpered again and looked up at Tony. Tony could see that his baby was in pain and was scared. He cupped his cheeks and kissed his forehead, terrified of the heat coming off of his body. 

“I’m going to be right back. Stay here.” Tony left after that. He raced into the kitchen and grabbed the thermometer as well as Peter’s water bottle and filled it up with water. 

When he got back upstairs, Peter was in the same position but he was looking at the door, waiting for his dad to reappear. 

“I’m here. I need to lift your shirt up to put this under your arm.” Tony told him but Peter was just looking at him so Tony sat on the edge of the bed and lifted up Peter’s limp arm to place the thermometer there. 

As soon as it touched Peter’s skin, Peter’s eyes went wide and he started to cry out in pain. “Ow. Take it out. It h-hurts!” 

Tony quickly removed the thermometer from under Peter’s armpit and sadly sighed. “It doesn’t hurt, baby. It’s just cold.” 

“Make it warm.” Peter whimpered. 

Tony rubbed Peter’s face. “I can’t. It has to read your temperature properly. I’m gonna make it really quick.” 

Tony did it again and rubbed Peter’s stomach to try and get Peter to stop crying. When it beeped, he pulled it out and read 102.4. That was dangerously high. He had to get it down if he wanted to avoid a trip to the hospital. 

Tony grabbed the wash cloth and started to wipe Peter’s face again but Peter started crying harder and weakly pushing his hands away. “Stop, baby. I have to. You need to get your temperature down because it’s too high.” 

Tony wasn’t doing this to hurt Peter but Peter was crying like he was and it hurt Tony to see. He wanted Peter to be okay. 

Tony held Peter’s water bottle up to his lips so Peter could drink it while lying down but Peter pushed his head away. “No. M’ not thirsty.” 

“You have to get some liquid into your system so you can feel better.” Tony explained to him but it fell on deaf ears. “Peter. Open your mouth. You have to drink.” 

Tony’s phone started to ring on the bathroom counter but Tony ignored it for now. His kid needed him. 

“Shh, it’s okay. It’s just water.” Tony told him and pushed it more into Peter’s mouth because he knew his kid and he knew he was a Stark which meant he was stubborn as hell and if Tony didn’t use a bit of force, they would have been going back and forth all night. 

His phone started to ring again and Tony ignored it once more. He stayed with Peter until half of the water was gone. “Close your eyes and sleep now. I’ll be here if you need me.” 

Tony took Peter’s glasses off his face and set them on the nightstand table next to his bed so Peter could sleep. 

Peter was still whimpering but Tony wasn’t even sure Peter knew he was doing it or not. 

Tony stayed until Peter’s eyes shut and his breathing evened out. Just in case, Tony rolled him onto his side and propped his back up with pillows so he didn’t choke on his own vomit. 

He walked into the bathroom and grabbed his phone to see who called him. He was going to ignore it but then he saw that it was Pepper so he walked into the hallway and called her back. 

“Hey babe. I was just calling to talk to you.” Pepper said into the phone but Tony couldn’t talk to her right now. He just needed to let her know what was going on. 

“Peter’s sick.” 

“Aw, the poor baby. Is he throwing up?” Pepper asked and Tony immediately heard the concern in her voice. He knew she loved Peter just as much as he does and one of the reasons why they were trying to make it work between them was for Peter. 

“Yeah but he’s really sick, Pep. Something’s wrong. I know it.” Tony didn’t want to worry her but he had a strong feeling that something was really wrong with his baby. 

“What do you mean, Tony? You’re scaring me.” She asked as Tony opened up the fridge to grab some sprite so he could try and get him to drink it. 

“He’s… I don’t know. He’s just, i've dealt with Peter being sick more times than I could count but he’s pale and sweaty and he says it hurts when I touch him.” Tony put his phone on speaker so he could put it down and grab some sprite for Peter in one of his water bottles. 

“What’s his temperature at?” Pepper asked but Tony could hear something. 

“Dad?! Dad?” Tony thought Peter called so Tony placed the drink onto the table, picked up his phone and walked closer to the stairs. “Daddy!” 

Tony booked it up the stairs as fast as he could to get to his kid. “I’m coming, Peter! I’m coming!” 

Tony dropped his phone in the hallway but he didn’t care. He opened up his bedroom door and saw Peter thrashing on the bed. “Peter. Oh god.” 

“D-Daddy! It hurts.” Peter cried out and tried to reach up for Tony but it was like his arms were locked at his side. 

Tony kneeled on the bed and pulled Peter closer to himself. “What hurts, Peter? Tell me what hurts.” 

Peter tried to catch his breath but then he started moving around again as if his body was one fire. “Everything! Make it s-stop.” 

“FRIDAY! What’s wrong with him?!” Tony asked and tried to hold Peter still but Peter was hot to the touch and Tony knew something was seriously wrong. 

“Peter’s temperature is at 103.2. I suggest putting him into a cool bath to bring his temperature down.” FRIDAY supplied but Tony was too scared to even move Peter. 

“Ahh! Ma-make it go away! It h-h-hurts.” Peter threw his head to the side and continued to thrash back and forth. 

“I’m trying, Peter. We need to get your temp-” 

“It feels like I’m dying!” Peter screamed and threw his head back into the bed. Tony’s heart started to race even faster and his hands started to shake. “I don-I don’t wanna die. Please. Please, dad.” 

Tony shook his head. He was finding it hard to form words. “D-don’t say that. You’re not gonna die. I’m not gonna let you die.” 

Tony picked Peter up and carried him into the bathroom. “Run a bath, FRIDAY. Set it to the right temperature.” Tony ordered and sat down on the toilet seat with Peter’s burning hot body in his lap. 

Since Peter’s body was so hot and was radiating onto Tony, Tony didn’t even feel it when Peter peed on him until it ran down his legs. Tony didn’t react to it since he’s had worse on him from Peter. 

What scared Tony was that Peter didn’t even realize that he did that. That showed Tony how out of it Peter was and that he needed to get his temperature down right away. 

Once the bath was filled up, Tony stood up and carefully tried to place Peter in the cool water but Peter immediately started clinging onto him and trying to get out. “No! No! It’s c-cold! Dad. Out. I need… out!” 

“You need to get your temperature down first, baby. Please. It’s gonna be okay.” It has to be okay. 

Tony held Peter’s head up in the water but the water was just up to stomach. Tony soaked his hand and ran some water over Peter’s chest and his head to get him cooled down. 

Peter weakly pushed him away the whole time and then started tugging on his soaked shirt. “Off.” 

“Shh, don’t worry about that right now.” Tony moved his hand away and continued to hush his kid to get him to calm down. “FRIDAY, how much longer?” 

“I would suggest leaving Peter in there for ten more minutes.” FRIDAY told him so Tony continued to hold Peter who was now shaking from the cold. 

Tony wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or not. He hoped it was and that Peter’s temperature was hopefully coming down now. 

“Out. Cold.” Peter weakly muttered. 

Tony double checked that it had been ten minutes before he lifted Peter out of the bathtub. His back was going to kill him for that tomorrow since Peter was on the smaller side and always had been but he was still 105 pounds plus an extra five pounds with his soaked underwear and shirt. 

Tony grabbed a towel on his way into his bedroom and laid Peter down. He thought back to when Peter was a baby and Tony used to do this to him during his bath time routine with him every night. He used to lay Peter on the bed after a bath and put cream all over his body but now Peter was sick and in pain. 

“Get it off. M’cold.” Peter whimpered and tugged weakly at the bottom of his shirt so Tony ever so carefully pulled it off of Peter and tossed it in the hamper with his jeans. 

“I’m gonna go get some pyjamas for you, Pete.” Tony told him and went to leave but Peter started whimpering and reached a shaky hand out for him. 

“Don’ leave me.” Peter weakly begged but Tony couldn’t leave Peter soaking wet on the bed like that. 

“I promise I’ll be right back. I promise.” Tony rushed out of his bedroom and barged into Peter’s room. He grabbed a lego pyjama set that was thin so Peter wouldn’t overheat in it and raced back to his bedroom. 

Peter was in the same position but he looked so weak and lifeless at this point. Tony grabbed the waistband of his underwear without even really thinking about it and pulled it down so he could get Peter changed into his dry pyjamas. 

“FRIDAY, what’s his temp?” Tony asked again as he lifted Peter up and placed him up on the bed more. Peter was looking at him with barely any life behind his eyes. That terrified Tony. 

“Peter’s temperature is 103.1.” FRIDAY answered but that still wasn’t enough for Tony. He needed it to go down some more. 

Peter started to shake with his crying now so Tony sat on the edge of the bed and cupped his face. “Are you in any pain?” 

Peter whimpered and nodded his head. “I-I did something bad. And-and I don’ want you to be mad… at me…” 

Tony had no idea what Peter was talking about. It was normal for him to talk nonsense when he got sick. “I won’t be mad.” 

Peter hesitated. “I… I went into a room. That… I w-wasn’t supposed to go in. And…” Peter’s face scrunched up as he looked up at Tony and lifted his hand up to his face. “And a… spider bit me. At-at the trip.” 

Tony didn’t understand what Peter was saying. He grabbed Peter’s wrist gently and rotated it in his hand but he didn’t see anything. He thought that Peter was just talking nonsense. “Okay. It’s okay, Peter.” 

Peter shook his head. “No. It’s… the spider and there was two snakes, dad.” 

Tony cupped his cheeks. “Alright, Peter. I believe you. Was this in your dream?” 

Peter shook his head, frustrated. “No. It was… in the other room.” 

Tony nodded just head. “Okay. It’s okay. It’ll be okay.” 

Peter started shaking his head but then his body tensed up again and he started to thrash on the bed in pain again. “Dad! It h-hurts again!” 

Tony got off the bed to hold Peter's head from thrashing so much. “It’s okay. I’m right here, baby. I’m here. FRIDAY, what’s wrong?” 

“There appears to be an unknown substance in Peter’s body that I am having trouble identifying.” FRIDAY said and Tony mentally cursed. 

Peter looked up at Tony and screamed through his teeth then all of the sudden, his body went still and his eyes drifted to the ceiling. 

“Peter. Peter. Look at m-” 

Peter’s body started seizing and his jaw locked. 

Tony felt his own chest tighten at the sight of his kid having a fucking seizure on the bed. Tony turned Peter into his side since he knew not to try and hold Peter down this time. He checked the time to time how long it lasts. 

It felt like it was hours before Peter’s body stopped and he went limp. Tony had silent tears pouring down his face. 

“FRIDAY, call the MedBay. Tell them I’m bringing Peter down and to get ready.” Tony ordered as he lifted his son’s limp body off the bed and held him in his arms. “And call Pepper. Tell her to come to New York immediately because Peter had a seizure and he’s not waking up. Fuck.” Tony felt the tears pouring down his face as he looked down at his son’s practically lifeless body in his arms. He needed Peter to be okay. His only child. He couldn’t lose him. 

He still had so much to teach Peter and so much that Peter still had to experience. He wasn’t allowed to die yet. 

The elevator doors opened and immediately a team of doctors swarmed around Tony and started lifting Peter’s shirt up and sticking things onto his body. 

One of the doctors tried to take Peter from Tony’s arms and at first, Tony wanted to fight him and tell him to fuck off but then he remembered that that man was here to help Peter and not hurt him. 

“What happened?” One of the Doctors asked after the man took Peter from his arms and placed him on a bed. 

“Um… oh god. He-he had a seizure. I-...” Tony watched Peter’s shirt get cut off of him and then a bunch more stuff was tapped onto his chest. 

“How long did it last?” The same woman asked and Tony followed them as they wheeled Peter’s bed away. 

“Um, uh, two minutes, twenty one seconds.” Tony answered and rushed over to stand next to Peter’s head but Peter was moved onto another bed. “Is he okay? Why isn’t he waking up?” 

Just as Tony was about to reach out and hold Peter’s hand, he started to shake again so Tony broke down because his kid was having a second seizure in just a few minutes and Tony knew what that might cause. It could put Peter in a coma due to lack of oxygen going into the brain. 

The doctors turned Peter on his side and waited it out while they yelled instructions at each other. Tony felt like he was going to need some medical help soon if his kid didn’t stop seizing for the second time in under ten minutes. 

“Is he okay? Is my kid okay?” Tony asked but he got no answers from any of the doctors. Tony wanted to push his way through them but he knew Peter needed their help. 

Just then, Peter stopped seizing and opened his eyes. He started to trash around once he saw that he was in a new room with a bunch of strangers standing over him. 

Tony didn’t care, he pushed his way through the doctors and cupped Peter’s face. Peter’s fearful eyes landed on him and then he tried to reach his arms up but he barely had control of his movements. “Wh-hat’s happening?” 

“It’s okay. Your fever is too high so you need to let the doctors help you.” Tony calmly explained to Peter who was shaking and crying. 

“I’m scared, Daddy. I wan-I want-” Peter couldn’t finish his sentence because he started seizing again which had Tony turning away and throwing up in the garbage bin that was next to the door. 

“We have to incubate him. If he has another seizure he might not wake up from that one. Hand me the smallest one you got.” One of the doctors ordered and Tony watched as they rolled Peter into his back and opened his mouth to shove a tube down his throat. Tony thought that Peter must have stopped seizing while he was vomiting into the garbage bin. 

Tony looked away because he couldn’t look at his son being manhandled like that, even if the doctors were just trying to help him. 

“Mr. Stark,” Tony looked over at the gentle voice and saw a young woman looking at him with sad but kind eyes. “if you could follow me into the waiting area and let the doctor's work. I can assure you that your son is in good hands and that everything will be okay.” 

Tony didn’t protest. He was exhausted both mentally and physically and his kid could die. The kid that he raised and loved more than anything in this world could actually take his last breaths and die at any moment and he wouldn’t be able to do anything about it. 

All of their plans for the future together would be gone in the blink of an eye and there would be no going back. 

Tony broke down in the chair that the woman had led him to and then seemed to disappear. 

He put his head in his hands and just cried. He needed his son to be okay because he wouldn’t survive the death of his child. He wasn’t strong enough for that because he didn’t see any point in living without Peter. 

Tony didn’t know how long he was sitting in that chair for. His back was killing him and and his butt was numb but he didn’t give a single fuck. No one had updated him on his son so he had no idea whether or not Peter was okay. 

He also didn’t know how long it’s been because it felt like hours but it could have easily been minutes. 

“Tony?” 

Tony looked up and saw Pepper rushing towards him. He stood up and opened his arms up for her but as soon as she was in his arms, he felt like the dam broke again because he was crying into her neck. 

“Is Peter okay? Where is he?” Pepper pulled away from Tony and wiped her own tears. Tony saw how red her eyes were from crying on the flight over here. 

“I don’t know. I haven’t heard anything. I’ve just been waiting here.” Tony ran a hand through his hair and went to sit back down on the seat because he couldn’t stand without feeling like his legs were about to give out. 

“What happened to our baby?” Pepper asked and sat back down next to Tony. She placed her hand over his and squeezed. 

“He… I knew he wasn’t well. He’s really sick, Pep. I don’t… I don’t know.” Tony looked up and watched a doctor walk towards them with a regretful expression on his face. Tony shook his head in denial. 

“Peter is awake and is asking for you.” The doctor said and Tony let out a huge sigh of relief, he felt the tears start pouring down his face once again but this time they were happy tears. “Peter’s fever was 106.3 when you brought him down. That was what caused the first and second seizure and then it went up in a matter of minutes to 107.5 and I have never seen anything like it in all of my thirty years of work. I’m going to be quite honest with you, Mr. Stark, we were all prepared to come out here and tell you that your son is gone but as quickly as his fever came, it was gone.” 

Tony stood up and hugged the man because his son was alive. He wouldn’t have to plan a funeral for his fourteen year old son and he had all these doctors to thank. “Thank you. Thank you so much.” 

Pepper rubbed his back so he pulled away from the doctor and wiped at his face. “Can I see him?” 

“Of course, right this way.” The doctor started leading them down a hallway as he spoke. “I want to warn you that he still has a bit of a temperature. It’s not bad but we want to watch it for a few hours. It rests at 101.3 right now and seems to be going down quickly. He’s a bit delirious and tired but we want to keep him awake for another hour.” 

“And he’s not going to have another seizure? He’s okay now?” Tony asked to be sure because he never wanted to go through something like that again. 

“His seizures were a result of his extremely high temperature so as long as we keep his temperature down, he will be okay.” The doctor reassured him and opened a door. 

Tony’s eyes landed on Peter’s, the same time Peter’s eyes landed on his then Tony was crossing the distance between the two of them and hugging Peter in his arms. “Oh my baby. You’re gonna be okay. We’re okay now.” 

Peter hugged Tony back but not as strong because he was still feeling a bit weak. “Daddy. I was so s-scared. I-I woke up and-and you weren’t here.” 

Tony pulled away to cup Peter’s face. “I’m sorry I scared you, baby. But it’s okay now. You’re okay. Are you in any pain?” 

Peter shook his head and laid back down. “No. But m’ tired and they won’t let me sleep.” 

Tony cupped Peter’s cheek but then Pepper stepped into view and Peter’s eyes lit up. “Pepper. You’re here.” 

She wiped the tears that fell from her eyes and kneeled down to press a kiss to his forehead. “I’m here. And you’re okay, I was so scared, honey. You’re not allowed to scare me like that ever again.” 

Peter smiled weakly and reached a hand back out for his dad. “Can you hold my hand?” 

Tony’s face broke out in a genuine smile. “Of course, baby boy.” 

Peter tried to look behind him so both adults eye travelled to where Peter was trying to look. “What is it, baby?” 

“Where’s the window?” Peter asked, confused and Tony just nodded his head. They were warned about Peter being delirious. “There’s always a window for the cars and I can hear them.” 

Tony looked over at Pepper and shook his head fondly. “How about you, oh wait. You can’t sleep yet. Maybe I should get some-” 

Peter’s head snapped over to the door but there was no one there. 

“What is it-” 

Suddenly, the door was being opened so Tony turned to look at Peter then back up at the nurse who walked in. 

“How are we doing?” The nurse asked and Peter spoke up before anyone else could. 

“Where are the cars?” Peter asked the nurse, confused. 

The nurse smiled at Tony and Pepper and lifted up Peter’s chart to read a few things over. “The cars are all driving outside. There’s no cars in here.” 

Peter sighed and laid his head back down. “Are we on the ground level or higher up?” 

The nurse grabbed the thermometer and held it to Peter’s forehead but Peter turned away. 

“He hates getting his temperature checked.” Tony told the nurse and gently cupped Peter’s face. “Let the nurse check your temperature, baby.” 

Peter whimpered but shut his eyes and let the nurse put the thermometer onto his forehead then pull away a few seconds later. 

“Perfect. I know it’s annoying but I will be coming in every twenty five minutes for the next two hours to check your temperature.” She explained and wrote some stuff down on Peter’s chart. 

“But are we closer to the ground or not?” Peter asked again, more annoyed this time. 

Tony rubbed his cheek and Peter turned to him. “We’re in the MedBay. On floor 75, Pete.” 

Peter sighed like that wasn’t the answer he wanted. He tried to sit up but Tony pushed him back down. Peter’s face scrunched up and he turned towards his dad with his face scrunched up in disgust. “You smell like pee.” 

Tony chuckled at that and then Pepper was trying to smell him as well. “Well I wasn’t going to tell you but since you so nicely pointed it out, you peed on me, kid.” 

Peter’s face reddened and looked away from Tony’s eyes. “Oh. Sorry.” 

“It’s okay. You’ve peed and pooped on me more times than I can count.” Tony laughed and then pointed to Pepper. “And Pepper too.” 

Peter’s eyes went wide. “Pepper peed on you?” 

Both adults bursted out laughing. “Absolutely not. Your dad is saying that you mr have peed and pooped all over me many time’s too.” 

Peter felt his face heat up. “Oh. Well, I’ll try not to do it again.” 

Tony leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Peter’s face. “I love you so much.” 

“I love you too.” Peter replied but then his eyes shot up to look at the door but there was no one there. A few seconds later, the door opened and the same nurse walked in with a cup and straw. 

“Me again. I have some water for you to drink.” She walked closer to Peter but Peter moved his head away from the cup. 

“No. I’m not thirsty.” Peter turned his head the other way when the nurse held the cup up to his lips. “No.” 

“I’m sorry, sweetie but you have to drink it because your body needs some liquids.” The nurse patiently explained but Peter looked at his dad and started to cry, wanting Tony to do something for him. 

“It’s okay. I’ll try to get him to drink it.” Tony took the cup from the nurses hand and sat back down with the cup in his hand. “You’re not thirsty, bud?” 

Peter shook his head and started whimpering against the pillow. 

“You might not feel thirsty but your body is and in order for you to get better and for us to go back to our floor, you have to drink your water.” Tony explained to his stubborn child but Peter still shook his head and looked over at Pepper to help him. 

“Peter, listen to your father. He wants you to get better so you guys can watch some movies and build some more legos.” Pepper told him but Peter shook his head again and more tears fell from his eyes. 

Tony handed Pepper the cup of water and stood up. He knew it was a low blow but he didn’t have any other choice. “Alright, I’m gonna leave and Pepper’s going to come get me when you drank all your water, okay?” 

Peter tried to reach out for him to stop him from leaving. “No. I’ll drink it now.” 

With a smile, Tony sat back down and took the cup from Pepper to hold it to Peter’s lips to help him drink. 

“You little bugger.” Tony teased and ran a hand through Peter’s no longer sweaty hair. 

Peter grinned and continued to drink his water. 

He felt… different. A lot different but he didn’t know what it was or if he should say anything to his dad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys liked that:) I’m pretty sure if someone had the temperature that oeter did that persons brain would have melted but not peter but peter is Spider-Man now! Well technically he’s not yetttt but his body is!! 
> 
> I’m excited to write the next chapter but I’m not 100% sure what direction I want it to go in yet soooo ahhh!! 
> 
> Also I’m getting a kitten on Thursday!!! I’m sooooo excited omg omg I cant wait ahhhh!! I still don’t have a name picked out thooo! Any suggestions???


	23. I’m falling again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter was wayyyyy too long originally so I broke it into two separate chapters which I will be posting the last one on Saturday:))

Peter was released from the MedBay two days after he was brought down there. 

He felt okay. He felt better than okay and he didn’t really remember much from his sickness but he knew it was bad and that he scared his dad so now Tony was following him around everywhere and babying him which was starting to get a tad annoying now. 

“I can go to school, dad.” Peter told his dad for what felt like the tenth time that day. “I feel better and my temperature is back to normal.” 

Tony thought about it. Tomorrow was Friday and then he planned on keeping Peter home for the weekend and not let him out of his sight but he still wanted to keep Peter home for an extra day. 

Peter could sense his dad’s hesitation. “You can even check my temperature again. Like you’ve been doing every second for the last two days.” 

Tony narrowed his eyes at his son. “Excuse me for being a bit paranoid. You had three seizures in less than twenty minutes, kid. The doctors were planning on telling me that you were dead.” 

Peter looked down at his socked feet. He didn’t remember any of that. “I’m sorry. But I’m fine now, dad. I can go to school tomorrow.” 

Tony sighed. “Sorry, bud. I know you may not like my answer but I’m keeping you home for another day.” 

Peter groaned and threw his head back. He weakly kicked the kitchen stool but it hit the other one and knocked it over. He looked at his dad because he didn’t expect to kick it off that hard. 

Without another word, Peter ran upstairs to his bedroom because he was angry and frustrated. He slammed his bedroom door but it banged very loudly and hurt his ears so he flinched and turned around to see his door falling off its hinges and slamming onto the ground with another loud bang. 

Peter covered his ears at the noise because it was way too loud. 

He didn’t mean to slam the door that hard, just like the stools but the problem was that he didn’t use that much strength. He knew he couldn’t be captain of the wrestling team. He was on the smaller side so it was next to impossible for him to have taken his whole door down. 

The loud bang caused Tony to walk up the stairs and look in confusion at Peter’s bedroom door lying on the floor. He stopped and looked at Peter who had his hands over his ears. 

“Why did you do this?” Tony simply asked. By the looks on Peter’s face, he didn’t intend to rip his door off the wall. 

Peter shook his head. “I didn’t. I mean, it just… fell.” 

Tony nodded his head and lifted the door up, standing it against the wall in the hallway. “Alright. You need some time alone. Stay in your room until dinner time.” 

Peter lifted his hands off his ears and watched his dad walk away. He didn’t mean to do that. 

He had been feeling different for the past two days. Something didn’t feel wrong but something definitely felt… different. Like he was in someone else’s body and it felt weird. 

Peter sat on his bed and took off his glasses to rub at his eyes. He had a bit of a headache like his eyes were straining. 

When Peter opened his eyes again, everything was clear. He blinked in disbelief a few times and covered one eye to see what was going on. 

He put his glasses back on and saw that everything was in fact blurry. “What the heck.” Peter put his glasses on his nightstand table and walked over to his window to open the blinds and look outside. “Oh my god.” 

To Peter’s amazement, he could see everything. 

He was able to make out the people walking on the sidewalk and what the license plates of the cars passing by read. Peter stood up and rushed over to his desk to grab a book. He opened it up to a random page, set it up on the wall and ran to the opposite side of his bedroom and just as he expected, he could read the words on the page perfectly. 

Even with his glasses on, Peter was sure he wouldn’t be able to do that. 

“That’s so cool.” Peter whispered to himself and stood up to go into his bathroom so he could look at his eyes. Maybe the seizures that he had did something to his eyesight and caused him to have 20/20 vision. 

Peter climbed up on his bathroom counter to squat down so he could get a better close up look at his face. He didn’t look any different but he still felt different. 

“Peter? What are- oh I didn’t mean to scare you?” Pepper rushed out to catch him before he fell back but Peter already caught himself. 

Peter screamed when he heard Pepper’s unexpected voice then he fell back but he placed his hand on top of the counter and gripped onto nothing to catch himself. “What? Woah. Did you see that?” 

“See what?” Pepper asked him. 

“The way I caught myself! That was so cool.” Peter jumped off the counter and walked past Pepper to jump onto his bed. 

She followed him into his bedroom and joined him on the bed. “I’m just coming to check up on you. Your dad says you really want to go to school tomorrow.” 

Peter sighed and turned to lay down. Pepper followed suit and faced Peter. “I want to but he said no because he thinks I’m five years old so whatever.” 

Pepper reached out to cup his still chubby cheeks. “Your dad isn’t saying that to hurt you, you know he just wants to keep you safe. You and your dad have a special relationship, my little bug.” 

Peter smiled a bit and turned his face into his bed. “I guess. It’s fine though. I’ll sleep in and work with him in the lab all day.” 

Pepper sat up and patted his thigh. “That’s the spirit. Dinner is in ten minutes so wash up and come down.” 

After Pepper left, Peter sat up in bed and reached on to his nightstand table to grab his phone so he could look up a few things. He wanted to know why he felt so different but he didn’t know where to start. 

He didn’t have much time though since he was being called down for dinner so he put his phone back on the charger and raced downstairs. He was starving and felt like he could eat a horse. 

“I understand that saying now.” Peter said as he grabbed his juice from the fridge and poured himself a glass. 

“What saying?” Tony asked him as him and Pepper finished setting the table. 

“The saying, I’m so hungry I could eat a horse.” Peter explained. “Although I would rather eat like… a bunch of cheese burgers to make up the size of a horse.” Peter said and jumped over the open oven door to get to the other side. 

“Hey, why are you so hyper today? That was extremely dangerous, Peter. I don’t want to see you ever doing that again.” Tony had grabbed his arm and said to him. Peter often got really hyper and wild at random times but today was just too much. 

“Sorry. I’m fine though.” Peter looked at his dad eye him and then let him go. 

“Where are your glasses? Go put them on please.” Tony told him and put the last dish on the table then sat down with Pepper. 

“They’re in my room but I don’t need them anymore, dad.” Peter exclaimed and sat down, opposite Tony and Pepper. 

“Of course you do, Peter. Go get them please.” Tony told him again but Peter was shaking his head. 

“I don’t need them, dad. I can see. I had them on but it was giving me a headache but it’s never done that before and when I took them off, I could see so clearly and now my headaches gone.” Peter explained to his dad and Pepper and then shoved a piece of chicken into his mouth. 

Tony looked at him, confused. “That’s not possible, Peter. What do you mean you can see clearly now?” 

Peter shrugged his shoulders and shoved more chicken into his mouth. “I don’t know. Maybe… when I almost died,” Peter paused to chew and both Tony and Pepper tensed at Peter bringing that up in that way. “Maybe it like, did something to my eyes so now I can see.” 

Tony knew that wasn’t possible but Peter obviously didn’t need his glasses anymore which was weird. 

“We should take you to the eye doctor tomorrow to check out your eyes, Peter.” Pepper said to him but Peter shook his head. 

“No. Me and dad are busy tomorrow, right dad?” Peter looked over at his dad who was staring at him. Peter reached over and grabbed a broccoli, hesitated then shoved it into his mouth. 

Both Tony and Pepper stared at him with their jaws dropped. 

“You hate broccoli.” Tony observed. He and Pepper had been trying to get Peter to eat it for years and now Peter was willingly eating it. 

“What? I’m really hungry.” Peter shrugged his shoulders. “So… we’re having a boy day tomorrow, right?” 

Tony blinked a few times and stood up to grab the thermometer because maybe Peter was about to have another seizure. He walked back over and lifted up Peter’s shirt to stick it under his arm. 

“Hey, What are you doing?” Peter asked and tried to get his dad’s hands off of him. “That’s cold.” 

“Lift your arm. I’m trying to check your temperature.” Tony ordered him and finally got the thermometer under Peter’s underarm and just had to wait now. 

Peter looked at Pepper and gave her a dry look. She just shrugged her shoulders and then Tony was looking at the thermometer and feeling Peter’s head. 

“Dad. I’m fine. Can you stop?” Peter said annoyed and moved his head away from his dad. 

“I’m just making sure. Doctors orders.” Tony sat back down, content with Peter’s temperature but it still didn’t explain to him why Peter was acting so weird. 

For the rest of the night, Tony kept a careful eye on Peter. 

He forced Peter to sit still to check his temperature a few more times throughout the night and even checked on his kid a few times during the night just to make sure that Peter was still breathing. He was a bit paranoid. 

.  
.  
.

“I’m gonna be gone for two hours.” Tony told Peter the next afternoon while Peter was eating what seemed like his third breakfast of the day. “I want you to be good while I’m gone.” 

Peter rolled his eyes at his father's babying and nodded his head. “I always am. No leaving the tower and no using the stove.” 

Tony pressed a kiss to Peter’s head. “Alright. I’ll see you in two hours.” 

Peter waited for his dad to leave and then he quickly shoved the last of his food into his mouth and ran down to the lab. He knew that technically he wasn’t allowed to go down in the lab without his dad there but he knew what he was doing and Tony had taken the restrictions off the lab. 

Last night, Peter had done a lot of thinking and testing with his new found abilities. 

He did a lot of research. About different types of spiders and what happens if a spider bites you as well as types of radioactive spiders and what happens if one of those bites you. 

Peter was well aware of the fact that he got sick and now felt this way because of that spider that bit him a few days ago. He wanted to tell his dad but he wasn’t sure how his dad would react and he was a bit scared plus he knew his dad wouldn’t agree to what he had planned. 

He knows that he wants to use his new powers for good. He wants to help people. Just like his dad. 

He just didn’t know how. 

Peter sat at his work desk that his dad built for him when they moved there a few months ago. He spun on his chair to try and get some ideas of what exactly he had to do. 

The first step was figuring out how to help people without being seen. He would need to find some clothes that covered his body as well as his face but still let him stick to walls like he figured out he could do last night after Pepper scared him in the bathroom then he tested it out later that night. 

It was scary and exciting to say the least. 

Peter groaned and threw his head down on the desk with a loud thump. He just wanted to know how he could help people. 

There was a pen on his desk so Peter picked it up and threw it across the lab, annoyed. Although now he regretted that because he had to get up to grab it. Peter groaned but then an idea came to him and he got to work. 

It took him the full two hours to come up with the web fluid formula which was extremely stressful but he still had to add some finishing touches to it which ended up taking him the full weekend. 

His dad kept asking him what he was doing down in the lab but Peter always lied and said he was just doing some random stuff because he was bored. He could tell that his dad bought the lie since Peter would work down in his dad’s lab with him down there as well. 

There wasn’t really anything to hide because Peter wasn’t doing much. He was just doing some web testing then he planned on going out later that night to test it out. 

“I don’t know, bud.” Tony said to Peter later that evening after Peter asked him to go over to Ned’s house for a few hours. 

“Please, dad.” Peter begged him. “I’ve been sitting inside the house for like a week and I’m bored.” 

“You have me here to keep you company.” Tony teased and ruffled Peter’s hair. 

Peter gave his dad his best puppy dog eyes. “I want Ned. I haven’t seen him since the school trip. Please dad. I’ll text you and I’ll come right back at nine.” 

“I’ll pick you up at his house at nine.” Tony told him and Peter grinned. 

“Thank you. I love you.” Peter gave a quick hug to his dad but then Tony was standing up. “What are you doing?” 

Tony looked at him. “I’m driving you.” 

“What? No. I can take the bus. It’s not that far.” Peter’s plan was already falling apart. 

“Yeah, sure. Like I’d have my fourteen year old son take the bus in New York at seven in the evening. I’m sure a bunch of old creeps would be totally okay with that too.” Tony grabbed his keys off the kitchen counter and turned to look at Peter. “What?” 

“I can take the bus. I’ll be fine, dad. Really. Don’t you trust me?” Peter looked up at his dad through his eyelashes. 

“I trust you. It’s other people I don’t trust. Do I have to have the stranger danger talk with you again?” Tony asked seriously because he would give Peter the talk for the fifth time if he had to. 

Peter sighed. “No. Fine. Let me just go get my bag.” 

In the car, Peter was nervous since he didn’t know how to get away from Ned now. He had secretly texted Ned and told him that he’s coming over to his house but then leaving right after just to trick his dad. 

Ned hasn’t responded yet. 

Tony pulled up outside Ned’s house and put the car in park. “I’ll pick you up at nine. I don’t want you texting me to stay later.” 

Peter nodded and hesitated but then his phone buzzed with a text message. 

Ned: Ok but why? Are you in trouble? 

Peter leaned over to hug his dad and then grabbed his backpack and got out of the car. He walked up the steps to Ned’s house and knocked on the door. 

His dad always waited until he got inside the house and even though Ned texted him, he was still worried that the door wouldn’t open. 

When it finally did, Peter sighed in relief and waved bye to his dad. 

“Dude. What’s going on?” Ned asked him and shut the door behind him. 

“Nothing. I just lied to my dad so I’m waiting until he’s gone then I’m gonna leave again. But then I have to be back here at nine to get picked up by him.” Peter explained to his best friend while he looked out the door. 

“Why did you have to lie to your dad? And where are your glasses?” Ned asked him suspiciously and looked him up and down. Ned knew that Peter was extremely honest with Peter and told his dad everything. 

“I don’t need them anymore and I just had to. Stop asking questions.” Peter tried to peek out the window to watch his dad drive down the street. 

“What’s in your bag?” Ned asked and pointed to Peter’s backpack on the floor. 

“Nothing. Don’t worry about it.” 

Ned grabbed Peter’s backpack off the ground and opened it up before Peter had the chance to stop him. “Hey. Give it back.” 

Ned pulled out a pair of pyjamas and a bottle of something labeled web fluid. “What’s this?” 

Peter grabbed his bag back from Ned and shoved everything back inside. “Okay. I’ll tell you but you have to promise not to tell anyone, Ned. Not even your parents.” 

Ned looked at him with wide eyes so Peter continued. “Okay. Do you know how I went into that room during the trip? Well I didn’t tell you but I got bit by this spider, right, and then like that day I got really really sick and my dad was even crying and it was scary. So then, like I feel different now. Like… my body just feels different and I’m always hungry and I can literally stick to walls and like I’m super strong. Maybe other stuff too, I don’t know.” 

Ned was looking at him with wide eyes and his jaw dropped. “No way. Prove it. Climb that wall.” 

Ned pointed to the wall by his stairs and Peter narrowed his eyes at him. “No Ned. Just believe me, okay. So I have to go because I’m going to test my powers so I can save people just like my dad.” 

Ned had an unreadable expression on his face. “So… you’re like Iron Man but with spiders. You’re like Spider- Boy!” 

Peter rolled his eyes but it was kinda catchy. “More like… Spider-Man. So I’m kinda like my dad, right?” 

Ned agreed with him. “Yeah. I want to come.” 

Peter swung his backpack over his shoulder. “No. You can’t. It’s too dangerous.” 

“But Peter, that means it’s dangerous for you too. And technically I’m older. By six months which is a long time.” Ned told Peter but Peter didn’t care. 

“You can’t come, Ned. I’ll be back here at like eight fifty because my dad is picking me up at nine.” Peter opened the front door. “And no telling anyone. Or I won’t be your friend anymore, okay?” 

“I promise, Peter.” Ned watched Peter leave until Peter disappeared down the street. 

Peter was excited but scared at the same time. He had never lied to his dad before. Well, besides from when he used to flush his socks down the toilet and say it wasn’t him or when he would break something and blame it on his teddy bears. 

This was a huge deal and he felt extremely guilty. 

Peter thought about that the whole way to the alleyway that he found and was empty besides for the garbage dumpster. He looked around before hesitating and taking his clothes off, knowing that his dad would scream at him right there if he saw what he was doing. 

Peter stripped to his underwear and froze. He felt extremely vulnerable and was starting to regret doing this. He quickly grabbed the homemade suit that he made and put it on. It was a blue onesie that was old and frailed as well as a faded red vest that he drew little black spiders on each side. 

He knew he looked stupid but he couldn’t help but feel so cool in the suit. 

It made him feel like he was doing something good for his city. 

Peter grabbed the web shooters that he made and put them on his wrist. It was a bit clunky but he didn’t mind. He would just have to get used to it. 

He picked up his backpack and threw it against the wall then aimed his web shooters and attached his bag to the wall. “Yes!” 

Peter then shot another web onto the side of the building and carefully lifted himself up to test his durability. If he fell, he would definitely break something because he was getting higher and higher up but so far he wasn’t falling so that was good. 

When he got to the top of the building, he cheered in excitement and did a quick flip. It was so simple to do so he continued doing more flips just for the fun of it. 

After doing a few flips and testing out some of his web shooters to see how far he could shoot them, Peter heard a scream which sent a shiver down his spin. 

He ran over to the edge of the building and saw a man holding a knife towards a boy. Peter hesitated. He wanted to help out but he was scared. 

He knew that now he had the responsibility to do something because he could and if he didn’t do anything, whatever bad thing that happened would be on him. 

With that thought in mind, Peter climbed down the side of the building and jumped down so he was standing between the boy and the other man. 

“Hey! Leave him alone.” Peter cleared his voice. He sounded like he was a child, which he was but he didn’t want anyone to know that. 

“Who the fuck are you?” The man asked, looking a bit surprised to see Peter standing in front of him. 

“I’m Spider-Man.” Peter said with confidence and smiled behind his mask. He loved the way that it sounded. 

“Get the hell out of here if you don’t want to get stabbed too.” The man grumbled so Peter kicked the man in the knee which may have been a bit too hard because Peter heard a crack and then the man fell to the floor. “What the fuck! You broke my leg!” 

Peter started panicking because he didn’t mean to do that. He didn’t mean to use that much strength but he couldn’t control it. “Oh I’m-I’m sorry.” 

The man looked up at him and Peter felt a tingle run through his body, he didn’t like that feeling. It felt… bad but then the man threw the knife at him. Peter barely had time to move out of the way but the knife sliced his upper arm, causing Peter to whimper in pain and to use his other hand to grab onto his arm. 

“You don’t know what you’re doing.” The man spat out. “How old are you? Twelve? Go back to your parents.” 

Peter wanted to correct the man and say that he’s in fact fourteen but he knew that wouldn’t sound much better so he turned around and saw the boy who looked to be twenty, still standing there. 

“Thank you, Spider-Man. You just saved my life. Thank you.” The man told him and then pulled out his phone, grabbed his bag and ran. 

Despite the man telling Peter he looks twelve, Peter felt good about himself. Besides his burning arm. 

He crawled back up the wall which hurt because it was putting added pressure on his arm which was going to be next to impossible to hide from his dad once he picked him up. 

Peter felt himself start to get anxious since he didn’t have his phone on him and he just realized how dark it was outside so if it was past nine then he would be getting in huge trouble. 

Peter swung to the alleyway where he had his backpack and he tried to take it off the wall but it was stuck. Peter put his foot onto the wall for better grip and pulled. It was still stuck so Peter used all his strength until he felt it coming loose but Peter opened his eyes and saw that the bricks on the side of the building were starting to come loose along with the backpack. 

Peter immediately let go and ran a hand over his mask. “Common. Think Peter. Think.” 

He didn’t know what else to do. He had to leave his backpack so Peter managed to open the zipper and reach inside for his phone. He found it and pulled it out to immediately check the time. It was 8:55pm meaning that his dad was no doubt outside waiting for him already. 

Peter sent a quick text to Ned to open up his back door then Peter reached into his backpack and pulled out his pants and shirt and stripped down to his underwear, got dressed and held his suit in his hand while he ran back to Ned’s house. 

Once Peter got inside through the back door, he raced to the front door but paused to look at Ned who was coming down the stairs. “Quick. I need a bag. I’ll give it back to you tomorrow at school.” 

“Why do you-” 

“Ned! Hurry. I’ll explain everything later but I need a bag.” Peter rushed out but he saw his dad waiting in the car and it was already past nine so Peter opened the door and waved to Tony to show him that he was coming. 

“Peter.” Ned handed him a bag but paused. “Your arm. It’s bleeding. Like a lot.” 

Peter had somehow forgotten about his arm. He looked down and saw that his shirt was full of blood. “Oh. Can I also borrow a sweater?” 

Ned hesitated but grabbed a sweater from the hallway closet and handed it to Peter. “I think you should tell your dad, Peter. He’ll know what to do.” 

Peter put the sweater on and hissed when it pulled at his cut. “No. I can’t. I’ll get in trouble.” 

“You know he’s going to find out eventually, Peter. At least you’ll get in less trouble if you tell him now.” Ned said desperately to try and get Peter to listen to him. 

Peter groaned. “He’s not going to find out because I know what I’m doing. I have to go.” 

“You’re just a kid, Peter. You have to tell your dad.” Ned told him before Peter opened the door and left, he didn’t want to hear what Ned had to say mainly because he knew Ned was right. 

“Hey, bud. How was your play date?” Tony teased as Peter got into the car and put his bag between his legs. 

“Fun. Ned’s mom said I can go over to his house again straight after school.” Peter lied because he wanted to go out as Spider-Man again. It sounded so cool to think that; he was Spider-Man. 

“Well Peter’s dad says no.” Tony said, not caring about the argument he’s going to start. 

Peter shot his head to look at his dad. “What?! Why? I always go over to his house after school.” 

“Exactly. So you’re going to take a break from that and spend some time with me.” Tony said and Peter groaned. “You see Ned all day at school. I don’t get to see you.” 

“You saw me for like five days straight.” Peter argued but he actually enjoyed the time with his dad. After all, his dad was his best friend. 

“Do I have a limit for how long I can see my son?” Tony asked, annoyed because Peter had been giving him a lot of attitude since he got extremely sick. 

Peter looked down at his lap. “Sorry.” 

Tony shook his head and changed the subject. “What’s this? Did you and Ned change your clothes while you were at his house?” 

Peter cradled his arm against his chest. “I spilled grape juice on my shirt so Ned gave me his sweater.” 

Tony nodded. “Alright. Give me your shirt when we get home so I can wash it.” 

Peter nodded his head and leaned it against the window. He now had to go home and spill juice on his shirt without his dad knowing so he could hide up his lie that seemed to be getting deeper and deeper. 

Once they got home, Peter ran into the kitchen while his dad went down to the lab to get something and Peter took off the sweater, opened up the fridge and dumped some grape juice on himself then ran upstairs and took the shirt off. 

He covered up the blood stain, knowing that his dad would just toss it into the washing machine and not look at his shirt. 

“Can I have your shirt? Shower and wash up before bed then I’ll watch some shows with you before you go to sleep.” Tony said to Peter since that had always been their bedtime routine to get Peter to calm down enough to be able to sleep. 

Peter hesitated before speaking. “Actually dad…um, I think I’m just going to sleep after I shower and stuff. I’m really tired.” 

Tony eyed his son. “You’re what?” 

“I’m- I’m tired.” Peter glanced up at his dad and looked down. He felt his heart beating from all the lying he’s been doing. 

“Uh… okay. If you’re sure. Um… can I have your shirt?” Tony held his hand out for Peter’s shirt and then walked out of his bedroom. He had no idea what was going on with his kid. 

Tony walked into the laundry room and tossed the shirt onto the pile of clothes so he could grab some laundry soap to try and get the stain out. When he picked the shirt up again, his eyes didn’t land on a grape juice stain but rather a fucking blood stain on the sleeve. 

Tony’s heart dropped. He ran a hand over it and raced back into Peter’s bedroom to see why the fuck his kid was bleeding. 

“Dad? What?” Peter asked, alarmed after he saw his dad march into his bedroom. 

“Stand up. Let me see your arm.” Tony grabbed Peter’s arm but Peter pulled his arm away, with a lot more force than Tony was expecting. 

“W-why? Nothing’s there.” Peter lied but he knew this was it, his dad was going to find out. 

Tony held up the shirt. “What’s this? This is a blood stain, Peter. Give me your arm.” 

Peter shook his head and took a step back. “It’s not. It’s just paint, dad.” 

“Oh yeah. What were you and Ned painting?” Tony asked but he didn’t believe Peter one bit. 

“Just… we were just- ow hey, get off.” Peter tried to stop his dad from seeing his arm but Tony already had a tight grip on him and Peter shut his eyes. This was it. 

Tony let go of his arm and grabbed his other arm but there was nothing there. “Are you lying to me, Peter Stark? Tell me right now?” 

Peter opened his eyes and looked at his arm but the cut was gone. There was nothing there but some dried blood. 

“W-what?” Peter looked at his other arm but it was gone. It was completely healed. 

“Peter. Look at me.” Tony ordered so Peter looked up at his dad and swallowed. He was in trouble. 

“Is there something you want to tell me? You know you can tell me anything.” Tony gave Peter a serious look but Peter looked away and let out a sigh. Tony knew he was keeping something but he had no idea what it was. 

“I know. I’m n-not keeping anything from you.” Peter lied and felt guilty about it. For a second he wanted to tell his dad everything and explain to him what was going on but he didn’t. Maybe he would regret that later. 

Tony eyed his son for a few seconds before pressing a kiss to his head and leaving to walk out of the room. “Alright. Call me if you need me. I’ll fix your door tomorrow while you’re at school.” 

Peter looked down at his feet. 

He was a horrible son. His dad and him were extremely close and now he was ruining that bond over what… nothing worth it. 

Peter felt his eyes burn so he shut then tightly because he didn’t want to cry tonight. He spent enough time crying over the last few days and he didn’t want to cry right now. 

He went into his bathroom and shut the door behind him and looked at his arm. The knife wound was gone. No evidence of it being there. Peter ran a hand over the spot but he didn’t even feel any pain either which was weird. 

An hour ago his arm had been gushing blood and hurt like hell and now there was nothing there and no evidence of anything being there. 

Peter didn’t know what that meant but he had a feeling and there was only one way to test it. 

He had to somehow go out as Spider-Man tomorrow after school.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had no idea how I wanted to make Peter become Spider-Man and him figure out everything and I didn’t spend too much time really thinking about it because I’m just done with this fic now so just one more chapter to go ahhhh!! 
> 
> Also I got a kitten today! Ahhhh I love him sooooo much omg omg hes sooooo freaking soft and adorable I just love himmm!!


	24. I will never stop holding your hand

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhhhhh the last chapter!!!!!!!

Tony didn’t know what was going on with Peter. 

It had been two weeks since the sickness and ever since then, Tony had noticed changes in his kid. Peter wasn’t… Peter. 

For starters, he was eating a lot more which Tony loved because he always tried to get Peter to finish his dinner and eat healthy to get his low weight up and now Peter was eating all his dinner and was still hungry after that. Then he developed an attitude which Tony was prepared for that since he was a teenager but Peter never gave him an attitude like how he had been giving him. It was almost scary because that wasn’t his Peter. 

On top of all that, Peter was lying to him. 

Tony knew he was. He knew his kid better than anyone else, better than Peter knew himself so Tony knew that Peter was lying to him but he didn’t know why or what about. 

He tried to get Peter to talk to him but the kid had been staying out at Ned's house everyday for the past week and a half and then coming home and going straight into bed. 

Tony knew something was going on but it was killing him that he didn’t know what it was. 

Later that day, Tony planned on grabbing Peter and carry him down to the lab if he had to. His plan was to get Peter comfortable enough so that hopefully Peter would open up to him and get him talking. 

“Hey hey, where are you going?” Tony asked Peter after he came racing into the penthouse and tossed his backpack onto the floor. 

Peter skid across the floor and looked at his dad. “What? I’m going to Ned’s house but I have to get something first-” 

“No Ned’s house tonight. It’s Friday night so you and I are gonna have a boys night.” Tony stood up to approach Peter. 

Peter shifted from foot to foot. “But I already promised Ned.” 

“Tell him I said no. You can make it up to him another time so go change and meet me in the lab.” Tony pressed a kiss to Peter’s head and gently pushed him off in the right direction of his room. 

Peter whined but he knew he wasn’t going to win this fight so he quickly changed, grabbed a snack and met his dad in the lab. At least he got time to work on his web fluids. 

“How was school, bud?” Tony asked, feeling like his own son was a stranger to him now. 

Peter shrugged. “Boring. I have better things to do.” 

Tony chuckled. “Like what?” 

Peter shrugged again and realized what he just said. “I don’t know. Just stuff.” 

“Do you have a girlfriend?” Tony asked him but he knew what the answer was. He knew Peter wasn’t ready to date anyone yet or barely showed any interest in any girls. 

Peter looked up at his dad like he’d been punched. “No. Ew. I don’t… you know I’d tell you if I did but I don’t and I don’t want one.” 

Tony smiled but it was sad because he was trying to figure it out. The only thing that Tony could have thought of was the fact that Peter had a secret relationship but even that thought was far fetched. 

“Then what are you hiding from me?” Tony blurted out. He hated playing the guessing game. “I know you’re keeping something from me but I don’t know why. You can talk to me.” 

Peter felt his heart drop. He looked down at his desk because he knew he was hurting his dad but he was in too deep now. “I’m- I’m not hiding anything from you, dad. Please. I just… I’m just a teenager and I have… feelings and stuff.” 

“I understand that but you’re not being yourself and you’re being all secretive but I’m here for you, Peter. I always have been and I always will be.” Tony was desperate at this point. He could tell Peter was thinking a lot but he wasn’t sure if Peter would break. 

“I,” Peter glanced up at his dad and quickly looked away. He felt his eyes burn with unshed tears because he wanted so badly to be able to open up but he knew Tony would take Spider-Man away from him and he couldn’t have that. It was too big of a risk to have his dad know. “I know, dad. And… I’m okay.” 

Tony shook his head and sighed. “I didn’t ask you if you were okay.” 

Peter shook his head and put his head down on the desk. He couldn’t keep lying to his dad how he was. He couldn’t live like this for much longer because the guilt was eating him alive. 

“Oh baby. Come here.” Tony felt his heart breaking. He held his arms out for Peter even though Peter couldn’t see because his head was down. 

Peter heard his dad’s request so he got off his stool and practically crumbled into his dad’s arms. He felt his father’s strong arms wrap around his tiny frame where he always felt most safe. 

“It’s okay, Pete. It’s gonna be okay.” Tony whispered against his head while Peter whimpered into his chest. 

Tony moved his arms so he could lift Peter up onto his lap but when he put his hands under Peter’s armpits and lifted him, he almost sent Peter flying into the air. He let go of his kid and had to grab onto his wrist to stop him from falling back. 

The two of them were looking at each other, confused. 

Peter rubbed at his eyes since he didn’t know why his dad just dropped him like that. “Why did you drop me?” 

Tony didn’t know what just happened. Peter was extremely light. Abnormally light. He has picked Peter up many times, especially in the last few weeks so he knew how much strength to put into it when lifting Peter up and now, Peter weighed just as much as he did when he was a young child. 

“Peter.” Tony said in disbelief. “You’re… light.” 

“What?” Peter asked, confused. He had no idea what Tony meant. 

Tony stood up and lifted Peter up again and this time he barely had to put any real strength into it. “Dad. What’re you doing?” 

Tony placed Peter back on his feet and ran a hand through his hair. “What the fuck, Peter. How is that possible?” Tony whispered that last part to himself and then grabbed Peter by the wrist to pull him onto his scale, ignoring Peter’s protests. 

“Stand on this.” Tony said but he didn’t wait because he lifted his kid up and placed him on the scale just because he physically could. Tony read out the numbers. 76 pounds. Tony looked on in disbelief and pulled Peter off then put him back on again. “What the-” 

“Stop it. You’re scaring me. I don’t-” 

Tony stood up fully and looked down at his son because everything was starting to fall into place. “You got bit by a spider.” 

Peter felt his face pale. “W-what? No I didn’t.” 

“You probably don’t remember but you told me you did when you were sick. I didn’t believe you. Now it all makes sense. Oh my god.” Tony could not believe he didn’t realize this sooner. It all made sense. 

The extreme sickness. The sudden super strength. The increase in appetite. The not needing glasses anymore. The secrets and lying and now the whole weight thing. 

“I-I wasn’t. I don’t… I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Peter was backing away from his dad but Tony was trying to think about how this happened. 

“The spider? Was it poisonous? But it couldn’t have been if you’re… it was radioactive. Wasn’t it?” Tony asked and stepped towards Peter but Peter turned and ran up into the elevator, shutting the doors behind him. “Don’t let him leave the tower, FRIDAY.” 

Tony got in the elevator after Peter got out and he went to Peter’s bedroom where he assumed his kid went. He tried to open the door but it was locked. “Peter. I’m not mad. Why would I be mad? Please let me in so we can talk.” 

Tony knocked on the door again but Peter wasn’t opening it and there was no answer from the inside. “Peter. If you don’t open this door in five seconds, I’ll have FRIDAY do it.” 

Tony waited five seconds and was about to ask FRIDAY to open the door but then he heard movement and the door being unlocked, revealing Peter on the other side. 

“I am not mad at you.” Tony reassured Peter and stepped into the room to sit on Peter’s bed. 

Peter didn’t move. He looked down at his feet in guilt and shame. 

“How long did you know?” Tony asked him and put his hand on Peter’s knee when Peter walked over and sat on the bed. “Have you known since you got sick? Or was it a bit later?” 

Peter didn’t answer. He didn’t want to admit anything or say anything about the bite and the spider. 

Tony sighed. “Alright. My phone has been ringing nonstop in my pocket so I’m gonna go answer that and leave you alone for a bit.” 

Peter just nodded his head and watched his dad leave. He tried to listen to the conversation in the hallway but he only heard his dad answer the phone then walk down the stairs. 

Tony headed down to his lab, a bit annoyed because he wanted to get somewhere with Peter but also even more annoyed since Fury was calling him. 

“Stark. I have been calling your phone for the past two hours.” Fury sounded mad but Tony didn’t care. 

“I was with my kid. I’m not gonna run every time you call.” Tony told him and sat himself down in his stool in his lab. 

“Well you’re gonna wish you did this time.” Fury began. “Look at the file that I sent you. There appears to be a new vigilante swinging around the streets of Queens.” 

Tony always got a tad excited for new potential superhero’s. He loved to do all the research on them and figure out who and what they are. 

“Do we know who they are?” Tony asked as he pulled up the file and waited for it to load. 

“We don’t have a clear picture. Whoever they are, they move fast and they’re small. Mostly all the videos and pictures are blurry.” Fury told him. 

“What do you mean they’re small? Like they’re tiny as in a potential Ant-Man?” Tony hoped that wasn’t the case. The last thing he wanted was another Ant-Man on their hands. 

“No. Small as in a small frame. Maybe they’re young.” Fury answered just as the file showed up. 

Tony began looking at the pictures of this new vigilante. It was hard to make out what exactly it was but he could see that they were wearing a red and blue outfit as they swung from building to building. It impressed Tony. The way this human moved through the air so gracefully as if they weighed nothing…

Tony looked closer. He couldn’t see their face but he clicked on a video and paused it so he could get a closer look at what he was dealing with. He zoomed in on what looked like a white type fluid coming out of their wrists. Tony zoomed in a bit more and saw that it looked like…spider webs. 

“I have to go.” Tony said into the phone, not waiting for Fury to say anything. 

He ran into the elevator and raced up to Peter’s bedroom because he needed to know. His heart was racing and his mind was going a mile of minute with a million thoughts. 

He didn’t knock and just opened Peter’s bedroom door. “Tell me it’s not you.” 

Peter jumped at the sudden noise and door being ripped open. He looked over at his dad with wide eyes. “W-what?” 

Tony looked at Peter’s old backpack that was sitting on his desk. Peter had been bringing it everywhere with him for the past two weeks so he snatched it off his desk. 

“Dad, no. Wait!” Peter tried to reach for the bag but Tony pushed him away. He unzipped the bag and pulled out the exact same thing he saw on that video that Fury sent him. 

A red and blue onesie with what looked like web shooters and a jar that read web fluid. 

Tony held the items in his hand and looked at Peter. “You lied to me.” 

“Dad, no.” Peter shook his head in denial. 

“You looked me straight in the eye and you lied to me. More than once, Peter.” Tony was hurt but more than anything he was terrified that his fourteen year old son was doing what he was doing. 

Peter continued to shake his head. “I-I…” 

“You what?” Tony pushed forward. He felt like a failure of a dad for not noticing sooner. He thought he was giving Peter his space but he made things worse and Peter could have gotten seriously hurt. 

Peter felt the tears burn his eyes but this time he let them fall because he couldn’t hold it in anymore. “I’m- I’m sorry. I-I didn’t mean to.” 

Tony scrunched up his nose to try and remain patient and not yell. “Sorry doesn’t cut it this time, Peter.” 

Peter let out a whimper and looked up to meet his dad’s eyes. “I-I just wanted to be like you, dad. I-I wanted to help people.” 

“I don’t want you to be like me. I want you to be better. I need you to be better than me.” Tony couldn’t stand the thought of Peter turning out like him. Turning to drugs, alcohol and sex to try and numb the pain of losing his parents and being left with so much responsibility. 

Peter wiped desperately at his eyes and looked down. “Please, dad. I-I need to keep doing this. Please.” 

Peter hesitantly reached forward to take his suit out of his father's hands and Tony let him. Peter held the fabric against his chest and took a steady step away from his dad. 

“After all the lying and sneaking around that you’ve been doing, I don’t know how I’m supposed to trust you again, Peter.” Tony hated the way Peter broke down but he couldn’t comfort him. 

He watched his son completely lose it in front of him but he didn’t do anything. He held his hand out, ignoring Peter’s crying and mumbling of ‘I’m sorry’. 

“This isn’t going to continue. Give me the suit.” Tony held his hand out, not giving Peter the option to say no. 

Peter shook his head and took another step away from Tony so Tony reached out and grabbed Peter’s hand to try and get the suit but Peter fell to the floor and tried to curl in on his suit. “Please don’t.” 

“I’m not playing with you, Peter. Give me the suit.” Tony bent down to try and grab the suit from Peter’s hold but he couldn’t. He kneeled down to get a better angle since he could tell Peter was using some of the strength that came with the spider bite. 

There was simply no way Peter was stronger than him. “Peter. I’m giving you five seconds to let go or so help me god.” 

Peter shook his head and looked up at Tony desperately. “Please, dad. I-I I’m trying to help people! I’m trying!” 

Tony wasn’t going to have his child continue on doing what he’s doing. 

“One,” 

“No! Please!” Peter cried out and grabbed onto the suit tighter. 

“Two, three, four… five.” 

Peter let out a loud scream followed by more crying and handed Tony the suit. “Here.” 

Tony took it from Peter and stood up to leave the bedroom but right after he shut the door, Peter yelled out. 

“I hate you!” Peter yelled at his dad and for the first time, he actually felt like he meant it. Tony was taking something away from him that he couldn’t control and was a part of him now. 

Tony quickly turned back around and walked over to Peter who was still lying on the floor. “You do not talk to me that way, Peter. I am your dad and I will not have that.” 

Peter turned his face away and shoved it into the carpet. He shut his eyes and heard his dad leave but he didn’t care to open his eyes. He hated his life. 

Back in the hallway, Tony looked down at everything he took from Peter’s bedroom and made his way down to the lab to try and cool off. 

Despite how right he felt for taking Peter’s suit away from him so he couldn’t continue to be this vigilante, he still felt like he was making the wrong decision. 

Peter’s heart was in the right place but his brain was not. 

He sighed and tossed everything onto his desk then glanced over at Peter’s desk. He should have picked up on what Peter was up to. His secret little projects that he had been working on. The little giddy smile that appeared on his face when he would be concentrating hard on something. 

Tony loved seeing Peter work. He stood up and made his way over to Peter’s desk to look at what he was working on. 

He knew his kid was smart but after seeing all the equations and math that Peter was doing, it amazed him how Peter figured all of this out so quickly and with no help. 

He did it all by himself. 

Tony sighed again. The reason why Peter had been so quiet, distant and lying so much wasn’t because of Peter’s vigilante things, well, it was but the main thing was the fact that Peter didn’t feel like he could come to him which was true, in a sense. 

Tony just wanted his kid to be safe and happy and if letting Peter continue on being the little crime fighting spider that he was helped that, then so be it. 

.  
.  
.

It took Tony a week to design and build what he planned out. 

He was spending hours in his lab. Day and night. Day and night. His and Peter’s relationship was definitely on the rocks. It was awkward between the two but both of them were too stubborn to say anything to the other. 

Tony knew that he had to be the adult and say something and he did try. He wanted to keep what he was making for Peter a secret but he did try to talk to Peter and get him to open up but it didn’t work. 

Peter was still extremely mad at him and although Peter did apologize for saying that he hated him, Tony knew that Peter still held some anger towards him. 

“Can you come over here for a sec, Pete?” Tony asked him after Peter got home from school that day. 

Peter ignored him and kept walking towards the stairs. “I have to go change.” 

Tony stood up to follow Peter to the stairs. “After you're done changing, I want you to come sit on the couch and talk with me.” 

Peter shrugged his shoulders and continued to walk upstairs. “Okay.” 

Tony sat and waited for Peter on the couch. He was a bit nervous just because he so desperately wanted him and his son to be best friends again. 

When Peter came downstairs, he went into the kitchen to grab a snack and sat on the opposite couch from his dad. Tony patted the spot next to him. “Are you scared of me? Come sit next to me.” 

Peter stood up and reluctantly sat next to his dad. “Yeah?” 

“So,” Tony began. “I don’t know how to talk to you about this because I know you’re still mad at me but I want you to know that I took the suit away from you because I love you and I don’t want anything to happen to you.” 

Peter stuck out his bottom lip and leaned forward on the couch, getting ready for an argument. “And you-”

Tony held his hand up. “No. Let me talk first. I’m not trying to start an argument with you. I… I love you, Peter. And if something happened to you then that would be my fault because it’s my job as your father to protect you and keep you safe.” 

Tony resisted the urge to hold his son. “I know that you want to continue doing what you’ve been doing so… I’ve been working on something for you but I have a question,” 

Peter sat up straighter, a curious smile appearing on his face. “What is it?” 

“What’s your superhero name?” Tony asked him, not able to keep the smile off his face. 

“Are you serious?” Peter asked him, grabbing onto his leg and trying to contain his smile. 

“I’m just asking you, kid. What is it? Underoos? Crime fighting spiderling?” Tony teased. He was loving seeing that smile back on his kids face. 

“Um… it’s Sp-Spider-Man. Like… Iron Man.” Peter was embarrassed that his dad might think he was being childish and trying to copy him. 

“Spider-Man.” Tony repeated to see how it sounded. “I like it. It has a nice ring to it.” 

Peter peeked up. “Really?” 

“Yeah.” Tony shrugged. “Of course Spider-Boy would be better fitting but what are you gonna do about it.” 

Peter blushed and looked down at his lap. 

“Stand up. I want to show you something.” Tony stood up and gestured for Peter to follow him into the elevator and down to the lab so he could show his kid what he was working on. 

“Why are we down here?” Peter asked, looking at his dad. 

Tony sat in his stool and pulled Peter so he was standing in front of him. “I want to show you something but before I do, I need you to understand that what I’m about to give you comes with a lot of rules of responsibilities.” 

Peter nodded his head, eagerly. “Yes. What is it?” 

Tony stared at his son for a few seconds before he stood up and walked over to a case. “Open it and see for yourself.” 

“... okay.” Peter looked down at the case and then up at his dad for reassurance. “How do I-” Peter pressed the button and the case immediately opened up. “Woah! No way! What! This is the greatest day ever! Are you serious, dad?! Is this actually… oh my gosh!” 

Tony smiled proudly. “Do you like it?” 

“Like it?! I love it!” Peter ran a gentle hand over the mask and then looked up at Tony. “Is it mine?” 

“Well it doesn’t fit me.” Tony chuckled and pressed the side button to get the suit out. “Take it. It’s all yours.” 

Peter carefully grabbed the suit from his dad and held it up in awe. “I can’t believe this is actually happening. Thank you, dad. Thank you so much. I love you.” 

Tony hugged Peter back, so happy to know that they were getting better and that he was seeing that smile appear on his son's face once again. “I love you too, bud, but before you put it on, I want to talk to you about the rules.” 

Peter nodded his head and the smile fell from his face a bit. “Okay. Y-yeah.” 

Tony gently took the suit from Peter’s hands and put it down then led him back over to his work desk. “So, if you are going to continue to be Spider-Man and if I am going to let you, you will follow the rules I set up. Do you understand me?” 

Peter nodded. “Yes.” 

“Okay, good.” Tony began. “So first, Spider-Man will not get in the way of school. If I see that your grades start to slip or you’re not sleeping enough and you have too much on your plate, Spider-Man comes down to my lab. When you come home from school, you will finish all your homework before you go out. On school nights you have to be home by eight and weekends you can stay out till eleven.” 

Peter looked a bit disappointed by the early time’s but he didn’t say anything so Tony continued. 

“I gave you a comm so you can talk to me without having to carry your phone on you. When I call, you answer. No matter what. If I tell you to come home, you come home. Don’t take on anything too hard, save that for the real Avengers.” Tony had a lot more rules but those would come in time. These rules were the most important. 

“Okay. Is that all?” Peter asked, bouncing on his toes. 

“For now.” Tony answered him. “I want you to know that these rules aren’t going to slide by if you decide not to follow them. I will take that suit away from you without a second thought.” 

Peter nodded his head. “Yes. I know. I’ll follow all the rules. Thank you. Can I try it on now?” 

“Go for it.” Tony watched Peter run off and grab the suit then he started to strip down to his underwear and hesitate before putting it on. 

The suit hung loosely on his body and it looked funny. Peter held his arms out awkwardly and turned to look at his dad. “Uh… does it get smaller?” 

Tony laughed and got up to walk over to his kid. “Press that spider on your chest.” 

Peter looked down and pressed the spider then the suit tightened around his whole body. “Woah. This is so cool. Woah!” 

“You look good, Pete. It suits you.” Both of them laughed at that, Tony was so glad to have his happy kid back. “To take it off you press the spider as well. It’ll only work for you and me. So if someone tries to get your suit off, they can’t.” 

Peter examined the suit on him with a huge smile. “Woah. You even put my web shooters into my suit. I love it so much.” 

Tony pulled Peter in for a hug. “I’m glad, buddy. You look good.” 

Peter beamed up at his dad. “Thanks. Can I go out and test it?” 

Tony hesitated but he knew he had to say yes, it was only fair. “Alright. Let me suit up so I can come.” 

Peter started bouncing in excitement. “Okay! Spider-Man and Iron Man.” 

Tony smiled at Peter. He had a superhero as a son now which would make life a lot more crazy and change a lot of their daily routine but there was one thing that wasn’t going to change and that was the fact that Tony loved his son more than anything and that he would always do what he had to do to keep Peter safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end!!!! 
> 
> This fic is finally over omg I loved writing it but o kinda fell out of love with it a few chapters ago so I’m glad it’s fine now:) 
> 
> As for what is going to happen in this fics timeline even tho I don’t write it..... Homecoming will happen but obviously it’ll be a bit different since tony knows and oeter is his son and stuff so it’ll just be peter trying to prove to Tony that he’s ready for more and tony saying no you’re not! Infinity war will happen :( Peter will turn to dust in Tony’s arms just like it happened in the movie ahh and tony will want to die along with Peter because his baby is gone and he will be depressed for five years but even tho he marries Pepper and has Morgan, he never gives up trying to figure out a way to bring peter back to him somehow. 
> 
> Then ..... endgame will happen.... tomy seees a chance at bringing his son back, he jumps on it but he doesn’t want to die trying because he wants to live a life with peter. Thor or Wanda or whoever the fuck can handle the snap will do it. Tony will bring peter to the cabin to his new house. They will be inseparable. Nothing after endgame will happen so peter will stay at the cabin and live life with his dad and new little sister and Pepper :))) 
> 
> The end.


End file.
